(After 'The Pain in the Heart')
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He couldn't believe his life had changed so much in such a short space of time. He and Brennan had crossed the line together and were now in a personal relationship. They had talked it over and they both agreed that their relationship needed to remain a secret for a while. They weren't sure what the FBI would do about their partnership and they wanted to work together for as long as they could. If their partnership was dissolved, they were confident that their relationship would remain intact. They had gone through too much to change their minds about that now. They were both determined to have a successful relationship and they wouldn't allow changes in their partnership to destroy it.
Though he had plenty of work to do, Booth found that he wasn't in the mood to do anything work related. The last two evenings had been spent with Brennan in her apartment and the euphoria he felt was a high he didn't want to come down from.
"Agent Booth." Sweets stood in the doorway and was puzzled by Booth's lack of response. He raised his voice and stepped into the room. "Agent Booth!"
Startled, Booth looked towards the door to see who his visitor was. "What do you want?"
Clearing his throat, Sweets ran his hand down the front of his jacket betraying how nervous he was. "May I speak to you?" He needed to clear some things up with Booth since the man was head of Major Crimes. Worried that Booth might bar him from profiling any cases, the young man knew he had to apologize and if needed to grovel. "I won't take up too much of your time since I know you're busy."
The sight of Sweets reminded Booth that he had unfinished business with the psychologist. "Come in and close the door." Once the door was closed, he motioned for the younger man to sit on the chair in front of his desk.
Still afraid that the agent might find a way to get him terminated, Sweets licked his lower lip and wished he'd had a drink of water before he'd come to Booth's office. His mouth was so dry, he found it hard to swallow. "Um, I'm here to apologize to you. I have thought over my actions and I know that what I did was disrespectful to you and Dr. Brennan, but I really did feel like what I had done was in the best interests of National Security . . ."
Quickly holding up his right hand, Booth interrupted his visitor; "Hold it right there . . . You can't tell me in one breath that you realize you were disrespectful and you want to apologize then in the next breath, tell me that you think what you did was right. That is bullshit. You're either apologizing or you're not."
Aware that the Agent was angry and that Brennan wasn't there to calm the man down, he knew that he had mis-stepped and he needed to fix it. "No, you're right. I do apologize. I was just giving you my reason for doing what I did, but I was wrong to do what I did. I should have contacted Dr. Brennan and I will never let this happen again."
"You're damn right you won't." Booth leaned back against his chair and studied the man for a few seconds. "I've talked to my ex, Rebecca and to my grandfather and I've given them a list of contacts. If I'm ever put in this position again, they will contact everyone on the list and let them know what's going on. I can't trust you or the FBI to do what's right."
The surprised him. "Oh look, I don't think you can do that." Sweets was worried that Booth was willing to flaunt protocol. "There are procedures . . ."
"Fuck procedures." Booth glared at the psychologist and tried to rein in his anger. "If I can't rely upon the FBI to make sure procedures are followed then why the hell would I care about them either? . . . I've talked to Fairburn and I told him that from now on, I want the Assistant Deputy Director to call my contact list. I told him that you'd skipped telling Bones about me being alive and I can't allow that to happen again."
Alarmed, Sweets swallowed hard. "Wait, you told the Deputy Director I didn't tell Dr. Brennan? When did you do that?" He hadn't heard from Fairburn, but he knew it was inevitable. "I thought you weren't going to talk to him about this."
"I told you I wouldn't go after your job and I didn't, but I can't trust you to do the right thing when it comes to my personal interests." Booth leaned forward and rested his arms on the desk. "You betrayed me and Dr. Brennan. I don't give a shit what your reasons were for doing what you did. I trust the FBI to follow procedures. That allows me to do my job knowing that everyone has my back. You do not have my back and I won't forget that."
His heart beat racing, Sweets was frightened. "I did what I did to protect your mission. I didn't tell Dr. Brennan because she's socially awkward and very blunt. She might have told Angela or Dr. Saroyan that you were alive. I had to make sure you were safe. You were dealing with a terrorist . . . a terrorist."
Unsure if he was being lied to or not, Booth shrugged his shoulders. "I will allow you to continue to work with us as our profiler. You're pretty good at that and I don't plan to take this any further, but you did betray me and I won't forget it . . . ever."
"I'm sorry, Agent Booth. I really am." Sweets wasn't sure what the future would bring, but he knew that he would have to find a way to make up for what he had done to the Agent and Brennan. "I made some poor decisions and . . . well, it won't happen again. I promise you that."
Waving his hand towards the door, Booth had had enough of the conversation. "I have work to do."
Standing, Sweets knew that he had been dismissed. "I . . . I'm sorry."
Once the young man had left his office, Booth leaned back against his chair once more and thought about the wonderful evening he'd had in the arms of his partner. Making love to her had been everything that he'd thought it would be and he knew that he would do everything in his power to make sure their relationship worked. She was everything that he wanted.
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The last two weeks had been an emotional roller coaster for Brennan. She had witnessed her partner shot by a stalker and been told he had died. She had mourned his passing only to have her partner show up at her apartment to make sure she knew he was alive. The funeral had been chaotic with Booth struggling to overcome the terrorist who had come to his funeral and forcing her to intervene to help him. The serial killer, Gormogon had vied for her attention and ultimately her associate, Zach had been exposed as Gormogon's apprentice. That betrayal was hard to take and she had floundered emotionally trying to reconcile what he'd done.
Thankfully, Booth had been there to help her through that. Zach's betrayal had hurt her very much. Her associate was a man of science and logic and to see him betray everything they both believed in by being swayed by a cold-blooded killer was heart breaking and unfathomable. "If Zach, who has a higher IQ than I do, can fall for the deceptive logic that Gormogon used to make Zach betray his beliefs, then aren't I just as susceptible?"
Surprised that Brennan had even gone there, Booth rolled onto his side and placed his hand on her hip. "Zach has been living in a bubble for a long time. He's not adaptable and he's incapable of adjusting to normal society. The Army got rid of him because he couldn't adapt and he was endangering the men he worked with . . . You are capable of adapting. You've worked on digs in dangerous situations and you did it successfully. You work with the FBI and you're the reason why our success rate with cold cases is so high. If Gormogon had approached you, you would have seen through his fallacies in a heart beat because a high IQ doesn't mean anything unless you also have common sense to go with it. Zach doesn't have common sense. He never has . . . I absolutely know that you'd never fall for shit like Zach did because you have tons of common sense."
He trusted her and Brennan appreciated that. Booth had found a logical way to answer her questions and she loved him for that. "I wish he had come to me when he was approached by Gormogon. I would have helped him to see that he was being manipulated."
"The only one to blame in this situation is Zach. Stop beating yourself up for what he did." Booth moved his hand slowly up and down her hip. "He's an adult and he made his own decisions. You didn't do anything wrong." He saw her nod her head and he hoped he was getting through to her. "Hey, you'll get a new intern to help you at the Lab and you'll do your job like you always do. Don't let this get you down, Bones." He moved closer and kissed her. "I have your back. 24/7, I have your back. You're not alone in this mess. I'm right here with you."
His kindness made her heart beat faster. Placing her hand behind his head, she kissed him long and passionately. "I missed you. That is a thought that keeps popping into my head. When I thought you were dead . . . I missed you."
"Yeah and I missed you too." Booth knew that Brennan was trying to come to terms with a lot that had happened to her in the last two weeks and he regretted that he had caused her any pain. "I talked to Rebecca and Pops. If the FBI ever forces me to go undercover and I don't get a chance to talk to you about it . . . they've promised me that they'll tell you what's going on. I told Sweets that too. He didn't like it, but I don't care. He betrayed us and I'm not ready to forgive him or trust him, at least not yet. He needs to prove to me that we can trust him."
"But you aren't going to get him fired, are you?" Brennan didn't want Sweets to be fired. He was young, inexperienced and what he had done was professionally unethical, but he worked well with Booth as a profiler and she knew that Booth actually liked the boy.
His hand stopped and he rolled back onto his back. "No, I should, but no. He came by my office today and I told him that he can still be my profiler, but I don't trust him to have my back. He hurt you, he made you think I was dead and that's wrong. I don't get why he thought that was okay. You're trustworthy and his excuse was bullshit . . . If it ever looks like I've been killed or something don't trust the FBI to tell you the truth. Check with Pops and Rebecca. They should know what's going on."
"I will." Brennan move closer to Booth and draped her arm across his chest. "You have Parker on Saturday. If we're going to keep our relationship a secret, I think it would be best if you slept in your apartment tomorrow. I may drop by to visit with Parker on Sunday afternoon, if you want me to."
"Of course, I want you to." Booth moved his hand and placed it on her arm. "I'm going to miss sleeping with you. We've only been together for three days and I already hate sleeping alone."
She felt the same way. "It will only be for two days . . . I may pack a bag and come over Monday night. It's not fair to you if we just use my apartment to sleep together."
"Thanks." Booth sighed. "You know you can call me this weekend if you want to." He knew that he might be tempted to call Brennan, but he didn't want her to think he was smothering her. He knew that she was working on a new book and she'd probably like the solitude. "Hey, you can work on that novel you're writing. Maybe you'll get more done when I'm not around."
"I know I will, but it won't be as fun as when you're here." Brennan was enjoying her new-found relationship very much. "I find that I am more relaxed when you are staying with me. I've never felt like this before. Most of my relationships have been based upon convenience and mutual desire . . . I like this relationship better."
He didn't really care to hear about her past relationships, but he listened and appreciated what she was trying to tell him. "I love you Bones. That's the difference. I love you and I want this to work."
Her throat was tight from emotion, so she remained silent. She hoped that Booth would be patient with her. She wasn't used to being in a relationship like this and she wasn't sure what the rules were. She knew that there were relationship rules, since both he and Angela had mentioned them in the past, but she wasn't aware of what they were. She also needed to be patient with Booth. He was emotional and she knew that sooner or later that was going to cause a problem. She just hoped it wouldn't a serious problem. She was starting to believe that she loved him and she was sure they could overcome any obstacles that came their way. At least she hoped so.
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