CHAPTER 37

Snape closed his eyes for a second, recalling the girl's smile as she hugged her wand to herself, sitting on his bed and her beautiful, firm breasts exposed for him to admire. He had made her smile. He had actually managed to make her smile!

As soon as he had seen that, he knew that he had chosen well, leaving all the priceless potion ingredients and rare jewels behind in the Dark Lord's treasure room. Making her happy and safe was what mattered. Not having a proper house for her. Not being able to brew all the potions in the world.

FUCK!

Shit! He'd botched the potion yet again!

Pulling out his wand, he cast an 'Evanesco' on the concoction that had turned an ugly shade of pink, reminding him of Umbridge, instead of the radiant red that it was expected to adopt.

Crap, he would have to stop thinking about her if he wanted to brew this correctly today. First, his hand had twitched at the wrong moment, adding one extra drop of the Acromantula venom, now he missed the right moment to stir it. It had NEVER ever happened to him that he would botch a potion twice. It was years ago that it had happened at all! Was he a Potion Master or a horny fifth year?!

The Dark Lord would remind him of his duties surely, a Crucio or two for asking for another ration of the ingredients. Fuck the bastard!

Squeezing the apex of his nose with his fingers and his eyes shut to clear his vision and mind, all he could see were her gorgeous nipples, peeking at him from the gap in his cloak, and his cock twitched at that - he could not even blame the last Cruciatus session for that, unfortunately. No more brewing today then.

Shit, he was screwed.

Even when he had had her only a few hours prior, he still had to use all his control and restraint to calm himself and his erection when he saw her there, naked and smiling at him; he'd wanted to kiss her like he never had before. It took long minutes of staring out of the dusty window, which he had spent so many days and months locked behind as a boy, to remind himself of the situation they were in. To tell himself over and over again that she did not want him to kiss her and never would. That the smile wasn't really for him but for the wand... Still, he was lusting after her like a horny teenager. How awkward... Did he really not have any dignity left?!

Fuming over his own thoughts and squeezing the beating stone in his palm, Severus ascended the staircase to the Headmaster's office. Dumbledore's office; he still couldn't bring himself to think of that room as his even though he had been the headmaster of this school for nearly a year now. Yet, it always felt so strange to place himself on the opposite side of the table he had spend so many hours at, talking to the old man...

Sitting down in the soft, cushioned armchair, he searched his pockets to find a pen - he kept hiding that thing as he would any openly Muggle thing in his situation and position but he was alone at the moment - when he touched something hard and angular instead. The girl's diary. Damn, he'd forgotten to return it to her.

Pulling it out to be able to extract the pen, the book opened and he glimpsed his name on the page, done in capital letters in her nice script - 'For Snape'. Was there a message for him there?

Intrigued, he spread the pages fully and began reading.

-FOR SNAPE-

-THE PIG-

Knockback Jinx

Oppugno Jinx

Revulsion Jinx

Bat-Bogey Hex

Bone-Crushing Hex

Stinging Hex

Sectumsempra

Cruciatus Curse

Imperius Curse

Killing Curse

...

The list continued on to the next page too, but he never turned it to see. This was not a message for him, he shouldn't be reading it.

Sighing tiredly, he closed the small book. Damn, the girl really hated him but he hadn't realised how much up until now. It was very like her to write all the curses down so she would not forget anything... She probably only planned to suffer him until he had found a way to release the two morons she called her friends, and then she would use this to get rid of him. He was only ever a tool, always to be discarded as soon as the time of its usefulness passes; it shouldn't really surprise him at all. Fair enough, she deserved to take her vengeance, for there was no one else in the world of the living that he had hurt more. He had given her her wand so she could do it at any time - it was not like he was going to fight her, ever - still, he rather hoped she would wait till the matters were at least a bit settled.

Fuck, he really needed to free the brats as soon as possible, no matter what the cost.

Checking his pockets to make sure he had everything he wanted to bring for her, he stepped into the fireplace; he did not even need to say the address as it was already connected only to Spinner's End for safety reasons. He did not want to Apparate there and thus alert the guards of his visits. It was also much quicker this way.

Putting the items on the wobbly kitchen table and then going straight to the library - that's where he kept finding her for the past four days, regardless of the time he had selected to come for a visit - he sat in the rickety armchair in the corner, as was his habit of late, and waited for her to acknowledge him. Sometimes it took minutes, sometimes seconds. The last time it had been nearly an hour before she finally looked up from the book and noticed him sitting there.

He had never met anyone before who could read with such a passionate zeal and he rather enjoyed watching her while she was at it, so he wasn't complaining in the slightest. He wasn't bothering her either obviously. Her quiet company was so very relaxing after his day of worries and never ending stress over all the students who had been punished and bullied that week while he was mostly powerless and unable to help in some inconspicuous way... Moreover, it gave him the opportunity to observe her when he dared to, letting his eyes stray from the pages of the book or magazine he had always selected for himself to make it look like he was reading too.

Her forehead was slightly frowned as she was focusing on the letters, remembering everything in detail, no doubt. Her hair kept getting in her eyes and she swept at it every few minutes, although she probably didn't even notice it herself. Good that he thought of ordering some hair bands, brushes and clips for her; he rather liked her with her hair free but he understood that it could get quite impractical at times.

She appeared to have lost some more weight though; he had commented on that two times already, reminding her to eat on a regular basis. She never listened obviously and he saw bones becoming even more prominent on her pale, slender hands as she held the heavy book.

She bit at her lip at that moment and moved to mark something down on a piece of parchment that she had spread next to the sofa she tended to sit on the most often. She didn't finish the movement though. Her eyes came to rest on his form instead and she froze, obviously forgetting what she had wanted to write.

"Good evening, Miss Granger," he greeted her quietly and put down the Potions Weekly magazine he had been pretending to peruse. She only nodded in response, an insecure expression appearing on her face. Damn, he always did everything in his power to seem harmless and nonthreatening to her and still it wasn't working...

"How was your day?" he asked her then, as usual.

"Fine," she answered shortly - no change there either. She never elaborated on that, never asked back. He will try again the next day, then.

They watched each other for a few seconds.

"I have brought some things that you may want; they are in the kitchen. Is there anything else you lack here?" he inquired then, hoping he would finally make her talk to him this time.

She shook her head to let him know that she didn't. She never spoke to him if she absolutely did not need to - not even to ask for the basics like shampoo or toiletries. She had never even told him what clothes to order for her, leaving him to choose even though he was at a loss for what to pick. He hoped the few pieces of clothes he had dared to bring today would not be too ugly for her this time - she had never used anything he had brought before except for the simple, white underwear, sticking to his old shirts and trousers that she had adjusted to fit her instead. Not that it did not suit her, he had to admit; the white shirts hugged her slender body perfectly, letting him see the outlines of her bra, and her ass looked so gorgeous in the simple, black trousers... Yet he noticed all of it currently hung rather loosely on her.

"You should be eating more," he told her again, trying to look stern.

"Yes, daddy," she replied, dropping her eyes back into the book whilst all of his thoughts froze, leaving him gaping at her.

What the FUCK?!

Standing up and leaving her there before he did or said something rash, he just about ran to the fireplace, feeling the dust whirl around him as his magic started to escape his control, going awry.

FUCK!

"SHIT!" he yelled aloud as soon as he saw the headmaster portraits, his legs still in the green flames and the furniture in the room shaking already.

So this was what she saw in him - he is too old for her obviously, on top of everything! Yes, he could have been her father - she was only 18, damn! By the wizarding standards it wasn't a big difference; it was common to live up to 150 so some 20 years was not such a big deal but she was a Muggleborn. She only saw him as an old, disgusting pervert who was there to rape her... No wonder she never wanted to talk to him!

Severus grabbed that books and potions piled on his desk and swiped them to the floor, revelling in the cracks in the broken glass. The contents of the shelves were next. Then the armchairs were thrown against the wall, causing the portraits to squeak and run for cover.

'Yes, daddy!'

Fucking Merlin's crap!

But then he halted suddenly and his hand, outstretched to tear down the empty frames, hung motionless in the air. The window panes finally stopped their rattling and crackling as all the fight and anger had left him at once, no trace of it left.

Daddy. Her not eating properly and looking somewhat sick. Her saying it quietly, with no venom in it, like she simply wanted to tell him. She never uttered a word more than she had to. It has been over a month now since they...

Fuck.

He IS a daddy then...

She's pregnant.

Sorry for the cliffhanger - again!

Many thanks to all those who reviewed and to Pirocantha The Brave who managed to conquer this chapter!

Let me know what you think, please! :-)