Disclaimer: I do not own anything that doesn't have my name written next to it in pretty pink pen. I don't even own my horse Tig…that's how broke I am. I only claim ownership on Asher Hayden, Sarah Stevenson and anyone else that you do not recognise.

Summary: She went to the shut the door but paused, smiling slightly to herself despite the glare from the girl on her knees in front of the biker. "You do realise this is a twelve year olds birthday party?" It started at a twelve year olds birthday party in a Tacoma backyard ten years ago. Happy/OC

Thank you all for your reviews! Sorry I didn't reply to them - but as usual I'm sure a update is better =D. This chapter goes back to how I originally started writing this story so I hope you enjoy it! x

Stylized Violence – choreographed violence used in film and television to portray the illusion of real violence.

Chapter Thirty-Six - Freshmen

For the life of me
I cannot remember
What made us think
That we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me
I cannot believe
We'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen
-The Verve Pipe

Tacoma WA

15th December 2005

Sarah Stevenson was fifteen. Blonde, blue eyed and innocent. At least that's what people thought and Sarah wasn't going to correct them.

Sitting outside the Sons of Anarchy Clubhouse, behind the Tacoma Auto, Sarah blew smoke out from between her lips and watched people walk past with disinterest. Some were customers, others were club members, and then there were the sweetbutts. The whores that hung around the clubhouse. She didn't like them at all and she didn't have to. She was SAMTAC and they were just hang arounds.

Without moving her head she felt a cold shiver go up her spine and didn't even have to turn around to know who it was.

"You want somethin' kid?" The gravelly voice asked and Sarah shook her head slowly.

"No, just waitin' for Koz." She said quietly and watched out of the corner of her eye as the huge tattooed biker walked past and headed into the clubhouse. There were days when she wanted to spend every minute in Happys presence, the constant reminder of safety and strength that radiated off him made life easier, sometimes. Days like today, it just reminded her of what had happened seven years ago, not so far from there.

After the attack, she'd been hurt and scared, but she hadn't understood the severity of what had happened. It wasn't until she was thirteen that she started getting the nightmares. Vivid colours and flashing lights and Ashers screams and the popping of a gun that had her gasping for air when she woke. But sometimes it was easier to be asleep then awake. The hushed tones of her parents talking and the looks from the other club members were getting tired and old. The only person that didn't treat her any different was Kozik. He was always willing to teach her things and when she asked, and really was her only true friend. People always assumed the worst, no one ever thought that maybe Koz needed a friend as badly as she did.

Except Happy. He never made any comments about their friendship and Sarah wondered if maybe it was something to do with him and Asher. Not that Asher had a great reputation in the clubhouse anyway. The only person people spoke worse about than the sweetbutts, was Asher Hayden. Some called her a slut, others called her a traitor and Sarah always wondered why everyone hated Asher so much. From what she knew, Asher had helped Happy out a lot more than the club had. And maybe that was it- maybe the club didn't like the hold Asher had over Happy, or the fact that she was often more reliable than themselves.

"You're going to die young kid."

"Better than dying old and ragged like you." Sarah replied, smiling at the blonde who had just appeared.

"Come on, driving ain't gunna learn itself."

Tacoma WA

15th December 2005

"Come on, Sarah. We've been going out for like three months now. I love you." Sarah stared off into space as she sat on the parkbench in front of the skatepark, watching the kids play in the playground.

I love you

"You mean it?" Sarah asked, looking up at Cade, the brunette quarterback she'd been dating for three months now. He was hot, sweet, popular. He was perfect.

"Course I mean it baby. You're the hottest girl at school."

Hot

"I love you too, Cade." She said quietly, wondering if this the time she should tell him, tell him the truth about her.

"Well then show me." He pleaded and she looked into his perfect brown eyes and nodded slowly.

"Okay, but there's something I need to tell you first."

Tacoma WA

16th December 2005

People were naïve. Sarah had learnt that a long time ago. People lived their sheltered lives and if anything bad penetrated that protected shell then they fought back…or ran. She'd never considered herself as naïve. But she'd been sheltered beyond belief. Only recently her parents had started letting her go out without someone always lurking in the shadows to protect her. It seemed that they were more scared of her getting hurt then she was of being hurt. And as much as she had hated them for it then, now she understood. Because when people were confronted with the truth, they got scared and they reacted.

And if a reactions what she wanted, that's what she got.

Monday at school was hell and all because one boy that she had trusted enough with her secret had gotten scared…and run to the entire school.

Tacoma WA

16th December 2005

Every club had their veteran members. Redwood had Piney, and Tacoma had Blue. Blue was nowhere near Pineys age, but he still had an outlook on the club that most members didn't. Not the younger ones anyway.

Sometimes, especially now with the pressure from the Irish mounting, Happy found himself seeking Blue out for advice or just to hear an old timers story. It wasn't something he would admit. Most of the time, he'd just ignore his advice anyway, preferring Lorcas approach, but that was a bond between a sponsor and his Prospect. But Lorca was getting pressure from Redwood, which meant Happy was getting pressure from Lorca, because it was his damn fault Clay Morrow suddenly had it in the for Tacoma. Because he'd been stupid enough to fuck MC royalty. And Lorca had warned him to stay away.

Fucking Asher Hayden. One day he was going to forget about her, but until then, her memory just drove him to prove himself even more. He'd worked his ass off doing runs and special 'jobs' for clubs all over the country. Clay would have no worries about his loyalty to the club as long as he proved himself.

But in the meantime, he needed the veteran to look him in the eye and remind him why it was worth it. Blue was the only one of the entire club that he had seen choose family over the club. And days like this when he wanted nothing more than to see that little blonde bitch and have her give her one of her smiles that he knew she fought so hard to hide. It was Christmas that always did that to him. Reminded him of that first Christmas out of jail when she'd come home and he'd spent the night wrapped up in her.

He kicked the stand down on the Harley and pulled the helmet off before looking around the deserted street. It was a street filled with memories for him. All those years and all those memories that he didn't like admitting he had. What kind of killer would he be if they knew that just this street had a crippling effect on him. From that birthday party where he'd seen her smoking out her bathroom window from this exact spot to the time he'd found her passed out with exhaustion on her kitchen floor.

Tacoma memories were the worst, Sacramento ones were a little better. Spending three days with her the year before and buying her that dog that she'd been a smart ass about and named Grumpy. The last year, the anger had slowly dissipated to nothing more than an ache in his heart wondering whether he'd made the right decision in walking away and leaving her for the club. The club was his life, but she'd saved it countless times and days like this, he was reminded of that.

Walking up to the front door he saw Blues big truck parked in the drive and continued his journey up to the front door. Politeness had him knocking but the door swung open and knowing Blue he'd be in the study, pouring over old Harley Manuals or something boring as shit like that he walked in, the loud music blasting through the house an indication that one of Blues kids were home. Walking through the halls that in the last few years had become a lot more familiar, he reached the study and looked in to see the room completely empty.

"Blue!" he called out, looking down to the kitchen but couldn't see anything so he kept walking. Hunter instinct had him moving slowly and quietly. But he came to a dead stop when he heard the splash of water and looked down to see the carpet beneath his boots stained with moisture.

Turning to his right he saw the bathroom door, the door that Asher Hayden had once opened to find him getting blown by some sweetbutt. He didn't miss the rhythm of his heart pick up or the pang in the base of his throat that signalled panic. He didn't know why it happened, but he was opening the door in seconds only to stop dead on the water soaked tiles.

"Quit stallin' brother and get the fuckin' thing out." Koz growled as he glared up at the younger man who had that familiar shit eating grin on his face as he inspected the nail protruding out of his brothers hand.

"Dude you look like the Biker Jesus Christ." Spanner chuckled as he shook his head and Kozik envisioned sticking that same nail in the younger mans pretty green eye.

"Get it out." He bit out instead, momentarily forgetting the amount of pain he was in.

"You were the stupid fuck that slapped your hand down on the table."

"You're the stupid fuck that left nails lying around."

"I'm building a fuckin' table Herman." Spanner teased back and Kozik took a swipe at the huge smartass but stopped, realising his good hand currently had a three inch nail sticking out of it. "Here hold still." Koziks eyes widened as Spanner produced a pair of pointy nosed pliers and brought them up to his hand. "Still." Spanner said again, but it was him that jumped when the door behind him slammed and he whirled around to look at Donut standing behind them.

Kozik didn't miss the horrified look on his brothers face as he looked at the scene in front of him.

"Don't worry brother, I'm the anti-christ." He joked but swore he saw Donuts face pale even more.

"It's Sarah." He choked and all rational thought left Koziks mind as he stood up. He'd fucking seen this coming a mile away. He'd been waiting for this day for nearly seven years. "She's in the hospital. They say…" Kozik didn't need to hear the details. He knew her, she was like his own kid. He probably knew her better than her parents, that's why he had seen this coming. Why he had warned them so many times. Why three months ago he'd called Asher Hayden and told her she needed to come back.

But she hadn't.

And now this had happened.

"They say she tried to kill herself, man."

A/N: Well?