37. RUSH
So it begins: a courtship across a lecture room—shy glances, half-smiles; looks that share a memory of passionate nights. He reads epic poetry aloud, stories of brave men and beautiful women meant only for her. Steals Homer's words, making them his own. She takes them in, sealing his words in her heart.
People talk about falling in love as if it's easy to do. But this feels more like a struggle than an effortless drop. A fight through a thick forest that scratches and cuts, leaving her wounded, bleeding. She's pushing against the darkness—both his and her own—but it pushes back, creeping around her, trying to swallow her up.
An hour after the lecture finishes, she gets his first text message. Of course, being Edward, he has to quote the Iliad.
"There is the heat of Love, the pulsing rush of Longing, the lover's whisper, irresistible—magic to make the sanest man go mad."
She googles feverishly for the right Homer quote to send back. Smiles when she finds the appropriate Iliad words.
"You will never be lovelier than you are now."
A moment later, a reply: Then come and see me. Now.
She practically runs to the faculty building. Cheeks rosy and pink, breath fast, loud. He opens the door to his office before she can even knock. Pulls her inside, slams it shut.
The danger of being caught adds an edge to, heightens even, their kisses. They're frantic, desperate. Lips crush, tongues battle. His fingers tangle in her hair, cradling her skull, angling her head to his. He grows hard against her stomach, she presses against him, grinding; tasting his groan as it escapes his lips.
When they pull apart, they're silent for a moment. Bella tries to chase her breath, chest heaving as she stares at him. His eyes are bright, hair mussed. The way he looks at her makes her skin heat up.
They've only managed to be apart for two hours. Avoided kissing each other for five. The physical need to be with him overrides anything else: propriety, appearance, college rules.
"Can you stay with me tonight?" He whispers into her hair. "I'll pick you up at six."
"Yes." An immediate reply. With the optimism of youth, she doesn't stop to consider the consequences.
Love makes her blind to everything but him.