Hello everyone! I am sorry it has taken me so long to get this chapter out, but I have had to retype it a few times. It is still not quite right, but I needed to get these plot points across. The next chapter has some action in it and some Scallison, so don't worry. Thank you to each of you for your reviews: lovelyloupus, Norte Dame fan, Athena, DoubleDee and everyone else—you rock! And you are all the reason that I am still writing. A bit ago, someone asked me about posting the story on a Dydia site, and I cannot find the review to respond to them, so if you are still reading, please message me the link so I can see the site. I would love to put the story up in other places as well. Thanks again all and I hope you all enjoy!
Chapter 37
Lydia woke the next morning to a weird pressure on her abdomen, slowly opening her eyes, she looked down to find Jade snuggled into her belly, her head resting on Lydia's abdomen and her little arms wrapped around her with her hands tucked under Lydia's body on both sides. Looking to her right, Lydia saw Derek still sleeping with Isabel curled into his chest, her tiny fist gripping at his skin. Even in his sleep he held the baby gently to him so that she could not roll off of the bed. She was taken by how peaceful he looked holding the baby, his brow relaxed and a slight smile on his lips.
Lydia did not remember the kids getting into bed with them. After she ran out last night, she found Jackson and discussed his memories of the Kanima and how cognizant that he was during his time as the Kanima. He had been reluctant to discuss it, but Lydia had some ideas about how to open him up today. She wanted to get him to relax enough to let the Kanima out. When she got back to her room, Derek was asleep.
She felt Jade move in her sleep, pushing her head closer to Lydia, running her hand over the little girl's head, she smiled. Lifting her hand, she ran a finger down Derek's nose, grinning as he fought to stay asleep. Lydia was struck by how much calmer he was now; he barely slept at all when they first started running and he certainly was never calm enough to sleep deeply. Looking at him now, holding their kids and dreaming, she felt her eyes start to tear, they had all changed so much.
Derek opened his eyes to Lydia and Jade curled together in an adorable way. "Hey," he rasps at her, trying not to disturb the girls.
"Hey," She smiled back.
"Did you work things out with Jackson?" He asks.
"Well, it was a fight, but I think I know where to start today." She ran her hand over Jade's hair again, "When did they get here?"
"I brought them in here a few hours ago, Is was fussy unless she was being held and Jade said if Isabel got to sleep with us then so should she," Lydia giggled, "Oh really?"
"Yeah, she said that she wanted to listen to her little brother and that she couldn't sleep without hearing her little brother and sister," Derek rolled his eyes.
"She did, did she?" He nodded as they both looked down at their daughter clinging to Lydia's middle, "Can you? You know hear him?" Lydia quirked an eyebrow.
"Um, yeah, but it is still really subtle, like it is through water, but yeah I can hear his heartbeat." Nodding, Lydia let the idea of him being able to hear the baby sink in. For once, she actually wished that she was a wolf so she could hear her own baby. "How does that work with female wolves? Can they hear their own baby if they are pregnant?"
"I don't know, you would have to ask one, ask Kay. I don't know if you can hear something that is inside of your own body. I have to focus on it to hear it; generally my hearing is normal unless I focus on listening to something."
Jade stirred again, stretching slowly and opening her eyes with a yawn.
"Morning babygirl," Lydia smiled, rubbing her back.
"Morning mommy," she rubbed her nose into Lydia's stomach, "Morning baby."
Giggling Lydia looked at Derek, raising her eyebrows, she silently asking if they should tell her, he shrugged like she knows. "Jade, what baby?"
"My baby brother," she scoffed, "the one that lives in your belly." Chuckling Lydia asked, "How do you know that there is a baby in my belly?"
"Cause I can hear him Mommy his heart beats and he wiggles," Jade says as if it is the simplest thing ever.
"How do you know it is a boy?"
"Cause I do. The lady in my dream told me that my brother was important," Lydia and Derek looked at each other with shock and a bit nervous about Jade's dreams of Kate. Before either of them could ask her about it she announced, "I'm hungry, Daddy can you make me pancakes?" She addressed her father for the first time.
"So you remembered that I am here huh?" he teased. "Of course, you make good pancakes," she said as if it were obvious.
"Okay Jadie, we can make pancakes, but you can't tell anyone about your baby brother okay?"
"Okay Daddy," she agreed with no fight, either she really wanted pancakes or she somehow understood the precarious situation of the young family.
Once they all got up, Derek handed a still sleeping Isabel to Lydia and walked Jade down to the kitchen to start breakfast. Lydia snuggled with Isabel for a while and then got dressed in jeans, a purple t- shirt and a green hooded sweater, pulling her hair into a ponytail. Once Isabel was awake, changed and dressed, Lydia settled her on her hip and joined the others in the kitchen where she found Stiles and Jade engaged in an intense game of go fish while Erica giggled and commentated and Isaac watched with an amused glare. Jackson and Boyd stumbled in, both clearly still half asleep. Lydia moved to put on coffee, Isabel babbling happily from her hip as the baby played with her mother's ponytail.
Jackson crossed to her, kissing Isabel's head, the little girl smiling at him in return. Eventually everyone else made their way to the kitchen to eat breakfast. "Jade put the cards away so we can set the table okay," Lydia brushed the child's hair out of her face. "But mama, I was winning," she whined.
"You can beat Uncle Stiles later, for now, clean up your mess."The little girl stuck out her lip, "But Mama, I don't want to."
"Now Jade," the stern look on Lydia's face moved Jade into action, clearing away the cards while everyone else kind of chuckled. Jackson muttering, "You are so mean, Mom."
Lydia hit him lightly, "Shut up." Scott laughed.
"McCall, I would laugh if I were you, you will be parenting soon enough. How is Allison?"
"She is still sleeping; I think she is ready for the baby to come. She is just so tired of being stuck in bed." Lydia nodded despondently, worried for her friend. "Has Janie figured out why the baby is growing too fast?"
"She and my mom are still working on it. Right now they think that maybe she is growing because of her healing ability." Lydia nodded and Boyd piped up, "They think the baby is reacting to the pre- eclamsia by developing at an accelerated rate?"
Scott nodded, a little shocked that Boyd understood the issue so clearly when he himself did not, "Yeah, that is what they said, how did you know that?"
"I like medicine." The large wolf said, shrugging as if his aptitude was not a big deal. Lydia piped up, "Maybe you should go to medical school."
"Maybe," he smiled, a little embarrassed but grateful for her support.
Lydia left them alone to make a plate for Jade and soon everyone had settled at the table to eat. "so, tomorrow is the full moon, are we going to run practice drills?" Erica asked while eating her pancakes.
"Yeah, we need to run a full defense plan, so that means all of us," everyone nodded. Scott added, "Yeah, this is the last full moon I am going to be able to leave Allison alone for a while, so we need to run through it." Everyone agreed. After breakfast everyone cleaned up, Lydia and Jackson peeled off to practice reaching the Kanima.
After walking in a comfortable silence for a while, close enough for their shoulders occasionally brush, looking to Jackson, Lydia suddenly starts to giggle. "What?" He asks.
"Nothing," she giggles again.
"What?"
"It's just, look at us, we are actually getting along and I don't think that has ever happened in the history of our relationship," He considered her comment for a moment and then chuckled with her, shifting the gym bag she had insisted he carry with them. "Yeah, I guess it only took supernatural transitions and you kidnapping my niece to make us stop fighting."
"Okay, I think we are far enough," she says as they reach a pretty little clearing in the trees.
"So you think you can make this work?" Jackson asks suspicious as he drops the bag.
"Yeah, but you are going to have to trust me, okay." He reluctantly nods, "I think that this hasn't been working because you don't want to go to the place that you were at when you were the Kanima. That is not a judgment, because I get it, I don't want to go back to when I was being controlled by Peter but you have to remember that I am never going to let someone else control you again, I will never use you like Matt did. I love you and I hate that you have to do this, but it is the only way we can protect this pack and Isabel."
Looking into Lydia's eyes, Jackson recognized her sincerity and her desperation to protect their family. Taking a deep breath, Jackson took her hand, "Your right, I have been holding back because not knowing what I am doing, not having control, and having to live with the guilt of what I did as the Kanima is so hard that it smothers me sometimes. I wake up in the middle of the night sweating and crying because I hear the cries of the people I killed, I hear them begging, but I don't remember the crime itself." Tears begin to spill over his eyes, "God, how am I supposed to explain to Isabel one day that I murdered her father?"
"Jackson, listen to me, you did not murder anyone. You were used as a weapon without your consent or control. Matt murdered Isabel's father, but you, you saved Isabel and you tried to save Jessica. Now, you are going to be the best uncle ever to her and you are going to protect her always. That is what I will tell my daughter about you, do you understand me." Nodding, he wiped his eyes, "Okay. Lydia you know me better than anyone else in the world and even though I was an asshole to you most of our relationship, I really do love you. You are the best friend I have. I trust you and I know that you will make sure I don't do anything that I should feel guilty for. "
"Good. Now I am going to try to connect to you the way I do with Scott. I think that finding the balance between the part of you that is a werewolf and the part of you that was the Kanima is the key to controlling the shift." Placing her hands on his temples, she nodded for Jackson to do the same, "Okay, now just focus on breathing, try to align your breathing with mine okay. Just slowly, in and out, in and out," She opened her eyes as she heard him snicker. "What?" Her irritation evident.
"Just thinking about the last time you said those words," He smirked.
"Jackson Whittimore, don't make me kick your ass," she threatens.
"I'd like to see you try Lydia Martin," He dove at her, tackling her to the ground and tickling her viscously. Lydia cried out in shock and tried to fight back before suddenly pushing Jackson off of her. He thought she was playing for a moment before she hit him with enough force to knock him off of her and scurried into the bushes just in time to empty the contents of her stomach onto the leaves. "Uh," she whined as a second wave of nausea hit and she heaved some more—damn pancakes. Finally feeling like she was finished, she rocked back to sit in her heels, wiping her mouth and catching her breath before turning to face Jackson.
"Oh shit," he muttered, his face pale and his mouth agape, "You're pregnant."
"Jackson," Lydia started tiredly.
"Jackson, what? The big bad Alpha put a baby in you and what, you're happy about it?" His voice was thick with indignation, she sighed and just let him continue his rant, "Lydia, are you fucking crazy? You are sixteen and you are going to have his kid. He is a fugitive and this is statutory rape."
"Jackson I already have a kid, in fact I have two, Derek is my husband and you didn't seem to have a problem with Scott and Allison having a kid." She interjects.
"Scott and Allison and not you Lydia!"
"What is the difference?" Lydia threw her hands in the air.
"You are the smartest person I know, you are suppose to win the fucking Field medal and write ridiculous math stuff that no one cares about. You are not supposed to be the breading mare for a werewolf pack!"
"Don't you dare tell me about what I am supposed to be or how smart I am! I dated you for two years and you taught me that I needed to be dumb and pretty if I was going to be treated well! Do not judge me! All of that—the Field medal and the PhD and hell graduating from high school—all of that changed when Peter Hale attacked me on that field. He didn't kill me, but he sure as hell ended the life of Lydia Martin. Now seven months later I am not that girl. Yes, I am pregnant, and no, I didn't plan on getting pregnant for a long time, but that does not mean that I don't love my son just as much as I love the two children that I already have." She yelled back, slowly walking towards him, "I am already a mom, this doesn't change anything, and by the way, my name is Lydia Hale," With that declaration she grabbed his temples and forced her way into his mind, using his anger as a doorway into his subconscious. Last night, Lydia realized that Jackson's driving force, as the Kanima and as a person, had always been anger. It was his weakness and when he was the angriest, he was the most venerable. Finding the same train of energy that she usually used to push the wolves, she reversed it, pushing it as hard as she could toward an energy that she did not recognize. Suddenly she felt a release, opening her eyes she was met with a reptilian yellow stare. It worked.
Releasing his head, Lydia slowly stepped back from Jackson as he leaned in closer to smell her. She held very still, not wanting to spook him. He hissed at her for a moment and then she held her hand up to him. Tilting his head in a very reptilian way, he responded, holding his clawed hand up, pressing his palm into hers. Seeing the gel like venom dripping from his claws, Lydia had a moment of panic. Taking a cleansing breathe, she closed her eyes and pushed Jackson back. After a lot of focus, she felt Jackson's warm breath on her face, panting as he shifted back.
Opening her eyes she was relieved to see his blue eyes staring back. "Oh thank God, it worked." She panted, hugging him to her. He hugged her back with both desperation and relief, "It worked, but you pulled me back and I was conscious of myself."
"Really, like you were aware of what was going on?"
Blinking heavily, he swallowed thickly and then nodded, "Yeah, I could still feel and see, just like when I am in wolf form."
"Do you want to try it again?" She asked, not wanting to push him to far too fast. "Um okay," he nodded; Lydia raised her hands to his temples again and pushed him. Opening her eyes, she saw Jackson in Kanima form, "Okay, Jackson, can you hear me?" He nodded, unable to respond verbally without hissing. "Good, now can you control your movements?"
Quirking his head, he took a step back and bounded up a tree, climbing it with his claws. Jumping between trees for a few minutes, Jackson tested his control and speed. Suddenly, he took off for the rapids out front. Huffing, Lydia grabbed the gym bag and hurried after him, "Great, that is exactly what my pregnant ass needs to be doing, chasing after you into the woods. Jackson it is getting cold!" She shouted after him.
Once she finally caught up to him, she found him frolicking in the rapids, jumping and slashing joyously. "What the holy hell are you doing?" She huffed, dropping the heavy bag. Jackson made his way out of the water smiling in his reptilian form; Lydia pushed him back to human form, fixing him with an annoyed stare.
"I," he shook his wet hair, "Am enjoying the water without getting cold." He laughed. When Lydia quirked her eyebrow, he added, "Matt was scared of the water so I couldn't get in the water when he was controlling me, now I can and it is awesome!" He grabbed her, spinning her in a circle as he hugged her.
"Jackson, Jackson, stop." She pushed at his shoulders, "Jackson don't make me puke again." Hearing the tinge of desperation; Jackson stopped spinning, placing Lydia back on her feet. "Thanks, she looked down, trying to settle her stomach, realizing that Jackson was naked, she quickly looked back up, "You may want to stop hugging me naked or the others may start talking." She smirked.
"What, it's nothing you haven't seen before and I seem to remember you liking my naked hugs before." He answered in his typical cocky tone, leaning in, he whispered, "Or are you scared that the Alpha is going to get jealous?"
Smirking right back, she answered, "Oh he knows I am not going anywhere, I mean, why would I leave all of that and you cannot imagine the things that he can do with his tongue." Rolling his eyes, Jackson smiled as she leaned over and unzipped the bag, "Here," she handed him a pair of jeans and a hoodie, "I thought you might need these." Smiling, Jackson took the offered clothes, "Thanks Mom."
"Shut up," she said exasperated. After Jackson was dressed they started back to the house, "So, son uh?"
Looking up at him, she smiled, "Yeah, according to Jade anyway, she is convinced that she is getting a little brother. Jackson," She sighed, wrapping her arms around her middle, "I don't want anyone else to know about this just yet okay." She stopped turning to him as the sun began to get lower in the sky, "I already almost lost this baby once, and I just don't trust anyone else enough to know about him just yet. I have to keep him safe and I don't know that I trust the other packs." Nodding he hugs her to him, "Who else knows? Besides Jade?"
"Right now just you and Scott and of course Derek. Scott only knows because he saw it in my head and Jade has been talking about him since before I knew for sure that he was still in there."
"How far along are you?"
"About 11 weeks,"
"So, when Gerard," he tapered off as she nodded.
"If you listen closely, you can hear him," she stated as if it was an invitation. Jackson tilted his head, after a moment, he whispered, "Yeah, I can hear him." His voice awed.
"I guess it is real then? You are married and a mom and shit."
Chuckling at his wording, she pressed her forehead to his chest, "Yeah," she whispered, realizing that he was saying goodbye to who they had been. More than anyone maybe, Jackson had given up his entire self—first as the Kanima and then to find his place in the pack while trying to heal from the damage done to his psyche by Matt. He was never going to be the star Lacrosse player with perfect hair ever again. After a few moments, he kissed her hair and released her. Taking her hand, he walked them the rest of the way to the house, resigned to their new roles.