A/N: Hello everyone. First I would like to say sorry for all the angst that has been happening in the story. There will be more but it's just a part of the plot. You get stronger when you go through trials. Before you can gain that strength and power you have to rise up and defeat the pain. So that is my reasoning for all the icky things going on. Oh In this chapter you will see Grimm becoming OOC. Forgive me. And Ichigo may be OOC a little but not much. So if that's okay with you then we're good! I hope you still like my story. I'm working hard to please everyone...hope I did okay! ^.^ anyways...here's the next chapter of Longing. ENJOY!

Ichigo

I got up after a few minutes and met up with the rest of my friends. Rukia was talking to E.J. who looked like he needed some sleep, Uuryu and Orhime were holding hands and whispering to eachother, chad was leanig on a post observing everything and Urahara was no where in sight. I clutched at my stomach. It was doing summersaults. I was nervous. I didn't like just sitting around here acting like nothing was wrong. I wanted to go after her. I knew how reckless and stupid it would be to go now...but I couldn't help it. I had to save her. Sure she went willingly but they tricked her into doing it. Orhime had been tricked too but this was different. They hadn't really wanted Inoue...they really wanted Kari. I stared up at the blue sky. It seemed so wrong that the sun was shining and the birds were chirping when something so terrible was happening.

then maybe you should switch me. My hollow offered.

What?

If you're that depressed that the sun is shinin then just switch me, cuz it's stormin like hell in here.

Sorry. I shook my head. Did I really just apologize to my hollow? Man where was my head today?

Probably the same place mine is.

And where is that?

Kari.

Why the fuck are you thinking about her? I growled.

Can't help it. Ever since that night she's been on my mind.

I'd shut up if I were you. I didn't want to think about what he had done to her the night he was talking about. I was already worried about what was happening to her in Hueco Mundo. Orihime had said little about her experiences there, but we all knew something bad had probably happened when she jumped away from human contact for a month. Damn that Aizen.

She'd fight them ya know.

Excuse me?

They aren't like me. i'm part of you and she knew that. She won't hold back from blastin a hole the size of Mars through them if they touch her.

I nodded. I guess that's true.

So could ya please ease up on the emo feelins King. I'm drownin in here.

I can't just turn my feelings off. I'm not a light switch! I don't work that way.

My hollow sighed. Well I tried.

I ignored him and just stared off into the distance. All I could think about was getting to her. I just wanted to get the hell out of here and rush headlong into a fight. I needed her beside me. I needed to know she was okay. I made her a promise that I wouldn't run away. As the anger rose I felt the pain start again in my chest. It was like a 2 ton Elephant was stepping on my ribcage. If I was going to get through this, I was going to have to keep a cool head.

Ahh man. If that's how ya gotta get through this then you're screwed.

I heard a growl in my throat. What did you say!

There's nothin cool about ya. You're a hothead.

You better shut the hell up! Before I come in there and make you!

I heard a laugh. My point exactly.

You little bastar-

"Ichigo. You okay?" It was Rukia.

I snapped out of my inner war and turned to look at her. I tried to put on my best Im-okay-face. "Yeah. I'm fine."

E.J. looked over at me. "You don't look fine."

"Did I ask you?" I snapped and stormed off.

I could hear their footsteps behind me. "Ichigo. Wait! Come on. I know this is hard but we're your friends! You can talk to us." Rukia called after me.

"Well I don't want to talk about it! So butt out Rukia!" So much for me keepin a cool head.

E.J. Grabbed my shoulder and turned me around to face him. "Hey don't get all pissed at Rukia. she's just tryin to help. You're not the only one hurting here you know!" His grip tightened and the look in his eyes brought me back to reality. I was so wrapped up in my own pain that I had forgotten that E.J. was feeling it just as much as me. He had just lost two sisters to Aizen's world.

"I'm...I'm sorry." I stammered and hung my head. "I just can't handle it right now. I want to go after her."

"I know it's hard to just sit here while you know what kind of danger they are in." He said, sadness seeping with every word. "But we have to do it. If we really love them we have to wait and make a good plan. We have to go in this with a damn good Offense." His eyes pleaded with me. "Please Ichigo. If you really love my sister...then please don't do anything stupid."

I slumped forward onto E.J.'s shoulder. "I do love her. That's why I can't sit still. Everything inside of me is propelling me forward. My heart feels like it could shatter at any moment."

I felt his arms move as he embraced me in a hug. Normally I would have freaked out and punched a guy for hugging me. But right now. I needed his comfort. "I know no matter what anyone says it won't take away the pain. I am struggling with my own feelings so I know what is going on inside of you. But if you can...try to take comfort in the fact that my sister does love you. Before she met you she was bitter and resented everything. I found her drunk and passed out in the living room most nights. She got into fights, lied, stole, refused to listen to teachers and she even killed the thugs that attacked her and Iz. She has had a hard life. We all have. But she took it the worst. Before you she was empty. Every day since she met you and your friends I've seen her filling up little by little. She stopped drinking. She actually started laughing again. Her eyes filled up with happiness. You did that Kurosaki. You did what I couldn't do." I felt hot tears on my shoulder. Was E.J. crying? Then I noticed my vision was blurred. Was I crying?

My hollow groaned. Quit the water works! I'm already Drenched damn it!

I didn't pay attention to him. E.J. wasn't done talking. THis was the most he had said to me ever. And right now. I needed to listen. He broke away from me and wiped the tears from his face. I could tell he was slightly embarressed that he had just cried on his sister's boyfriend but it didn't really matter. After all, there were tears on my face too.

"The only reason why she went with that bastard was becuase he said Iz was there. That was Jonathan and knowing him he does have Iz. That fuckin prick. IF there was one thing in my life that I could take back, it would be going to that movie that night. I wish I had been there. I wish I was the one that killed him for what he did to my sisters. But I wasn't there until it was too late. Kari was the one that had to protect Iz. She's been trying to protect her all her life. I tried to share that burdon with her but she just pushed me away. The one I kept trying to protect was Kari. I was trying to protect her from herself. But she's just so stubborn." He said looking up at the sky. "She doesn't want help from anyone."

"I know." I muttered.

"And she just willingly up and went with that prick. I don't know much about any of this. This soul reaper and espada shit but I do know that they played her for a fool. She should have stayed and we could have thought up a plan. But noooooo. She had to do things her way. And now both of my little sisters are in some hell world and I'm exactly where I was four years ago! I'm fuckin useless!"

Rukia placed a hand on his arm. "No you're not."

His eyes moistened again. "Yes I am. I sent Izuma to live with Kito-san becuase Kari thought it was better that way. I should have put my foot down. I was the adult. I should have done that. But in my mind I thought it was the right thing to do too. Giving her a chance to forget. But look were it got me! It's my fault all this shit happened! Jonathan came back from the dead, found my Iz, tricked Kari into going with him, and now he has them. He's right where he left off. And every moment i'm here It makes me sick. I'm so sick of how pathetic I am!"

The ground began to tremble. "What the hell?"

E.J. didn't seem to notice the earthquake beneath his feet. "It's all my god damn fault! My parents wanted me to watch over my sisters. They trusted me! They would be so dissapointed in how I turned out. I let both of my sisters fall victim to abuse. And here I was trying to help you but I just ended up falling into a pit of my own pain. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

As the words left his mouth the ground cracked in a circle around him and surged up in a massive tidalwave of dirt and rock. I had to jump quickly to dodge the onslaught of debris. "Shit!"

"E.J?" Rukia's eyes were wide with wonder.

He just stared down at his feet. "What the hell just happened?"

We heard a laugh and turned to see Urahara leaning on a tree. "What just happened was an element power based on emotions coming out. You just found your powers E.J. Guess you won't be useless after all."

Izuma

I watched Grimmjow leave, dragging the new arrival behind him. I had seen what power she possessed. I would have been shocked and amazed if not for the hatred stirring in my heart. I really was alone now. Aizen must have known that Grimmjow had tried to help me escape…that's why he was reliveing him of his baby sitting duties…at least for me. Now he had to watch that Hikari girl. Hikari…..Kari….why was she so familiar? Where had I seen her before?

"Get up." A strong hand lifted me off the seat. I stumbled to gain my balance as Curtis held on to my wrist. All the memories of his past offeences to my body came rushing back to me in .2 seconds. My heart ached and my mind felt like it was going to explode.

I was completely terrified. "Where are we going?"

"I'm taking you back to your room…Izuma-chan."

I shuddered. Then what? I didn't want a repeat of earlier. I think I already started blocking that memory out. Honestly I was glad I had done what I did with Grimmjow. Although….it made Curtis just that much angrier. But I wouldn't take it back. I'd do it again. In any case I wanted to do it again. If only to get the feeling of Curtis's clammy skin off my own. He had his fun making me shiver in fear. He wanted to see my fear, my terror. I shook my head with the thought. "Never again." I whispered. I will not show my feelings until I'm alone. I will not let him have that satisfaction.

"What did you say?"

I looked up at the blonde haired man. "I…I didn't say anything."

He grunted and continued walking. When we got closer to my room I could hear shouting. I knew that voice. The man beside me yawned. "Poor Grimmjow. He's going to have his hands full with that one. I should know. She gave me so much trouble. I wonder if he'll teach her how to behave the same way he taught you…"

I glared at the floor. He was making a mockery out of me. All his snide comments were pissing me off. But every time I looked at him my soul froze and I could do nothing but stand there. I could barely speak, let alone yell at the disgusting creature. I strained my ears to see if I could make out what they were yelling about. The only thing I could hear was the girl scream, "Why the hell do you care whether or not I left her!" Who was she taking about? I couldn't pick up on his response but I could tell from his presence that he was pissed. I could only imagine why.

"I'll be back in the morning. We got a lot of catching up to do. Petto." He jeered before shoving me into my dark, gloomy prison. Petto…that's exactly what I was. A pet, a slave. They had no interest in my powers anymore. I was here for pure entertainment now. Something to keep the unruly Espada occupied while waiting for whatever plans Aizen-sama had. I listened to the door click shut before I let myself feel the real impact of that reality.

I looked down at my battered up uniform, no doubt my face looked just as bad. And the sick feeling of disgust swelled up in my stomach when I thought about what had taken place just an hour ago. I could still him, hear him, taste him. I could still smell him on my skin. I couldn't run fast enough to the bathroom. I tore off my clothes and threw them in a heap outside the door. I reached into the shower and turned the knob on to full blast. The walls of the shower were a white, murky color. You could see through it but it was blurred. The shower itself had no door but a small opening to climb into it. The clouded glass covered the rest of it allowing a little bit of comfort and privacy. If there was such a thing in this hideous place.

I found myself stepping into the steaming shower. The scorching heat was welcoming on my tired skin. I wanted the feeling gone. Everywhere hurt and reminded me of where his hands had been. I grabbed a cloth and began scrubbing myself self so hard that the once cream colored skin glowed an angry red. I didn't care. I kept scrubbing. I wouldn't stop until I was completely satisfied that there was no trace of him left on my body. I took some comfort in knowing he hadn't been my first…but that didn't stop the tears from falling. It was bad enough that I had the creep Kuutso to worry about.. but now I had the monster from my nightmares…alive and in the flesh to torment my waking hours as well as my sleeping ones. I was going to live in this limbo until I died. And the only person capable of bringing me out of my misery for at least a few moments was no longer my guardian. He probably couldn't even come near me anymore. With that thought the tears came harder. No he'd find a way….wouldn't he?

I sat down next to the opening, leaning my back against the glass and bringing my knees to my chest. The water cascaded around me. I looked down to see small lines of red trailing down and mixing with the clear water. Blood. My blood. The sad thing was no matter how much blood I drew or how many times I brought the hard cloth to my protesting skin, the feeling remained. I still felt dirty. I clung to my knees as my tears mixed with the red water flowing down the drain. Nothing could make this feeling go away.

I wanted to die. I wanted so badly to just lay here in this shower in a pool of my own blood and let the world slip away. Iz you sound Emo. I thought to myself. How sad. At a time like this I was making jokes just to stop thinking about the pain. That's when I suddenly felt it. A strong presence coming closer. I listened to the door in the other room swing open and close a second later. I didn't move, or even breathe. I didn't need to. I knew he would come.

I heard his footsteps echo on the cold tile floor. I remained in my position. I couldn't move. I was to tired. I listened as he sat on the floor and leaned against the shower. The only thing separating our bodies was the clouded glass. I shivered despite the hot water raining down on me. How could I face him now? I closed my eyes as he spoke. "You alright kid?"

Grimmjow

I had left the woman to her pitiful crying. If I stayed any longer I'd really want to kill her. It was her fuckin fault that Iz was in this position in the first place. I knew now that the kid was just a pawn. She was bait to lure her sister here. So now what was she good for? Nothing. And that left nothing but trouble for me.

I waited until I felt Curtis's spiritual pressure disappear completely before I ventured down the hall to her room. I found no one around so I didn't hesitate to open the door and shut it quickly behind me. I could hear the shower running. I stepped over her wadded up uniform and peered into the now foggy bathroom. I could see her scrunched up silhouette leaning against the glass. Instead of reaching into the opening for her I settled on the floor, leaning my back against her blurry figure. Something was wrong. Very wrong. I could feel it. "You alright kid?"

I could hear her inhale. "Grimmjow….should you be here?"

"Don't worry about it. He said I wasn't your guardian anymore. He didn't say I couldn't see ya." I replied. "Come on kid…tell me what's wrong?"

She took another breath and I could hear the hint of tears in her voice. "No matter what I do…I can't seem to get it off."

The hell? "Get what off."

"His presence on me." She said before breaking down in a fit of tears.

It took everything in me to stop myself from jumping up and hunting that fucker down. Damn these human emotions! I didn't ask for them! I cursed myself for having no control over my inner dealings. I was ready to damn them all to hell until I heard the water stop and felt her hand on my wrist. I looked over and saw her climbing out of the shower. Before I knew what I was doing I had scooped her small form into my arms and held her to my chest. "You can let it out. Ya can even scream if ya want." I said. The familiar words seemed to bring her out of her restraints as she gripped my jacket with her hands. Her soaking wet body was already drenching my clothes but I didn't care. All I cared about was her. Ah damn! I fuckin cared! What the fuck! I had no business caring about anything other than killing but here I was sitting on the floor holding a shaking, crying, naked girl and for once it wasn't because I was about to fuck them. I was comforting her. Which was also something I wasn't familiar with. I just held her, stroking her damp hair with my hand.

She buried her face in my neck, sobs racking her body. After what seemed liked hours she stopped shaking and her sobs calmed down to soft drones. "I don't think I can live like this. I don't think I'm gonna make it." she said as hot tears slid down her face and trailed down onto my chest, joining the ones that had already fallen.

I held her tighter. "Don't say shit like that."

"Why not?"

"Cuz…it's depressin as fuck."

A small chuckle escaped her lips. "I didn't think espada got depressed."

"Well this one does….. But only when he see's his girl hurtin and he can't do a fuckin thing to stop it." Again my mouth spoke before my mind could shut it up.

She pushed herself up to look at me. "What?"

I rubbed the back of my neck. "Well….I…It just pisses me off."

She shifted in my lap and rested her head on my shoulder. "What does?"

"What he's done."

Her face lifted and she looked into my eyes. Those dark blue orbs had me in a trance. Damn her. "Thank you."

"What for?"

"For this. For protecting me. For ….letting me know something other than his touch." She couldn't mask the pain in her voice or the look in her eyes.

I leaned down and kissed her forehead. Yet another thing I wouldn't in a million fuckin years think I would do three weeks ago. "Tch don't thank me for that. It was my job."

She sighed. "This isn't your job." She said motioning to her in my arms. "I'm not your job anymore. Yet….here you are."

"Yeah. It's freakin me out too." I cracked a small smile.

A tiny smirk formed on the corner of her mouth and she snuggled closer. "Hey Grimmjow?"

"Yeah?"

Her voice was weak but I didn't miss her question. "Do I still smell like him?"

Does she have to keep breaking my non-existent heart every five seconds? Damn give a guy a fucking break! I made a point by taking a deep breath and smelling her hair. "Nope. You smell like that nasty ass lavender soap."

"Are you sure?" She must be really torn up about this. Just another reason I was going to kill that bastard!

"Yeah." I replied. "But if ya stay in my arms like this you'll end up smellin like me."

She looked up at me. "That's exactly what I want." she said planting a kiss on my neck.

My eyebrow raised. "Is it now?"

"Yeah. I just want to forget." she answered, her eyes closing and her body slumping slightly.

"You're to tired and beaten up for that right now kid."

"No I'm not." she said slowly. "Besides…if I fall asleep he'll be there in my dreams anyways…..I'd rather stay up…and…..be with….you…he'll just haunt me…in my nightmare…."

"Well if that happens you'll wake up and I'll be there to hold ya."

"But I don't…..want…that….to..." Her eyes fluttered and her head finally managed to rest all the way on my shoulder.

"It's ok Iz. I've got ya. You can sleep." I said, lifting her up In my arms. I carried her into her room and laid her gently down on her bed. I thought about finding her pajama's but then shook it off. She said she thought she smelled like him. Well when she woke up she'd smell like me and wouldn't have to worry about it. I climbed into her bed on the other side and pulled her up to me, resting her head on my chest. She stirred and wrapped her leg around mine and threw her arm over my stomach. I trailed my hands up and down her back and arms. I laid awake all night like that. Holding her, touching her, making sure I was there if she needed me. But not once did she wake up. She didn't even talk in her sleep like she normally did. The only thing that happened as I laid there with her was her soft, sleep tranced whisper just before morning broke. "I think….I love him.."

Fuck.

Next Day

Kari

I awoke to the pissed of face of my guardian.

"Time to wake up Light-chan." He sang mockingly as he yanked the covers from my body.

Well that was a new nickname. "Why should I?"

"Cuz Kuutso wants ya today."

"That freak with the fangs?" I grumbled.

He nodded and tossed me a fresh uniform. He didn't look as pissed off as I first thought. "Yeah just put this on already so we can go."

"What's your damn hurry?"

"I got shit to do."

I raised an eyebrow. "Thought watchin me was your job."

I didn't miss the glare he shot at me. "It is. But I got other jobs too. So the sooner you get your ass together the soon I can get out of here."

I yawned and started pulling off my nightclothes. I didn't even care that the espada was still standing at the foot of my bed. Times like this did not call for modesty and I already had little to begin with. He just stood there with an impatient look on his face. Normally I would have seen at least some look of desire in mens eyes but his were blank. It was he was looking at a wall and not a half naked girl sitting in a bed. But then I remembered something. He had something going on with my sister. "You're going to try to see her aren't you?" I asked zipping my uniform up.

"What's it to you?"

"She's my sister." I replied, getting up and brushing out my hair.

He came and stood behind me. "She doesn't even know ya."

"What the hell does it matter?"

"It matters."

"Whatever. It's not like you'd understand our bond. She's my blood. I'll always be here for her."

He jerked me around to face him. "Maybe it's you that don't understand. You're not the only one that has a bond with her."

I narrowed my eyes. "You better rephrase that."

"Or what?" He challenged. "You'll fry me? I'm not scared of you. You are nothing. So you can go take that sob story to someone that cares."

"And you can go to hell!" I spat.

He just began laughing like a crazed lunatic. "Look around bitch. We're already there."

I sighed and followed him to the door. I was never going to understand this crazy bastard. And I was never going to like him.

The fanged espada smiled sinisterly at me. I knew this was bad. Really bad. He strapped my arms and legs to the chair and began rolling up my sleeve.

"What the hell are you doing?" I barked angrily at him.

He just continued to smile and brought a small vile filled with a black liquid out of his pocket. He then proceeded to get a syringe out of a drawer. No this was not good at all. "What is that?"

"Well…it's just a little toxin that I have created just for you and your….sister."

"What? Are You are seriously going to inject me with that shit?"

He nodded and filled the syringe with the substance. "But no need to worry. I have already tested it out on Izuma-chan. It worked quite well but I needed to improve it for you."

"What did it do to her?" I yelled, angered by the fact that they had been running experiments on my little sister.

"This little serum brings out the instincts inside of the test subjects, also the power hidden within themselves. I made it purely for you my dear to bring out the instinct in you."

"That didn't answer my question asshole."

"Mmmmm Feisty….I see where she gets it." he chuckled. "It worked fine with you sister, bringing out her instinct to fight. But that wasn't good enough for us…No…you see unlike you your sisters hands are clean. So this will work much better on you."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"We want to bring out your true instincts." He leaned in and whispered in my ear. "Your instincts to Kill."

My eyes widened. What the hell was going on? My instincts weren't to kill...were they? "You want me to kill people?"

He smiled and jabbed the needle in my arm. I could feel the hot liquid immediately rush through my veins. "Yes…much more than that actually...but you see we knew you wouldn't be as controllable as your sister. She is hard to break it's true, but she isn't that powerful. She is easy to keep in check. But you aren't Hikari-chan…so for you I added a little something extra to the mixture."

"What….what did you add?" I asked as the room began to swirl. A dull pain began creeping up my legs and all through my body. When it reached my head it became a roar. I cried out. It felt like a thousand needles were being shoved into my brain at the same time. My eyes were on fire and my vision blurred. I couldn't do anything because of my restraints. All I could do was scream as the pain escalated.

"It looks like you were the best test subject after all." He laughed. "Sweet dreams Hikari-chan."

The last thing I saw before I lost consciousness was his fangs baring in a hideous smile.

Alot to take in I know. First E.J. gets powers, then Iz has an emotional breakdown, Grimmjow is all OOC and freaking out about Iz's breakdown, and finally we have Kari. She's in some deep shit now huh? Tell me what you think in a review or PM. Feel free to give me critisism or advice...or even to yell at me for being mean to Kari. Whatever it is let me know. :D