Author's Note: Writing has been tough my lovely readers. School is such an ass right?

"Oh I was thinking about killing myself, don't you mind

I love you, don't you mind don't you mind"

The 1975- Me

"You went to see Astoria today?" he asked suddenly. I tucked back my shoulders and stepped off of the landing of the steps, walking into the living room past Draco and folding my arms.

"Yes," I said. The hour had passed and I had to face my love. It was horrifying, knowing that this was like an organized fight. We hadn't quite fought before, at least not about anything that wasn't ultimately fixed. Maybe this would be the same.

He turned around to face me. "And you didn't think that was something worth discussing with me?"

"No," I spat, almost menacingly, regretting ever agreeing to this. What did fighting ever solve?

Draco spun around with a hand on his head saying, "And-why the hell not? She and I were in a relationship for years. You didn't think maybe I would have a problem with you going to see her?"

He was being irrational. "I didn't realize you controlled what I did in my working life. I was under the assumption that I could do and go anywhere I wanted, talking with anyone I wanted," I retorted. We were far from each other but his reactions were clear and his stance was unlike the new him, more like the old. He looked like an old man, anger didn't suit him.

He crossed his arms over his chest, pressing into his fitted tee. "What if I went up to one of your ex-boyfriends behind your back and just, I don't know, started asking them about you. Asked them all of the dirty secrets that I didn't know fro-"

"Are you kidding me?" I interjected, my voice raised. "You honestly think I would do something like that? We didn't talk about some 'dirty secret' that you had kept from me! I spoke to her as a friend. That's it."

"You and Astoria are not friends," he spat. "She is wicked."

I sighed. "She is damaged-"

"You don't know her! I do! What right do you have t-"

"What right!" I yelled, now furious with him. It didn't take much to set me off but he was hitting my buttons. I had a right to do whatever the hell I wanted. "What right do you have to not tell me about your house? You finished it and you didn't tell me?"

Draco took a turn sighing, running a hand through his hair. "Well, it you want to take it there…" I snorted in between his softer words, "It wasn't the right time. Potter has no idea what he's talking about. It's...complicated in the least."

"Really? Because Harry said the house was completely rebuilt. Guess what Draco? That's flippin' fantastic. I'm proud of you. You did it. Now you can move out. Was that the goal?"

His face was livid. "You think I want to move out? Really!" Draco had moved closer to me, now looming over as if he were staring at his prey. I shriveled back a few steps, suddenly frightened of the beautiful man in front of me. He noticed my trepidation and stepped back, holding his hands in front of him. Lowering his voice by just a few notches, "I didn't build the house to move out. I thought you wanted me to do it. I had figured you would be proud of me for doing what I had set out to do."

I looked away from his stormy eyes to the floor, crossing my arms in front of me. "I a-"

"Look at me when you're talking," he growled. I peered up, a shiver going down my spine from his words. His voice had been low and demanding. I didn't want to admit it but it had turned me on. It wasn't supposed to, I didn't want it to distract me. So I just looked at him, finding an out, like we had done so long ago.

"I am proud, Draco. I'm happy for you. Your life is moving forward and I am proud."

He stared at me with an odd curiosity. "This isn't about the house is it?" he said.

"Wh-what?" I sputtered, thoroughly confused.

Draco smirked and backed away from me, pacing around the room as he went. He was laughing, just enough to be audible.

"What the hell, Draco?" I said.

"It's not about any of this," he said. "Of course it isn't. You don't care what I have to say about Astoria and I don't care what you have to say about my house. It's not about any of this. It's about you."

I'll admit...his words stung like alcohol in a wound. It hadn't taken much to send me spiraling, evaluating just what he had said. "What are you-"

"Oh come on, love. It's obvious." He said it like it was too. Like I was missing something in the grand scheme of all that was holy.

"Draco, stop fucking around. What are you talking about?" I spat.

His smirk dropped and he said, "It's not about any of that. Don't you see? Mione, this is all petty, I admit it. I brought it up and I'm sorry. But, you have to see what this is about." When I didn't answer him he sighed and continued. "It's about you and the war."

"How?" I asked. "The war is done, I've...moved on." And I knew. It was a lie to myself of course but he noticed. Fuck, did everyone know things about myself that I didn't?

"Hermione, what aren't you telling me?" he asked. I glared at him, searching his face. "I told my life to you, Granger. The least you could do is give me what I need to know to understand what's bothering you because something is stewing inside of that pretty head of yours and I need to know."

Damn him. Damn him and his freaky ability to see right through me. He thought his life had been bad. He thought I wasn't crazy, I would never be Astoria right? Maybe not now no. He wanted to know, yeah right. Not even my friends knew. No one.

"You don't want to know. Trust me," I tried.

Draco started shaking his head, never taking his eyes off of me. His damn eyes and the way they stole my heart, stole my life. "Come sit across from me," he said.

"Why?" I asked, somewhat stupidly when I thought back.

He smirked and said, "I'm going to distract you."

I smiled softly, my head going crazy with thoughts of him and his eyes and what I would reveal. What could I reveal? I stood, my heart pulsing in my fingertips and head. I quietly sat in front of Draco. We weren't yelling anymore, just two people speaking to one another. He took my hands in his and put his forehead nearly against mine, looking into my eyes. "Don't look away," he said. "Tell me what you can. I'm here and I'm not leaving you."

I inhaled deeply, breathing in his scent and the distant space between us; even though we were touching, practically in each others laps, it felt like lightyears away.

"I know you won't, but please don't judge what I did in the past."

"Never," he said. "You're safe."

I just wanted to kiss him, be in his arms fully like I had wanted all day. Nothing was close enough. "Draco," I started, "the war was...more than just a war for me. You know what I'm talking about. I didn't just pick up where I left off. My world has been altered since that asshole decided I was better off dead." I sighed, attempting to look away from Draco yet captured by his eyes.

"My experience was similar to yours honestly. My parents were killed by Death Eaters immediately in the aftermath of the war. They were in Australia...the fucking Death Eaters found them again before I could. They died never knowing I existed."

Draco's eyes were filled with sorrow. I understood why. We had all lost someone in the war, sometimes many people. But, at least the people Draco lost had remembered who he was.

"So that was alright. In the end I realized they knew that I was their daughter for most of my life. I could deal with their deaths well enough, and I did for a long time. Until the first year anniversary…"

Draco nodded slightly in understanding. He was there that night, hiding in the back but he was there. I had been given an award for my service. For my life. For my victory over death.

"I shouldn't have made it out of there. They stepped in front of me. In FRONT of me. They chose to take the fire instead of me dying. And why? Because I'm Hermione fucking Granger and everyone needs to preserve the Gryffindor Princess." Icy eyes stared into me, not saying a word. I was practically in shambles. "They rewarded me for being pushed out of the line of fire by an innocent who was barely old enough to take their OWLs. That's not a prize."

I swallowed hard. Draco's hand rubbed against my leg, his fingers moving in circles. "So I did it. I stuck a wand to my temple that night and said a curse I'm not proud of. It obviously didn't work the way I intended it to."

Draco was on the verge of tears from what I could see. I didn't feel the pain he felt. I was already content with my attempts of death. It was in the past. But Draco was the first person I had told about that; I couldn't imagine why he wouldn't be upset.

"It killed me more than any curse to know that I had made it out alive more than once. So, I decided to put up those pictures to torture myself. I had to face them everyday, including the one who had stepped in front of me. Poor girl…" I drawled off. "For almost a year after the war I didn't see anyone, working at home and refusing to see my friends. Guess that's why they're always so intent on being around me. Draco it's hard to do this. I've been on the edge of a panic attack for five years now."

"You'll be alright, Hermione," he said for the first time.

I looked into his eyes, deeper than I already had, actually looking further than just their color and the shade they were. He was thinking intently, searching me for any doubt of what I had said. It was all true though. Down to the last word.

"I'm alright with you. As soon as you showed up...the panic was gone. I didn't feel like I had to worry about whether I was going to break or not. You just...cured me."

Draco leaned forward, closing the gap between us, and kissed my lips. It was a chaste kiss, but the meaning was pure and simplistic. It was beautiful.

He leaned back again after a moment of bliss saying, "You're spectacular. Just promise me you'll never try that again."

"Same goes for you," I said with a small smile that really should have been a grimace. It was sad to smile about what we had both done, around the same time as well. Obviously it was meant to be though. He was still here. We were alive. Alive and…

"Draco," I said suddenly.

"Yes, Hermione?" His voice was soft for some reason; a fleeting moment that would have been broken if he spoke too loudly.

He was it. I knew then.

"Astoria knew before I did," I said, in a way, only to myself.

"What did she know?" Draco asked as if it was obvious.

I smiled. "She knew that I am deeply, and endlessly in love with you."

Draco didn't say a word. He looked away in fact. He shut his eyes and his forehead collided with mine in a small bump. Through his nose he inhaled three times, slowly taking in breath that calmed him and horrified me. I was tempted to ask if he had heard me. Tempted to ask if I should repeat just how much I cared for him.

I didn't need to though. "Hermione Granger," he said. "I love you. And I have loved you for more time than you know."

It was simple and not a notch above how he had spoken before. But, he was in love with me and everything was complete.

Author's Note: Please review, follow, favorite!

Also! NEWS: I just posted a (currently) one shot that is pure smut Dramione. It's called Take Me and I would love if you all checked it out. Warning though for some of you who are not into this...there is a bit of femslash in the chapter so beware if you prefer to not read that. Otherwise, get horny and read some of my smut ;)

Love to you all and Happy Labor Day to my American readers!