Disclaimer: Don't own.

Author's Note: Thanks for the love. And Cretin, I'm taking that nickname to heart :) It's one of the cooler ones as far as nicknames go.

Chapter 36 – Bitter Dawn

Gandalf, Pippin, Peter and Edmund left that morning. The siblings had sensed Peter's foul mood and walked around on eggshells until their departure. Susan had even gone so far as to offer him to ride on Nimzülae, which Peter crossly refused. It was her horse, she should keep it. Gandalf had sent Susan a peeved look for trying to trade horses. She responded by ignoring him the rest of the morning. Did he think she didn't know Nim was more than just a horse? That was precisely why she felt Peter should have ridden her. Nim seemed wasted on herself.

After their departure, the remaining members of the Fellowship had eaten a quiet breakfast until Aragorn saw fit to break it. "Gandalf intends to light the beacons to call Théoden for aid. The king will have no choice but to answer the call."

"He could refuse though, right?" Susan cautiously asked. She relished the chance to dispel the tense atmosphere that lingered and jumped at Aragorn's in.

"Yes," the ranger answered while he picked at his porridge.

Realizing she had said the wrong thing, Susan again clammed up and focused on eating her food quietly. As if a heaven sent, Lucy suddenly decided she had had enough silence and sighed loudly. She let her head thump against Susan's shoulder which instantly brought smiles to their faces. Later on Lucy quietly asked her sister if Peter was mad at her. Susan told her that their brother was just anxious and reminded Lucy of all the times he had been worried for them. As she said it, she recognized an alarming pattern in her brother's moods. Whenever he was worried about one of them it would come off as anger. And because the siblings were so incredibly in tuned to each other's feelings it often darkened the collective mood.

Susan decided to focus on finding her sister a horse and getting them both ready to leave when the call came. Lucy embraced the attempt at distraction wholeheartedly and spent the whole day with Eowyn and Susan, trying to find just the right horse.

When the sun dipped lower in the sky and the air cooled, there was still no word from the others. Susan wondered anxiously how long it would take. How long she could keep herself and Lucy occupied until word came.

On the move…

No one spoke all day. Gandalf tried valiantly to engage both Peter and Edmund in conversation, but only succeeded in rousing Pippin's curiosity at every piece of tuft that blew by them. The hobbit was an endless well of questions and not even Gandalf's growls could hold him off. "I'll go look for more wood." Peter announced and left the party.

Though it was a three day journey, it was the only time they would stop to rest, so Pippin insisted they make a hot meal. "I'll come with you." Edmund said quickly. He could tell by the glare that his brother resented the company, but didn't speak up against it. The youngest King half expected a lecture on the importance of privacy, or at the very least a frustrated "Edmund". But Peter said nothing. Edmund's shoulders slumped and he meekly followed his brother. He wasn't sure where Peter intended to find said firewood – their surroundings were quite flat – but figured the insight wouldn't be welcome just then. Instead he set about picking what little twigs there were. Peter followed his move, coming to the same conclusion as his brother, but too proud to admit it.

It was only five minutes until Edmund reached his limit. "Why are you being such a dolt?" He hurled down every twig he had gathered in an open show of frustration.

Peter grumbled something and kept moving, but Edmund wouldn't have it.

"Peter, look at me!"

His older brother stopped and turned with a lethal glare. "I'd rather just get this done."

"Is it because I wouldn't listen to you?" Edmund pressed. He knew that was exactly the reason, whether Peter wanted to admit it or not.

"No."

The youngest brother actually growled. "Would you have reacted like this if it was Susan?" he challenged.

Peter stopped, sighed and hurled down his own twigs. "I didn't ask for this-"

"None of us did!" Edmund roared. His poor sleep had made him short tempered and his brother's ignorance was only adding to the frustration. "But you promised you would listen instead of always trying to have your way with everything!" It was just one step shy of calling him bossy and Edmund knew he was coming dangerously close to sounding like a child.

"You should have stayed with Lucy and Susan!" he roared. "They need your help more than I do."

Edmund paled a little and knew his brother noticed by the guilty look that flashed across his face. "I thought I explained my feelings about this to you,"

"I know, back to back, side by side. We've been fighting that way for years, Edmund."

"Not just fighting, Peter." He moved a step closer, not entirely sure his brother wouldn't take a swing at him in his current mood. "With everything. Oreus beat that mantra into our heads and it stuck. We used to do everything together," He took another cautious step. "Or do you not remember?"

Peter huffily ran a hand over his face, but didn't answer.

Edmund took another step. Just one more and he could reach out. "I'm not just with you because I think you need protection. Did it ever occur to you that I might need you?" It must have been his earnest expression that made his brother look so guilty.

It had, but in the heat of the concern for his siblings and anger that they constantly went against his wishes, Peter had forgotten it. He was acutely aware that his brother might still be reeling from his horrible experience with Saruman, but in his pride he had ignored it. The shame crashed over him like a wave. Edmund was breathing deeply as if he had just run a mile. "I've been horrible. I forgot what I promised last night."

The dark-haired Pevensie flashed a quick smirk that almost reached his eyes. "It was only last night. It needs time to fester."

Peter smirked at the poor attempt at absolution. "It doesn't excuse me, Edmund. I was an absolute beast to you and the girls this morning."

"They know why, Peter, it's alright."

The oldest Pevensie took two, long steps and grabbed his brother's arms. He opened his mouth to speak, but fell short when no words came to him. He gave Edmund a halfhearted shove without letting go. "I'm sorry. . ." he said lamely. He suddenly realized how comforting it was to hold his brother. Even if Edmund didn't need the comfort, it always made Peter feel better to give it. Especially after apologizing for being a dolt.

"I know, brother." Edmund smirked and allowed himself to be shaken. "Our sisters know too."

Peter glanced down, but couldn't manage to hide his sad expression. Edmund huffed loudly and earned a quick, guilt ridden smile from his older brother. The guilty smile turned sad again as something struck Peter. "I heard you last night." He watched in regret as his brother reeled in his emotions lightning quick. "What was it about?"

Edmund cleared his throat unconsciously and started picking the twigs he'd dropped. "Saruman." he whispered.

Peter shivered at his brother's physical reaction. "I never want you to go through that again." he sighed into the cool air.

Edmund huffed. "There wasn't much you could do, Peter-"

"Not that." he interrupted. "The nightmare. I want to help you get through this." He made sure to try and catch his brother's eye. "I want you to know you can always come to me," Edmund still refused to look directly at him. "Doesn't matter if we've been fighting. You can always talk to me and I want you to. Understand?"

Edmund nodded jerkily.

Peter accepted that this was all he would get from his brother and let go. "I think we should get back. Gandalf is probably getting worried."

"Or sick of Pippin's questions," Edmund fired off like a whip.

Peter laughed earnestly and picked up the twigs he had dropped. Edmund followed, as he had every day of their reign, half a step behind his brother.

True to his word, Gandalf seemed pleased to have them back where he could keep an eye on them. Peter noticed the way the old wizard spoke to Edmund and smiled. It seemed Gandalf had taken a liking to his brother and who was Peter to fault him? He, himself had nothing but pride and love for Edmund.

Pippin proudly announced that he was making beef stew and praised both brothers for finding so much wood. Peter looked at the slim pile doubtfully, but reminded himself that hobbit size was a great deal smaller than normal human sizes. It seemed to be a uniquely hobbitesque trait since he couldn't remember Narnian dwarves ever dealing with everything in smaller amounts.

Despite portion size, the meal was filling and tasty. When asked, Pippin delved into a monologue on the importance of herbs and mushrooms. Peter cowed under the dirty look Edmund sent him for asking. After the meal Gandalf wanted to mount and continue riding, but Peter was worried that his brother needed rest. Edmund cut him off from speaking by agreeing with Gandalf. And so they mounted. The sun had set and the sky was darkening. Half of the eastern sky, their current heading, was already deep blue; filled with unfamiliar constellations twinkling down at them. To the west there was still a faint glow across the horizon. Peter kept turning in his saddle to catch the last glimpses of light. He loosened the reins to Axis and tried to compare this sunset to a Narnian one.

He frowned when he couldn't recall any particular Narnian sunset. Even more so when he thought that he might never again see one again.

AN: TBC.