The Obama Tales is recorded in front of a live studio audience

Scene 1:

Open an empty stage. The stage is large, approximately the size of the United States, and contains about a lot of people. But that's not the important part. Entering stage left is Obama and his merry gang of politicians. Rand Paul who is with them seems to be carrying a shovel because they were digging a tunnel before. The curtain raises. The curtains are green like the setting sun. They symbolize Obama's bravery.

Obama: I can't believe I was underground. That's almost as cool as space.

Ron Paul: I can't believe that the Mole People made Bernie Sanders their king, and then Bernie Sanders dismantled the monarchy seconds later bringing peace throughout the land.

Jeb!: I can't believe it's not butter! Jeb! pauses, anticipating laughter from the studio audience which does not come. Please Laugh.

Obama: In any case, we're back home, which means that, uhhhhh, we're almost there.

Bernie Sanders: We can't take it easy just because we're on the inside, I'm sure He has many more obstacles for us to face.

Obama: I think our best course is to stock up on supplies. Does anyone know where the local shoppe is? The five look around, but see no buildings. None of them even know what state they are in, but it might be Washington, or perhaps Oregon.

Enter Starbucks, stage right

Jeb!: Oh good, a Starbucks, we must be in Seattle.

Rand Paul: This particular chain is native to Seattle. We should approach cautiously as to not scare it away.

Obama approaches the Starbucks cautiously, as to not scare it away.

Obama (to Starbucks): Yeah, uhhhh, can me and my uhhhh, fellow Americans, have uhhh, a Coffee?

The Starbucks, however, remains silent, for it has been trained not to talk to strangers.

Obama: Oh

Ron Paul: You can't give up that quickly! If my Libertarian forefathers taught me anything, it's that you can't give up, even if the odds are against you! Ron Paul approaches the Starbucks. I would like to purchase a coffee.

The Starbucks is unfazed.

Jeb!: You're both going about this the wrong way. Jeb! approaches the Starbucks. Hey friend, can we have a coffee please.

Speedwagon: AHH! JEB! ADDRESSES THE STARBUCKS AS A FRIEND! THIS TACTIC WAS NOT USED BY OBAMA OR RON PAUL, WHICH IS WHY THE STARBUCKS TOOK THEM TO BE THREATS! BUT JEB!'S CARING NATURE IS WHAT WILL WIN OUR HEROES A COFFEE! It seems like my work here is done, Speedwagon withdraws coolly.

Speedwagon withdraws coolly, stage left.

The Starbucks hands Jeb! a coffee, which they drink.

Bernie Sanders: Does this coffee taste suspicious to any of you? I don't know what it is, it just ain't right.

Rand Paul (spitting out his drink): positively unconstitutional!

Suddenly laughter emerges from the Starbucks.

Laughing Man: You FOOLS! You have fallen for my Trap!

Obama: No we haven't! Obama tries to hide the coffee cup from the voice.

Laughing Man: It's too late! You have all consumed the beverage, and will be under the control of my power; London Callingu!

The Starbucks takes off its disguise revealing itself to be none other than Nigel Farage.

All: Gasp

Nigel: That's right, I was the Starbucks the whole time! And you have consumed coffee created by my power!

Ron Paul: What does your power do?

Nigel: Why would I tell you that, just wait and see.

Obama: That's not how it works. Uhhhh, the Geneva convention clearly specifies that you must explain your abilities after and or during their usage.

Nigel: That's a stupid rule, but rules is rules. I shall tell you then. London Callingu, once consumed, will cause all of your organs to leave your body one by one. At first you shall feel pain, perhaps in your stomach. In an effort to alleviate the pain your stomach will exit your body! You cannot stop London Callingu once it has begun, it is already too late for you! He laughs.

Jeb!: No please. I like my stomach where it is.

Obama starts to pose: Heh heh, I suspected that you would do something like this. That is why before any of us drank your coffee, I replaced it with this coffee that I bought before coming here! Obama dramatically reveals the Starbucks coffee, undrank.

Nigel: Na-NANIIIIIII!

Obama: You see, the coffee tasted bad because it was weeks old! London Callingu will have no affect on us!

Bernie Sanders: Rand just passed out, I don't think your coffee was safe to drink…

Obama: Let me guess, your next line will be; Then where did my coffee go?

Nigel: Then where did my coffee g- NANI!

Obama: It's right here! Obama holds up the coffee and throws it on the grass under Nigel.

Nigel: You missed!

Obama: No you

Nigel: what

Suddenly the grass blades shoot up at Nigel, who takes sever damage.

Obama: The grass roots absorbed the coffee, causing them to exit the US! Just as I calculated, it caused them to fire directly at you! You were defeated by your own power!

Bernie Sanders: I think we need to get Rand to a hospital

Nigel: I- I can't believe it. The power of London Callingu being used against me. Heh, you're not bad, but you must realize there's no hope.

Obama: That's where you're wrong kiddo. I AM Hope!