36) The Miserable Have No Other Medicine, But Only Hope

CLAUDIO

The miserable have no other medicine
But only hope:
I've hope to live, and am prepared to die.

DUKE VINCENTIO

Be absolute for death; either death or life
Shall thereby be the sweeter.

-Measure For Measure, William Shakespeare

Riddick pushed into his suite and frowned, Kitten wasn't sitting in the lounge area. He would have thought she'd be back from the library by this time. They'd be bringing dinner by pretty soon. Dog made a disgusted noise in his throat and Riddick inhaled thoughtfully. "Yeah, weird scents. C'mon." He moved towards the bedroom to investigate and paused in the doorway.

Apparently, word had gotten out that the Lord Marshall was back. He was a little surprised that this hadn't happened the day after he'd arrived. The concubines, all four of them were in the bed, naked and writhing against each other. It was an all too familiar sight. With a sigh he moved forward and stood at the foot of the bed. They were gorgeous, varied in shape and type, pampered and plucked. With his color goggles he could see one redhead, one blonde, one with brown hair and one with black.

One of them smiled up at him and, obviously recalling his interests during his last stint as Lord Marshall, turned to another and began to kiss and suck on her breasts, making the other moan. He'd always enjoyed seeing them play with each other, getting each other ready to be fucked good and hard. It had never failed to get a deeply physical reaction from him. Guaranteed to get him rock hard and ready to fuck.

Until now.

Looking at them just left him cold. They were beautiful, objectively speaking, nude and polished, every bit of them made to please him, and he just wasn't interested. His spine prickled with unease as his body failed to react and he nearly cursed aloud.

What the fuck was wrong with him if he didn't want a willing woman, or women, in his bed? It was clear they were ready, practically begging for it. Even as he watched one slid her hand between the other's thighs, spreading her wide and showing off a shaved pussy, glistening and ready for him. And he less than zero interest in it, his cock wasn't even shifting. Hell his heartrate hadn't even gone up.

His first reaction had been to throw them out. Outraged that they'd dare enter his room without permission. Angry that they'd invaded the bed he shared with his woman, his Kitten. And bordering on rage that them being there might hurt her. He didn't want them. He only wanted her.

What the fuck was wrong with him?

The last time he'd seen them he'd been two deep in women and ready to go again and again. Nothing could satisfy his lusts for long. He'd proven to them over and over that he was an animal in more ways than one. He'd done things with them he'd never gotten the time to do on the run, made them perform acts on each other that half the 'Verse would consider depraved, and used them as if they were toys, made only to please him, satisfy him. And they'd taken everything with pleasure and begged for more.

He didn't have to take care with these women. Didn't need to concern himself with their fears or phobias. If he left bruises they were happy. If he fucked them raw they were thrilled. Dominating them in every way, ordering them around and commanding them to pleasure him with their mouths or cunts… He could do whatever he wanted with them and never have a half a moment's concern for how they felt.

So why wasn't he diving in? Why wasn't his dick even twitching slightly at the sight and smell of them? Was he so dependent, so attached to Kitten that other women were just annoyances? That warmth in his chest turned to ashes when he thought of how hurt she'd be if he fucked one of these sluts. The idea of hurting her was as hateful a thought as being compared unfavorably to a fucking Reaver.

He'd never been like this. Even as attached as he'd been to Kyra, that hadn't stopped him from whoring his way through the 'verse. He'd mourned Carolyn but he'd still fucked any female willing to have him. And Dahl… he'd been balls deep in her, filled her twice and two seconds later it was as if he hadn't had a woman in months when he thought of River Tam.

What in the sweet unholy fuck was wrong with him?

River frowned as she neared the suite. The activity in the halls had quickened as Commanders ordered troops to their stations. The fight with the Reavers was imminent. That would set the Necros on their heels. With barely any effort she reached out to find Riddick's mind, half expecting him to be in the Command center where he could see the entire fleet and their enemy on the screens.

But he was in their suite. Odd but not unheard of. He'd told the Commanders they had to prove themselves to him. In his mind that meant they had to do it on their own. No guidance from the Lord Marshall. Sink or swim. Without even his presence to reassure them.

She was through the door with a smile of greeting on her face when she heard his thoughts. Wondering what was wrong with him that he was so content with her. Why wasn't he interested in the sluts on the bed when he always had been before? Annoyed with himself that he was so attached, dependent, that he didn't even want another woman. They were only annoyances. His thoughts were tangled, angry and annoyed, with himself, with her, with the Necro concubines on the bed. "Riddick," She murmured his name quietly.

His gaze snapped up to her and she realized that for the first time she'd managed to sneak up on him. He'd been so engrossed in figuring out what was wrong with him that he hadn't even heard her come in the room. And that alarmed him even further. "Kitten," He spread his hands as if to show he was unarmed. "I haven't touched them, I swear."

She rolled her eyes, as if she wouldn't be able to tell. As if she didn't know each time he'd gone to another woman, attuned as she was to his moods and needs, in love with him as she was. "Out," She snapped the command at the concubines. "Get out now, before I start cutting off parts of you." She began to draw her blades and smirked at the shrieks of dismay as they grabbed their satiny robes and fled the suite.

Riddick was studying her in concern and she could have wept. His mind was full of memories, of those women, others, everything they'd done. How he'd enjoyed them, wanted them. He'd done things with them just to see if he could. Enjoyed them in every way possible. And he was irritated that he didn't have even the least little bit of desire for them now. Even the sight of them would have sparked his lusts before but now they left him cold.

He didn't know what was wrong with him. Why was he so attached to her that he didn't even want to look at another woman? Why was he so dependent on her? Why was the thought of hurting her anathema and ashes in his chest? She could feel tears in the back of her throat as she Saw the inevitable result of those questions.

Sooner or later he'd go from questioning to wanting to prove there was nothing wrong with him. That he could want someone else, fuck someone else. He was so stubborn. Refusing to even look at his feelings, refusing to even consider what she was to him beyond his.

"You said you were mine," She picked up a bag and began to put her things into it without paying attention to what she was packing. "I love you. I've told you I love you over and over. Proved it to you in every way I knew how. Even though you'd never said it back. I'm yours. And you said you were mine and that was enough. But now…"

"I didn't touch them," Riddick argued and River knew he still didn't understand.

"But you wanted to. Wanted to want them. Wanted to be able to do as you please without feeling like cold ashes were in your chest," She hurled the truth at him. "Wanted to know what was wrong with you. What's wrong with your jī ba that it didn't even twitch at the sight of the whores."

"So?" He shook his head.

She nearly sobbed as she pushed clothing into her bag, shirts, underthings, dresses, boots, stuffing it full of the wardrobe blindly. "He wants to prove he is free. Unchained. Independent. Uncivilized. Doesn't need the girl or anyone. Wants to prove he can do as he pleases."

"I never said that. I never even thought that," Riddick grabbed her arm as he saw what she was doing, his grasp gentle but a manacle around her bicep. "You aren't leaving until we hash this out." His entire being was suffused with panic at the sight of her walking away from him and he hated that too.

"Thinks she's stupid," River spat the words at him. "Heard his thoughts. Heard him wondering what the fuck was wrong with him. She knows him. Knows her Riddick inside and out. He will go from wondering to wanting to prove there is nothing wrong. He will seek out another woman just to show himself that there is nothing wrong with him, that he is the same. Not soft. Not weak. Not Civilized." Dog whined unhappily as she pulled her sword off her back. "If you try to make the girl stay you will be useless to every woman in the 'verse."

He let go of her arm and put his hands up again. "Kitten…"

"Won't. Won't stay and be made a fool. Thought he would return her feelings. Someday." She dashed tears away and forced her breathing to even. "Stupid miscalculation. Belief and love over Reason. Hope influencing her Read of the odds. He is too stubborn. Refuses to even think on it. Won't let himself be hurt again. Will never, ever, say it to her, or even consider that he could feel it. Never thought it of him. Would never have believed Richard B. Riddick could be ruled by fear. But he is. Bows to no man but fear bends his knee."

That stymied him to the point of speechlessness, and she left.

Riddick looked at Dog and shook his head, "Do you have any idea what just happened here?" Dog whined unhappily and Riddick sighed, "Yeah, me neither." He sat in the chair and rubbed Dog's back. "But damn…"

He could still smell it. The salt of her tears, bitter taste of her pain in the back of his throat, the scent of her hurt nearly overwhelming him. She'd never been so unhappy, so hurt, before. Not even when they'd run into her old crew on Persephone or when she'd been a slave to Santana's crew. She'd been afraid when they'd seen her old crew and while Santana had been alive she'd been filled with rage and hate, a creeping fear like mold in his nose. But this… this was pure agony. She wasn't afraid. She didn't hate him. Wasn't even truly angry. She just hurt.

He'd half welcome the scent of the damn incense if it would drown out the smell of her pain. And he was the one who'd hurt her. That just made it worse. It was the last thing he ever wanted to do and somehow, he'd managed to do it anyway.

She'd never pushed him before, never demanded a declaration or acknowledgement of what she was to him. Saying that she was his and he was hers was the closest he'd ever gotten. She'd seemed all right with it. There'd been odd little twists of sorrow to her scent now and then, but they always faded after a moment. He'd done everything he knew how to do to put joy in her scent.

Riddick stood and moved towards the wardrobes. She'd managed to clear everything out pretty damn good, there wasn't anything left of her personal things. A few necro style dresses were left but she'd managed to throw everything else into her bag. He knew she'd gone back onto the Sanguine once before because she'd disappeared with the spine knife and poll axe one day and come back without them. He guessed she'd grabbed a duffle then, in case she'd wanted to bring anything with her when they left. He knew she'd taken their bloodied clothing back onto their ship because they were both wearing nothing but the Necro stuff the last couple days.

"I ain't lettin' her just leave us," He told Dog. "Gotta find a way to fix this." Dog made a mournful noise and Riddick nodded, "Yeah. Let's check the ship first and then we'll start looking for her."

She'd learned a few short cuts, though not many, but the route to the Sanguine was the first she'd figured out. Five minutes after she'd left the suite she was dumping her bag in her old room and sealing the ship up behind her, the spine knife on her hip. She was going to find Furya and shut that jiàn huò Shirah up once and for all, even if it killed she and Vaako both. The Necros didn't notice when she Read them. Maybe because they'd been alive once, and so a living mind Reading theirs didn't hurt the way a half dead mind did when it invaded a living brain.

People weren't used to seeing her run, but they did know enough to get out of her way. Finding Vaako's mind in the sea of dead thoughts wasn't easy but it was made simpler by familiarity with his thoughts compared to others. He was in the Command center with the rest of the Commanders, doing their best to counter the Reavers. Not that they were really doing well.

She had to avoid Riddick and Dog, as they'd both be looking for her, and get to Vaako. A shudder went through the Basilica, deep enough that she had to brace herself against a wall. Now she didn't have the time to avoid Riddick. Now she had to get to the Command room. A ship as large as the Basilica shaking like that could only mean one thing.

The running she'd done before was nothing to what she did then. She slammed the door to the Command room open and hurried forward, "What did they hit? Seal it off. Right away." She told Vaako quickly.

"It's only one of the minor halls in the lower levels," He was condescendingly reassuring. "We aren't venting atmosphere, it's been sealed."

"Did you learn nothing from what Riddick showed you? Nothing from what I told you?" River shook her head and pushed forward, moving a Commander whose name she didn't care to recall at the moment out of the way. Hooking her cortex up to theirs took only a moment and she huffed in frustration as she got a look at the damage. "Bái mù bèn dàn bastards," She cursed them and began to seal the hall and the rooms around it off, pulling up the cortex feeds and showing them the view from within those rooms. "They've boarded. So station some of your men down there in case they manage to breach those seals and get through to the rest of the ship."

She pointed out the halls, "There and there. Those are the chokepoints. Go!" She snarled at the Commander she'd pushed aside and took his place. The Warrior ships and fighters were trying to fight in their usual manner and it wasn't working.

"Who's in charge of the little fighter ships?" She asked as she brought up more viewpoints on the screens, splitting the large viewscreen into several smaller images.

"I am," Commander Lodal admitted. He was one of the ones Riddick actually thought well of, for a Necromonger anyway.

"You need to tell them that forming a line isn't going to work. This isn't another army. They aren't a world. You need strafing runs. You need ships willing to fly right into the Reaver ships just as they will do yours." She explained rapidly, gratified that he seemed to understand. "They fly without containment mostly, so usually a hit to their engines or something that causes a fire will cripple the ship. Fire eats oxygen and even Reavers need to breathe. If they don't have the ability to fly we can pick them off one by one."

He nodded and turned to relay that information to the warriors in the field. River looked at Vaako, "The Warrior ships, they're large enough, hold enough people that the Reavers will be attracted to them. You can use them as bait. If they're agile enough for the maneuvers, several bombarding the larger ships could take them out."

She tilted her head, listening and sighed, "They have reinforcements coming though. Every Reaver ship in the 'Verse is heading straight for Miranda. So you people had better figure out a way to deal with this."

"And why are you helping?" Commander Kurd inquired from his station, directing support troops and funneling them to the ships that would fly around the Basilica and protect the holy Necropolis.

"Well Riddick did say that if the Commanders couldn't deal with this without him, he wasn't going to bother with your oath. He wants you to prove yourselves." She smirked, "And am I not a Commander?"

Vaako's rusty chuckle was appreciative, "Somehow I doubt that's what he had in mind."

"Honestly I might not have bothered but you idiots let a Reaver ship slam right into us and they were pouring into the Basilica." River rolled her eyes, "And while I have fought Reavers in the past, and probably will again in the future, fighting them on this ship? With all these people? It'd be a tiān shā de mess. Or, as Riddick would say, a clusterfuck."

"Nothing is more chaotic in battle than civilians getting in the way," Vaako conceded.

River worked a bit more on the cortex and disconnected hers from the Necro machines, "Your feeds have stabilized for the moment." She tucked the cortex back into her satchel. "I'd suggest you target that liner next," She pointed at the largest of the Reaver boats. "If you can destroy it you'll have a better chance when the reinforcements get here. They've got…" She shook her head, "Tā mā de niǎo, they have a Corvette… Must have gotten it when they fought the Alliance."

Vaako and Lodal simply looked confused and she pulled her datapad out to show them, "This is a liner, like that one there." She pointed at the Reaver ship under attack by five different Warrior shps. "What they have…" She pulled up the Special Operations Corvette image and put the liner in scale next to it. "That's what they have. And that ship is made to be fast, maneuverable and dangerous. The Alliance Operatives of Parliament are the ones who use them. They didn't have one when I fought them before. When it shows up, ignore the other smaller ships, most of them won't have ballistic weapons. It does. Missiles. You'll need to destroy it before it can fire upon the Basilica. Because this boat is too big to be anything besides a target."

Kurd looked over and cursed, "I'd better keep at least a battalion in reserve. When it shows up we'll need them to engage. The rest of the ships can take on the others."

River nodded her agreement, "Good thinking." She tilted her head, "We've got… maybe a half an hour before they get here. If we can take out the rest of these ships before then, that might buy us some time for your fighters and warrior ships to refuel."

Lodal began relaying orders to his ships, the other Commanders doing the same, two of them directing theirs to target the liner while the rest commanded their troops to pick a ship and fire until it was destroyed.

"How is it you know these things," Vaako asked.

She smirked and pulled him over to an unused and thus quiet corner of the Command room, "Because I'm what you might call a Seer. I can see things happening all over. The past…the present, and sometimes the future."

"A seer," Vaako regarded her thoughtfully and she shrugged.

"Not the first time you've dealt with prophecy is it? Elementals aren't like I am. They calculate and narrow possibilities, predict patterns with such accuracy that it could be prophecy. But I actually See and Hear." She said quietly, "For instance, you wonder now, if Riddick will stay even if the Reavers are defeated."

The Necro Commander looked shocked to be Read and she smiled, "Can't help what I Hear." She looked at him, "I helped you. Because of me, your people might survive this battle, might live to go onto your Underverse. Now you're going to help me."

"Am I?" Vaako raised an incredulous eyebrow.

"You are." She folded her arms, "You're going to think of Furya. Of where it is. Of why it was erased from all records. Why is it hidden?"

"Why would I do that?" The dark haired Commander was still skeptical.

"Because if you don't, this ship, and every other ship connected to your systems, is going to go dark and still. And the Reavers will fall on you like a starving man falls upon a feast." River smiled coldly.

"You don't have the power to do that," Vaako shook his head. "Seer you might be but you're no wizard."

"I don't need to be," She shrugged. "I've had my cortex hooked up to your systems since my first day here. I'm a genius. Literally; my intelligence can't be measured. And using a cortex is something I'm very good at. Good enough to plant a Trojan Horse virus in your systems. The only thing left will be life support. So you're all breathing when the Reavers find you."

He was stunned, "I had my doubts, that you were Furyan. You look nothing like the rest of your race. But this… this is what one of their women would have done."

"Then look at me, and think of Furya, everything you know about it," River commanded him quietly. "Look at me." She stared up into his eyes and murmured, "Look into my eyes and let me See into yours. I am one with the Storm and the Worlds and the Swirl of Stars in the Heavens and I shall See."

Riddick stalked through halls of the Basilica, growling as panicked people sought the dubious safety but at least comfort of their rooms while the battle was fought. Funny how their faith didn't allow for fear but everyone still managed to panic anyway. He'd felt the ship trembling and knew that the Reavers had done one of their ramming maneuvers to board the ship. Dog snarled beside him and he stood for a moment, his hand on the animal's neck for reassurance. "I know. We'll find her though."

He crouched next to the animal and looked at him, "You wanna find Kitten? Let's find Kitten."

Dog knew 'find'. 'Find' meant there was a game of hide and seek and if he found Kitten she'd laugh and rub his ears and give him a bone to chew on. His ears perked up and he looked around, sniffing the air.

Riddick considered, "Not enough? Too many people?"

Dog whined unhappily and Riddick nodded. Too many scents would confound Dog. They needed a trail to follow. Ship's air being recycled so much scents didn't hang in the hallways for long. So he'd start with someone who might know where Kitten was.

He grabbed one of the other Commander's wives as she hurried past him, "Where's Dame Vaako?"

Dame Kurd, a slight delicate looking woman with pale hair and eyes looked up at him, "When last I saw her she was in the Chamber of the Greater Quasi Dead my Lord."

"Right," Riddick frowned. "Go on, get to your rooms. Bar the door and don't let anyone in unless it's your husband. And when I say bar the door I mean it." He raised his voice, "That goes for all of you. Get to your homes, without tā mā de trampling each other. Bar your doors. Stay inside and let the troops move easy through the halls. I don't care if you're hungry or thirsty, you don't call for a servant. If these halls aren't empty in a quarter hour I swear I'll empty them myself. Now get out of the tiān shā de way!"

The last came out as a bellow and everyone scattered to obey. He watched as the word was passed among them and began the walk to the chamber of the Greater Quasi Dead. Sure enough, Dame Vaako was there, her eyes were wide and her skin was chalky, even for a Necromonger.

The strangest thing was the chamber was quiet. Every time he'd ever been in it before it was filled with whispers. The ghouls in their sarcophagi murmuring to each other, to themselves, to anyone who'd listen. But now the room was silent except for Dame Vaako's strained breathing. He'd never smelt fear on her before but he'd bet even money he was now.

"Wanna tell me what's been goin' on here?" His voice didn't come out particularly gently but then he'd never thought Dame Vaako one who'd react well to anything but command. Suggestions and questions gave her too much wiggle room. He'd learned that last time.

"I… She…" Dame Vaako looked at him blankly for a moment. "I thought…" She was going to lie, he could smell it, and waited patiently for her to tie her own noose. "I thought Lady Riddick would be interested in the Greater Quasi Dead. She would never have seen such greatness as they before."

"Uh huh," He looked over at the elaborate coffins the psychics rested in and inhaled, smelling blood. "And?"

"She expressed an interest in their abilities." Dame Vaako was staring at the Quasi Dead as if she couldn't believe what she was seeing.

"And then?" Riddick growled the question.

"They screamed 'Furyan'…and couldn't stop… until…" She looked at the Greater Quasi Dead. "She said 'I can kill you with my brain'. And in another moment the screaming stopped… She left."

"She told you that before, and you thought it was a joke," Riddick looked at the woman. "Guess you aren't as smart as you think you are." He snapped his fingers and Dog perked up curiously, "Find Kitten." Dog sniffed and moved towards the doors. Riddick followed him and looked back at Dame Vaako. "You stay here. Ship's been boarded by Reavers and you'll just get in the way. Vaako can come and get you after it's done. If he's still alive."

He stalked out of the chamber and slammed the doors behind him, "Stupid conniving woman."

It took time to hunt Kitten through the ship. He stopped at the Commander's center and glanced in when Dog went to the doors. Kitten's scent was there but she wasn't. Vaako looked worried upon seeing him, "Lord Marshall."

Kurd and Lodal gave him salutes of acknowledgement but continued to direct their troops, and the other Commanders followed their example. Vaako was keeping everyone on task and an eye on the overall picture. "Lady Riddick came and gave us some advice, the second wave is nearly over," Vaako informed him. "I am informed that the Reavers who boarded the Basilica have been contained and are being killed to a man."

"Make sure you get every single one of those fuckers," Riddick warned him. "You let one get away you'll have blood streaking the halls for weeks after until you catch and kill the prick. They're worse than cockroaches."

"The men have orders and a company behind them as insurance," Vaako explained. "Lady Riddick was…quite adamant about them. She is somewhat less patient than you are my Lord."

"Never thought you'd see the day, did you," Riddick looked at the screens. "When I was the more reasonable of two choices?"

"Truthfully my Lord, no, I did not." Vaako admitted.

"And where is my Lady now?" Riddick looked at him.

There was a muted shout behind him and he turned to see Lodal and Kurd making triumphant fists, "The Corvette has been destroyed, before it came within missile range," Kurd explained. "The fighters and Warrior ships are taking care of the smaller ships. The Reavers should be no more very soon."

Riddick nodded, "Good." He looked at Vaako. "Where. Is. My. Woman." He bit off the words.

"I believe she said something about going home," Vaako looked slightly unnerved. "That you would be taking a trip." He held out a data pad, "She said to give you this when I saw you."

"I see." Riddick took the pad and brought up the text. Kitten had learned from their histories that normally a successor was chosen. Only he and Zhylaw had become Lord Marshall through killing the Lord before them. Though with Zhylaw she had no proof of it, only suspicions. Still he'd trust her guesses over other people's facts. And according the information she'd given him, he could appoint a successor and leave. If he chose.

Vaako was watching him with one eye and keeping the other on the screens to be sure there were no surprises. Riddick looked at him, "You said every Lord Marshall Ascends. That it's destiny for the Lord Marshall to lead everyone to the Underverse. You ran this show, with Kitten's advice, which shows you know how to take advice when it's given. And you have faith, which is more than I have. I wanted revenge on Zhylaw, for killing everything I'd known, I wanted to live. I never wanted to be your Lord Marshall." He looked at the other Commanders, "You've proved yourselves to me, that you are good Commanders. And Vaako is the best among you. I choose him, to be Lord Marshall after me." He spoke loudly so the data pad would record it as an impartial witness. "Go to the Underverse. If that's where your people truly belong then go. Don't you all deserve to go home?"

He handed Vaako the data pad and turned, Dog pushing against his side. Kitten was back on the Sanguine, and she'd gotten Furya out of Vaako. He'd bet his life on it.

Author's Note: Soo… don't kill me. Or Riddick. He's…emotionally challenged. So this isn't going to be resolved quickly or easily. Relationships take work and compromise and at least a modicum of self-examination. Riddick's been avoiding some of that and River's been letting him. And Shirah is of no help whatsoever. Just FYI.

Chinese Translations:

jī ba (dick)

jiàn huò (bitch)

Bái mù (stupid / Lit. white-eyed, blind / not understanding the situation and reacting in a wrong way as a result)

bèn dàn (fool / idiot)

tiān shā de (Goddam! / goddamn)

Tā mā de niǎo (goddamn it /lit. 'His mother's dick')

tā mā de (fucking)