This takes place after Changeling – kudos to Chris Judge for some excellent writing. Everyone always writes about this episode and how wonderful Daniel's actions were. I had a slightly different reaction, and so does Jillian.

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Teal'c woke, which was unusual enough in itself as he rarely if ever slept. He vaguely remembered Janet Fraiser saying she had given him enough sedative to knock out a brace of mules (whatever that was) and Daniel Jackson telling him to sleep and everything would be fine when he woke up.

One hundred years of Jaffa instinct told him it was very early in the morning and that someone was sitting beside him. His own body told him to resist any sudden movement. He was certain he had more muscle aches than he had muscles, which was also unusual for a Jaffa.

He glanced sideways to find that the 'someone' was Jillian. She had her head pillowed on her arms, her eyes closed and a worried frown creasing her forehead. If she was asleep, it was not peaceful. He moved his arm slightly and Jillian's SGC honed instincts brought her upright.

She blinked and brushed her hair out of her eyes.

"Did I wake you?" he asked, though it occurred to him that wasn't something he had thought he'd be asking Jillian. Ever.

"No," she shook her head and cleared the dryness in her throat, "no. Did I wake you?"

"Jaffa do not sleep," he informed her, with more than a touch of cultural pride in his carefully neutral tone.

"You were doing a fair impression of it then," she pointed out. She sat back and stretched the kink out of her back for a moment. "Jaffa don't live without symbiotes either, but you're doing a very good job of that too."

Teal'c considered that. He wanted to incline his head in acknowledgment but his sore neck refused to cooperate.

"Indeed," he finally said. "Why are you here, Jillian?"

"I couldn't sleep," she shrugged, "and, well, Daniel asked you to watch over me so I thought I would return the favor. Besides, I was afraid you would get out of bed AMA and come try to find me. I thought this would be easier on you. You've been taking this assignment to watch me pretty seriously."

"Are you going to get snarly about that again?" he asked.

A wise person would have fled the room when Teal'c used that tone of voice. Jillian just smiled a little. "Not tonight … or this morning… or whatever it is. You scared the hell out of me when you disappeared. I can tolerate a little fussing."

"I do not fuss," Teal'c growled.

Jillian regarded him quietly for a little while. She really was doing better. The members of SG8 had all been there for her as much as they could. She and Sam had created a small memorial to Daniel in the room at the house that should have been his office. Jillian knew she would never be able to use the room; and only she and Sam seemed to feel the need to memorialize him in some way.

But Teal'c – with no other family that concerned him and more experience with grief and loss than Jillian ever wanted to have – had intruded on her introverted solitude in ways no one else would dare. The rare appearance of her Scot/Irish temper fazed him as much as a wet bumblebee disturbed a mountain. He almost seemed pleased by it, as if temper was preferable to melancholy.

It was Teal'c who made sure she ate and unpacked the house and it was Teal'c who had taken care of Daniel's fish until she was ready to once again. It was Teal'c who appeared out of nowhere when the tears would suddenly returned – triggered by something as simple as finding the coffee mug that said 'Instant Archaeologist, just add coffee.' It was Teal'c who had dragged her to Home Depot and terrified the poor guy in the garden center until they had everything to start the rose garden out front that she had mentioned wanting once.

She was more grateful to him than she would ever be able to express and his disappearance really had scared the hell out of her.

"Is Janet going to release you today? The promotion ceremony is this afternoon. Scotty and Rusty will be very unhappy if I'm not there."

"I will be there," Teal'c promised. He seemed to hesitate for a moment. The last few weeks Jillian had seemed fine – not so emotionally brittle. But he had to know so he asked, "Have you ever seen Daniel Jackson, Jillian?"

She jumped a little, as if he had jabbed her with a pin. "Since he died? Or passed over or whatever it is he did?"

Teal'c looked at her with narrowed, serious eyes.

"Sometimes, I think, maybe," she whispered. Her reluctance to voice the thought was obvious. She pressed her hands flat between her knees, so hard Teal'c wondered if she was going to cause bruising, "There's never any way to be sure it isn't just a dream."

"He has come to you more than once?"

"I'm not sure he's ever come to me," she answered, "I think I always go find him. He's in this misty place, hiding he tells me, but I'm still not sure from what. Why, Tealc? Did you see him just now."

"Are you sure you want to know?" Teal'c asked.

No. "Yes." Still she hesitated and then added, "Only if you want to tell me."

The infirmary was still quiet in the early hours just before dawn and they were utterly alone for the moment. Teal'c chose to tell her everything from the ambush to his hallucination to Daniel telling him to sleep and all would be well. He focused on the ceiling as he spoke so he didn't see her expressions changing during the course of his tale. When he finally looked at her again he lifted his head from the pillow in surprise. There was twilight in her eyes and her skin was like moonlight.

"Something upsets you," he stated.

"Doesn't it upset you?" she demanded.

"Which part?"

The edge in her voice was a sharpened blade.

"All of it!" she snapped, "Teal'c! Does that sound like Daniel to you? Letting you walk into an ambush he must have known about? Standing around for days watching two of his friends dying? Watching? Daniel?"

"Jillian," Teal'c began in the most reasonable voice he could manage.

She cut him off.

"Don't make excuses for him," she said, "I know he's your friend and you love him but I was with Daniel in Russia when he was negotiating for your life. I know what that was putting him through. Teal'c, he destroyed Thor's Hammer for you. Jack left that choice totally up to him and he chose you over Sha're! We weren't even together then but I swear I never loved him more than I did when I heard that; and now he just stands around and lets you get ambushed and nearly killed? You and Bra'tac? What the hell is wrong with him?"

"He no longer sees things the same way, Jillian. He is an Ascended Being."

"So our lives don't matter to him anymore?" she sounded horrified. "It sounds more like he sold his soul for his continued existence."

Teal'c regarded her for a long time.

"You are extremely angry," he said, finally.

Jillian didn't answer him right away.

"I am," she said at last, "and I'm scared. I was fine being without him. It hurt, but if he was happy and he was having new and wonderful experiences then I could learn to be without him. But it sounds now as if he isn't even Daniel anymore, not the Daniel we knew."

She couldn't tell Teal'c about the vision Shifu had given Daniel, the one in which he had been given too much knowledge and descended into the darkest Abyss of his soul. That was up to Daniel to share. But what was he becoming now if he had been given this much power?

The room suddenly felt ice cold and she shivered. Ice cold like Daniel's temper; and she was suddenly afraid of what a man with that kind of temper and that much power could be capable of doing. Teal'c sat up, heedless of monitors and cables. Jillian was pale and looked like she was going to be sick. He wrapped a hand around her arm as an anchor.

"Jillian, it is possible it was all just part of my hallucination."

"Why would you hallucinate about Daniel acting totally unlike himself?"

"Until you pointed it out just now, I had not really thought about it," he told her.

Misery clawed at her. Over the months that had followed Shifu's vision Daniel had gradually shared other parts of the horror he had experienced. She knew what he had done to Teal'c, the violent and aggressive actions in which hitting and almost raping her had been the least of his sins.

That wasn't a vision. This was real. If Daniel could stand quietly and watch Teal'c struggle to survive, what was next? Her emotions battered her like a storm at sea.

Jillian looked into Teal'c eyes and tried not to feel so empty and alone.

"It's bad enough we've lost him," she said, in a voice coated with icy midnight, "Teal'c what if he's losing himself?"

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