Disclaimer: I do not own The Outsiders or 'On Call' by Kings of Leon
Thursday, June 9th, 1966
Steve watched the blonde woman in his kitchen scramble the eggs she was cooking. Her blonde - possibly from the bottle - hair was piled messily on her head and she had a cigarette dangling from her already painted lips. Had he been worried before, Steve knew now there was no need to be. Even if she wanted to - which she had made a point of telling him she didn't - there was no way Millie could come close to replacing his mom.
She could, however, stick around for a while so long as she continued cooking the way she did. He had come to realise that maybe she wasn't so bad after all. She was easy going, cooked up a storm, and he supposed she was nice enough.
"Eat up, kid," she said, placing a plate of scrambled eggs in front of him.
Glancing from the plate to the long piece of ash hanging from her cigarette, Steve pushed the plate back and stood from the table. She did have a bad habit of cooking eggs and smoking at the same time, though.
"Thanks," he muttered, "but I might grab somethin' with Anna."
Millie's eyes lit up. "You gonna bring her back around here anytime soon?"
The shine Millie had taken to Anna still amazed Steve. Sure, Anna was likable so long as she wasn't doing everything she could to annoy you, but he'd never thought anyone would be able to click with her so quickly.
"Hopefully I can convince her to come around tonight," he said with a smirk.
Millie gave him a smirk of her own. "Glory, kid. I've seen the way that girl looks at you; you could convince her to rob the bank downtown with ya if you tried hard enough."
That was one thing Steve didn't need to be told. He'd seen for himself the kind of things he could talk Anna into doing. Of course, those things had nothing to do with robbing banks downtown and everything to do with getting her undressed whenever possible.
Pushing those thoughts away so he didn't embarrass himself in front of Millie while thinking about his girlfriend without clothes, Steve grabbed his keys from the table, smirk growing.
"Yeah, well …" was all he said.
"You two doin' anything fun today?" Millie asked, pouring herself a coffee.
Steve frowned. He wasn't sure what he and Anna were going to do today, but he knew it wasn't going to be fun. In fact, it would probably be down right depressing, but he knew it had to be done.
Danny had cornered him the night before while Anna was in the shower. Though Steve was sure Danny wasn't impressed with him dating his little sister, the hostility that had been going back and forth between them a while back was gone and they got along well enough.
But hearing Danny say he was worried about Anna and how he didn't think she was really coping with their grandpa's death had put Steve in one hell of a mood. He knew Danny was right, and he knew that having not realised it himself made him a real shitty boyfriend. Anna's grandpa had only been dead six weeks; there was no way she was coping as well as she made out to be.
He'd never pegged Anna to be good at keeping things to herself before. Usually all he had to do was look at her and everything she was thinking or feeling came out loud and clear. Then again, he had gone weeks sitting next to her in math every day and not figured out how she felt about him. He supposed she wasn't that bad at hiding her feelings after all.
He was going to get them out of her, though. That was his plan for the day. He didn't know how, but he knew she needed to at least open up about her grandpa. Hell, he had done it when his mom had died and it had helped, now Anna had to do it, too.
He shrugged and looked at Millie. "We're s'posed to meet up with Two-Bit and Kathy." At least that's what he'd told Anna.
Millie nodded and went back to her coffee. "Sounds good, kid. See ya later."
Steve threw her a wave and left, remembering Danny's words from the night before as he climbed into his car and started for Anna's place.
"Look, I ain't askin' you to get her to talk or nothing," Danny had said, "just … make sure she's all right. I'd do it myself, but …" he had trailed off then, giving Steve a long look. "I think if she's gonna open up at all, it'll be to you."
He sure hoped Danny was right about that. It wasn't just guilt he was feeling, but worry. The last thing Steve wanted was Anna hurting more than she needed to be. He remembered how upset she had been the night her grandpa died and he hated it. He wanted her to be happy.
He just wasn't sure how to go about making it happen.
Sighing, he pulled up next to Anna's, leaning over to push open the door for her as she ran to the car.
"Hey," she said, before giving him a quick kiss. "Ready to go?"
He nodded, feeling like crap. He'd been too caught up in being with her and not caring about anything else when he should have known she would still be grieving. He should have known she wouldn't be over what had happened already.
Pulling away from the curb, he heard Anna sigh.
"I think it's gonna rain," she said, looking at the sky through the window.
"I think you might be right," he said.
She turned to look at him. "How's it goin' at home? With Millie?"
"It's okay, I guess. I don't like it, but Millie's not so bad. She's more bearable than Dad, anyway."
Anna nodded. "She's nice."
"Yeah, well …" he trailed off, a plan formulating in his mind. "How d'you feel about ditching Kathy and Two-Bit today?"
"Why?"
He shrugged. "Y'know, just to hang out together."
"Just the two of us?" Anna asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah."
She turned slightly in her seat and grinned at him. "You do realise it's not considered really hanging out if it takes place in your bedroom?"
Ignoring her, he reached across the seat, and took her hand. "I was thinkin' we could get breakfast at that truck stop and diner we stopped at that time."
Anna was silent for a few moments, thinking it over. Finally she said, "You really wanna skip out on Two-Bit and Kathy with me?"
Steve nodded and took in the smile she was sending him. He realised that even though it had technically been his idea, and even if he hadn't been worried about her, he probably would have skipped the country with her had she asked.
XXXXX
Anna wasn't sure what was going on. Why skip out on a great day with their friends? Sure, ten-pin bowling wasn't exactly her idea of a great time, but she was sure Two-Bit would make it interesting enough, and he was sure Steve had been keen for it. It made no sense to her.
In fact, it made so little sense that she was wondering just what Steve was up to. He had been giving her furtive looks every few minutes as though he really wanted to ask her something, or as though he was waiting for her to do something.
Sighing, Anna stabbed her fork into a fry as she and Steve sat in the same booth they had sat in months ago at the same diner. Changing her mind, she dropped the fork and looked at her boyfriend.
"What's goin' on?" she asked, crossing her arms over her chest.
Steve looked up from his Coke. "Whaddya mean?"
"I mean, why are we here? And, why are you looking at me as though something's goin' on that I don't know about?"
He smirked. "With brains like that, I don't know why you were failin' math."
"Ha-ha," she said sarcastically. "Now tell me what's goin' on. If you really just wanted to spend time together, I doubt you would've spent the last ten minutes not speaking to me."
His smirk turned into a smile and her heart thudded at the sight of it. It didn't happen often, but when Steve really smiled at her, she felt like dancing.
"I think we need to sort some stuff out," he said.
"What kinda stuff?"
"I think you know."
She frowned, thinking over anything that could possibly be wrong between the two of them. She wasn't a mind reader and didn't know if Steve had issues with her that she wasn't aware of, but the only things she felt she needed sorting out was her jealousy of Evie that hadn't disappeared like she had hoped, and her secret love for Steve.
But surely it wasn't either of those. She frowned, playing ignorant.
"I don't know what you mean."
Steve frowned and took out his comb, running it through his hair. "I realised last night that it's been about six weeks since your grandpa died."
She fidgeted in her seat. "So?"
"So," he said, reaching across and grabbing one of her hands, "I've only heard you mention him twice in that whole time."
Realisation washed over her and she felt sick. "You brought me here to talk about him?"
"No, I brought ya here for a late breakfast. I just happen to know you ain't coping as well as you claim to be, and think you should be talkin' about him." He paused. "And your brother agrees."
"He does, does he?" she asked, pulling her hand back.
Steve nodded. "He pointed it out to me last night, and once he did, I realised he was right." He paused again, narrowing his eyes at her and leaning back. "Gotta say, the fact that you ain't dealin' too well and didn't tell me sure made me feel like the world's worst boyfriend."
"You're … is - is that supposed to make me feel guilty?" she asked, voice slightly higher than normal.
Steve shrugged, and she knew he was guilting her into talking. Problem was, she also knew that he was dead right; she should talk about it … she just really didn't want to. Plus, it was hardly fair. Steve had his own problems to deal with, like his dad being a complete jerk. As far as Anna was concerned, he didn't need to deal with her shit, too.
If she were honest with herself, she also didn't want to open up that much. She had told him things in the past, but she hadn't had to really share her feelings about something this big … something that really hurt to think about, let alone talk about.
Glancing out the window next to them at the rain that was now coming down steadily, she felt a warmth come over her at how similar this was to the last time they had been there. It had been after spending that afternoon together that Steve had accepted their friendship. Their friendship might have been born the night they had been drinking in the empty lot, but the afternoon they had spent in the same diner they were in now had shown Anna she could rely on Steve.
He had proved that fact time and time again. He was there when she needed him; the night her dad hit her, the night Grandpa Joe had died, Grandpa Joe's funeral. She hated needing him - she hated needing anyone other than Danny who she had always relied on - but Steve had never complained or moaned about it.
In fact, he had told her to go to him if she needed to. He had come to find her at Buck's when he'd found out about Grandpa Joe, and he had come to the funeral without her even knowing. She knew she loved Steve and, even if she didn't know how he felt about her, she knew for certain she could rely on him.
She knew for certain that, if she was going to talk to anyone about Grandpa Joe, it was going to be Steve.
His hand slipped around her wrist, warm and reassuring.
"I ain't gonna push it," he said, "but I ain't gonna let it go, either."
She took a breath. "Will you come somewhere with me?"
He nodded once. "Anywhere."
Her heart thudded at the one word and she had to stop herself from throwing herself into his arms.
XXXXX
Steve pulled into the same car park he had used the day of the funeral, switched the car off, and waited.
He knew this was huge. Maybe not to some people, but he was dead certain Anna hadn't been back here since the day of the funeral she barely remembered.
He looked at her. "You don't have to do this."
"Hey, if I can follow you to your bedroom and start getting naked - knowing there was a chance you might turn me down - then I can do this."
Steve scoffed. "What chance of me turning ya down? I knew as soon as I saw you inside that I wouldn't turn you away again."
She was silent, and he reached for her hand.
"Seriously," he said. "We can come back and do this another time if ya want. I'll come back with you whenever you want."
She turned to look at him and he could see she was considering his offer.
"You don't have to rush this," he continued.
She frowned and still seemed to be thinking so he stayed silent. He wasn't going to push her into this, but he would go with her if she wanted him to.
"Do you visit your mom's grave?" she asked softly.
He had talked to Anna about his mom more than he'd talked to anyone else about her, but Steve's natural reaction to anything about his mom was to close up and tell whoever asked to fuck off.
"Sorry, you don't have to tell me," she said at his silence.
"It's okay," he muttered, slouching in the seat. And it was.
"You sure?"
"Yeah." He looked at her intently. "Nothin' should be off limits between us."
She nodded. "I agree."
"So, once I tell you about my mom, you gotta tell me something about your grandpa. It doesn't have to anything big, but you gotta talk a little."
He refused to make it a question. She knew it wasn't easy for him to talk about his mom and deep down she knew she needed to talk about her grandpa. If it meant him going first, then so be it.
But then her lower lip trembled and he almost took his condition back … almost.
"Okay," she said.
And looking into her green eyes, he knew it was okay. He felt more for Anna than he had for anyone. He knew he could trust her; had known it for some time. And not just with what he told her, but with his feelings.
He looked at her patiently watching him and sighed. "I visit my mom's grave once a year," he said. "On Valentine's Day."
Anna raised an eyebrow. "Valentine's Day?"
"Yeah, it was always her favourite holiday and, I dunno, it beats coming here on Christmas or Mother's Day when the place is crowded."
"Plus, if it was her favourite holiday then she'd probably like it more that you go then, right?" Anna asked.
Steve couldn't help the half smile that came from Anna's words. "Yeah, probably."
They were silent for a moment before Anna started talking again.
"Is it hard?" she asked, before frowning. "No, that's stupid. I know it's hard but …"
Steve was pretty sure he knew what she was asking. "It gets easier."
"But you still miss her, right? All the time?"
He nodded and swallowed. "Of course."
She sighed and he fought the urge to fidget in his seat as she watched him. He hadn't said much, but he had admitted more than he would have for anyone else. In the past it had always been simple facts about his mom that he'd shared with Anna, not feelings. He trusted her completely, but he was getting uncomfortable.
Glancing at her and seeing her frowning at him, he was about to put his defences back up and ask what her problem was, when she scooted forward and caught his lips in a kiss that made his heart speed up.
Kissing her back he tangled his hand in the hair at the back of her head and pulled her close, all the bad feelings of talking about his mother leaving immediately. He loved kissing Anna, loved having her pressed against him like she was, and loved the way she was attempting to climb on to his lap, but for once his head was in the right place and he stopped her.
"You ain't gettin' out of talking that easily," he breathed.
She sighed and grinned a little. "Can't blame a girl for trying."
No, he couldn't. "Tell me what's goin' on," he said, keeping her close as she pulled away from him. "You don't have tell me everything, but you gotta talk about it a little."
She shrugged. "It's just hard. I really miss him, you know?"
He nodded; of course he knew.
"It's weird not being able to see him whenever I want. I used to visit him at least twice a week, now it's been six weeks without seeing him once and it's gonna be forever before I see him again." She paused. "It's really hard to get used to and it's always in the back of my mind that I'm never gonna see him again."
Steve's heart thudded when Anna lowered her head, hair curtaining her face.
"Please don't cry," he said quietly, reaching for her hand and moving right in front of her. "Any other girl crying I can handle, but you crying is damn near torture."
And it really was. Glory, but he cared about her. Just the idea that she might cry was killing him.
She looked at him and smiled softly. He was pleased to see her eyes dry.
"You've seen me cry before."
"Yeah, and it's been shit each time. Especially the first time when it was me who made you cry." He frowned at the memory, hating himself a little, before continuing. "I hated seeing ya cry."
"I'm not going to cry," she said, and leaned into him, draping her leg over his.
He sighed. "I'm glad, but … you know, it's okay if you do."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. I'll hate it, but I won't leave ya to do it by yourself." He wondered if that was as close as he could come to telling her he'd be there for her.
Anna pursed her lips and frowned at him as if having a silent debate with herself. Raising an eyebrow, Steve waited, pretty sure she was trying to decide what to say next. Finally she looked away and sighed.
"That's pretty good of you," she said.
"You okay?" he asked, thumb stroking the skin of the knee she had resting on his own.
She nodded. "Yes."
"You wanna hop outta the car?" He didn't want to outright ask if she wanted to visit her grandpa's grave. It didn't quite sound right.
"No," she said, shaking her head. "I think I was hoping it would help me, but the idea of going up there isn't at all appealing."
He decided not to push her. She hadn't said a whole lot, but she had opened up to him, and he was pretty sure it had helped.
"You wanna go for a drive?"
"A drive sounds good," she agreed.
He kissed her once, before starting the car and heading away from the cemetery.
As they drove back toward the outskirts of town, he thought about his whole relationship with Anna. It was different from anything he had ever experienced with a girl, different to anything he had ever thought he would experience with a girl. He had never worried this much about Evie, never tried this hard to make her feel better, never felt like his heart was being ripped out from seeing her cry … it wasn't a bad thing, he supposed, just different.
He briefly wondered what the guys would say or do if they knew how he was acting, if they knew he had pushed Anna away not twenty minutes ago to because he thought that her talking about what was upsetting her was more important than him getting laid.
Mentally shrugging, he figured the guys would never know about it anyway. This kind of behaviour only happened when he and Anna were alone and, with how private Anna was about personal things, he knew she preferred it that way as much as he did. Plus, for all he knew, they treated their girls exactly the same way when alone. Well, maybe not Dallas, but there must have been a good reason Kathy kept taking Two-Bit back. And Soda - he smirked - Soda had the biggest heart of all of them and he couldn't help but show it when Sandy was around.
"Steve?" Anna's voice was soft and he glanced at her as he drove. "Thanks for … everything."
"You don't have to thank me. I'd do it whenever."
"You're not the world's worst boyfriend," she said. "In fact, you were pretty amazing before."
He shrugged. "Well … I'm always pretty amazing."
"Yeah," she agreed softly, eyes shining in a way that made Steve's heart beat a million times faster, "you are."
A/N: Thanks to RileysMomma for beta-reading. Also thanks to the perfect imperfection for assuring me that Steve wasn't being - and I quote - "unbearably sweet ... in an overdone, sappy way," lol. I do hope you all agree with her - if not, feel free to let me know :) Please review.