Pure Insanity plus Star Wars!
Now my workload has increased significantly! But instead of doing my homework, I am typing up this next chapter! Why, you may ask? Because doing my homework first would be too logical!
Jill: How's the fan girl war been going?
Sonic: Well, they've been under a trench warfare stalemate for a long time now…
Jack: (looks out at area between trenches, a.k.a. land of no return) Whoa…I've never seen so many plushie bombs in one field!
Knuckles: Fan girls are a brutal species…(shudders)
Jack: But this review may change the outcome of things….
hi!now i will make people happy and make them suffer
sonic:i heard somewhere that you are easily distracted by anything ...(shows sonic a shiny new nickle)
shadow:go into the closet with a fangirl.
silver and blaze:switch bodies.
gamma:kill amy as many times as you like.
metal sonic:i don like into an incinerator
tails:kill cosmo with fire
knuckles:go into the closet with jill
cosmo and cream:make peace,then go into the closet and have sex
until next time.
and i am on.
JASL;FDGHVMJGCMUIYKJX,MCNNMHCUYTC JIMANY FLIM FLAM BRU HA HA!
OK,i am done.
-Gunslinger 117
Sonic: (looks at nickel) Oooooooo...shiiiiiiny…
Shadow fan girls: (cheer loudly, wanting to do their favorite bishie)
Shadow: (sighs) Who do I choose…
Random fan girl: (jumps onto stage screaming while covered in red and black paint)
Jack: Perfect! That girl looks crazy enough for you! (shoves her and Shadow into closet)
Shadow: (in closet) Get off of me! AGH!
Jack: Back to body switching already? AUTHOR POWERS! (switches Silver and Blaze)
Blaze: (looks down shirt grinning) Thanks…
Silver: (slaps Blaze) You don't have to be so pervy about this!
Jill: Ha! Now Silver literally slaps like a girl!
Blaze: (glares)
Gamma: Attacking fan girl now. (starts up another Amy killing spree)
Amy: (runs off stage) YAH!
Metal Sonic: Preparing for end. (jumps into nearby incinerator)
Jill: Didn't he kill himself by burning to death in the movie as well?
Jack: Oh yeah…you mean with the Terminator rip-off ending!
Tails: (bleep)! Well, I have to do this…(throws Cosmo also into incinerator)
Cosmo: AAAAHHHHH! (roasts to death)
Shadow: (runs out of closet, throws random fan girl into crowd before heading off to sulk) Stupid (bleep)ing crazy fan girls…
Knuckles: And now I have to deal with one…(heads into closet with Jill)
Jack: (revives Cosmo, switches back Blaze and Silver) Now it's time for peace!
Fan girls: NOOOOOOOO!
Jack: Too bad! This war's been going on for too long, and needs to be resolved!
Cosmo: I'm not giving Tails to you!
Cream: And I'm not giving him to you!
Jack: Then neither of you get him! You need to do the next dare instead!
Cosmo: (sighs) Well, I guess that brings a temporary peace…(gets dragged by yuri fan boys into closet with Cream after kicking out Knuckles and Jill)
Fan girls: (stop warring, are utterly confused)
Jill: I understand your confusion! You've been fighting for your favorite fluffy's heart, and now he suddenly has no love interest, being rejected by both!
Tails: (sobbing)
Random Tails fan girl: Wait! With Cream and Cosmo gone…WE can be his love interest!
Tails fan girls: (scream) FLUFFY! (grab Tails, take him into crowd)
Tails: NOOOOOOO!
Jill: Wow…that relationship is kind of one-sided…
I dare you to give Cosmo and Cream Jedi powers and have them battle to the death with lightsabers (make Cream's green and Cosmo's red). And to set the mood while they're fighting, play the Imperial March. You know, dun-dun-dun-dun-da-dun-dun-da-dun! Dun-dun-dun-DUN-da-dun-dun-da-dun!
-Bad-to-the-Bone457
Jack: (sends away yuri fan boys) No more sex! The war is on again!
Cosmo and Cream: (grab lightsabers)
Janitor: (plays Imperial March on loudspeakers)
Jill: Wait…isn't red supposed to be the evil side's lightsabers?
Jack: So this reviewer is also TailsCream! Interesting…
Cosmo: Hehehe…with our cookies, the Dark Side will now always win!
Cream: Not so…for we have candy!
Cosmo: COOKIES!
Cream: CANDY! (starts up an epic lightsaber duel)
Fan girls: (start warring again, only this time also arguing about cookies or candy alongside Cream or Cosmo)
Tails: (climbs back on stage, watches duel) Wow…they both still like me!
Jill: While there's debate over which is better between cookies and candy, I think we can all agree that…POCKY WILL RULE THE WORLD! AHAHAHAHA! (Google Pocky if you don't know what it is!)
Jack: And now…for something completely different! (Monty Python, of course!)
Jill: Let's get to some anonymous reviews…
I am only going to cause suffering.(for most characters)
Blaze:do shadow in the closet and like it
Shadow:get tied up and used as a target for charmy's archery
Silver:throw him to the fangirls,get him out have shadow kick his butt,then throw him back in and,jack, you have the choice to help him out afterwards OR you could knock him back in for more torture *evil laughter*
Knuckles:makeout with jill
Rouge:throw her to the fanboys
Sonic:lets see if you can out run amy WITHOUT your super speed!
Amy:get killed by everyone once
Tails:choose your girlfriend until your head explodes like blaze's did!
Happy torturing! MUA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
-Safarithecat
Blaze: MORE Shadaze? Everyone loves having me sleep with hedgehogs…(heads into closet with Shadow) OH! Nice…
Silver: (cries) This must be karma for looking down her shirt earlier…
Jill: And to worsen your luck…(throws Silver into fan girl crowd)
Blaze: (drags a tied-up Shadow out of closet)
Shadow: You bitch! You sleep with me, and now you're subjecting me to torture from that insect?
Charmy: Hey! (pulls out bow) Now you've made me really angry! (starts shooting at Shadow)
Shadow: OW! You got me in the EYE! Ugh…
Jill: And now I have my own business to take care of…(grabs Rouge by her ears)
Rouge: Yowch! Ears are really sensitive, you know-AAAHHH! (is thrown to fan boys)
Jill: (wipes hands together) With that out of the way…(pounces on Knuckles, glomps him, and gives him a very one-sided makeout session)
Jack: (injects Sonic with X-Lax) Now the fun begins!
Sonic: That…(pants) makes me feel so exhausted…
Jack: (releases Amy out of a nearby cage) There's your bishie!
Amy: OMG! Come here, Sonic!
Sonic: (attempts to run, but collapses)
Amy: (grabs Sonic) FINALLY! And now I know how I can have you forever…(drags him to Death Star)
Sonic: (weakly) No…
Silver: (climbs back onto stage) Is it over?
Shadow: (tackles Silver) I'm afraid not. (punches him a couple of times, then throws him to fan girls)
Jack: I'll keep Silver in there for now…
Amy: (comes back carrying Sonic, who is now frozen in carbonite) YAY! I can't wait to put him in my shrine!
Jack: But first…(sharpens kitana) We have to kill you. A : But-but I…(starts mumbling) All of you are just keeping me from my bishie…
Jack: (stabs Amy with kitana) HA!
-One million "demonstrations" of how to kill a fan girl later-
Tails: But…they're still dueling! So I can't know but…AH! Can't…choose…(head explodes)
Cosmo: (stops fighting) NOOOOOOO!
Cream: This is your fault! (chops off Cosmo's head)
Fan girls: (continue fighting unabated)
Jack: Now we get to another complex review…
I dare shadow and maria to sing waka laka. Give Jill a Sniper Rifle and let have a go at all the other Knuckle fangirls. Have Knux get Jill pregnant. Have Shadow have a threesome with Maria and my fan character Nara, the purple dragon in the crowd, and get them pregnant. Let Nara keep her baby, but Maria has to let hers be adopted by a shadow/maria fangirl. Make Rouge and Amy switch bodies. No Juno for this chapter and the 4 chapters.
-Empress Ryu
Jack: (listens to song) Most. Random. Song. Ever!
Jill: We found a new source of insanity in this fic!
Shadow: (listens to song)…I'm not singing that.
Jack: (pulls out shotgun) Well, you have no choice! This chapter has already been extremely crazy, and this would be a peak of insanity! Now SING, damn it!
Shadow and Maria: (singing) Waka Laka's a thing to play forever, Just to be together…
-After the fast-paced song-
Jill: (laughing her ass off) But the fun's just started for me! (grabs Sniper Rifle, jumps into fan girl crowd) YAAAHHHH! (goes into crazed mode, starts shooting anything that shows any love to her bishie)
Knuckles fan girls: (start fighting amongst each other)
Jill: (climbs back on stage) Ha! And I've done something none of you fan girls have done…I have the bishie's baby!
Everyone: (gasps)
Knuckles: (slaps forehead) I knew I was forgetting something when I went in the closet with you earlier…
Jack: (rolls eyes) You forgetting something? Imagine that…(reads next part) NO OCs! AUGH!
Shadow: (backs away slowly from Jack) Okay, okay! I won't have sex with the OC!
Jack: Just get in the closet with Maria already! (shoves them both in) And to speed things up…AUTHOR POWERS! (switches Rouge and Amy just as Rouge climbs back on stage)
Rouge: (hugs frozen Sonic) I wuv you soooo much!
Amy: (sighs) Now I'm flatter than before…and my legs aren't that great either…
Rouge: (bleep) YOU, WHORE! (tackles Amy, scars her horribly with punches and kicks)
Amy: (spits out blood) You do realize that you just beat up yourself, right?
Rouge: (slaps forehead) Damn!
Shadow: (heads out of closet with Maria) Alright, she's knocked up! Now can we get the Double Juno with the crazy fan girl and idiot underway? (receives glares from Jill and Knuckles)
Jack: (switches back Rouge and Amy) Sorry! No Juno for 4 chapters! You have to give it to a crazed fan girl!
Shadow/Maria fan girls: (start slowly assassinating one another one-by-one)
Jack: Let's just get to the hospital so we can cause some fan girl riots outside of the building!
-At the hospital-
Fan girls; (protesting outside0 WE WANT OUR BISHIES! WE WANT OUR BISHIES!
Shadow: (shudders) I'm scared to head outside…
Maria and Jill: (have babies)
Shadow: Which fan girl do we give this to…(puts baby outside of hospital doors, then runs for his life)
Shadow/Maria fan girls: (start up gang wars over who keeps the baby)
Knuckles fan girls: (charge into hospital, take away Knuckles' baby)
Jill: Damn it! I was soooo close to getting Knuckles this time!
-Back on stage-
Jack: Let's add a final touch of crazy to this chapter…
I dare Shaodw to have to make out with Sonic's Sister SOnia from Sonic underground. (and like it!)Sonic must be in the room. And mabye tie him up so that he and Shadow don't kill each other!
-sugirl
Shadow: Today, I have been getting lots of ladies! (starts making out with Sonia in front of Sonic "statue")
Sonia: Mmm…damn, you emos taste good!
Sonic: (would go on a killing spree if he wasn't frozen at the moment)
Jill: Well this was quite a chapter! And remember…POCKY RULES! (throws some pocky at everyone, then runs off laughing maniacally)
Everyone: (Awkward silence)
-Later-
Amy: (drags Sonic into shrine) Hooray! Now Sonic will never run away again! (glomps him)(spends the next few weeks just constantly glomping on to him)
Now Sonic is the one who suffers a terrible fate at the end of a chapter! I hope you enjoyed our craziest chapter yet!