No new reviews on the last chapter...sad. Very sad. I am disappointed.
loving me will not be easy.
it will be war. you will
hold the gun and i will hand
you the bullets. so breathe,
and embrace the beauty of
the massacre that lies ahead.
–r.m. drake
Rosalie liked to watch Carina, sometimes. The raven haired girl fascinated her endlessly, in the way she moved and spoke. She was something the vampire would never tire of.
So, she watched.
Carina leaned against a tree outside the Cullen home, watching as Jacob tried to build a sufficient enough tire swing for Renesmee, to no avail. It may have been winter, but what the child wanted, she got.
The witch herself was dressed just as scarcely as the rest of them, in her regular attire, though with the addition of her leather jacket. Teddy stood beside her, gripping her finger for support, bundled up in a little snow coat and staring about with wide eyes, awestruck.
It was adorable.
Carina was patient with the boy when he tugged at her pinky suddenly, pulling her along as he slowly trudged through the snow and to where Jacob stood.
Teddy pointed up at the boy, asking curiously, "What doin', Mumma?"
"Making a swing," the witch said vaguely as she crouched by her son's side. "Though not very well."
"It's for Renesmee," Jacob supplied.
"Nessie?" Teddy lit up. He adored the girl. "Mumma, we help?"
Carina raised a brow. "Now, why would you want to do that?"
"For Nessie!" the little boy stared at her as though it were obvious.
"Oh, do I have to?" his mother good naturedly complained.
"Yes!"
Carina shook her head, flicked out her wand, and aimed it at the rope, which had not been strung up yet. It certainly saved time when the tire and rope both lifted into the air, the end of the rope tying itself along a sturdy branch.
Teddy cheered and clapped, releasing his hold on his mother for a moment as he went to toddle forward, only to trip and fall back, blinking up at the sky. He looked so bewildered that Carina, it seemed, was not at all as worried as Rosalie had been. The blonde had very nearly bolted over when she saw him fall.
The raven haired girl merely chuckled and hoisted him onto her hip. "You wanted on the swing?"
Teddy nodded eagerly, and Carina paused, staring at the large tire to gauge what she would do. Rosalie could practically see the gears in her head turning as she approached, leaning against the tree her mate had been before to watch.
"C'mon, Mumma!" Teddy wrinkled his nose at her impatiently. "Swing!"
Carina narrowed her eyes at him, and meekly, he reiterated, ""Pweaseee?"
Resignedly, the witch climbed into the tire swing and held the boy securely around the stomach, before scrunching her nose at Rosalie in the same manner her son had before.
Chuckling, Rosalie made her way over and lightly pushed the swing, sending them sailing forward, and Teddy squealed as they went.
"More, more!" he cried, and Carina scowled a bit when she saw Luna and Alice pop out of the house with cameras.
Teddy was grinned widely, arms outstretched as he all but bounced in Carina's lap. Rosalie noticed that, despite herself, it seemed, the raven haired girl in question was beginning to smile, though she fought valiantly to hide it.
It didn't work, of course, and finally, when she grew tired of the picture taking, she gripped Teddy harder and leaped nimbly into the snow.
Jacob laughed when Renesmee finally came bounding out to see what was going on, watching as the child's eyes lit up at the sight of the swing.
"Thanks, Jake!" she exclaimed, hugging him around the legs.
"It was all Carina, Ness," Jacob told her, and his lips curled up into a smile when she shot Carina (who was currently adjusting one of her gloves) a wide eyed look.
No one quite expected it to happen.
Even Alice herself hadn't seen it.
Renesmee was off like a shot and barrelling into Carina, who staggered back into the snow, Teddy landing on her head.
Renesmee lay sprawled across her stomach, excitement fading and replacing itself with fear as Carina only lay there, Teddy across her face, arms and legs spread out wide.
Then, ever so slowly, the witch lifted the boy off of her and sat up, Renesmee scrambling away as quickly as she could. It was obvious she was trying to make a hasty escape, cheeks burning, but Carina reached out to snag her ankle, causing the girl to trip and fall again.
"Don't even," she sharply told Renesmee, who had begun to struggle to her feet again. Carefully, Teddy was sat down in the snow.
"I'm sorry," Renesmee blurted, eyes widening further. "I-I didn't mean to, it's just, I've wanted the swing up for awhile and I was so excited and Jake said you did it and I wanted to thank you but I didn't think and—"
"Stop."
The one word cut off the rambling half-vampire, who shrunk under the intense gray gaze.
Jacob marched forward, ready to defend his imprint, and the other Cullens had tensed as well, even Rosalie, who was anxious as to how this would turn out. Her mate did not look very happy, even ready to tear into the child, and it was not good.
"Come here."
Shakily, Renesmee crawled over to Carina, whose stony expression did not change, even as she beckoned the girl closer.
Then, the witch crossed her legs and shifted to face the child, who swallowed.
"I'm not touchy," Carina informed firmly. "And I don't like surprises. I put up your swing because Teddy wanted it. Understand?"
"Yes," Renesmee deflated. "I'm sorry…"
Carina's face did not soften, and her eyes were still hard and stormy as ever, but she reached out and, ever so gingerly, ruffled the child's hair.
Renesmee had at first flinched as though waiting to be struck (this had caused a very tense Edward to start down the steps, only to be stopped by Esme), and then froze.
She still sat there now, bewildered and shocked and unable to move, until Carina's hand, which ran through her hair only once more, drew away.
"Go swing," the witch told the girl quietly. "Take Teddy with you. Have fun."
Renesmee seemed to move automatically, scooping the boy in her arms and almost mechanically making her way toward Jacob and the swing. Gradually, however, her eyes widened as she realized what had transgressed, and as she climbed onto the swing and Jacob plopped Teddy onto her lap, reached up to touch her hair.
Carina sat alone in the snow, elbows on her knees, and watched as they swung back and forth, her son squealing in delight yet again.
Emmett bounded out and plopped down beside her, causing her to glance over briefly, quirking a brow.
"Snow angels?" Emmett offered with a grin.
Carina rose her brow higher, stood, and promptly strode into Rosalie's waiting arms, leaving Emmett pouting behind her.
"Let's go somewhere," she said suddenly.
"We went on a date just the other day," Rosalie reminded softly, running her hand through the windswept raven hair and allowing her fingers to rest on her mate's cheek, both of which were flushed from the cold. Her ears, too, were tinged pink.
"And?"
"I thought you'd have tired of my company already," the blonde smiled slightly at Carina, who shrugged.
"Only occasionally."
"Today isn't one of those days, is it?"
"No. Lucky you," Carina grabbed Rosalie's hand in her own and linked them.
"Well, where do you want to go?"
"I don't know. I've never been ice skating."
"What?" Alice, from behind them, gasped. Emmett, too, looked scandalized.
"I didn't know that," remarked Luna.
"We need to go now!" Alice exclaimed, bouncing in place and clapping her hands. "It's certainly a fun family activity, isn't it?"
Carina stared at her. For a moment, it seemed as though she were about to say no, but instead, what came out of her mouth was, "Can Leah come?"
"Well, if Jacob is tagging along with Nessie, I don't see why not," Jasper drawled, looking faintly amused.
Rosalie frowned. "Why should Leah come?"
Carina shrugged again, swinging their arms, but did not respond. She, it seemed, was already tired of speaking and was now content to watch and listen.
"Great!" Alice linked arms with Jasper. "Well, I think we should go tonight, out on the lake."
"At night?" Esme interjected, mildly concerned. "Do you really think that's the best, Alice?"
"Oh, don't worry, we'll be sure to string up some lights, dear," Carlisle rubbed her arm soothingly. "Everyone will have fun."
Rosalie was still frowning, unable to help herself as she nudged Carina, repeating again, "Why Leah?"
The raven haired girl glanced over at her, raising her brows, and then slipped away without a word to where Teddy was calling for her, his arms outstretched.
Emmett gave Rosalie a pointed, amused look and then meandered his way to Luna's side.
~~~xxx~~~
Ice skating was certainly a chaotic affair. Alice had managed to procure skates for everyone, despite the fact that Luna or Carina could have conjured or transfigured some, and now, they were out on the ice.
Esme could tell that Rosalie was not liking that she was not the one to teach Carina.
Instead, the raven haired girl was skating clumsily alongside Leah, who had no real idea of what she was doing, either. The both of them were shoving each other, purposefully being quite forceful, and though Esme winced when Carina was occasionally hit rather hard, the girl took it well.
She was even laughing, and Rosalie's face was contorting with every smile.
"Having trouble there, Wicked?" Leah teased, bumping Carina with her hip.
Carina, just barely managing to regain her balance as her arms flailed, glared. "Shut up, you worthless piece of sh—"
Leah abruptly clapped a hand over her mouth, hastily shaking her head and gesturing to Teddy, who squealed in Luna's arms nearby. "No no no, not again. Don't."
Esme frowned, wondering what they were talking about. Her poor daughter was looking the same.
Carina's eyes got wide, flickering from Rosalie to Luna and back. "I nearly forgot…"
"Well, don't."
The raven haired girl tugged hard on a lock of Leah's hair, hissing too lowly for Teddy or Luna to hear, "Bitch."
"Asshole," Leah growled back, and then stumbled when Carina stuck her leg out, hitting the ice hard when she fell. She was just about to curse far louder, but the witch waved her hand quickly, effectively and literally silencing her.
The shifter glowered, and Carina let up on the spell, shrugging. "Not worth the risk."
"I hate you, you know that?"
"Then why did you come?"
"As if," Leah snorted.
Carina's eyes narrowed, and from across the ice, Esme could see Rosalie's hands curl into fists, especially when the shifter yanked the witch down with her.
"That's not what I meant," Carina grunted, kicking her leg. Leah kicked back, and to the witch's credit, she did not flinch, though her nose did wrinkle.
"That's what you told me once, though," Leah pointed out, not seeming to care that Rosalie was currently growling. In fact, she was ignoring it, and Carina was too busy scowling to notice. "Remember? You said if you and blondie weren't mates, you'd totally do me."
"Sadly for you, we are," Carina managed to struggle to her feet. Graceful as she was, if there was one thing she was not good at, it seemed, it was ice skating. "And, besides, what I said was that you're attractive, and if I hadn't have known Rosalie, I would have made drunken passes at you."
The words themselves were enough to make Rosalie's control seem to snap, and Jasper and Emmett had to intercept her quickly. She was hissing furiously, black eyes directed at Leah, who raised her brows and held up her hands in surrender.
Esme supposed the shifter hadn't meant to antagonize the vampire, only to rile her friend up (as Carina and Leah did when together), but it had certainly done just that. Rosalie looked nothing less than furious.
Carina stopped abruptly, realizing what she had just said and who it had been said in front of, it seemed. Her eyes cut across the lake to Rosalie, and without looking away, allowed Leah to clasp her forearm and pull the shifter to her feet.
"Give me a hand?" she muttered.
Leah silently righted Carina and gave her a hard push, sending her skating fast across the ice and straight for her angry mate.
Emmett reached out to stop her before she crashed, and Carina did not bother thanking him, only maneuvered her way over to Rosalie, who had been released.
Esme and the others could only watch.
"Rose," Carina carefully reached out a hand, and dark eyes followed the movement, the blonde not once moving when it landed on her cheek. "You have to calm down. I didn't mean that."
"It certainly sounded like you did," Rosalie hissed. "She was quite happy pointing it out."
"No," the raven haired girl corrected, her voice cracking in a way that betrayed her instinct to growl back. "I said that if I hadn't have known you, I might have. Not that I would have, or that I ever will."
"You called her attractive!"
"And? She is. Anyone with eyes can see it. It doesn't mean I'm attracted to her."
Leah meandered her way to Esme's side, uneasy as she watched, mumbling to herself, "I always find a way to fuck everything up, don't I?"
Rosalie's eyes darkened even further, if possible, making her look quite possessed. "Carina…"
It was obviously a warning, but Carina did not remove her hand, nor did she avert her eyes, and Esme felt a small surge of pride at that. Rosalie had the capacity to be very frightening when she wished.
It was also rather brave of the witch to say, ever so calmly, "Jealousy doesn't suit you."
Rosalie's nostrils flared. "Sometimes, I just want to…"
"Shag me? I understand completely. I look in the mirror everyday and think the same."
"You're ridiculous."
"Yes."
"Foolish."
"Yes."
"Idiot."
"I'm your idiot," Carina drummed her fingers on Rosalie's jaw, slow smirk tugging at her lips. "Now, love, I'd like to continue skating. I keep making a fool of myself and I need a better instructor than my last one. Teach me?"
Esme watched as Rosalie's eyes lightened, though only marginally at first, as she closed her eyes. Carina's smirk (arrogant as it had looked) had slipped away, and she cupped the blonde's cheek, eyes roving over her face.
That was something Esme had always loved about the two. No matter how furious with one another, how terribly they fought, they were always soft with one another. She had yet to see Rosalie raise a hand to Carina, or Carina draw her wand on Rosalie.
She doubted if they ever would.
Carina's guard, now as well as usual, was down. Though it was always that way with Luna, with Rosalie, she seemed to positively melt. One look from the blonde vampire could make the raven haired witch's heart stutter; Esme had heard it on numerous occasions.
Like right now, in fact. When Rosalie had opened her now golden eyes, Carina's heart had skipped a beat, whether she realized it or not, and now, the two were hand in hand, the latter tugging the former out onto the ice.
Esme leaned into Carlisle, who had finally made his way to her side, and smiled as she watched the two.
Rosalie looked at Carina like she was the only person in the world.
Carina looked at Rosalie as though she were a goddess meant for worship.
Esme was happy, more than anything, that they had found each other.
~~~xxx~~~
Alright, so perhaps things weren't going quite as well as Renesmee thought they could have lately. Things had been so perfect...she should have known something bad would happen. Intelligent as she was being a hybrid, she was still a child and naive to many things; she'd thought nothing terrible would ever touch them.
That was certainly wrong.
She swallowed, clasping her hands together as she listened to her family speak over one another, realizing the implications of what she had done. Though it had been accidental, Irina had seen her, and now, the Volturi would come down upon them all.
It scared Renesmee, if she were to be frank. Terrified her. She loved her family more than anything, and she did not want to die, either, far from it.
The only person not speaking was Carina, who was sitting alone at the other end of the couch, wand tapping her knee, eyes not once leaving Rosalie as she bickered with the others. Teddy sat in his playpen across the room, blissfully unaware and giggling as he played with his toys.
Carina tapped her wand again, harder this time when an irate Jacob argued, "We can just fight them all!" and sparks shot out of it.
Startled, Renesmee jumped slightly, jostling the older girl and causing gray eyes to snap abruptly to her. The look on Carina's face made her regret ever entering the room in the first place.
"Would you like me to drop Teddy off at Andromeda's?" Luna asked, leaning over the back of the couch, arms draping loosely over Carina's shoulders.
Slowly, the raven haired girl looked away and glanced up at her friend, sighing. "It would be for the best, wouldn't it?"
"You're a good mother," Luna stroked Carina's hair, soft smile in place. "You might not think it, but you are. Sending him away means there's no chance he's in danger."
The other witch made a noncommittal noise and watched as Luna crossed the room and lifted Teddy into her arms. The poor boy looked confused, even as they popped away, and then Carina's eyes were on Renesmee again.
"We'll have to do something," Carlisle spoke quietly to the others. "Speak to our friends, perhaps, as much as I would hate to bring them into this…"
"Witnesses," Edward realized. "Yes, that might work."
"We'll have to contact them immediately," Esme murmured. "How much time do we have left, Alice?"
"A month at most," Alice spoke lowly.
Everyone's voices overlapped again, and Renesmee could feel her stomach fluttering nervously at the thought of all this.
Carefully, she stood, mumbling, "I think I'll go for a walk."
"I'll come with you," Jacob hurriedly made to follow.
"You're needed here to discuss things," Bella reminded, shaking her head. "I'll go."
"You're needed here as well," Jasper raised a brow at her. "We all are."
Renesmee stood there, looking between each of her family members in turn, the anxiousness she had previously felt gnawing at her with every moment she couldn't get some air.
Before she could so much as open her mouth again, however, a shadow loomed over her, and when she turned, there was Carina Black, right behind her.
"I'll take her," the witch said without preamble, tone brooking no room for argument. She did not look at anyone, nor speak again as she strode out the doorway, obviously expecting to be followed.
Hastily, Renesmee did so, trying to match her long strides as they made their way through the forest.
"I'm sorry about Teddy," Renesmee could not stop herself from apologizing. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen…"
Carina kept moving, almost as if she were ignoring the girl at first, before abruptly stopping and dropping unceremoniously onto a log.
"It wouldn't be the first time," she chuckled darkly. "The amount of things we've been through before you were born...the things I've been through...this kind of thing is normal. To be expected. If it didn't happen, I don't think I would be me."
Carefully, Renesmee perched a respectable distance away, swallowing. "I don't want them all to die because of me. I-I didn't think...I thought we'd always be safe, and happy."
"I was never safe," Carina said. "Or happy."
The hybrid jerked in surprise at that. "Y-You weren't? But, what…"
"Not everyone loves a child as much as they do you," Carina's tone was rather wry. "And we'll leave it at that for now."
Perhaps, thought Renesmee, that was why Carina was so rough around the edges. Because she had never truly had anyone to love her before, or because when she finally did, it had not ended well.
She did not dwell on it, however, still consumed by her own fear, and realized that she was trembling as she blurted, "I'm scared!"
Carina's eyes found hers, and Renesmee could feel tears begin to form, unable to help it.
"W-Will everything be okay, Carina? Will everyone be okay?"
The witch stared at her for another moment, before bluntly replying, "Probably not."
That had Renesmee choking, the response still quite too truthful for her at the moment, and she could feel her cheeks grow wet and her body quiver harder.
There was a loud, heavy sigh from beside her, and when Renesmee glanced up, Carina Black was sitting quite close to her, holding her arm out with a resigned air.
Child as she was, Renesmee did not think twice about throwing herself into the witch, who grunted and wrapped an arm around her shoulders nonetheless.
"I-I'm sorry," the hybrid hiccupped, lifting her head after a few moments, feeling horrified at what she'd done. "You don't like being t-touched!"
"Be quiet," Carina told her, softer than Renesmee had ever heard before, though nonetheless commanding. It made her do as she was told and listen, though wide eyed. "What's done is done. We'll take care of it."
"But wh-what if they hurt Mom, or Dad? What if they want to-to kill me?"
"They won't."
"But how do you know?" Renesmee pressed, unable to help it in her worry, detaching herself.
"Because I won't let them!"
The sudden, loud, and rather harsh words had Renesmee jerking away on instinct.
Carina reached out and yanked the hybrid back into her side, fingers digging hard enough into Renesmee's arm to get her attention.
"I won't let them," she repeated, calmer. "Where Rosalie goes, I go, inevitably. If she goes to war, so will I, and if the others need protecting, there I'll be. Do you understand?"
"Yes," slowly, the child nodded, before hesitantly asking, "But what about me?"
"You?"
"Will you...I mean, would you protect me, too?"
Carina snorted. "I liked it better when you were crying. Yeah, I would."
"But…" Renesmee frowned. "I thought you don't like me? And that you don't want to be my aunt?"
The woman looked as though she were going to say something sarcastic, but then stopped herself and clenched her jaw for a moment.
"I don't want to be your aunt," she admitted, and Renesmee, in her state of mind, marveled at how pretty Carina and Luna's respective gray and silver eyes were. Luna's shone, but Carina's were endless seeming, fascinating, despite lacking in color.
"Then why…"
"Because I never said I didn't like you."
The words had Renesmee starting, gazing up at Carina with wide eyes. "You like me?"
Carina wrinkled her nose, before answering (and not quite answering, as it was) her with, "No one will lay a hand on you so long as I'm around. I can promise you that."
"You like me?" still dazed as it was, Renesmee, awestruck, leaned into the witch and did not speak again. Instead, she reveled in the feeling of the woman, as she had been when they were on the broom. The steady heartbeat she heard comforted her (though it was not as strong as Jacob's), and as pine and vanilla filled her nostrils with each breath, her eyes began to droop.
"Great," she could hear Carina groan softly. "Just great."
It did not take long for Renesmee to drift off.
~~~xxx~~~
When Carina returned to the Cullen home, carrying Renesmee in her arms, there had been an uproar.
Edward had immediately thought she'd harmed his daughter, while Bella and Jacob both fretted over whether they were attacked. When it turned out that Renesmee was merely asleep, everyone could be seen looking incredibly relieved.
"Give her to me," Edward demanded, moving to remove his daughter from the witch's clutches.
Carina did not offer up any protest, but when a groggy Renesmee only curled closer to her chest, linking an arm around her neck, raised dark brows.
"I'll be back," the raven haired girl told them, though her attention was, mostly, directed upon Luna and Rosalie.
She could be heard ascending the stairs for the next few moments, and during the silence, Emmett could not help but wonder, "What happened?"
"I think Carina is warming up to her," Luna smiled, leaning into her mate's arm. Her eyes glittered. "Well, in her own way. She's quite stubborn, as you see."
"We realize," Jacob remarked dryly.
"Well, I'm glad," Esme, too, could not help but smile.
From upstairs, they could hear voices.
"Carina?" a bleary voice could be heard.
"Yeah?"
"How'd we…"
"Carried you. Go back to sleep, kid."
"M'kay…" there was a moment or more of silence. "C'rina?"
Soft footsteps hit their ears, presumably moving back to the doorway, as a resigned sigh sounded. "Yes?"
"Y'll protect me, right?"
The question startled everyone as they listened carefully for what would be said next.
"Course," said Carina easily, before her voice dropped to a lower tone as she firmly commanded, "Now sleep."
There was the soft rustle of sheets turning, and then Carina came sliding down the stair rail, landing with a thump on the floor below.
"What?" she raised a brow at the eyes trained upon her.
Edward went to open his mouth, but Emmett cut across him quietly, "Nothing."
He grinned at Carina, who only quirked her other brow in turn, snorting, before making her way to Rosalie, pressing an absent kiss to her cheek. Leaning against the wall beside the vampire, she glanced about.
"Well?" Carina folded her arms. "What are we going to do about the new war?"
"It won't come to that," assured Carlisle.
She scoffed. "Sure it won't."
"What happened with Renesmee?" Bella could not help but inquire, it seemed, as she leaned forward. "Is she alright?"
"What we discussed is private," Carina's sharp eyes cut across her and to Edward pointedly. "Though I'm sure he'll see it soon enough. She was worried, and I got through to her. It's as simple as that."
"What did you say to her?" Rosalie questioned softly, curious, as she took her mate's hand.
"Come hell or high water, where you go, I go."
Rosalie smiled at her.