A/N: Oh, look! A human's made it into one of my works, wonder how that happened. But anyway, you recall a certain piece of disgruntled furniture, yes? Well, she's baaaack.

Disclaimer: I can claim the crazy furniture maybe, but that's about it.

The Ape is back, yes, The Ape. I have seen him massacre many of my friends and neighbours; it's a miracle if a path of destruction isn't left in his wake. It might have just been a can storm last time, but I know he's due to break something again soon. And I won't let it be me.

"To the left, yer bangin' me inta the wall ya lame brain!"

"Well if ya were holdin' up yer side I wouldn' hafta drag it, chrome-dome!"

I… I thought they were just kidding when they were talking about the other couch, but… there it is, getting the stuffing knocked out of it by the muscle-heads. Oh! Maybe Monkeyman will break it before they even get it in. His destruction levels always multiply when coupled with mouthy over there.

I must have some telepathic abilities. Ape just dropped his end on his foot. He's now howling and hopping about on one foot, spinning around like some overly large and ugly Jack-in-the-box on a Merry-Go-Round. Children would be traumatized.

"What the shell is going on i-" SMACK

Oh, poor purple. He never stood a chance against the whirling mountain from hell. Red's smirking, going over to help his poor brother up and jeer at the mountain of a monkey. Come love, take a load off and regain your senses. I'll keep you comfy while you recuperate.

I sigh when instead purple just stands and shakes himself, grumbling at the others.

"Hey, is that the new couch?" he says, catching sight of my abandoned replacement. Damn it, still in one piece.

Rude answers while still laughing at Mt. Demolish, who is wobbly getting to his smelly ape feet. "Yeah, April said we could take it. Finally get rid of the lumpy dinosaur."

Oh! I may be older then you, boy, but I am not a dinosaur! Your reptilian ass is so getting a spring in it next time you sit down.

And it's not my fault I'm lumpy. You boys never learn… or listen. I whopped you 2 weeks ago and yet you continue on like nothing happened, bouncing, bumping, sloshing and rough-housing. It's your fault my joints are stuck and starting to… to rust. Rust! I'm too young to rust!

But of course, they continue on like I'm not even here, ignoring me while admiring the new piece of furniture. They just like her because she's green. I am getting a rather nice view of some backsides though. What? I may be a pull-out but that doesn't mean I can't window shop.

"Alright, c'mon Case," Sharp Tongue says, stretching before turning my way, "let's dump this heap already. I wanna get back in time fer kick-off."

We're dusting off all the insults today aren't we? Well then I won't play nice either.

They surround me and by their power I'm suddenly floating my way towards the door. I may be rusting, I may be lumpy, I may even have a few loose springs, and I realize that my time is up, but I will not be going quietly. They stumble on the stairs and I know my chance has come.

I move with the momentum and smack the two dolts in the head with my backrest, followed not-so-swiftly with a blow to their guts (not where I had been aiming but I'll take what I can get) by my protruding mattress, and to finish them off, I fall squarely onto both their stupid, overly large, man feet. Take that and chew on it.

A/N: And there goes the overly dramatic, yet very amusing, pull-out. I've enjoyed beating the boys up with the furniture, hehehe. Ah you shall be missed, dear Penelope, you shall be missed.

TBW's Sister: But, you know, the Foot ninja could pick her up.