Hi so here is another chapter, this took the longest time to write and it's massively AU. While the following chapters will be still cannon ish to the episodes expect a lot of flashbacks.

I wont spoil the chapter too much but this is massively AU.

Disclaimer-Nothing is mine,

Please read and review.

This chapter is structured a little differently that the others.

Next Chapter-Tori and Jade's Playdate-As Tori and Jade are forced to work on a assignment together, flashbacks show what happened following the events of the previous chapter.

Ayden

Chapter 37-Car, Rain and Fire.

Disaster strikes as the girls go out driving late at night to pay their respects to Cat's favourite actress. Massively AU chapter.

Tori's Point of View

They say you don't know what you've got till it's gone. Truth; you knew exactly what you had. You just thought you'd never lose it.

Cat's favourite actress was dead, but not really.

Jade thought she was at fault, but not really.

I thought that nothing could break me further, but not really.

And the weather was supposed to be sunny, but not really.

But more on that later.

Cat's Actress

Cat's favourite actress was dead. She was a complete unknown that I had never head off and both me and Jade were only going along for the simple reason that Cat wanted us to.

"I hate this" Jade muttered as we leant against the car waiting for Cat to put the hamster we were working with for our science project. "I hate the fact that she's...so Cat, I mean I love her and all but I hate the fact that she's so cheerful and I hate the fact that I'm doing all the work because of some woman that I don't even know...I mean..."she gave a loose shrug and then muttered under her breath so I couldn't hear her all that way.

"I mean it's not like it's Julie Andrews"

I blinked. "You like Julie Andrews?"

Jade stared at me. "Who doesn't like Julie Andrews? Sound of Music is a classic. It should be compulsory. We should learn the wonders that is Julie Andrews...beats all that classical shit that Andre's into"

She trailed off as she realised what she had said. She turned a fetching shade of pink and then chewed her bottom lip as she climbed into the car the subject of Andre finally over at least for the time being.

Cat ended up conning all of us and managed to get us to take her to San Diego. Trina was with Ayden but a combination of the rain, the wind and the scary as fuck clown at the service station effectively made sure that we were irritable (and silent) for the remainder of the trip.

And then it turned out that Cat's actress wasn't even dead.

"All of that" Jade said finally still shaking with the aftereffects of being sprayed with a hose by a manic actress. "For a woman that was still alive" she shook her head leaning back against the seat unable to seemingly comprehend what had happened.

I smiled back as Cat still acting like being sprayed with a water pistol by an enraged Mona Patterson was the best thing that had ever happened to her in her short life.

Jade's 'Fault'

Jade and Beck had broken up. Despite the three years they had dated each other they had finally had enough. And despite the brave faces that each had displayed it was clear to...well...anyone with a working brain that the two of them both loved and deeply missed each other.

Jade leaned down in her seat and gave a long drawn out sigh. I realised that under her eyes there were dark shadows and she looked as exhausted as I always felt now even more so.

"You wanna talk?" I asked lightly. Jade opened one eye and raised the one eyebrow above with an expression of disbelief in the only way that she knew how.

"No" she said finally. "No I don't want to talk...and not about that" she shook her head and I knew the 'That' she was refusing to mention. It was a constant open and unopened topic between the two of us.

"If it broke you and Beck up..." I pressed but Jade was already shaking her head.

"Me and Beck..." she shook her head again.

"It's complicated. Month after month of complication. I'm me...i'm dark and scary and whatever...I wanted Beck when he was a freshmen and I was sure that he wanted me. God knows I knew that he wanted me" she shrugged. "I wanted it to last forever...I thought it would last forever"

She shook her head her wet hair flying and sprinkling both me and Cat with droplets of water. She looked back up at the sky and frowned. "Shit" she said as if the conversation about how she wanted Beck back and how she had thought that they would be together forever hadn't happened. "It's beginning to rain again"

And it was. Groaning I leaned my head against the seat as Cat curled up into a small ball on the back to try and avoid the raindrops that were falling with gusto. Jade caught my eye and I knew that we were both thinking about a hot shower, some hot chocolate and considering the fact that Jade had just shown a rather considerable amount of emotion for her I imagine a very strong glass of alcohol.

"Come on" I said stretching my head back and wincing as my back cracked in protest. "Let's get home before something else goes wrong"

Jade shot me a wry look under her dark lashes. "What" she said dryly "Could possibly go more wrong?" I grinned despite the thickening rain making it hard to see.

"You sure you're ok driving in this?" I asked gesturing to the rain that was steadily falling.

Jade looked up and frowned wincing and wiping her face as the rain increased. She chewed her lip for a second before nodding looking resolute.

"I want to go home and have a hot bath with lots of bubbles and the half bottle of the red wine my Dad left behind when he went to Japan on business last week.

I grinned leaning back against the seat.

The Weather was supposed to be Sunny.

The weather was supposed to be sunny. Instead it was dark, the freeway was empty and the rain was falling with a steady rage. I suppose that it was poetic justice that the rain and the night and the cold were seeping into all three of us.

Jade was steadily driving but the rain was getting heavier and heavier and I could tell that Jade was struggling to drive and looking tired and so I was just about to tell her to find a spot and pull over, off the road so we could find a hotel for the night if needs be when she suddenly straightened up.

Something...someone...God knows what had come around us and in a mad dash to overtake had forced Jade to do a hard left. The combination of the rain, the fact that the road was already wet and the tyres skidding forced the car over the edge of the road.

Cat was screaming, Jade's hand had found mine and all I could think about was Ayden the little boy I had left at home with my sister who had lost his father and now had his mother in a car being driven off the road and down into a ditch the car turning over and glass flying everywhere.

The car stopped still but there was blood dripping down my face and Jade was slumped over the steering wheel unconscious. I wanted to turn and look at Cat but there was a searing pain in my upper shoulder that I knew with the surge of adrenaline I couldn't look at unless I started panicking.

And then I blacked out.

And Nothing More Can Break Me. (Or so I thought)

When I woke up there was something dripping down my face.

It took me a few seconds to realise that the wet feeling was blood.

I blinked looking around. Jade was next to me still slumped over the wheel and her dark hair was spread across her face. I shifted wincing to move Jade's hair out of her face. I fumbled with my fingers and then waited agonizingly.

I swallowed down the bile in my throat and breathed out what I thought was a sob. Jade was alive, breathing at any rate.

I tried to turn around to see about Cat but my arm was in agony. I twisted again to face it and had to bite down the scream of shock and pain.

A huge piece of glass had lodged it's way into shoulder. It must have come from the now shattered windows. The glass was in thick and deep and it was with what one could almost describe as awe that I managed to force my hand up and touch the end of the glass.

"Shit" I breathed my voice sounding strange even to my own ears. It was like something had forced me to react numbly. I leaned back breathing out a long breath.

Then I turned without warning biting down the pain and only just managing to swallow down the scream as the glass shifted to see how bad Cat was. I could only managed a quick glance before I had to turn back pain making me grit my teeth.

Cat looked alive. She had been thrown forwards and then backwards and was sprawled on the back of the seat like a little rag doll. Her eyelids were fluttering back and forth even as her knee dangled at a horrific angle.

I turned around sirens were nearby I could hear them.

But I didn't think about that. An accident like the one we had had wouldn't have stayed quiet for long and I didn't think that it would take long for someone to come to our aid. But that right there and then wasn't what I was thinking about. Right there and then I was thinking about my baby boy. About Ayden who was right now at home in his bed sleeping soundly.

I wanted to call Ayden and let him know that his Momma loved him no matter what happened to me but I knew that I couldn't ring Trina in the middle of the night and then have her wake him up to listen to his mother without freaking Trina out and I didn't need her screaming down the phone at me. Not when there was so much to say and not enough time (or at least I thought at the time) to say it.

I fumbled around the seat and inwardly cheered when my fingers found my phone. The screen was cracked and the light was slightly dimmed but there was signal. With trembling, blood stained fingers I managed to drag my screen to my call logs and then found the one number I wanted to call.

It rang once.

"Hey" came Andre's voice over the phone. He sounded confused but pleased and I realised with a heavy heart that this was the first conversation that me and him had had since we had broken off...whatever...we'd had.

I had to turn my head then to spit out a mouthful of blood. At least I think it was blood. To be honest the pain was much more important.

"Hey" I said biting back the pain. "You with anyone?"

"Just the guys and Trina...were at your house but don't worry Ayden's fast asleep...you wanna go on speaker?"

"No" I coughed "Just calling to check" Andre didn't comment on the fact that I hadn't known he was coming over.

"Oh" Andre said "Hey do you know anything about this accident on the news? It might delay you coming home though I have to admit I'd stop of on the way home and spend the night in a hotel. Jade must be spitting feathers right now" he laughed at the end of that and I had to squeeze my eyes shut against both the pain and the tears that were forming. The sirens were getting louder and I could hear voices. Jade's fingers twitched on the steering wheel.

Well...I didn't know what made me say it, maybe the accident, maybe the fact that help was coming but not coming fast enough, probably because it was true. But I said it. For the second time I said it.

"I love you"

There was a second of pause then a sound as if Andre was moving. When he spoke again his voice was lower and this time there was a clear note of confusion that seemed to hide something else in his voice.

"Tor..."

"No" I coughed again as light from what must have been a flashlight was shone over the car. "I needed to say that...cause...that accident...that's us Andre"

There was a long pause then there was a shout so loud that I had to put the phone away from my ear. It slipped and I had to scramble to pick it up before the pain from moving my shoulder got too bad.

Someone was defiantly coming I just hoped that they would be here in time.

I managed to grab the phone and bring it back to my ear wincing at both the pain and the loud voices down the other end of the phone. Someone was shouting both outside the car but inside the car as well.

"Tori!" came Andre's voice over the phone and I managed a smile even as I struggled to stay awake.

"Yeah" I said finally my voice faint.

"Hey..." Andre said loudly and there was something in his tone that I had never heard before that I might have analysed more if I wasn't coughing up blood, unable to move and crying with pain.

"...Hey..." I said finally.

"I love you" I said again. "I love you and you have to promise me..." I turned and spat out another mouthful of blood. "That you'll be there for Ayden"

Andre's voice came in and out over the phone sounding terrified.

"...Beck I don't know...just drive faster..." his voice changed as my last sentence seemed to creep in on him, when his voice came back on the phone it was dark and filled with a tone I had never heard of him before.

"Don't you dare fucking give up on me Vega" he hissed under his breath. "Don't you dare give up on me now, not after everything we've been through. You don't even think about giving up"

"Andre" I said struggling to breathe again.

"No" Andre snapped back. "Were almost at the accident sight and then were gonna follow you on to the hospital you understand me? You don't get to die on me Vega, not when there's a little boy at home who needs you too much...not when I need you too much..." he lowered his voice until it was barely a whisper.

"Not when I love you too much"

I smiled my eyes finally falling shut I had heard what I wanted to hear and the phone slipped from my fingers and fell down the side of the seat. The voices were getting louder and louder and I knew that it was either a rescue or something else but finally the pain won and I fell into the deep dark abyss of unconsciousness.

In doing so I didn't hear the shout of 'Tori!' over the phone nor did I hear the small groan that followed it. For I was blissfully out.

And it had started to rain.

The Few Seconds of Consciousness

Over the course of my nearly eighteen years on this Earth I had wondered about heaven or hell. I doubt there is one person that hasn't wondered...me...I try not to.

When I woke up for the briefest of seconds it seemed to me like heaven wasn't supposed to have beeping noises or white bright lights or me lying on an uncomfortable bed.

Once the lights assaulted my eyes I glued them shut again. Somehow I had survived looking at the equipment next to me and the drugs that were being pumped through my veins.

I wanted my son but I knew he was with Trina. I wanted...well...

I moved my had slowly feeling like it was a block of wood but my fingers flexed against something and I tried to move my head to see what it was.

It was Andre. He was curled up onto one of the hard chairs near my bed and he was asleep. The angle I was at made it difficult for me to see his face but I dropped my eyes downwards and what I saw made me smile for a second before tears threatened to overwhelm me.

Andre was holding my hand.

And with that image burning under my eyelids I closed my eyes and drifted off into the oblivion.

And let me know what you think.