Chapter Thirty-Six: "Pick Up the Pieces"

"Mom, I'm fine!" I moaned into my phone. "My god! It was just a little vodka!"

"Just a little vodka can make you lose your scholarships, Isabella Marie!" she shouted at me. "We can't afford to actually pay for your college!"

"I know! Goddamnit! Here's what I have to do. I'll go before the residence board, give them letters of praise from my professors, and they'll pardon me. It's no big deal."

"Don't curse at me," she growled. "And if you don't have this mess cleaned up soon, I'm coming up there to drag your drunk little butt home. You can work at the diner!"

I sighed. "Mom, don't be irrational. This happens all the time."

"Were there drugs in your dorm?" she asked me quietly.

"No," I lied.

"Thank God," she breathed. "Isabella, what has happened to you? You used to be such a good girl."

"I grew up," I snapped. "I'm just trying to have some fun, Mom."

"And fun in college is good, but this could alter your life for the worse!"

"I know," I said. "I have my life under control. Get off my back."

"Do you have your drinking under control?"

"What the hell? Of course I do! I'm not a freaking alcoholic, Mom!"

She sighed, and it sounded like she was crying. "Isabella...please come home."

"No," I said. "I'm not running away from my problems."

"I guess you're right," she whispered.

"I know I am."

"I just..." She was openly crying now. "Why do I get the feeling that all of this is a reaction to your breakup with Edward?"

I inhaled sharply. That felt like a kick to the gut. "Mom...for your information, I didn't start drinking until I started hanging out with him and his crowd. How do you feel about him now?"

"Well, even so..." She sniffled. "At least he made sure you were taken care of. That you did things in moderation. He and I talked about this when you guys came to Forks. He loves you so much, Isabella. He thought that protecting you was his job. He told me he loved to take care of you and pamper you and-"

"Mom," I said in a strained voice, trying to control myself. "It's over."

"Isabella, that kind of love doesn't just end."

I scowled. "Mom, you're not making me feel any better. Keep your nose out of my life, for the millionth time! I'm going to fix my mistakes, okay? I won't lose my scholarships." I hope.

"Fine, baby, just fine. Call me when you decide to respect me and my wishes for your life."

She hung up.

"Oh my god," I groaned.

"Your mother sounds like a bitch," Jessica called from the bathroom.

Thanks for eavesdropping.

I sighed. "She really isn't, Jess. I owe her much more respect. It's just...my life is falling apart!"

"Yeah," she said. "I've heard."

I rolled my eyes and reread the letter from the board of residency. Stephenie had reported me, and now I had a series of steps to go through.

"Time to start picking up the pieces," I grumbled to myself.

Well, it wasn't as easy as I thought. I needed a letter of recommendation from a professor, and that was damn hard to find. My grades had slipped recently, and I basically got a big fat NO from all of my professors. I actually found myself pining for the ease of my former relationship with Carlisle. One quick fuck for a good letter?

Done.

Not that I would ever go back to Carlisle. My dealings with the Cullen family were over.

Well...not exactly. A few days after I tried (and failed) to convince my professors to write me letters, I went home to my dorm to find Emmett standing at the entrance. He grinned and lifted me into a hug as soon as he saw me.

"Hey, Izzy! I was lookin' for a girl with a key!"

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, right. You were looking for me."

He beamed as I swiped my keycard and opened the door. We walked into the lobby together. "Okay, so maybe you're right," he said. "But I have an invitation."

"Oh?" I tried to sound indifferent. "Does it involve trying to hook me up with my hostile ex-boyfriend?"

"Definitely not," he promised. "But you should know that he'll be there."

I sighed. "Emmett, what is it?"

He started talking very fast. "It's my graduation, Bella. You're like my little sister and I want you to be there so badly. You can sit with Rose and Jasper's family, so you won't have to talk to Edward. And you can come to my party that Mom is throwing...but you don't have to."

I sighed. I had to admit that I wanted to support Emmett at his graduation. It was a big step in his life, and I was familiar with the steps he had taken to get there. Plus I had tutored him in Spanish. I knew he passed the class with an A. I should go to his graduation, I told myself. But I should also stay away from Edward...and Carlisle.

Well, I knew one thing for sure: the party was a no-go. That was okay. I couldn't handle the memories of an Esme Cullen party even if Edward and Carlisle were conspicuously absent.

"I don't know, Em," I said. "Let me think about it."

"Please, please, please keep an open mind," he told me.

"I'll try."

"Thank you, Bells!" He suddenly picked me up and spun me around, earning an adoring smirk from the girl who was exiting the dormitory. Obviously she recognized the Grizzly.

"I haven't said yes yet," I muttered to him.

He set me on my feet and kissed the top of my head. "You don't have to. I know you'll come."

"Cocky bast-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," he rolled his eyes. "Hey, a little birdy told me you got busted."

I groaned. "Does everyone on campus know?"

"No," he said. "I heard it from Alice, who heard it from Rosalie, who said she heard it from you."

"Alice?" I asked, my voice cracking a bit.

"Yeah," he said. "Allie misses you, too. She's just too busy with work and school to come meddle like Rose did."

My silence was thick; finally he admitted, "We're all pissed at Edward. Even my mom."

I sighed, thinking of Esme. She had told me she loved me as a daughter. Did she still feel that way?

No. I had to change the subject. "So what do you think about me getting busted? Pretty badass, huh?"

He snorted. "Not quite. I've been there and done that, Izzy. It wasn't fun. I was just grateful they found my liquor and not my pot."

"Same here," I admitted.

"Getting the letters of reccomendation was the worst part," he continued. "Have you gotten yours yet?"

I shook my head. "I'm not the teacher's pet this semester."

"Maybe you could get my dad to write you one."

That felt like a blow to my head. "Uhhh..."

"Aw, come on, Bells. Dad doesn't hate you because Edward dumped you. He probably misses you."

I could hear my ears ringing. "I don't think so, Emmett."

"He would probably do it," Emmett argued.

I sighed and decided to change the subject. "Well, I'll let you know if I come to your graduation. I have to go study now."

He gave me a sad smile. "Okay, Bells. Don't be a stranger. Call me or Rose and we'll hang out."

"I will," I promised him.

I groaned in the elevator as I rode up to my floor. Leave it to the Cullens to make a repeat visit in my life.

Zafrina was in our room when I unlocked the door. She turned to me with sympathetic eyes. "Hey, Isabella," she said softly. "How are you?"

"I'm okay," I replied. "Did you talk to the board of residency?"

She nodded. "I feel really guilty...why didn't you let me tell them that we shared the vodka?"

"Because it's a lie," I told her.

"But I bought it for you-"

"And I paid you back," I told her. "So technically it's my purchase. 'Frina, I'm not going to let you take the fall for my mistakes. It was my vodka under my bed. You shouldn't get in trouble for it. Did the board believe you when you said it wasn't yours?"

"Yeah," she said. "When Stephenie said it was under your bed, that kind of sealed the deal. Plus I had a nice letter from my sociology professor. When are you going before the board?"

"I'm scheduled to do it the day after graduation," I replied. "That gives me a week."

"Do you have any graduates to celebrate with?"

I sighed. "I don't know."


After four days of mulling over graduation, I finally decided that damn it, I loved Emmett, too; and I would go support him no matter what. If his brother or his father had anything to say about it, they could just kiss my ass.

I yanked on a navy blue summer dress and heels. I took extra care to do my makeup and hair. If Edward Cullen was going to see me, then I was going to look good. I would let him know what he gave up.

Graduation was held in the basketball arena since the Phoenix sun was so hot. Emmett had told me what row his family would take up, so I went straight there. I wanted him to see me. Of course Carlisle had reserved the row with the best view. I nervously walked in the general direction of that row, scanning the crowd for any familiar faces. I noticed some guys I recognized from Delta Kappa Epsilon, and decided to follow them.

And then I heard a shriek.

I turned around to see Alice run toward me, darting between people in her stilettos. She suddenly crushed me in a hug, planting kisses all over my face. "Bella!" she squealed. "I knew You would come!"

"Long time, no see," I said a bit awkwardly. "How are you?"

"Better, now that I've seen you." She pulled back and examined my outfit. "I see my fashion influence has stood the test of time. You look fabulous."

"Thank you," I said. "How is the job going?"

"My designs are selling like crazy," she beamed.

I hugged her tight. "I knew they would!"

I heard another squeal behind us, and we turned to see Esme. She instantly enveloped me in a warm hug and kissed my cheek. "Are you back, sweet Bella?"

I cleared my throat awkwardly. "I came to support Emmett."

She sighed sadly. "I'm going to have a talk with Edward Anthony as soon as Emmett accepts his diploma."

"Esme, I really appreciate it, but-"

"Hush your mouth," Alice said. "I want you back, too. And Mom is a force to be reckoned with."

I sighed. Suddenly we heard music start to play, so we rushed to our seats.

The seating went like this: Rosalie, me, Alice, Jasper, Esme, Mr. and Mrs. Hale, Carlisle, and a very pretty thirty-something woman. Carlisle had a hand on her thigh, so I guessed they were together. Well, good for him, I thought. Nobody deserved to be alone.

There was one person conspicuously absent, though.

I tried not to stare at the empty chair as the pasty old speaker began his speech, but I kept wondering, Where is Edward?

Finally, the auburn-haired god came to the seat beside Carlisle's girlfriend. He looked a bit disgusted at his father, so he looked to his mom for help. Esme rushed everyone down a seat so he could sit by her. I was a mere four seats away from him.

He wore a tan blazer over a white button-down. He looked perfect, of course, even though he had dark circles under his eyes, he obviously hadn't shaved in a while, and his hairstyle had seen better days. I Blushed deeply and quickly looked away when his beautiful eyes met mine. They widened in surprise at my presence, and I expected him to get up and leave. But he behaved himself, looking instead at the stage.

That only lasted for a minute, though. After that, he began to stare at me in a way that made me suspicious.

Still, I maintained my pokerface and watched the speakers.

Finally, they began to hand out diplomas. Luckily it was a small university, and since Emmett's last name was early in the alphabet, it didn't take long. He looked huge in his gaudy gown as he accepted his diploma rather gracefully. We were all surprised at his politeness, but at the end of the stage, he suddenly pounded his chest and let out a whoop. Everyone laughed, and some yelled out, "Go, Grizzly!" Of course our row went wild. The announcer actually had to ask, "Mr. Cullen, would you contain yourself and your fanbase?" Of course everyone laughed some more, but we settled down. I noticed Esme yanked Edward down to her level and started whispering furiously in his ear. Of course I blushed. Jasper noticed, and he winked at me with a grin. He knew what was going on.

After what felt like an eternity, the ceremony was over. Everyone ran down to the graduates, except me, Alice, and Jasper, who hadn't given me a hug. He lifted me up into a tight embrace. He and Alice invited me to the party, but I lied and said I had other plans. Alice looked devastated.

We made our way down to the floor. Emmett gave me a hug and a kiss on my cheek and thanked me for coming. I absentmindedly gave him my congratulations, really only wondering where Edward had gotten off to.

He was absent again.

I hugged everyone-minus Carlisle and his lady-and promised Alice that we would hang out soon. I tried not to cry as I left the stadium. I really missed that family. I couldn't deny that.

I had just walked from my dorm, so I started my trek down the sidewalk. Nobody even noticed me, even though I recognized many Phi Mu and Delta Kappas. I guess I'm just out of the circle...

These were my thoughts until I heard a familiar voice call my name.

"Isabella!"

You're dreaming, I told myself. You need a drink.

"Isabella!"

I kept walking.

Finally, the voice, tired and weak, called out, "Bella, baby, stop walking away from me. I can't stand to see that sight anymore."

I gasped and turned on my heel.

There stood the disheveled Edward Cullen, out of breath from running to find me.

I crossed my arms. "What?"

Reviews have dwindled so much. I'd love to hear from y'all. Two more chapters, and then it's done.