Out of Control
Chapter 37
Disclaimer: I only own London. And this didn't happen in real life. But in my mind, it is real.
A/N: JoMode, thanks for being amazing and always reviewing. I appreciate it! Denyingthetruth, thanks for the review :) I hope everyone's still enjoying this. There's quite an interesting twist coming up veryyyy soon. I appreciate all of the support! Love you guys! XoXoXo
Wade couldn't believe that London would really underestimate him that much. He had spent more than enough time with her at her house to know that the lock-pick to her bedroom was on top of the doorframe of her bedroom door. Wade went upstairs and grabbed the pick and quickly unlocked the door and opened it.
"London, please talk to me. I don't blame you for being upset with me at all," he spoke, sitting next to her on the bed. He placed the lock-pick on her night table. It really hurt to see how hurt she was. He placed a hand on her leg.
She sat up. "You turned your back on me when I needed you the most. Don't you dare act like you deserve to be heard."
"And I'm sorry for that," he apologized. "London, I'm truly, truly sorry…from the bottom of my heart."
The tears continued to fall from her eyes. "You don't have a fucking heart. I will never forgive you, Wade." He stood up and took a deep breath.
"I understand, and I'm sorry that I hurt you. I love you more than life itself, and I'm so very sorry."
"Do you wanna know why I was in the hospital?" she shot at him, finally overcome with the burden of hiding everything from him. Hell, if he was going to harass her about what happened, then, he could take on the burden of the pain.
"I do…" he replied, unsure of what to expect from her.
London opened the top drawer of her night table and pulled out a picture frame. She stood up and slammed it roughly against Wade's chest. "This is why I've been out, you fucking asshole!" she yelled.
He grabbed the frame and pulled it away from his chest and looked at it. Wade was silent for several moments, trying to understand exactly what he was looking at. London's arm were crossed over her chest, and she was shooting daggers at him with her eyes.
"L-London…i-i-is this a-a-a…" He took a breath and tried to get the words out again. "Is this a baby?" he asked her.
"No. It's a fucking monkey, you dumbass. Yes, it's a baby," she snarled back at him, resisting the urge to punch him.
"Oh my God…how long have you known?"
"One week after you dumped me. I found out right before we taped Raw," she replied, her eyes refusing to meet his.
Wade smiled. "So, we're having a baby? Oh my God, London. I can't believe it. I'm so sorry, sweetheart. I should've been around to help you and be there for you and take you to the doctor and everything that you needed me to do. But I'm going to make it right. I promise you, I'm going to make everything right."
"You can't."
"I can. And I will. Wait a second." He paused, thinking to himself about what she had said earlier. "You said that you were cleared by the doctor to come back on Monday. How can you be cleared if you're…?" he questioned her.
"Because I'm not fucking pregnant anymore," she snapped.
"But…but I don't understand."
"I've been out because I had a miscarriage," London told him, her voice more angry than anything.
"Oh…" He was clearly disappointed. "I'm sorry."
"Shut the fuck up. You're so full of shit, you know that? You're not the least bit sorry. What the fuck do you even care anyway? When I called you to tell you that I as pregnant, you weren't very nice to me and then, you hung up on me. So, don't act like you give a shit about any of this. You don't. You've made that quite clear."
Wade froze. Now, he felt like an even bigger piece of shit than he already did. He didn't think that it was possible, but it clearly was. He remembered that phone call. He felt awful about it, but he knew that if he stayed on the phone with her, he risked telling her the truth. "Oh my God," he breathed. "London, I had no idea. I'm so sorry for that. I shouldn't have hung up on you. I'm sorry for doing that to you."
She rolled her eyes. "Oh boy! All of those apologizes that are coming out of your ass are really making everything so much better for me. Thank God you finally apologized to me. Now, everything is perfect. I feel so much better," she sarcastically shot back at him.
"London, I know that I fucked up in every possible way that I could, but I'll do whatever it is that I can to make it right, I promise you that. I'll love you forever. I just want to be able to take care of you. I want to make everything right between us. Please, just give me one chance to fix it, and I'll make you happy," he begged her. "London, you know that I love you more than anything on this earth. Please, let me make it right."
She shook her head. "No. I don't trust you, and I never will again. I can't forgive you. I've lost everything, Wade. Everything that has meant anything to me left me. You turned your back on me and left me like it was nothing. I lost my baby. And I was so happy to be a mother…even without you in the picture. I didn't care about that at all. I was just happy that I was finally going to have a baby. That's all. I was perfectly content with things the way they were. I would have taken care of everything for my child. And now, my baby is gone. And you wanna stand here and look me in the face and tell me that everything can go back to the way that it was before. You're in need of a fucking therapist, you fucking moron."
"London, I'm not stupid. I know that it can't go back to how it used to be. But we can move forward together."
"You are out of your mind. I want nothing to do with you. I never even want to see you again," she told him.
"You know you don't mean that."
"Oh really? Because on the contrary, I know that I mean that, Wade," she insisted firmly, grabbing her framed sonogram picture out of Wade's hands and held it against her, tightly hugging it to her body.
"You love me, London. I know you do."
"Oh, I know I do, too. I do love you very much…more than anything on this earth, but that doesn't mean that I'm willing to forgive you or be with you ever again, for as long as I'm alive," she told him.
"Can we just talk about this?" he questioned her, almost pleading with London. He couldn't leave now. Now that he knew the truth. He couldn't leave her. He couldn't let her go. He wouldn't. He was determined to make this right with her. He wasn't there for her when he should have been, but he was going to be there for her now.
"About what?"
"About all of this. I have made some massive mistakes. I hurt you really badly. You have no idea how sorry I am for what I did. I love you, and I want to be there for you more than anything. I made a lot of mistakes here, Lon. But I'm also here now because I want to make everything right. I love you. Please, let me show you how it can be."
London shook her head defiantly. "You ended us, and we're over. That's the end of it. While I was pregnant, maybe you would have a better chance, and I would be willing to work on us because we would have been having a baby. But there's nothing tying us together anymore. There's no reason for us to even try to work it out."
"We love each other. I'd say that's a pretty good reason to give me a chance to show you that we can work."
"After what you put me through?" she asked him in disbelief.
"Lon…"
"I think you need to go now."
"But we—"
"Wade, please?"
He finally gave up, not wanting to upset her more than he already had, but this wasn't going to be over. Not by a longshot. "Alright."
London was having a really hard time dealing with her confrontation with Wade. She didn't want to go back on the road anymore. She wouldn't be able to see him every single day without losing her mind. Seeing Wade made her even more upset. She thought, initially, that it would help her get some closure, as she would have not had to worry about him finding out because he would be able to help her heal. But it only complicated everything so much more. She couldn't believe that he had dumped her over complete bullshit. That hurt. She suffered for nothing. And she blamed Wade for that. She couldn't forgive that. He should have been there for her, but instead, he walked out on her for nothing.
"London, are you okay?" her father asked, walking into her living room. He had his own key to her house.
"I guess."
"I rang the doorbell…and knocked."
"I'm sorry. I guess I was just thinking about things."
"I grabbed your mail," he spoke, placing a few envelopes on her coffee table. He sat on the couch, at her feet.
"Thanks."
"Are you gonna tell me what's going on with you now? You're acting really weird. Not answering your phone. Not answering the door. You're sitting here, looking like you've seen a ghost," he observed.
"Wade showed up yesterday," she admitted.
The Undertaker's eyes went wide. "I'm sorry, what did you just say?"
"He came here yesterday. He was trying to figure out what had happened with me," she told him.
"And what happened?"
"He told me that he had lied when he told me that he didn't love me…that he did it so we could fix our relationship without you having to deal with him being in the picture anymore. I told him that you wouldn't have turned your back on me and would have accepted it, if you knew that I was happy. And he apologized a lot. I basically told him to go fuck himself."
"Well, that's very nice of you, but did he really say that was why he did it?" he questioned, throwing in just a bit of sarcasm.
She nodded. "Yeah. And he still wouldn't leave me alone. So…he knows about what happened," she told him.
"Really? How did he take that?"
She rolled her eyes. "He acted like he's an honorable guy. Such bullshit. I can't deal with that shit."
"Maybe he meant it. Maybe he does care."
"Oh God no. He's a fucking asshole, dad. He's nothing but a selfish son of a bitch."
"I'm not disagreeing with you. But maybe he can help you…."
"Help me with what?" she asked, looking disgusted.
"With everything that you're going through right now. With the miscarriage and stuff," he offered.
London raised an eyebrow at her father. "Everything that I'm going through right now is all his fault. The last thing that I ever want to do is have to see him again. And as for the mis—…what I'm going through, I'm fine. Seriously, I don't need anyone's help dealing with anything because I'm over it already."
Her father gave her a look. "You think I believe that bullshit you're trying to feed me right now?"
"It's the truth, so you should believe me," she shot.
"I'm really worried about you," he said, patting her calf.
"Why, dad? I'm fine."
"Because you might think that you're fine…though I think you know that you're definitely not fine…but London, this isn't an easy situation to deal with. I honestly can't imagine what you must be going through right now. I'm sure that it isn't easy at all. But you keep acting like losing the baby was no big deal."
"It hurts, okay? A lot. But I'll be alright. I'm an adult. I can handle myself."
"You can act strong, and I'll admit, you're always been really strong and handled things with a lot of maturity, but it's okay to be sad when you're sad. It's okay to hurt and feel that hurt. It's okay to cry, you know?"
"Dad, I'm fine," London insisted.
"Maybe you should talk to someone."
"Maybe you should shut up about it already. I don't want to talk about it. What is so confusing about that?" she questioned him, frustrated.
He sighed. "Well, if you change your mind, I'll do whatever I can to help you."
"Thank you, but it isn't necessary."
"I love you, London. I know you think that I'm just an annoying father, but I'm just really concerned about you. You're my daughter, and I love you more than anything in this world, and I will do anything for you that I can. I need you to understand that."
"And I do. I just don't want to talk about it."
"I know you don't, but if you keep it all inside, it isn't going to go away or get any better. It'll only get worse. It'll fester, London. I just don't want you to have to go through any more than you are already are. That's all," he told her.
"I know. But I'll be okay, dad. Really, I will."
"I hope so. I'll do whatever I can to help you out, sweetheart. I just want you to be okay. You know that you mean the world to me. You always have, and I don't want you to have to feel alone in this. I'm your father. I'm here to protect you. And I can't really do anything but be here for you," he spoke, his voice sincere.
"Thank you, dad. I appreciate that."
"I love you."
"I love you, too."