AN- This chapter was extremely hard to write. I feel as conflicted as Robin does in this story. I know not everyone can be happy with the way the scenes depicted here play out but...it is what it is.

Robin

Spring 2007

The sun had fallen hours before. Robin had been sitting in her favorite spot on the docks when it slid from the sky in a burst of colors.

At that moment, she had been leaning toward choosing Cruz over Patrick, and then later, when the moon was high above her, she was sure she would choose Patrick over Cruz. Now she was back to only being sure that she was confused.

Whatever she did it would have to be tonight because Patrick had just come home from the hospital and was waiting for her. If she went there without a clear decision then he might kiss her and she would surely not be able to keep a straight head after that.

Her heart was on the line. So much of it used to be invested in Patrick, and some of it was now, undeniably, taken by Cruz. So what was she to do?

She heard the footsteps a second before the man was there. He grabbed her arm and with a yank pulled her to her feet.

"What the hell?" she cried

"Give me your wallet now. Cash and credit cards. And jewelry too."

She froze, his breath was right on her face. This man was huge, over six foot tall and, at least, 250 pounds. He reached for her purse and, on instinct, she jerked away from him.

"Don't make me hurt you." His hand closed over hers and he yanked off her rings.

With all her might, she struggled to get away from him."Back off."

He shoved her to the ground, drug the bag from her shoulder, and stripped it of the items he wanted. He tossed it at her again and took off running.

For a second, she couldn't move. Did that just happen? she asked herself

Then she pulled out her cell phone and dialed. "Can you come down to the docks... where I always sit...yeah, now...please.." she knew her voice was getting hysterical but she couldn't help it.

"What happened?" he asked, in a rush of words. It was the first time she really heard true fear in his voice.

"I was mugged."

XXXXXXXXX

10 minutes later- he must have ran every red light in his race across town- Robin saw him jogging down the stairs of the docks.

When she spotted him she knew she was safe.

That set off an anger that had been pinned beneath her fear and she started ranting, "This town is unbelievable! Truly! You can't go five feet without tripping over a thug or gangster or ..." she saw the concerned look her was giving her and dissolved into tears "oh... I just hate this place sometimes."

He took her into his arms and murmured soothing words against her hair.

Words about how precious she was to him and how the man who threatened her was going to learn a lesson- one he would never forget.

After a few moments he asked, "Did he hurt you?"

She pulled back slightly and gave him a weak smile. "No, but I should have hurt him. My mom taught me a thousand different ways to bring a man to his knees but I went blank and didn't use any of them. There is one I can think of now that would have made that guy cry and talk funny for days."

He smiled. "You'll need to come down to the station and make a report."

"Tomorrow, okay?"

"Sure," Cruz said "Can you do me a favor and do your contemplating in your Thinking Spot in the daylight hours from now on? I would hate to lose you, Robin."

Her features stilled and he saw the look that came into her eyes.

His voice dropped to only a whisper, low and throaty and intense enough to make her feel it throughout her whole body, "Or is it too late for that?"

She bit the inside of her bottom lip, as if doing that would hold back the words.

Cruz started to move away from her. His feet seemed to be acting on their own accord. He stumbled back a few feet, needing distance to hear this, needing to not be so close and crave her so bad- not if it was already over.

"You can't lose me," Robin said.

But the tears were back. They weren't for her or her fear, they were all for him now.

She went on, "And I can't lose you. I just can't. Every second since the Charity Ball you have been there for me. Even if I didn't see you for a day, I knew I could call and you would come to me. You would be by my side."

The words sounded sweet but the desperation behind them was splitting his soul in two.

He simply stared at her, doing his best to disengage, but it wasn't working. He could feel all her emotions as his own: the confusion, the need to be connected to someone forever, to not let go, and to not hold on too tight, the ache for love.

"Cruz..." the way she said his name was a plea.

And he could not let her down. "It's okay, Robin. I understand. You're going back to Patrick, aren't you?"

He should have known this was coming. She hadn't even kissed him since her ex was in the car accident. But she spent time with him every day, as if she needed to see him in order to feel better, to laugh, to smile, maybe even to forget. And he needed her.

God, I need you so, he thought silently. Don't do this...to me...to us...stay...stay...I'm in love with you.

(And suddenly I become a part of your past
I'm becoming the part that don't last
I'm losing you and its effortless


Without a sound, we lose sight of the ground
in the throw around


Never thought that you wanted to bring it downI won't let it go down till we

torch it ourselves

And everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head


With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind) ( The Fray)

XXXXXXXXX

Patrick watched the clock tick away on the wall. He was still weak, bruised more on the inside than out, and getting up off his couch would take an effort he just didn't have.

He had survived.

Everything that happened since he came to Port Charles flashed in his mind. What he saw wasn't surgeries where he was the star of the operating room, or women whose names he couldn't recall now- whose bodies he had rested in for a moment in time- no, he did not see any of that. That was a blur.

He saw- dancing through his subconscious- her. Robin. His lucky break, though the day he realized just how lucky was the same one that she had broken up with him on. Or did he break up with her?

In the twisting conversation they had, the misunderstanding that never made any sense to him, he couldn't remember who finally said the words first. But when she had walked off that day, it was clear, they were done.

Never before had he tried to hold on to a woman who wanted to leave him behind. But this time he had, in his own way.

He had asked her to not give up. But...Patrick was afraid to admit it, afraid what it might mean...she had given up. She dated Cruz and tried to move on. Did it work? he asked himself now.

The clock ticked, another minute gone by. And Robin was still not here.

(Everyone knows
She's on your mind


Everyone knows I'm in over my head
I'm in over my head
I'm in over...

Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head


With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind) (The Fray)

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Cruz had asked, "You're going back to Patrick, aren't you?"

"Patrick is waiting for me," she admitted "at his place...I should be there now."

Cruz nodded.

Robin hated needing people. Ever since Jason let her walk off that bridge and leave town then never- not even once- called to check on her, she had vowed to not be in this place again.

It had happened too many damn times. This needing someone to be around in order for her to be okay in life- her mom, her dad, Stone...and then they were just gone. To die was one thing, but what Jason had done...to just turn away and behave as if they meant nothing...it was something entirely different than death.

And if she didn't need anyone- only herself- she didn't risk the chance of going through that again.

But then Robin met Patrick. She hadn't wanted to love him, to dream of a future with him, to ever have him mean so much. But it happened anyway.

Her heart went and fell in love. And now it led her here, to this totally surprising and terrifying place, where she had to walk away from a man who had been nothing but good to her in order to go back to the man who still was swimming around in her heart and veins.

Yet...if she was honest...Cruz was in her too. They had been partners for months now, even though they weren't making love at night, or stealing away to share kisses during the day. He was her rock. She needed him. He loved her.

Robin's mouth opened slightly when the realization hit her. Cruz and her weren't working toward, maybe, one day, falling in love.

Cruz loves me... now... today...right this second...she thought.

A wild breeze whipped through the air and over them.

"Don't let me keep you," Cruz said in response to her words about Patrick waiting for her. "If you need to go..."

He would do whatever he could for me, Robin thought, even make this easy on me...But it shouldn't be easy...

She ran across the docks and into his arms. His whole body was shaking. He started to stroke her hair, and then her cheeks, as she stared at him with wide eyes full of heartbreaking pain.

Her mouth found his and their kiss was achingly desperate. Her fingers clutched his shirt, hanging on for all she was worth.

Cruz leaned his head against hers and said, "I will miss you like crazy, Robin."

"No, no, no..." she said softly, though her eyes said something entirely different.

He wished he couldn't read her. That he could let her lie to him and herself and stay here with him, where she felt safe. Cruz realized that Robin was on to him- she knew he would rather die than hurt her. And she craved that kind of security, that guarantee. It was so much easier than risking it all on Patrick and what might be...but if she didn't...she would one day hate Cruz, for being the thing that kept her from finding out.

And Cruz loved her too damn much to let that happen.

With Robin still pressed close to his body, Cruz whispered "You know you're going back to him."

"Listen to me," she said in a quick rush of words "please try and get how I am feeling...even if I don't get it...I don't know when it happened...it could have been that first day at the police station...when you bumped into me..."

His mind flashed back to the first time they ever touched. It was an accident. They ran into each other, his papers went flying towards the floor and so did she, he grabbed her instead of the paperwork. Their eyes met and there was a moment of shock. It hit them both, and then they were moving away from each other and murmuring apologies.

Sorry...

Sorry...

It was my fault...

No, it was all mine...

Robin went on, her words teary, and spoken right into his ear "Or maybe it was when you agreed to be my date for the Ball or later when you stuck by me, even though I was acting like a crazy woman. I knew that you were someone I could turn to...you would let me lean on you...and that means more to me than you can know, Cruz. There are so few people in my life that I ever open up to. Even my roommates don't know all of me...I don't want them to. But I want you to. I want you to know me and for me to know you..."

Cruz blinked back tears. For all she was saying, he could hear the truth. Like a piece of rope fraying, she was breaking away from him.

Robin cried in frustration. "This is not fair! I should never have done this to you...let you get in the middle of this...because now I have to do something worse...I have to ask you to not hate me...to be my friend anyway... and don't leave my life..."

She knew it was asking too much. Cruz let go of her, and moved an inch back.

Robin shivered. "I understand. You can't do it. I understand...it's okay, Cruz."

Their eyes locked.

"I can do it," he said in a voice that promised her forever but also sounded an awful lot like a curse.

Robin launched herself at him and gave him a hug, holding on for a long minute, and then she scurried from his arms and ran from the docks.

Cruz knew she would be in his life till the day he died, and she would stay in his heart just as long.

XXXXXXXXXX

Patrick was hobbling through the lobby of the Metro Court, where he moved after subletting his apartment to Emily.

He had to find Robin. She must be somewhere in this God forsaken city with Cruz Rodriguez, giving her heart away to him, giving her love away, giving their future away...

Patrick knew he wasn't supposed to be on his feet yet but he couldn't just sit in his hotel room and let her stop loving him...if she hadn't already.

Robin came flying in the door. She stopped dead in her tracks when she spotted him. He stared at her, letting out a long breath, and in his eyes she saw all he felt.

Her eyes drifted closed and her choice suddenly stopped feeling shaky. In that moment, she realized what future she wanted.

Love was something she would never understand. It was misery and bliss, heaven and hell, it was all she hated and all she needed to get through life.

Her heart hammered in her chest as she opened her mouth to say his name and tell him what she now knew.

AN- That's the end of Robin's chapter. It stops there and you can imagine what she said to him and who she really does love most.

Coming up- Melana and then an Epilogue.