A/N: Our humblest apologies for the long delay in this new chapter.

We've almost come to the end of this journey, so we're hoping you'll stay til the end.

Thank you to all who have stayed with us and even those who've just stopped in for a quick look.

A very special thank you goes out to our wonderful reviewers! You're the best!

"Any more monsters hiding in your closet?" ..."Timmy, what is it?"
"I guess it just hit me that none of this...any of it, would have happened if I'd just told someone."
"Timmy, you didn't think you could tell anyone. We understand that. No one's blaming you."
"You're missing the point, Abby. NONE of this would have happened!"

Tim sat looking at the water and with every ripple of the soft waves, came a new thought that stirred deep in his gut. From as far back as he could remember, he had taken the beatings and accepted them as the norm but now; thanks to the unwavering support and love from his team; his extended family, he knew how wrong he was to accept that twisted reality. The old man had died of a heart attack finally ending the abuse...but was it over? The fact that the dragon that had haunted his childhood had died only when Tim'd finally fought back was creating a hidden pocket of guilt and uncertainty about it all that Abby's innocent question had ripped open.

Why do I feel guilty? Do I really think I could have changed things by saying something sooner to someone? Who did I have to trust in that I could have talked to about it? Why can't I shake this feeling that I could have stopped this nightmare a hell of a long time ago? Why can't I shake the feeling that he's always going to be there in the background dictating my thoughts and turning me into someone like him. My actions...my damn spur-of-the-moment actions have sent this spiralling out of control again and I need...

"Damn it! What do I need to do to put this away for good?" He questioned out loud and shook his head when the only answer was the gentle lapping against the bank and the sound of small boats travelling across the water. Today was quiet, but given the time, that was normal. Most people were in the office or out right about now and his favourite spot was secluded and serene, which was exactly why he loved it in the first place. He sat back and looked around, taking in the clear blue sky and the birds flying high above him before drawing his gaze downwards to once again look at the river.

It wasn't hard to find Tim. Knowing him pretty damn well by now, Gibbs knew right where to look for him and after having a quick chat with Tony, had him in his sights within fifteen minutes of hearing from Abby what had happened between the two of them in her lab. Seeing that the young man was, lost in his thoughts, Gibbs sat down and handed him a coffee before leaning forward and doing exactly what Tim had been doing a moment before.

I'm sorry." Tim's apology was quiet, but not really un-expected after what had happened.

Gibbs shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly and nodded before looking at Tim."For what?" the boss asked, wanting to hear the reason's from his agent himself.

"Just taking off like that."

"Understandable. Talked to Abby."

"I figured as much. What happened wasn't her fault. Not that you'd blame her, but..." Tim tried to explain, but the words failed him right at the end. He sipped his coffee and went back to gazing over the water.

"But she does, Yeah, I get it. Not blaming anyone here, Tim. Talk to me."

"It just hit me, Boss. Every single piece of this, the past six years of this hell, could have been avoided, if I'd just said something! He didn't have to die like that! You know, Its my fault that he did because I never said anything to anyone! Never said a damn word! " Tim cried out as he jumped up off the bench and began to pace agitatedly.

Tim was angry and Gibbs knew that the anger being given an outlet was good. The younger man would get out what he was thinking and go back to rationalizing everything once again. What the boss didn't like was the fact that Tim's anger was aimed at himself and that anger seemed so deep-rooted, that his agent was practically vibrating with every step. It was time to rein it in before it spiralled out of control and took all the progress Tim had made in taking control of his life, away from him.

"McGee!" Gibbs barked so he could at least get the kid to stop long enough to listen to him.

Sure enough, the boss' tone stopped Tim in mid-stride, his eyes flying to Gibbs' clear blue ones. The boss saw the anger abate slightly and knew that what his agent had heard, was anger in his tone and was now gazing at him, waiting for the axe to fall.

"Sit!"

Tim sat down and closed his eyes in frustration at letting his anger get the better of him. He hated this. Hated the fact that he had the same sinking feeling that he got whenever he was summoned home and that his head, was now on the chopping block.

Gibbs must have seen something there, because he shifted round slightly to look at his agent better. "McGee, look at me!" The boss snapped out with a cold, angry tone that let Tim know that he was pissed at where the younger man's focus had nose-dived to.

Tim did as he was told and looked over at Gibbs, squinting against the sun that shone from over Gibbs' shoulder. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust and Gibbs' face came into view slowly. Tim held his boss' gaze and waited patiently to see where this was going.

"Didn't you just get done telling Tony yesterday that even if you had thought we would have listened to you, you probably wouldn't have said anything? You'd trained yourself to keep your mouth shut to protect your mother and your sister and even yourself so, that you didn't even know how to handle it differently, isn't that what you told Tony?" Gibbs demanded, though his tone has softened slightly.

"Yes." Tim answered in shock. He was surprised that Tony would have shared that with Gibbs or that Gibbs would have listened given the fact that Tim didn't think he'd want to hear it.

"Did we make it easy for you to think any different; for you to realize you could talk to us?" the boss demanded.

"No."

"Then explain to me how what you lived through and the way it ended for both of you, was your fault!" Gibbs demanded angrily.

Thrown for a loop by the boss' anger and his words, Tim could only think to say one thing. "I guess it's not."

"Damn right, it's not! That bastard's death was not your fault. I won't let you take the blame for any of it! You hearin' me?"

"I'm sorry." Tim answered softly as it dawned on him that Gibbs anger was a tactic that made him think about the way he was feeling and draw his true feelings out.

"What else is going through that head of yours?"

He started to get lost in his thoughts once again when a hand startled him out of reverie. He turned. "Boss?"

"McGee. You alright?" There was no insinuation; no harsh tones, there was just his boss talking with him to see how he was doing.

"I'm good, Boss." Tim replied automatically and cringed as Gibbs' hand connected with the back of his head.

"Try again." Gibbs purposely kept his answers short and succinct, wanting Tim to open up to him without being prompted. It was something he'd have to learn again and if he was going to do it, then Gibbs was going to make damn sure that he'd help along the way.

"Okay. No! I'm not alright. You're right, there is more. You know, when Abby asked me if there were any more monsters hiding in my closet I realized that if I'd only said something earlier...acted on stuff, then none of this would have happened! I wouldn't have gone to prison, you wouldn't have had to bail me out and I WOULDN'T STILL BE SO PISSED RIGHT NOW!"

The yell at the end of the sentence wasn't filled with so much passionate anger that even the hardened Gibbs found it difficult not to flinch slightly. "I let him run my damn life and I'm worried that I'm gonna be like him! I can't live like this, Boss, I can't live knowing that I had a hand in hurting my family even more because that bastard couldn't just walk away from kids he didn't want to have to raise. He was always so quick to raise his hands or something else... What if...?" Tim trailed off thinking back the one person he wanted to be with at the moment and started to get bogged down in his self recriminations and doubts about how he could even start a relationship with her or if he even had the right to ask.

"Not a basket case and fear is a funny thing, McGee. That man was a bully and no matter what, what he did to you and your family; he was wrong. And he was wrong about you." Tim turned and looked at his boss with absolute disbelief in his eyes.

"You think so, huh? You think I'm not like him. Come on, Boss, the apple can't have fallen that far away from the damn tree right? Why'd I let it go on for so long? I could have stopped it! I could have told someone but no! I chose to not look harder for someone I could talk to. I chose to carry on being pushed around by that dragon and...and..." Tim trailed off again and turned back to the water. The vehemence in his voice seemed to have faded with his anger and right now, all Gibbs saw was a broken, thoughtful young man.

"And what? McGee, what you gotta realize here is that people like that have a hold on ya. Have you forgotten that you don't have to worry about being the apple from that tree to begin with? Besides, you're polite to a fault and I'm not afraid to tell ya that it didn't come from anything you learned from that man. You did what you had to do to keep people safe. You survived everything and worked through it. That took strength and fortitude most people only dream of having, McGee."

"I was wrong." Tim admitted with a whisper and tried to muster up the strength not to crumble. He would not crumble in front of Gibbs!

"Yeah. You were."

Tim looked at Gibbs with amazement and shook his head. "What?"

"You should have come to me, McGee. That's where you went wrong. You should have spoken to me years ago, but you didn't...didn't realize that you could, I get that now. But, now you know better." Gibbs sipped at his coffee and huffed out a short laugh. "So, don't ever bottle up your feelings like that again! You got me?"

Tim nodded and knew that Gibbs was right in what he was saying. "Gotcha Boss."

"Okay. Now you wanna tell me what the hell this is about. Abby doesn't think before opening her mouth, but you shot outta there like a bat out of hell."

Tim's mouth quirked into a small smile. "Out of the Gothic bat cave huh?"

Gibbs chuckled at that comment and shook his head.

"I dunno, Boss. I guess I panicked when my thoughts took over and the walls started to close in. I had to get out."

"You feel better now?"

"Yeah. Thanks Boss." Tim nodded and started to drink his coffee only to be surprised at the sweet taste that met him. "Um...tea?"

Gibbs smiled once again and stood up. "Yup, decaffeinated . Caffeine wouldn't be a good idea right now and I know ya can tolerate the stuff...Oh, and McGee?"

Tim looked up at him and waited for Gibbs to finish saying what he wanted to. He felt the headslap, right before the Boss bent down low to whisper in his ear. "You. Are. Nothing. Like. Him! Remember that!"

With that, Gibbs turned on his heel and started to make his way inside, giving Tim a new set of thoughts; stronger thoughts; to play with.

Tim got lost in the fog of his thoughts and didn't seem to notice anything around him. He must have sat there for quite a while, because he missed the footsteps as they approached the bench he was still sitting on, a good hour after Gibbs had gone back to work.

"Tim?" Ziva's small frame knelt in front of him as he sat there and he couldn't help but grin as her pretty brown eyes gazed up at him. "How are you? It is getting cool out here, yes?"

He frowned and realized that the wind had picked up and there was a definite chill in the air. "Huh? I hadn't noticed until now."

Ziva smiled warmly and stood up so she could hold out his jacket. "Then it is a good thing I thought to bring this with me. We do not want you to be ill because you are so deep in your own mind."

Tim took the jacket gratefully and shivered once he'd put it on. The material had been held close to Ziva's body and apart from the faint lingering smell of her perfume on it, he could feel the warmth that still infused the material. "Better?" she asked gently and sat beside Tim with her hands in her lap.

"Much." Tim reached out and reached out for one of her hands so he could hold it. Ziva let him take her hand without giving it a second thought, smiling as he took it gently. The soft, silky skin eased a part of his heart that had seized up with his torrid thoughts of turning out like his father and he found himself relaxing. "Ziva, I..."

"I know what you are going to say, and I would like that very much." The Israeli answered and leaned in to rest her head on his shoulder.

"You do?" With a glance down at her beautiful face, he could see the earnest emotions that resided deep in her chocolate brown eyes.

"I do." She pulled back and gazed deep into his green eyes. "McGee, when you came to me and asked me to help you push down your feelings, I knew back then it was wrong for me to agree. I should have supported you in a way that would have allowed you to get them out instead."

Tim frowned knowing that they'd already touched on this briefly, but refused point blank to let Ziva take the blame for something that he had asked her to do. "No Zee, please. I don't want you to feel as though you did wrong, okay. I...I was wrong and I should have faced my problems without trying to push them away. I thought you and I had already agreed that this was behind us? Remember, I said, I want to move forward and get to a place where I can live again."

Tim's honesty threw here slightly and she felt herself starting to well up slightly at the heartfelt words. "Do you think we can? I mean, if you'll let me...I want to move forward with you, Tim. Please, don't shut me out again, like you did earlier today."

"I wasn't trying to shut you out. I just got overwhelmed and felt the walls closing in on me. I'm fine. Please, just don't feel guilty okay?"

Ziva nodded her agreement but pushed forward with the question that she wanted to ask. "McGee...Tim. I...Please will you come round for dinner later. We can talk in private and I would very much like your company."

Tim grinned for the first time since running from Abby's lab and nodded his head as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "That would be perfect, Ziva. Thanks."

They both sat there for a moment before the chill infused them down to their bones. They decided to stop off and get coffee on the way back, but as they walked to the office, Tim couldn't help but feel grounded and safe as he held the small, comforting hand in his.

"So, Where's this going, Zee?" Tim asked as he poured the wine that he'd bought. He'd stopped off and picked up Ziva's favorite knowing that his friend had planned to cook.

"What do you mean?" Ziva asked gently and cocked her head. Tim looked at her warmly and noticed how soft her face was when her beautiful hair hung loose around her shoulders.

"This...us."

"Mcgee...Sorry, Tim. I want this to go slowly. What we are feeling; the attraction, is strong and I do not want to rush into anything."

Tim nodded and grinned because she'd answered perfectly. He didn't know what she expected and didn't feel ready for the physical side of the relationship just yet. "That's good."

"You are relieved." Ziva grinned, her pretty brown eyes sparkling in the candlelight. "Why is that?"

"Because I'm not ready to rush into things. I don't...I'm not..." Tim struggled to find the words that he wanted to say and sat there gazing at the flickering flame. He was startled when two warm hands dropped down onto his shoulders and started to massage gently.

"You are not him, Tim. You are a wonderfully warm, beautiful person who I admire...though you are full of knots. How can you walk around like this? It must be painful."

Tim nodded gently and relaxed into her ministrations. "Yeah, my back has been one big ache for weeks now."

Ziva understood and leaned over to blow out the candle. "Come."

"Huh?"

"Come with me. I am going to give you a back rub to get rid of those tense muscles and you are going to tell me why it is, that you do not believe you are worthy of love."

Tim shook his head and blushed. "It's not that I don't think I'm worthy; although you only have to look at my track record to see where I'd get it from; if that were what I was thinking."

"Then what is it?"

He let himself be pulled up and felt Ziva's small hand push gently into the small of his back to guide him. He started walking and it wasn't until he reached the bedroom door, that he realized where Ziva was taking him.

"Zee..."

"Backrub, McGee. Take off you t-shirt and let me help." She pushed him inside and watched with interest as he slowly stripped off his shirt to reveal the undershirt he wore "You did not answer my question."

"What question?"

"If you are not feeling that you are not worthy of love, what is wrong?"

He stripped off his undershirt and stood there feeling vulnerable and wary. "I don't want to be like him." He whispered and sat down on the bed.

"Lay down. On your stomach. You are not allergic to anything?"

"Not that I know of." Tim replied and laid down.

"Good...Tim, you are not like him. You barely get angry and even when you do, you do not get violent. Do you remember how you were when you first shot someone?"

"How..."

"Abby told me." Ziva replied softly and Tim could smell the soft scent of massage oil as she poured it into her hands. "And even Tony and I could tell how much it affected you. You were closer to her at that point."

"Yeah...well, not really. I hoped that she'd give me the answers I needed. She couldn't. I know what you're saying Zee, but what if...Oh God." Tim groaned as a particularly tight knot released.

"Good?"

"Oh, yeah. Very."

Ziva leaned down and kissed his shoulder. "You are not him." She whispered and went back to helping Tim loosen up. It wasn't long before she had him laying there in a loose puddle. When she finally sat back on the base of Tim's back, she heard a gentle snore and smiled warmly before getting up and settling a blanket over him. She leaned over and combed her hand through his hair gently before kissing his temple and settling down next to him. As she laid her hand over his, where it rested on the pillow, she offered him a whispered promise.

"Sleep well, Tim. We will talk more in the morning."