Theme: 97. Safety First
Pairing: AbsolxAbsol (AbbonxOpheliac, TorturedDarknessShipping)
Summary: Giving an Absol that had just come from a fight a bath? Not the safest idea...
Rating: T for swearing, because Abbon is a filthy mouth.

AN: Welcome back to the world inside mine and Regii's minds!

Thanks for helping me write this, love!

"Abbon, bath time."

"FUCK NO, KEEP AWAY FROM ME!"

It was chaos as usual in that one house in Blackthorn City. On this particular day, the queen of the household decided her newest family member, a stubborn and harsh male Absol, needed a bath. Everyone had to agree with her; he smelled of blood and dirt after encountering and getting into a fight with another Absol. The kids of the household were not meant to see that and even his own mate was wrinkling her nose in disgust.

But at the moment, all she wanted was cake.

"Can't we wait until after?" Opheliac asked. She was eyeing the cake the resident Flygon, Vaporeon and Blissey threesome made. It was tall and wide, big enough for everyone in the house to eat.

"No." Star shook her head. "I want him clean NOW." She glared at the filthy Absol, who glared right back at her. "March your ass upstairs, Abbon."

"NO."

"DO IT."

"NO!"

"DO IT!"

At that moment, the king of the household walked in and recoiled at both the scent and the sight of Abbon. "Geez, what happened to you? You're filthy!"

"None of your business, human!" Abbon scowled. Cam, the king of the household, scowled back.

"Go have a bath, Abbon. You can't let the others see you like this!"

"Why not?" Abbon snapped. "I don't fucking care how I look!"

"Well I do!" Star snapped back. "You smell like Sirius when he's been playing in the mud!" she added, referring to her crazy Arcanine. The truth was Abbon had just gotten out of a fight from someone from his past in the Sinnoh Underground, where he had bad memories. The Absol called himself Soru and wanted to kill humans as revenge for killing off their pack, abusing them and making them fight to the death. He had even targetted Star and threatened to 'have' Opheliac, which enraged Abbon enough to make him kill. Though he would never admit it, Abbon had two important women in his life and if he lost either of them, he wouldn't know what to do. Probably revert back to his old ways of being rude and insulting everyone.

But that didn't stop him from disrespecting his mistress now. He HATED baths!

"I'll only go if Opheliac agrees to come too. Otherwise, kiss my ass."

"Well that's a switch," Star said, folding her arms and glaring. "You saved my life earlier and now you wanna backtalk me?"

"She's your new master," Cam reminded Abbon. "Pay her SOME respect." Abbon snarled in response. Star took the opportunity to pick Abbon up and head upstairs.

"Come on, Opheliac!" she called.

Opheliac, despite being a 'depressed little girl' was laughing all the way up the stairs. To her, watching her mistress pick up and carry her mate up to the bathroom like he was a baby was hilarious. Abbon glared at her while struggling against his mistress's arms.

"This ain't funny, babe...OI! I'm still aching, you know!" Abbon yelped. Star rolled her eyes.

"Then you'll be wanting a bath even more then."

"What for?"

"The warm water will soothe your aches. Now quit acting like a baby." Abbon growled dangerously at that and Star raised her eyebrows. "Do I need a suit of armor to give you a bath? Are you going to attack me too? My safety does come before this."

"In that case," Abbon began, but Opheliac gave him a glare.

"Don't you dare, Abbon."

The male Absol sighed in defeat. "Someone kill me," he thought. He couldn't win against women.

Star finally got through the bathroom door with Opheliac and quickly shut and locked the door before Abbon could even think of escaping. She started to run the water and search the cupboards for her canine shampoo. Opheliac took the moment to question her mate about bath time.

"Why do you hate baths so much?" Abbon stared at her like she was insane, but Opheliac kept going. "Mistress gives us massages while she bathes us. They feel nice and makes it worthwhile."

"I don't like water," Abbon snapped.

"You're not getting blasted by water like you would in a battle," Star piped up. "I COULD have asked Ven or Watery to hose you down instead," she added, referring to her Vaporeon and Milotic. "Or throw you in a cold pond with a bar of soap."

Abbon grumbled to himself and Star took the opportunity to grab him again and dump him in the water. He came up sputtering and coughing, but he soon became very unnerved by his mistress's grinning face.

"What the HELL was that for?"

"Bath time," Star simply answered. She poured the soap over Abbon's body, ignoring his growling and glaring. If she was anyone else, Abbon would have torn them to bits...she obviously wasn't thinking about her safety. Or maybe she was and just trusted him. The feeling was odd and unfamiliar to Abbon. Opheliac came up the side of the tub and giggled.

"It's not so bad, is it?" She was met by more growling. "Oh come on, it's not gonna hurt."

Abbon started to say something else, but Star began to massage his weary body. His growling lessened and he looked up at her. "I'm...not enjoying this, you know. And I'm still fucking furious at you for making me do this."

"I know," Star said, continuing to massage. "But I'd rather put up with your moodiness and anger than the smell of blood and dirt in the house."

Opheliac decided to try another tactic. She wiggled her rear end and said, "Oh Abbon, you big baby...after all this is said and done and you're a good Absol, we can have fun together..." She smiled slyly as she said this.

"I do NOT want to hear that," Star grumbled. She started to dig her fingers into Abbon's muscles, but still earning a protest from Abbon.

"I'm still not happy with this, you know! Baths are...horrible...I hate them..."

"Blah blah blah, suck it up," Star snapped. "You're so tense. Is it from the fight? The bath? Or are you always tense?"

"Always tense," Opheliac supplied. Her mistress snorted and Abbon went from mad to miffed. Although Star was not a massage therapist, she had a gentle touch that felt good on his tired body. He shuddered and finally relaxed but still regarded Star with a cold look. Opheliac had to laugh again. She couldn't help it; he was so damn full of pride! And he was letting his pride get in the way of enjoyment. Star regarded him with a frown, taking his silence as more anger.

"Well, at least you're not attacking me. Good thing too, because we don't really have a suit of armor for me to wear."

"I'm not attacking you, because you're my mistress," Abbon replied. "And because Opheliac's here," he added, glancing at his mate.

Star began rinsing him off with a slightly sad look. "...one of these days, Abbon, I hope you make the choice to not attack me for who I am as a human, not because of Opheliac or because I'm your mistress. You know I'm not a bad human. You even admitted it."

Abbon was silent as she rinsed him off but he knew Opheliac was staring at him with an icy look. She regarded her mistress with respect and love after she rescued her from a hunter. And she wanted her mate to feel the same way.

"Fine, I give," Abbon spat. "You're not a bad human...but dragging me up the stairs was uncalled for." Star rolled her eyes, shut off the water and grabbed a towel. But before she could dry Abbon off, he jumped out of the water and shook himself off, getting water all over her and Opheliac.

"Got you."

"HEY!" Star yelped and Opheliac growled in protest. "I did NOT drag you! I carried you up like the big baby you are! Now you're gonna get it for getting my clothes wet!" She then pounced on Abbon roughly and toweled him. Opheliac grinned as well and pounced on her mate. Unfortunately, Abbon took the opportunity to swing his scythe and it got hooked with Opheliac's own scythe, which pressed their heads together. Star wound up on the floor with the towel over her face from Abbon's sudden tantrum.

"This is awkward...mistress!" Opheliac wailed.

"Problem?" Star took the towel off her face and grinned. Opheliac and Abbon just glared at her and she laughed. "YOU MAAAAAD?"

"JUST FIX THIS."

"Fine..." Star moved Abbon's head forward to unhook their scythes and unintentionally pressed their faces together. Abbon's lips touched Opheliac's and both Absol blushed at the unexpected contact. Star watched them with a bemused expression and Opheliac fidgeted. "Oh come on, Abbon, you kissed her in front of a room full of people before. Stop acting shy - both of you. Especially you, Miss Seducer," Star added, looking at Opheliac. Both Absols blushed and looked away.

"So, Mister-I-Hate-Water-What-The-Fuck-Are-You-Doing-To-Me, how was bath time with your new mistress?"

"I didn't like it," he replied with a nasty tone. But his tone softened when Star glared at him again. "But...it wasn't as bad as when the lunkhead tried to bathe me...perhaps I could put up with another one, if I had to..."

"Good," Star's glare changed into a smile and she opened the door. "Come on, stinkies, let's go get cake." She ran out before either of them had a chance to catch what she said.

"STINKIES?" Opheliac yelled. "I AM NOT!"

"DAMNIT MISTRESS, I'LL FUCKING THROTTLE YOU!" Abbon added. Both Absols raced after their mistress in a laughing rage. They caught up with her downstairs and knocked her down so hard, her cake flew up in the air and landed on her face.

It was quiet. The pokemon and Cam were doing their best not to laugh. Star grumbled to herself, pushed the two Absols off her and stood up. She licked some of the icing and cake off her face. "Hmm...this cake is great. It's so delicious and moist."

How many references did you catch here? There's at least three. ;D I'll list them here:

-Ven, my Vaporeon's name. It's the same name as Ventus from Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep (my love's favourite game as well).

-"PROBLEM?" "U MAAAAAAAD?" Trollface and the epic ways of trolling. Go look at memebase, IT'S FUNNY.

-"This cake is great. It's so delicious and moist." I'm sure a lot of people might know this. It's from the ending theme from the game called Portal. (Still Alive by Jonathan Coulton, look it up on YouTube. People call it the best video game ending ever.)

I know I said I wasn't going to do anymore rp based ones, but I couldn't help myself. I LIED, OKAY? ):

I know what's next. I'm going to finally finish that little DracoShipping tale I started way way way back in chapter...FOUR? Holy crap, I have to finish it.

You know, looking back on all the progress I made, it's amazing how much my writing and plans had changed. At first this was just a legendaryxlegendary collection, but then I started to write humans as well and regular pokemonxpokemon. Then, of course, I read PokeSpe and I had MOAR pairings I wanted to write (RedxYellow~). I've noticed an overall change in how I write as well. I would DEFINITELY recommend doing a challenge like this to people with enough will and grit to keep going. 100 themes is really tedious, but no one said you don't have to shorten it. You would be amazed at how your writing seems to change as well and it's also incredible what these prompts can provide as inspiration. Also, writing a lot of unheard of couples was fun (GretaxTucker, EinxVenus, MIROR BXSALSA MUSIC, LOL).

Eh, this author's note stretched on too far. Also, I don't think I matched the theme with the story too well...damnit. OH WELL.