As Severus was not a woman to be easily persuaded into attending the 'fussier' functions of womanhood, much less those of Pureblood society, Narcissa Malfoy had none-too-subtly resorted to emotional terrorism in the pursuit of securing Severus's attendance at the baby shower she was throwing on said woman's behalf. And while Sirius had found the tactics his blonde cousin had employed more than just a little tasteless, as she had most shamelessly used her miscarriage for such, he could not help but admit that the affair was relatively successful. Both well-catered and well-attended, Sirius even found himself enjoying the company despite his many reassurances to the doubtful Remus that he would do nothing of the sort.
Having long ago seen his exhausted wife into the most comfortable chair in the formal parlor, one nearest to the fireplace and heavily padded, Sirius had inexplicably found himself immersed in a riveting conversation with Lucius Malfoy on the merits of having Azkaban shut down for its gross violations of human rights. So surprised to find himself in such staunch agreement with the blonde man, someone he knew he should despite entirely, Sirius barely took any notice of Alecto Carrow strolling into the room more than an hour late.
Seeming nothing inherently harmful about such negligence, aside from the annoyance such rudeness brought him, Sirius was fully prepared to ignore the tactless woman for the remainder of the afternoon. His mind thusly made up, he took a polite sip of his martini and made to finish sharing his thoughts on how best to shut down the prison with his cousin-in-law. But before he could so much as formulate a sentence in his mind, much less utter a syllable, the late arrival cut him off with her mannishly loud voice.
"Merlin, Severus!" The lone twin exclaimed, calling all focus unto herself. "How big you've grown! Why, it's a wonder you can even fit into that chair!"
While Narcissa had evidently taken pity on her child's Godmother and ensured that the majority of the guests were, at the very least, on friendly terms with the honoree, social protocols had unfortunately dictated that a few of the more unpleasant woman in her life needed to be invited as well.
"Alecto!" Squeaked Ambrosia Nott, highly offended on behalf of her peer. "How could you say such a thing!?"
More suited to Hufflepuff and the Slytherin House she had somehow been sorted into, the curly-haired woman had seated herself next to Severus in order to better fulfill her duties as the self-appointed caregiver to the expectant woman for the duration of the event. And while said woman had initially protested quite heavily against such coddling, Severus now seemed glad for it as she watched the petite woman rise to her defense.
"I cannot be the only one to have commented on how much she's ballooned." Alecto scoffed dismissively, clumsily tossing an impossibly small gift bag unto the appropriate table.
Too flustered to even return the barb with one of her more-famous insults, Severus glowered violently at the squat redhead and looked fully prepared to lob her glass of water at the instigator's doughy face.
"Severus is pregnant." Lucius reminded with a hiss, looking fully prepared to toss the obnoxious woman out of his manor.
As all eyes turned to both victim and victimizer, Severus squirmed uncomfortably and pulled the emerald blanket pooled atop her legs up over her the large swell of her belly. But while the blanket was quite thick, made more for winter than for fall, the fabric did very little to conceal it's wearers shape. Almost triumphant at the realization of such, Alecto smirked and looked expectantly about the room, all but daring anyone to argue against her earlier claims.
"I will remind you that I carried that large with my Theodore." Ambrosia defended, rising to the bait as tactfully as she could.
Irredeemably mortified at having a matter so private as her weight publicly discussed, Severus cast desperate eyes at Sirius in the hopes that we would find a way to spare her any further embarrassment. But before he could so much as think of a way in which he might do so, without offending anyone, yet another woman rose to his wife's defense.
"And she has such a tiny frame." Remarked Lanora Greengrass. "Of course the baby is making her look large."
While the comment was well-intended, Severus still frowned at the further insinuations that she had grown big.
"Good Merlin!" Sirius exclaimed, wishing to mitigate the damage already done. "Can we stop discussing my wife's weight?!"
Sirius could not help but relax as he noticed the relieved way in everyone nodded their heads in agreement, for he felt it more than just a little crucial for the subject of weight to be discontinued as he had long since begun to suspect that pregnancy was the only reason Severus had even allowed herself to get back to a proper weight for someone her size- as the condition had given her the 'excuse' for growing 'fat.' And while his wife had certainly taken some liberties with her size during the last two months, resulting in some extra padding, Sirius could not help but think such a necessary and relatively harmless.
"Oh, yes!" Lanora agreed heartily. "Shall we play another game?"
"I do believe we've run out of games to play." Ambrosia provided, upon hearing the majority of the men in the room groan at her friends suggestion.
Looking relieved to have gotten out of playing yet another awkward game, Severus sighed softly and leaned back heavily in her chair.
"We might as well have Severus open her gifts." Narcissa decided, effectively ruining whatever relief her honoree might have gleaned from learning there were no more games to play.
"You should not have gotten me anything at all." Severus fussed, looking highly uncomfortable at being so pampered.
"But this is your baby shower." Lanora reminded her. "Of course we did!"