Alright, just so you all know the situation:
Depending on if I'm able to get that far, I will try to go as far as I can throughout the entire Total Drama series as a whole. Yep, that's right. I might even go through Total Drama, the Musical if I can make it that far.
And that is one of the reasons why I've been updating this so much recently. I want to try to get as far as I can before I lose interest again. Now, it's gonna be hard to balance out with college work, but I promise you that I'll do my best to not let you down. I may be notorious for losing interest in stories and, as a result, failing to update them, but this fic has been a lot of fun to write so far, and gives me a good excuse to watch episodes of Total Drama over and over again. XD So I doubt any lack of interest for this story will be permanent.
Also, for those of you who are worried that me going into later seasons will result in a fic so long that one's eyes will bleed by the end of it, don't worry. I've decided to split up the seasons. That's right, at the end of TDDDDI, this story will finish, and I will make a sequel for TDA, and another for TDM if I ever get that far.
For those of you who have taken the time to read this author's note, thank you. You guys are the reason we have author's notes in the first place. XD
Total Drama is owned by Fresh TV.
-X-
Façade: Through the Eyes of the Codemeister
Chapter Thirty-Six: Benedict Harold
It wasn't long after the silence ended that Courtney began abusing her cell phone, trying to get the names of the best lawyers in Canada for what would soon be her "War on Chris." I didn't blame her. I wasn't even upset at Harold for what he did--being bullied myself before, I understood it. Sometimes when you get bullied enough, you snap and do something you will later regret. No, I wasn't upset at Harold at all. It was Chris that upset me. Though I have to hand it to the guy, he's good at coming up with excuses. But still... I hope he knows what he just got himself into...
We were all in the cafeteria, sans Courtney, who was still in her room calling up law firms. And it was a good thing too, because the next thing we knew...
"Hello, everyone!"
My eyes widened, and I heard several gasps around me.
"Oh, dude! You gotta hide!" Tyler quickly shouted.
"Huh?" the newest addition to our list of losers asked, dumbfounded. It was as if he forgot what he did just three days before.
"Dude! Courtney knows!" I shouted as well, hurting my throat as I did so.
At that, his face went pale. "GOSH, seriously?!"
"Yes!"
"Oh, man!" He began to panic. "I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna--"
He was cut off by a gasp, and everyone stood silent. I saw everyone's eyes shift to an area of the room I couldn't see at the moment, but judging by the gasp... I had a good idea who made it.
"YOU!!"
Yep. I was right.
"HAAAAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD!!" I heard her scream as the poor gawky teen ran for his life out the doors he came in, Courtney hot on his trail.
A long silence followed, but Noah eventually broke it. "He's screwed."
-X-
From what I was told, Harold had managed to evade Courtney. The nerd had a keen sense of knowing where to hide, which kept the CIT out of his hair for the time being. Also, luckily for him, Courtney often gave up her searches when taunted by Tyler, Izzy, or Noah for her inability to find Harold's hiding places.
It was the day after Harold came to the resort, and the poor guy wasn't able to enjoy it. Izzy told me he was hiding in a crawlspace she told him to try. Courtney luckily hadn't found it yet.
No one at the resort liked what Courtney was doing to poor Harold, but no one dared to confront Courtney about it, until...
"Um... why are you doing this, eh?"
"Go away, Homeschool. I'm trying to find Harold." She began checking under the tables in the cafeteria, hoping to spot someone between our legs.
"Um... seriously, though... why?"
"Because Harold's a traitor," Courtney finally answered him.
"Court--" I tried to cut in, but she stopped me.
"Don't even start, Cody." She turned back to Ezekiel. "Harold cheated me out of one hundred grand. He was a liability to the Bass, and he went against the team's wishes and illegally took me out of the game to spite Duncan." She held up the wooden skull Duncan gave her and began to "examine" it, or so it looked. "He's a traitor to the Bass and to his fellow man."
"Hey, Court?" I spoke up, and she rolled her eyes as she turned to me.
"What?"
I glanced at the skull still in her hand and smirked. "Alas, poor Yorick. I knew him, Horatio..." [1]
"Ugh!" Courtney scoffed and walked away.
I turned to Ezekiel, who seemed to be deep in thought. "You okay, dude?"
"...Is Harold really a traitor, eh?"
I glanced away for a moment before giving Ezekiel my response. "Look, I'm not gonna get involved in anything Courtney's pulling, okay? But you believe whatever you wanna believe, 'kay?"
"Um... okay..."
Ultimately, Ezekiel, and a few others, found Harold to be what Courtney called "a traitor." Now, don't get me wrong--what he did was traitorous, so in a way... yes, he really was. But the people that sided with Courtney seemed to have forgotten was that Chris was also at fault in the end. He knew about it, and he did nothing. In fact, he flat out told Courtney and everyone else here at the Playa des Losers that he screwed Courtney over.
Well, if no one else will, I'll defend the guy. At least mentally. Physically, I wouldn't do a very good job, especially not at the moment.
God, I hope I start feeling the effects of that miracle healing the doctors told me about soon...
-X-
Well, what do you know?
My prayers were answered the next morning.
It wasn't much, but during physical therapy I was actually able to turn my head slightly and raise my hands about a centimeter. The doctors said it would still take a few weeks and a couple surgeries before I could finally kiss this wheelchair goodbye, but Sadie and I were still very happy with my progress.
"Man, I can't wait 'til I can move on my own," I sighed softly. "Do you think I should've gone with that reboning thing?"
"I don't know," Sadie shrugged, "but that's not up to me, Cody."
"I know." I decided it'd be best to drop the subject. "Do you think Courtney's going to kill Harold?"
"I hope she doesn't... but yes," she admitted. "He's dead."
-X-
Sadie and I told the others the good news, almost accidentally revealing Harold's hiding spot as I heard, among the cheering, a "Boo-ya--Oh crap!" within the walls. Luckily, Courtney wasn't in the mood to care at the moment.
Katie, Tyler, Beth, and Izzy all congratulated my speedy road to recovery with much excitement, while Noah, Eva, and Ezekiel were a lot quieter with their congrats. Justin and Courtney just smiled, but didn't say a word.
And no, it's not like I was really paying attention to that either ("Ooh, let's see who my real friends are! Kidding"), I just wanted to paint a mental picture for you.
-X-
Nothing much else happened that day, just the usual. Katie and Sadie were taking me to different areas of the resort and chatting with me, Noah kept reading his books, Eva and Tyler continued to have arm wrestling matches every so often (Eva always winning), and Harold continued to hide from Courtney (okay, that's rather new, but it would become a usual thing).
So because nothing happened for the most part, I'll skip ahead to the next day, when we received yet another video from Chris...
-X-
"Alright, everybody here?" Tyler asked our group.
"Everyone except Harold," Noah pointed out. "He's still hiding from Courtney."
"Don't mention that sleaze ball," Courtney scoffed, rolling her eyes. "He's the reason why I'm here. He took away my chances at the hundred grand; he doesn't deserve to watch his own elimination."
"...Meh, I'll just show it to him later," Tyler conceded, and pressed play.
The episode started with Chris waking up the campers with his yellow airplane. ...Alright, if you want to get technical, it actually started with a bear stealing marshmallows, but to be honest... the last thing I really wanted to think about was a bear.
After nearly making roadkill... er... airkill out of the campers, Chris landed the plane and announced the campers' challenge: "extreme sports."
"Yeah, like the challenges on the show aren't already extreme enough," Noah scoffed.
Chris explained the challenges, with Chef demonstrating each one... in very painful and horrifying ways. Needless to say, no one felt sorry for the guy. In fact, some of us were laughing our asses off.
Then Chris told them what the winners' prize was going to be: a mobile shower.
"Owen sure could use that," Noah smugly pointed out.
"You have no idea..." I chuckled.
Chris told the campers to take a twenty minute break for breakfast, then left them in the dust... literally.
"Sometimes, I really don't think he cares about their health," Tyler said.
"Sometimes?" Noah asked cynically.
The scene cut to Owen eating Chef's food (I think Owen's the only that could probably digest that crap), but the interesting thing was... there was something in it... er, on it, actually.
Owen ate it before I could give it a good look, but luckily for my curiosity he burped it out. It appeared to be a love note...
Chef, just now noticing the note that once decorated his food, which made me wonder if he even knew what the food he cooked looked like, picked it up to read it. "'For the girl with smoldering eyes'?" he read questioningly. He shrugged it off and threw it down.
And guess who found it... well, one of the two, anyway...
"Ew, Bridgette actually picked that up?" Katie shuddered. "It was in Owen's mouth!"
"Ew, I know, that was so gross!" Sadie added.
Oh, and for the record, no, I wasn't referring to Bridgette.
The love note turned out to be a corny haiku, and frankly, I was hoping for one of them to read it. What can I say? I was curious.
But I couldn't complain. What happened next though was probably just as interesting as the haiku itself was. The girls began to argue over who they thought the haiku was for. At first they were arguing that it was probably for the other, but it turned ugly and they began assuming it was for themselves.
This... probably wasn't going to end well...
-X-
The teams went back to Chris after breakfast to get ready for the first challenge. And poor Gwen had embarrassed herself with her "subtle" way of assuming Trent had written the haiku. The clip showed Bridgette's and Duncan's reactions, the latter of which induced a soft swoon from my left. Well, at least she's not yelling or anything.
The plane was now up in the air, and DJ and Trent were... almost ready to jump. Before they could, though, Chris stopped them, asking them if they wanted to sign a form for organ donations. But before he could be turned down, he realized the drop zone was coming and dismissed the idea.
Meanwhile, the Gopher girls found themselves in a bind. Apparently, the sofa-bed was a little heavy...
Gwen must've gotten an idea, because she was the first to pop her head out from behind the couch. The expression on her face told her teammates that she found the answer.
Owen was sleeping on the sofa-bed.
The four girls then decided that the best course of action would be to push the big sack of joy off the bed, but I doubted it was a good idea that they were doing it from behind. I've been caught behind that thing before--the backwind is horrific!
Luckily for them, the backwind didn't come, but they still had no luck in pushing Owen off the bed. So, Heather came up with a new idea...
"At least it'll be a soft landing," Gwen said onscreen.
As if responding to her, Tyler said, "Yep. X marks the spot."
Unfortunately, that X wasn't the spot where Trent landed...
"OOH!!!" Tyler and Noah both groaned, and I cringed at the sight as well.
"That had to hurt, eh," Ezekiel said once again.
"Did he survive that?" Courtney asked.
"Dude, I think Gwen's cursed," Tyler said.
"Why do you say that?" I replied to him.
"Well, no offense, Cody, but it looks like every guy that likes her ends up in a lot of pain."
"...Hmm. You've got a point," I agreed.
DJ's landing was a little softer than Trent's... at first. Then the sofa-bed folded up on him.
"Yeesh!" Noah... yeeshed.
"That sucks," Tyler added.
-X-
"Alright, you know what? Screw it," Chef said as he put Trent on a stretcher. "I'm not giving you an option like I did Scrawny. You're gettin' reboned."
"Nye-hya-huh?" Trent mumbled out.
"Glad you asked!" Chef exclaimed with a smile as he began an explanation quite like he did for me. When he finished, Trent looked like he was about ready to pass out.
Chris flew around the island once more before announcing the Bass as the winners of the first challenge.
"Nice going, Trent," Heather said as Chef wheeled Trent up to them.
Gwen, who actually looked concerned for the fallen Gopher, asked if Trent had anything to say to her, most likely about the haiku. Well, at least it was subtle this time.
"Yeah... is my hair messed up?"
At that, I could tell Gwen had given up on any hopes that the haiku was for her. I felt bad for her, I really did. If she wanted one, I'd write a romantic haiku for her.
...You know, if I wasn't with Sadie... or if I could move my arms...
The scene cut to the second challenge, and, much like Gwen before her, Bridgette had a not-so-subtle moment, which also backfired.
Geoff ultimately lost his challenge, ending up going headfirst and pantsless into a pile of socks. Yeah, that's always fun. Even more fun: Chris yet again had a little fun with the editing. I began to wonder if he really did have a problem with his hair and make-up with that shot, or if he did that on purpose for further humiliation on Geoff's part. Honestly, I think it could go either way...
Leshawna was up next, and the moose meant business, even trampling Chef as it smashed through the fence.
The scene, surprisingly in mid-challenge, cut to Bridgette and Gwen, still at each others' throats... in words.
"So? Your guy's a metro with a broken back!"
"So? Your guy's a grammatically challenged skater flake!"
As bad as one might take this quarrel to be, Leshawna riding the moose in the background made me laugh regardless. But the quarrel ended, as they admitted that their boyfriends didn't write the poem and it probably wasn't for them anyway, and they made up.
"What a heartwarming moment," Noah said sarcastically, but I smiled anyway.
"Yes, it is," I added, actually being sincere.
Leshawna won the challenge, by the way, and Chris started the tie-breaker round: the extreme sea-doo water-ski challenge... on mud. Lindsay and Harold were riding for their respective teams, and Duncan and Heather were driving their respective sea-doos.
Harold entered the confession can at that moment, describing all this to us. After a self-motivational monologue involving what I found to be a pretty amusing "Dirty Harry" reference, the scene cut to just outside the confession can, where Gwen and Bridgette were trying to figure out who wrote the haiku, and for whom. They ruled out Duncan and Harold right away, the latter because he had just finished his monologue, and he appeared before them wearing cheap sunglasses and no pants. Also, he tripped while leaving the can.
"Serves him right," Courtney said smugly, rolling her eyes.
As it would turn out, Gwen and Bridgette would, yet again, find no luck in locating the mystery haiku poet. If you ask me, though, Gwen got the short end of the stick. Even if the gas goes up instead of down, you don't want to be caught in Owen's crossfire.
Meanwhile, it was time for Harold's time to shine. Now, judging by the fact that he's here, I assumed... no, he wasn't going to shine. But I was still interested in exactly how and why he ended up getting the boot.
Harold was actually doing a pretty good job with the challenge. It looked like he was about to win...
And Heather knew this...
...Hey, wait...
What's she...?
And where did she get that...?
Whoa, wait...
Uh-oh...
...
...Whooooooooooooa...
"Eep! Woord of warning would've bean [2] nice, eh!"
"Aw, man... Why couldn't that have been Lindsay?"
"Heh heh... Tyler, playa, playa."
"Cody, are you drooling?"
"N-n-no, Sadie, I..."
"Don't lie to me now..."
"...A-Alright... Yeah."
"We're going to have a talk after this. Honesty is always the best policy, you know."
"...I'll keep that in mind..."
-X-
It was now Lindsay's turn to "mud-ski." And as it turns out, she was damn good at it.
And as you can imagine, Tyler's head was in the clouds.
"She's... amazing..."
"Yeah, we know, Tyler," Noah said in an uninterested tone, "but we don't care."
In the end, Lindsay won the challenge, much to the dismay of the Bass (especially Duncan, who found himself thrown into a tree after crashing his sea-doo, and Geoff, who stank to high heaven), and won invincibility, as well as the mobile shower.
"Poor Geoff," Sadie pointed out.
"I knoooow," Katie added. "He totally needed that shower."
-X-
It was nearing the end of the tape, and Gwen and Bridgette still hadn't figured out who the poet or the crush girl was, despite their efforts.
Just then, Leshawna appeared, and she took some interest in the note.
Chris had also been standing nearby. "Another note from your secret admirer, Leshawna?"
Tyler laughed. "Busted."
"Smoldering eyes... makes sense to me," Noah joked.
Gwen and Bridgette were dumbfounded; a part of them probably still wished it was for them. But one question was still on their minds:
Who wrote the love letter?
-X-
It was now time for a Bass to go home, and right away something didn't seem right, but at the moment, I couldn't quite put my finger on it.
Bridgette and DJ ended up getting their marshmallows first. Then he pulled out a megaphone and told a treed Geoff he was safe, and I mentally slapped myself in the forehead. Duh. Geoff, that's right.
Now, I wasn't surprised that Duncan was on the block, considering the fact that Harold was probably the one that voted for him (and possibly Bridgette... I don't know for sure though...). But of course, he got the final marshmallow anyway, and Harold didn't even seem too shocked or saddened by it.
"Why did DUNCAN give him a high-five?!"
...
"Courtney, shut up," Tyler grumbled.
"MAKE ME!!"
"SHUT!" Eva began to shout slowly and clearly. "UP!"
That did it. Courtney was now silent.
"Teach me how to do that," Tyler whispered, and Eva chuckled.
"Maybe if you can beat me at arm wrestling, I will."
Onscreen, before Harold threw his stuff into the boat, he turned back to the cameras and made his farewell speech:
"Farewell, Total Drama Island. I loved, I lost... and I saw boobies... What more can a man ask for?"
"Amen to that," I said with a chuckle.
Onscreen, three girls were questioning his speech.
"You loved?" Gwen.
"You're a man?" Leshawna.
"You saw boobies?" Bridgette.
Harold threw his stuff into the boat, and again turned back to the crowd. "Leshawna. I meant every word of that poem."
"Whoa, what?!" I couldn't see her, but judging by that response I imagined Courtney with eyes the size of beach balls.
"Playa, playa," Tyler jokingly said.
"Um... noo he ain't," Ezekiel pointed out. "He's oot o' the game; he can't play anymoore, eh."
And in a moment that could only be captured by either an insane reality TV show or a weird-ass movie with no dynamic camera usage and gawky, messed-up humor, [3] Harold and Leshawna embraced, Leshawna planting a kiss on his lips, causing the girls to swoon and the boys to look on in indifference. In the end, Chef had to pull Harold away.
...I still wanted to know what was in that letter, dammit.
"Well, doesn't say much for her taste in men, huh?"
"THAT'S IT!" I saw Eva stomp past me. "CAN'T YOU SEE WE'RE TRYING TO WATCH THE SHOW HERE?! SHUT! UP!! OR ELSE!!!"
"...O...Okay..."
"Thank you." With that, Eva walked back over to her seat.
Well, despite that outburst, we didn't exactly miss much, just Leshawna chasing Heather down for showing Harold her boobs. Now, I know she didn't intend to do so, but I was certainly hoping Leshawna would catch up to the witch and teach her a lesson in manners.
"Aaaaand it looks like that's it," Tyler said as the tape ended. "Darn... I gotta wait another three days before I can see Lindsay again..."
"Um... well, at least you're not waiting a week," I said, trying to cheer up the jock.
"True..."
"Also, didn't you say you're going to be showing this to Harold?" Noah asked.
"...Oh yeah, that's right." He grinned. "WOO! I got an excuse to see Lindsay in that rocking bikini again!"
I chuckled. Well, at least I'm not the only perv here, right?
Sadie stood up. "Now, Cody, about that talk..."
I gulped. I forgot about that.
"Right, Sadie," I chuckled nervously. "We're going someplace private, right?"
"Uh, duh!" she exclaimed as she walked behind me. "Maybe at the dock?"
"...You're not gonna pull a Beth on me, are you?"
I got a very nasty look from Beth at that, and I quickly apologized.
"Nnnnooooooooooooooooooo..."
...Well, I was still worried about what may happen to me during this "talk", but at least I wouldn't end up at the bottom of the lake.
-X-
"Cody..."
"Y-Yeah?" I asked nervously.
"How come you lied like that before?"
...Why did I lie before? I mean, I know I didn't want to hurt her feelings, but now that I put some thought into it... she knew I was a perv. I wouldn't have needed to.
I still answered her as truthfully as I possibly could. "I just... didn't want to hurt you, y'know? I mean... I didn't want you to think I would take her over you or anything, 'cause I wouldn't. She's just too mean."
"...You liked Gwen, though, didn't you?"
...
"She was pretty mean, wasn't she?"
...
"...Cody?"
"Yeah, I guess she was... but that's a different mean. It's the island that's making her mad and all. Heather's just... awful..."
"...True..."
"...Look, just because someone is hot, it doesn't mean I want to be with them or anything..." Oh crap! I bit my lower lip. I really need to think about how what I say can be used out of context before speaking.
Luckily, she didn't. "Well, I'm glad. Heather's a witch."
I blinked a few times, and smiled. "Take that 'w' and switch it with a 'b'."
"...'Bell', I'm glad?"
"What?"
She giggled. "Kidding."
I sighed with relief and chuckled along with her. "Funny."
"I try."
"...So, you wanna go back to the others?"
"...Uuuuummmmmmmmmmm... nope!"
"No?"
She kissed me on the cheek. "Nope. Let's stay out here for a while."
I beamed. "I'd like that."
And she sat on the dock next to me, and for what felt like an eternity we stayed there, looking out to the beautiful waters of Muskoka, Ontario.
-X-
[1] From Shakespeare's "Hamlet." During the speech Cody is alluding to, Hamlet is holding a skull.
[2] Actually, "been"
[3] Yes, that's supposed to describe Napoleon Dynamite. Fitting, eh?
-X-
You may have noticed this chapter is a little longer than most. Yeah, see, I'm going to try to gun for longer chapters now so there won't be SO GOSH DARN MANY! XD So, if I remember to keep doing so, expect an "episode recap" in every chapter, at least until there's enough people at the Playa des Losers that we can have much more interesting interacting being done. : )
And also, sorry if you were expecting more "Harold vs. Courtney" moments. Since no one gets eliminated next time, there may be more to come in the next chapter. ...Maybe...