Cherished Moments.
M rating for this chapter. You have been warned.
He awoke slowly, drifting in and out of a light sleep as he slowly came around to the sunlight creeping its way into his room. Casting a warm light through the gaps in the curtains.
He blinked as his eyes slowly adjusted to the light. He remained still, feeling a warmth beneath the covers. But, as he became more awake he felt the presence of somebody else. Turning his head he saw her, laying there, facing him, her eyes still closed and her hair laying loose behind her. She was breathing deeply as she remained asleep.
He frowned, trying to think back to what happened last night, almost as though there had to be a reason. She still did not trust him, and he knew that forgiveness was not on the cards either. So, why was she in here.
He was overthinking it. He told himself quickly as though shutting down his mind for a moment. He remembered trying to persuade her to trust him, she had always trusted him implicitly, so much so that if he asked or advised her to do anything it was an immediate yes, or ok. So to see her so hesitant now hurt him. It was his own stupid fault, he should have told her from the beginning. Although certain aspects of the plans and attacks worked better with her lack of knowledge on such situations. It had given him the upper hand.
His mind was his own worst enemy, he had forgotten when he last awoke to her beside him. How good it felt to share such intimacy with somebody. Those few moments in the morning when nothing else should matter. Where your company with each other should be enough.
He had gotten used to that over the years and taken advantage of it. But knowing what it felt like to wake up alone meant he would never do such a thing again.
She stirred for a moment, not waking up, but rolling further into his side, laying her body against his as she laid a hand across his bare chest before falling still once more.
Such tranquillity should never be missed or ignored. He thought to himself as he felt her breathing against his side, closing his eyes he cherished the moment. Because he was unsure if he would ever get it again.
V&M
''The Queen is not in her room'' Mrs Skerrett said quietly in Emma's ear. The lady in waiting had sent the dresser after Victoria as had yet to emerge from her room.
The statement didn't shock Emma, perhaps it surprised her a little. But she was used to that now. Nodding to the dresser Emma continued in the conversation that surrounded her.
Mrs Skerrett walked out of the room, smiling to herself as she headed back towards the staff quarters.
V&M
Victoria opened her eyes slowly, blinking to the bright light within the room. Her arm resting over his body as she moved to sit up, realising where she was.
She rolled over onto her back once more, rubbing her eyes with her hand as she looked up at the ceiling, taking in the fine detail engraved across it. The flowers looked similar to the ones engraved on the walls of the palace, with small birds dotted around the vines for added detail.
''Beautiful, isn't it'' His voice caused her to look at him. Truthfully it was all she wanted to do since she woke up, but something stopped her. She did not regret sleeping with him, it had been the best nights sleep she had had in weeks, however the mood still remained awkward, almost as though the topic was entirely avoided.
She looked at him. God he was handsome, his features never changed, even when he was in a state of undress, when his hair was messy from sleep, or when his voice was husky as he spoke for the first time in the morning.
She couldn't tear her eyes away from his, seeing something within them that made her want to know more.
''You're not even looking at it'' She smiled as she turned to look back up, her head laying flat on the soft pillow.
''I have found that cherishing certain moments, as simple as they may be, is something not to be overlooked''
Victoria turned to see his smile, small, and almost in significant. But it was there. ''And what are you cherishing?'' She had to ask.
''You'' He replied plainly
She couldn't help but smile. He spoke with such dignity and honesty when they where alone, sharing every thought with no hesitation. She looked back up at the engraved ceiling. ''I couldn't sleep last night, and somehow ended up in here, I didn't want to disturb you. So by waiting for you to wake I suppose I fell asleep''
''I am not complaining ma'am'' He replied quietly.
Victoria released a little laugh, still trying to understand why she came here last night, she was still living in the past a little, going over what was said and done. But found the longer it went on, the harder it was to keep up with everyday life. ''I needed the company'' She admitted ''I have been terribly lonely of late, surrounded by people who are paid to be beside me rather than someone who cares for me'' She turned to look at him again, moving her entire body to face his. His smile had gone as she searched her face, seeing the sadness she held there.
''Your people are there because they care for you ma'am, their wages make no difference'' He said quietly, trying to reassure her.
''They do not have a choice'' Victoria argued ''It would be an insult to walk away from The Queen''
''But they are people ma'am, with their own minds and emotions, if they did not want to be here they would not''
Victoria hummed, still looking into his eyes. ''You seem sad'' She replied.
He sighed ''Regretfully so''
''Why?''
''Because, I have lost you. It was hard before, loosing a loved one consumes your life into a darkness unknown to others. It deprives you of happiness and enjoyment and encourages you to do daily tasks in mourning ways. I did not think I would feel such happiness and belonging again. But I have, and now, like a flash of lightening, it has gone''
She really saw it then, perhaps it was because they where alone, that he didn't feel the reason to hide anything, or perhaps he tried to and no longer could. Either way she saw the genuine pain, hurt and guilt in his eyes, and she related to it. As she felt the same.
''You are not alone Lord M'' She placed her hand on his cheek, feeling the warm skin beneath it. ''And no matter how hard I try to, I cannot be angry at you for trying to protect me''
She watched him close his eyes, feeling into the touch she offered him ''Happiness is not fleeting, it does not disappear after some time, perhaps it is hidden from view in certain circumstances, but it is still there'' She whispered, watching his eyes open and lock onto hers once more. ''You have to create moments of happiness, not wait for them'' She smiled as her voice began to crack. Reliving words of advice she received over the years of her miserable life at Kensington. Words she listened to but did not understand until now.
They held such emotion and truth, so much knowledge in someone so young, she did not think herself smart, but certain things he still did not understand, and yet here they were, teaching each other, and growing as one.
He searched her eyes as she did his, something pulled him towards her, no matter what the circumstances he was looking for her, her company, support, help, guidance, love. Whatever he needed she seemed to have it. He could not recall feeling that way with Caro.
He didn't dwell on the thought to much, for if he did he wouldn't do it. He just hoped she took it the right way, the way he was silently begging her to.
He moved his head closer to hers, sharing the same air before kissing her chastely on the lips, it was a brief kiss, fleeting, yet seemed to last for ages as he slowly parted from her, looking up to see her eyes closed. They remained like that for a moment, inches from each other as Victoria found his eyes once more. Something changed for her then, she couldn't place what it was. But she no longer felt the hurt and anger that dwelled her brain constantly. She felt her sense of belonging, as a quiet, peaceful air covered her mind, dulling all the worrying thoughts she had going on.
She kissed him back, pulling her body flush against his as her hand found his face and chest. The contact was sudden and came as a surprise to him as his hands crept round her waist, holding her close as she deepened the kiss.
It was a slow sort of kiss but held so much feeling. Victoria began to feel the butterflies in her stomach as his hands travelled up and down her side, never straying any further, as though that line, despite their perfect circumstances, was not to be crossed. She found an unrequited love for him, and his gentlemanly manner then.
But she found she wanted more, it had been so long since she felt his touch, in ways that lead to those wonderful feelings he often made her feel, the moments where all she could do was beg and scream, where nothing else mattered in the world but the two of them. She wanted those feelings, and she was sure he did to.
She linked her arms around his neck, still kissing him, nipping at his bottom lip just as he did hers, offering herself to him as she quickened her actions slightly, trying to make her intentions clear.
Victoria pulled against him as she laid on her back, encouraging him to lay above her, He never parted from her, but he smiled against her lips as he climbed on top of her, hovering his top half above her as he continued to kiss her.
His hands began to travel more now, feeling across her chest and stomach, following the lines and curves of her body, gently pressing against certain areas before being featherlike in other places. Her skin began to tingle as that delicious feeling built between her legs.
He moved down to kiss her neck, nipping at the skin behind her ear just a little to harshly perhaps, she jumped pressing her body to his for a second before hitting the bed again. She sighed and moaned, one hand in his hair and the other exploring his back, feeling the contours of muscle there. How she had missed his body.
Then his hand found her breast, nipping at the erect nipple quickly, eliciting a gasp from her, she was still clothed, only just. One thin chemise covered her body from his. The duvet covering them both from the cooler air in the bedroom. She wanted it off, she wanted to feel his skin on hers.
''Take it off'' She said breathlessly, holding her arms up as he sat up slightly, lifting the chemise up her body, enabling Victoria to sit up and remove it completely.
He had to admire her body, how beautiful it was. Before leaning back down, pressing his groin into her side, eliciting a gasp from her as her wide eyes searched his briefly before closing.
He was wearing night clothes, only covering his bottom half as she ran her hands up his bare chest and across his abdomen, feeling the new scars he held there.
His kisses moved down to her breasts then, and as his mouth found her nipple she almost cried, the sensitive shock sent waves of pleasure right down to her core, lighting a fire of desire and want as she became more vocal, needier, the more he teased her.
She felt him smile against her skin, he lightened up on his actions for a while, calming that fire before moving onto the other breast.
She parted her legs, her bare body was able to guide him to sit between her legs, wrapping herself around him as he did so.
He pushed down, his erection pressing against her, just In the right place. The cotton trousers he wore where becoming a hinderance as Victoria pressed harder against him, trying to create the friction she wanted from him.
He was as impatient as her, but something willed him to drag it out, to make her beg and plead, perhaps to savour her body for longer than needed, he found he never tired of her touch, and had so many things to explore with her, certain things he wanted to save for after their marriage. There would always be lines even he would not cross.
His hand moved down between their two bodies, squeezing her thigh as he slowly moved towards her centre.
He vaguely heard the word please. Although he may have imagined it as he looked at Victoria, her head back, neck exposed, mouth open and eyes firmly shut as her body focused all its attention on his hand, one that was taking its sweet time in giving her what she wanted.
As he reached between her legs, dipping into her centre she moaned louder, he groaned as his desperation built, his own desire pushing him on, making him more and more uncomfortable.
It was probably the worst timed moment of all time, but the knock on the door caused both to jump out of their skin.
Victoria gasped and almost held her breath as they both stilled completely. The second knock was more severe, Melbourne knew he would have to answer it, his head falling against her chest as he sighed his fustration.
''You have to answer it'' Victoria whispered
''They will go away in a minute'' He replied in a hushed tone.
''If you don't answer it they will get worried and come looking again'' Victoria said firmly but exceedingly quietly as she pushed against him, encouraging him to sit up.
He looked down at the naked woman laying in his bed, breathing heavy and waiting, his own desire now extremely uncomfortable as he sighed in annoyance. ''By the time they come back we shall be ready to leave the room'' He pleaded
''William, answer the damned door'' Victoria said quickly, swatting his arm as his face etched with pain and desperation brought a playful air to the current mood.
''Whoever is behind that door had better have a bloody good reason'' He snapped in response
Victoria covered her mouth as she tried not to laugh, quickly pulling the covers over her body as he stood from the bed and grabbed his robe concealing his… situation from whoever was behind the door.
He turned to see Victoria slowly cover her head with the duvet, concealing herself from sight. He opened the door a little to harshly. ''What!'' He said firmly as he eyed Lord Alfred.
''I am terribly sorry sir, but your boxes are here, and I have a letter for you from the palace'' Lord Alfred replied awkwardly.
Lord Melbourne suddenly felt very sheepish for being so rude. ''I am terribly sorry Lord Alfred'' he said quietly ''I did not sleep well last night, could you leave the boxes in the room The King has arranged for myself and The Queen to do the boxes in, along with the letter. I shall be down shortly to meet Her Majesty'' He smiled.
Lord Alfred nodded and smiled in return turning to walk away. He shut the door. He knew he should have opened the letter, but the timing was not right, he wanted to cherish the moment he held right there, the moment he was sharing with his soon to be wife, sometimes the most important things are overruled by the simpler things.
Victoria pulled her head from beneath the covers, smiling as he walked over to her, sitting on the edge of the bed he pulled his trousers down and slipped off his robe. Revealing his naked body to her in the morning's light.
She wanted to say something witty or funny, but found her mouth to be completely dry and her throat free of words as she looked over his naked form.
Slipping beneath the covers he climbed on top of her once more, a smirk covering his face as he pressed his weight down into hers once more. ''Now, where were we'' Victoria smiled and giggled quietly in response.
He kissed her again, his hands began exploring her taught body once more, as hers slipped across his back, one moving down to his groin, grasping his hardness within her bare hand.
He groaned, a deep guttural type of groan, pushing himself into her hand further as he kissed her breasts, using his teeth against her nipples as his other hand slipped down between her legs.
He did not want to tease her, or make her beg now, he did not want to wait any longer.
He knew she was ready, but as his hand teased her sex he saw her begin to breathe heavier, her legs parted further as she willed him to do more. Her eyes snapped open as he stopped, lifting his body above her once more.
Their bodies met once more as he guided himself into her, he stilled for a moment, trying to control the flush of want and need, to stop himself from loosing control completely. He felt her accommodate him perfectly as she wrapped her legs around him, encouraging him to move.
She moaned louder this time as he began to move, his body flushed with pleasure as her sighs and moans got louder, driving him on as she met his thrusts with perfect accuracy, their bodies so in tune with each other that such an act was effortless.
He tried to control himself as his thrusts began to match hers at a quickened pace, she was willing him on, she wanted him to speed up. To lose control.
And he did, just as she asked him.
Her moans became very loud as she began to plead with him, singing sweet mercies into his ear as her cries got louder, he bent down as he felt his own climax reaching alongside hers. He felt her body begin to clench around him in that way he had never felt before, it was enough for him to slip over the edge, pushing himself into her harder as he reached his peak, kissing her firmly as she cried into his mouth reaching her own climax before they both slowed and stilled together.
They where both sweating slightly as their breathing slowed, he rested his head beside hers, their bodies still joined as the pleasure began to die. He loved that bit, the part where your mind was still, reeling from those delightful feelings.
He parted from her slowly and laid beside her, watching her breathing return to normal as she turned and smiled at him. Turning her body to face his.
He smiled at her, as she smiled in return. Her cheeks pink and flushed as he kissed her swollen lips softly before pulling her into his frame.
He nestled there for a moment. ''Lord Alfred could have seen me'' She said against his chest.
''I hope, that in due course it will not be a problem'' He replied tentatively.
She pulled away from him and looked confused. ''What do you mean, you hope?'' She asked.
He hesitated ''Marriage ma'am, perhaps I worded it incorrectly. I am unsure as to your wishes to continue with our marriage or not''
She placed a hand delicately on his cheek, a silent reassurance ''I want nothing more, than to do you the honour'' She smiled.
He breathed a sigh of relief, it was a concern he had suffered since confessing to her on the ship, her rejection would have been understood. But he was unsure how he would have coped with it.
''We should probably get up, it is late, your boxes are waiting'' He said with a smile, one of which subsequently reflected her annoyance to.
He sat up from his bed, Victoria remained under the covers as she watched his naked form stand and grab his robe, he was in no rush to put it on as he walked away from the bed, slowly pulling it across his back and slipping his arms into his sleeves. He walked over to the doorway, turning to make sure the naked woman in his room was covered from view, before slowly opening the door and stepping outside. A few seconds later the door opened again, and in came a tray with hot water with some tea and coffee beside it.
''Where did you get that?'' Victoria said quickly as she sat up in bed and watched him proceed to make the hot drinks.
''I asked last night for it to be left outside my bedroom door for this morning. You cannot function without such things in the morning''
Victoria laughed as she watched him move about the room, doing different things to get ready. It was not something she had witnessed before, usually they parted ways and met in a different place later. But, because of the situation, Victoria daren't leave the room. ''Do you have a robe I could wear?'' She asked from the bedside, as he brought over a cup of tea.
He smiled and nodded, walking off to find her a robe to wear.
V&M
Their conversation was replaying itself in her mind as she walked down to meet him in their boxes room. The palace was beautiful, and so finely detailed, from the floor to the walls to the ceiling, and all the bits imbetween. Everywhere she looked there was something to admire.
As she walked into the room provided she saw him, already working on the papers awaiting them. She had begged to stay in the room longer, to enjoy those moments of comfortable company, no duties, no visitors, just the two of them. But he had of course insisted on the right thing to do.
The dresser had by Lord Melbourne been instructed to dress Victoria in his room. The chances of being seen in this new palace by unknowing staff was to high. He did not want rumours to spread. The dresser already knew, and her discretion was obvious.
He looked over to her, her face was bright, her hair tidy and her dress simple yet elegant. Whatever she wore, in whatever style, she looked beautiful.
He stood from his seat, bending down and kissing her hand respectfully. Something about the action was intimate, especially considering what had occurred just an hour earlier.
''Good morning ma'am, I trust you slept well'' He stood and sat himself down once more.
''Very well, thank you'' Victoria said politely as she looked down at her overflowing boxes. Her eyes locking on to a letter which was addressed to Lord Melbourne.
''This is yours'' Victoria lifted the letter up, seeing his face changed as he remembered what Lord Alfred had said.
''Yes, I completely forgot. He did mention a letter'' Standing from his seat he walked around the large table and took the letter from her.
As he opened it he felt that heavy bearing of worry and stress fall onto his shoulders once more, his heart accelerated as the anxiety began to flood through him.
The read the letter carefully. Victoria studied his reactions as they gradually seemed to change.
''What does it say?'' She asked
He handed the letter over to her. Victoria read the single sentence.
Melbourne, I know. Yours,
''I don't know'' he replied honestly. ''It is not the man who is keep an eye on things, his writing is different to that''
''So somebody else knows?'' Victoria pressed.
''It would seem so ma'am'' He said gravely
''But what do they know?''
''I have absolutely no idea'' Lord Melbourne replied.
My smut seems to take up entire chapters! But it isn't a bad thing for anybody who prefers to skip things like this and stick with the plot! As always, thanks for reading, sorry for the slow updates. Leave a comment if you have time