Chapter 37

Fight or flight. The two options given to me whenever I have faced trouble. I have always favoured the latter, knowing that I was lithe and fast and could probably outrun my problems and try to hide them in some deep, dark place. I also knew that if the decided to stand and fight my problems I would have no chance in hell of coming out on top.

However, I was no longer a scared little girl. I had trained for months and had held my own in battle against men who were much stronger than me. Perhaps I had gotten a little cocky and forgotten how I had needed help back at the battle at the warehouse.

That seemed to explain why, in the midst of having my entire world cave in, I ended up choosing the crazy option.

Before I could stop and think, I had crawled out of Edmund's arms and began stumbling through the passageway on my hands and knees. I was small and could fit comfortably but at this speed I bumped my head and grazed my knees countless times, using such colourful swearwords that would have impressed Oberjarl Erak. The knocks on my head weren't doing any favours for my brain and just added to my worked up state. I wasn't going to let this slip out of my hands. I was going to fight for what was rightfully mine.

I heard Edmund call from behind me, "Mon, come back." He stumbled through the passage on his hands and knees, finally coming to after being equally shocked. I knew he couldn't catch me, with his long legs and muscled arms for once a disadvantage to my petite body.

No tears laced my eyes and instead my jaw was clenched in determination. Some part of me was upset but right now I suppressing it and instead unleashed the prevailing emotion of anger. Pure and raw anger that would not let anything stop its destructive path. I wanted to fight someone. To hit something and release the pain onto something else. I was sick of being on the receiving end of everything. It was time to do something for myself and stand up for my rights. I wasn't going to sit meekly by while some men threw my fate around like a leather ball – not caring about my life and flippantly making decisions. I was going to show those foolish rangers just how good I was and make them regret their decision. I licked my lips in anticipation. They wouldn't know what hit them.

Crawling through the passageway door, I dusted myself off and then began to run. I needed to find the door to the ranger's meeting room while their decision was still fresh in their minds. A part of me hoped that Halt and his former apprentices were still fighting for me and that my appearance would make them change their decision. Halt was the most determined man I had ever met and I knew nothing could stop him when he put his mind to something. I think his ways were rubbing off on me. I subconsciously reached to my left hip and was comforted by the cold blades of my sabre and saxe.

I could hear Edmund's boots scraping on the stone floors as he raced to reach me. Now he was at the advantage with his long legs and I had to outrun him. What I was about to do was crazy and I didn't want Edmund to have to face a choice between joining me or stopping me. I hoped that he would join me but then he had duties as a prince.

I turned a corner and followed the direction that the passageway had taken. Left and right I went, backtracking and trying to find my way. I probably took longer by retracing ground, but I didn't care. I had a single focus right now and nothing short of the castle collapsing was going to stop me.

Finally I found a door with the ranger symbol of an oak leaf engraved on it. Two guards stood either side, barring the entranceway with spears. They were both six-foot tall and I knew I couldn't fight my way in. Although I could easily kill them with my saxe or sabre before they even realised what was happening, I didn't want to become a murderer. Knocking them out would be impossible when I could barely reach their heads so instead I resorted to my tried and tested methods.

Being a lying thief.

I bend over and puffed hard, feigning a desperate run for assistance. "You need to help…the princess…she's not waking up."

"Is Princess Maddie in danger?" One guard asked, his face contorting with concern. They both immediately stood to attention, finally having something to do rather than merely standing at a door protecting the fifty most dangerous men in Araluen. I took a moment to think how stupid it was. It would be easier to get into the ranger meeting room then get out.

"I think she's been poisoned. I'm supposed to be babysitting her and she wouldn't get up and I don't think she's breathing. I couldn't find anyone and everyone was asleep and I just didn't know what to do!" I rambled, choking back desperate sobs.

"We'll go find a doctor immediately," the second guard said as they both ran off, leaving the door completely unguarded. I smiled to myself – it was as easy as taking honey from a baby.

The door creaked on its hinges, no doubt a purposeful neglect on the part of the ranger's so that they would not have any unexpected visitors. This was it. I knew I could still back out but I didn't want to. I didn't care what happened next as long as I got what I wanted. I amended the thought. What I deserved.

Sixty-seven heads turned to face me with quizzical looks on their faces. Dozens instinctively reached for their knives while a few seemed to recognise me and put their weapons away.

"And who in the devil are you?" Jeremy asked pointing his wrinkly finger at me. If he wasn't so old I would have launched myself at him but even I was immoral enough to fight an old man. I was about to answer but Halt beat me to it.

"Mon, you shouldn't be here," he said quietly. His dark eyes mirrored the anger in mine but I knew it wasn't directed at me. Had he been arguing on my behalf? A part of me rejoiced.

"This is a secret ranger meeting young lady," a swarthy-faced ranger said. "What happened to the guards?"

"The infamous Monique Bowman," Merlon said, looking at me intently. His gaze was harsh, judging me and my abilities. I immediately hated him. He had been so antagonistic in the ranger meeting and I could have bet my saxe that he had voted against me. He didn't believe that Victor had been a decent man and no doubt his prejudice extended to the female half of the human race.

"Guilty as charged," I replied, putting my hand on my hip in challenge. I gave him a steely stare, my eyes not wavering for a second. A look of surprise crossed his face, as if he expected me to back off. I would never give in to the likes of him.

"How'd you find out so quickly?" Merlon asked. "I was of the belief that this was a secret meeting." There was a murmur of assent. Oh how deluded the ranger's were. I wondered what else the majority of them were in the dark about. Looking around, Halt and Crowley didn't look surprised in the slightest at my knowledge. At least the ranger leaders were not total numb skulls.

"I have my ways," I replied taking another step into the room and closing the door behind me.

"Mon, we're handling this," Will said, taking a step towards me and holding out his arms placidly.

"What's there to handle?" Jeremy asked.

"Fixing this situation," Gilan put in.

"It's always like this isn't it. Halt and his little posse against everyone else. Will and Gilan always side with him and we always follow along. Remember the time he was banished for insulting the king and no one cared. Oh no. It turned out to be a successful quest despite his inappropriate comments. He could have been hung except that he is Halt and untouchable," Merlon ranted. Quite a few people nodded their heads.

"We voted and the outcome has been reached," a middle-aged ranger said.

"You're right Rob. We can't have people break our rules all the time."

"She should not be in here!" Jeremy exclaimed.

"And why not! I trained for ages so that I could be accepted as a ranger. I'm probably better than most first year apprentices yet you reject me just because I'm a girl! It's ludicrous! You should hear yourselves!" My anger suddenly burst and the words just wouldn't stop.

"Monique the decision has been made and it's final," Crowley stated, his hazel eyes meeting mine and not wavering.

"On what grounds?" I demanded, clenching my fists. "I demand to know! You can't deny me this without a legitimate reason."

"Mon calm down," Will whispered putting his hand on my shoulder. I shrugged him aside.

"I will not calm down!" I yelled back. "These fools have taken something from me and I will not leave till I have it back!"

"How dare you speak to us like that?!" Merlon said walking towards me. "You are just a little girl who somehow thinks she is so privileged just because she happens to be sleeping with a prince. The rangers are independent of the crown and we will not give into your childish tantrums!" Sleeping with a prince? I felt like I had been slapped. How dare he question my virtue? However the verbal slap didn't hurt me. Rather it added kindling to the fire. He had no right to say such things about me and Edmund! I was sure that he could be hanged for his words. I gritted my teeth together, glaring daggers at him.

"Merlon watch your tongue," Halt said. His voice was low but more dangerous because of it. It cut through the room like a knife and Merlon visible winced.

"You can't accuse me of things like that!" I yelled back. His smug face was getting more appealing by the second. I would show them what happened when they doubted me.

"I only speak the truth," he muttered and that was the last straw. He may have thought that I was some harmless gazelle but I was in fact the lion who he had just poked. And poked lions don't just walk away.

I brought my right hand back and smacked him right in the jaw, hearing a satisfying crunch. It had the force of my legs and torso, just as Riley had taught me and was equivalent to a punch that a grown man could throw. Merlon swore in pain and stumbled backwards, nursing his face, which was already turning red. I think there was a collective gasp from the rangers who all stepped closer.

"Don't you dare say things like that!" I yelled, completely losing it. Some part of me was horrified at this new spark of violence but the other side couldn't help but feel satisfied at besting a man, and a ranger no less. I was only sorry that I couldn't see bones protruding from his face.

I was so impressed with myself that I forgot for a second that Merlon was a ranger and trained to respond to violence. He didn't punch me back but instead grabbed my wrists and held them in front of me. I struggled in his grip but his hands were too tight as his dark eyes flared in unadulterated anger.

"I guess you're stupid enough to fight a ranger," he spat. He was holding me away from him and not responding aggressively, but that didn't mean I couldn't give him one hell of a fight.

"Stupid maybe, but skilled enough to best you." And then I kicked his shins as hard as I could, making his knees buckle as he fell to the ground and released me. He swore again using some choice words that weren't very complimentary.

"You bloody bastard!" I yelled back. "You should just go to hell! I have done nothing that deserves that title!" I felt like a wild boar with a never ending well of anger inside. My nose flared as I began banging against Merlon's chest. He fell backwards and I sat on top of him, letting out all my anger and frustration on the infuriating man. He tried to grab my hands but I was too fast for him. Others tried to drag us apart but I slapped away their hands. I knew I wasn't doing him any permanent harm as he blocked many of my blows but I was feeling satisfied as hell. All I could see was his face – a representation of all those rangers who had voted against me. He didn't believe that I could achieve anything on my own. Oh no. He thought that I could only seduce my way to favour when I had done nothing of that sort. I had rescued Daniel before Edmund had even known my name. Some voice told me that I was only making things worse for myself but I blocked it out. Merlon was getting his just reward.

Suddenly Merlon's chest was out of reach and I realised that I was being pulled away by strong arms.

"Mon, you need to stop," Edmund murmured in my ear and I remembered that me and Merlon were not the only two people in the room. Everyone was in uproar and all eyes were on me. Halt looked absolutely furious at Merlon and slightly disappointed at me. Gilan and Will were glaring at Merlon while his friends lifted him off the ground.

"Did you hear what he said?" I cried, hysterically. I knew that I probably looked mental but I no longer cared. I wasn't going to be a ranger. I probably had ruined my chances with my behaviour. People thought that I was some sort of harlot and Halt was disappointed in me.

"He's a bastard. Don't listen to him," Edmund said pulling me away. His voice was soothing but there was still fight left in me.

"He can't say that!"

"Let's go," Edmund continued. I let him drag me out of the room and I was watched on with pity and annoyance by the rangers. Some looked sympathetic but to others I had just confirmed their reservations against females.

"I just really wanted to be a ranger," I whispered. Trent heard me and gave me a sad smile.

It was only when Edmund placed me on a settee and pulled me into his arms that the tears finally came.

† † †

"It's not fair," I sobbed into Edmund's chest. His tunic was soaked with my tears and my face felt cold and wet, but Edmund's chest was warm and comforting. I could have stayed like this forever and oddly the thought of being so tied down to him didn't daunt me. He smelt sweet and musky and the scent went a fair way in calming me.

"I know sweetheart," Edmund replied, pulling me closer – if that was even possible. "They were wrong to deny you just because you're a girl. But don't worry. We'll fix it. Evanlyn will make sure that you're a ranger." His words had such a conviction behind them that I immediately believed him and decided to let slip his little term of endearment. Usually I would have demanded him to never use it again but it was growing on me.

I looked up into his eyes. "Really? Is she allowed to?"

Edmund smiled softly. "She's the queen. She can do whatever the hell she wants." Something tugged at the back of my mind. Something about Edmund's words reminded me of something I had been told. I couldn't quite grasp it at the moment and was soon distracted by Edmund moving. He leant forward and grabbed a silver container from a mahogany side table. I wiped away my tears and watched, in curiosity, as he unscrewed the lid on the box and took out a little brown cube.

"What is it?" I asked.

"It's chocolate," Edmund answered and I felt a bit of excitement takeover my pain and anger.

"You're a bit late on your promise, prince," I teased, licking my lip in anticipation. I could smell something sweet.

"Better late than never," Edmund said with a smile. "And I think this will make you feel better." I reached out to take the piece but Edmund, teasingly, held it out of my grasp. Instead he brought his hand to my mouth and ran his finger over my lips slowly. I instinctively closed my eyes and opened my mouth as Edmund placed the chocolate on my tongue. It melted immediately and coated my tongue with a sweet burst. I had never tasted anything like it before and sighed in appreciation, opening my eyes.

"Gorlog's tongue! That's divine!" I exclaimed as Edmund popped a piece in his mouth. "Why don't we eat that every day?"

"Because it's ridiculously expensive," Edmund replied lazily. "But you, beautiful, can eat as much as you want."

"I intend to," I replied and then sat up to get some more. I knew I was being a pig but I took a handful and practically stuffed my face with the chocolate. Edmund watched on in amusement but I didn't care if I was making a fool of myself. I would parade around in a pink dress and dance a million dances for more of this. Actually maybe only a few dozen dances.

"Mmmm," I moaned, reaching for some more but this time Edmund held the container out of my reach.

"Edmund!" I whined, sitting up on my knees so that I might reach, but Edmund's arms were just too long.

"Too much chocolate is not good," he chastised. "You have just eaten half of my fortune in two seconds." I hoped he was exaggerating.

"You can't do this!" I said standing on the settee suddenly and lunging for the box. I surprised Edmund by my sudden addiction for chocolate and yelled in triumph as my fingers grasped the box. Unfortunately I had thrown caution to the wind in the process and wobbled in my precarious position, seeing the floor and knowing we were about to get painfully reacquainted. However, Edmund grabbed me at the last second. He plopped me down on the settee and decided that I should instead get reacquainted with his lips as he showered my face with kisses.

I laughed at his antics. "Your beard tickles!" I tried to push him away but the prince was determined. I didn't know when he had last shaved but prickly little hairs were brushing over my skin.

"Edmund Oswald Mathias! Get off!" I squirmed.

"Are you complaining about me kissing you?" he asked, raising his eyebrow.

"You're getting spit on me!" I complained, wiping something off my chin in disgust.

Edmund was unperturbed and grinned but pulled away to stare at me with a serious look in his eyes as he inspected my face carefully.

"We should talk about it." The memories of the morning which I had forgotten with Edmund's distractions came back and I felt a deep void of disappointment. I wanted to forget about it and just pretend that everything was perfect – which was easy to do with Edmund's idea of diversions. Very, very easy… However, I knew that I had to deal with it at some point.

We sat up and I closed my eyes in mortification, remembering how angry I had got.

I groaned. "They'll never let me become a ranger now since I hit Merlon."

"The bastard deserved it," Edmund put in.

"But still, now they think I'm crazy," I said with a frown. I had just about kissed all my chances goodbye with that punch. Halt and Will and Gilan had been arguing for me but I hadn't done anything to help them. Yet a part of me was satisfied with that punch and didn't regret it. Merlon deserved that and more.

"You keep forgetting that Evanlyn is queen," Edmund said. "She can do anything."

"But who will train me? And when there are gatherings they'll all laugh at me."

"Well Halt would train you and they wouldn't dare to say anything against you."

I sighed. "Halt looked disappointed in me. That's the worst part. If he agreed with what I did then maybe I could see a sliver of hope but he looked so disappointed."

Edmund shook his head. "He was annoyed that you lashed in front of all the rangers but he looked happy that Merlon had gotten what was coming his way. And remind me never to make you angry because you can throw better punches then lots of men I know."

I grinned at that. "And wiping that stupid look of his face was the best feeling ever."

"If you hadn't had done it I would have done it myself. The things he said were completely uncalled for. You've become so skilled through your own hard work and nothing else," Edmund said and my smile widened.

"Prince that's the best thing I've heard all day. I could kiss you!" I exclaimed.

Edmund smirked. "I think I'll take you up on that offer." I slapped his arm but leaned forward all the same. We were being quite affectionate lately and I relished it. It made me think that I had been right in telling Edmund that I loved him and that he wouldn't bail on me. It felt so natural and so right and despite sounding like a silly twit I did want it to last forever.

"Edmund do you have any idea why they're saying something is wrong with Maddie..." Cassandra asked walking in, but neither of us heard her the first time and she was not spared what happened next.

"Edmund," I sighed, running my fingers through the prince's soft hair and pulling him closer.

"Oh gods," he murmured under his breath. It was all so perfect

It seemed to be a curse of ours to be constantly interrupted when we were in the middle of something that could be extremely embarrassing. I had died of embarrassment so many times that I must have been close to the grave this time.

"Oh gods indeed!" Cassandra said making us start. I opened my eyes to see the newly crowned queen smirking at us as Edmund and I jumped apart. I made myself busy adjusting my tunic, while Edmund combed his fingers through the hair that I had just messed up.

"Please have some self control you two! Now I know how Maddie feels when she walks in on you two glued at the lips!" I blushed profusely and looked down at the ground.

"We were not," Edmund stated. "And that doesn't seem like an appropriate level of colloquialism for a Queen, your majesty." I had no idea what colloquialism meant but made a mental note to ask.

"Pish posh," Cassandra said with a wave of her hand. "Don't be a smart ass, Ed."

Just then Horace barged in as well, looking for his wife. "Oh there you are Cassie. Do these two know why those guards seem to think Maddie is sick?"

"Mon, I've been looking all over for you," Halt said, following close behind him, with Will and Gilan training. Was the entire universe against me and Edmund? All I knew was that this was not going to end well.

The four men took in their surroundings. Our rumpled clothes and hair. No doubt rosy cheeks and reddened lips. The smirk on Cassandra's lips and to top it all off, the fact that we were in Edmund's quarters. I hadn't even realised till now but had to gape at the surroundings. Edmund's living quarters were decorated with green and silver trimming. There were paintings of noble looking people on the walls and numerous vases sitting on intricately carved stools. There was one painting in particular that caught my attention. It depicted a beautiful woman with skin so white and hair such a light blonde that I could have sworn she was an angel. On her lap was a little dark haired boy with vividly green eyes that matched her own. Immediately I knew that it was Edmund and his mother, Princess Gemma and I was in awe.

I could have stared at it forever but had more pressing matters to attend to. Namely saving my own skin.

Will coughed. "I don't know what protocol dictates but I'm pretty sure Alyss would say that this is not the appropriate level of behaviour while the two of you are merely courting."

"Unless they are engaged as common gossip predicts," Gilan added. "I have it from quite a reliable source."

Horace's eyes widened. "Maddie has been right on the money many times before."

"No, no and no," I said, hoping the repetition would drill it deep into their brains. Edmund wasn't quick to retaliate and I knew it would lead to our downfall as Will seized the opportunity.

"What does Edmund think about that?" Will teased, his eyebrows reaching the ceiling.

"There is no engagement," Edmund answered, rolling his eyes.

"How can you be sure?" Cassandra asked with a smirk. Becoming queen really hadn't changed her at all. If anything she had become worse.

"Notice all that he doesn't deny that there might be one in the future," Gilan added.

"You guys are horrible…" Edmund trailed off as the adults smirked.

Halt cleared his throat – small blessings. "We have some actually important matters to discuss here so all of you be quiet. I think we should head to Evanlyn's office." The four demons shut up but didn't stop giving us weird looks.

"You guys are horrible," I said, sticking my tongue out. Will just raised his eyebrows suggestively. He had definitely drunk multiple bottles of wine last night. I was completely certain.