CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
(chapter title – Severus' Suicide)
Severus continued walking the deserted streets until he came to a bridge overlooking the river Seine.
"Who is this man?
What sort of devil is he?
To have me caught in a trap
And choose to let me go free?
It was his hour at last
To put a seal on my fate
Wipe out the past
And wash me clean off the slate!
All it would take was a flick of his knife
Vengeance was his
And he gave me back my life!
Damned if I'll live in the debt of a thief!
Damned if I'll yield at the end of the chase
I am the Law and the Law is not mocked!
I'll spit his pity right back in his face
There is nothing on earth that we share
It is either Black or Severus!
How can I now allow this man
To hold dominion over me?
This desperate man whom I have hunted
He gave me my life, he gave me freedom.
I should have perished by his hand
It was his right
It was my right to die as well
Instead I live, but live in hell!
And my thoughts fly apart
Can this man be believed?
Shall his sins be forgiven?
Shall his crimes be reprieved?
And must I now begin to doubt
Who never doubted all these years
My heart is stone and still it trembles
The world I have known is lost in shadow.
Is he from heaven or from hell?
And does he know
That granting me my life today
This man has killed me even so?
I am reaching, but I fall
And the stars are black and cold
As I stare into the void
Of a world that cannot hold
I'll escape now from that world
From the world of Sirius Black
There is nowhere I can turn
There is no way to go on!" Severus sang. He got on top of the bridge, took a step and closed his eyes as he threw himself into the river. His body was taken under the waves.
The only thing that survived the fall was his blue hat.