Chapter 37: First Day Back After The Clinic
Harry and Albus enjoyed a quiet lunch and dinner the previous day as Harry settled into Hogwarts and checked to be sure he was ready to start classes again. Harry headed to the Great Hall for breakfast the next morning. Ron and Hermione threw their arms around Harry before steering him to the Gryffindor table. He took out his schedule and saw that he had Transfiguration first. He was so nervous that he only ate about a quarter of his meal. He hadn't had any problems with Professor McGonagall in the past but her stern voice always made him want to get away. But it was her teaching style and necessary to keep them all safe and paying attention so Harry realized he just had to relax.
Harry hurried off to Transfiguration just in time; somehow he'd gotten separated from Ron and Hermione. A few minutes into the class, Harry found that he was having trouble concentrating. He glared at his notes, as if they were the cause.
"Mr. Potter," said Professor McGonagall. "Please stay after class."
As soon as the last student left, Professor McGonagall said, "Mr. Potter, why are you having trouble concentrating?"
Harry sighed. "I have other stuff on my mind," he said. "But I don't get it! I did all the homework while I was at the clinic! Why can't I do anything now?"
"Miss Granger gave you the necessary notes. You were able to do the homework by using the notes you were provided. Now, you have to use a quill and ink and write your own notes, and if you're in your own little world, that can change everything. Are you worried about something?"
"I'm just worried that I'll be bad again and land myself back where I was before," Harry said.
"As I already said a couple weeks ago, I'll do my best not to snap at you," Professor McGonagall said. "But I can't help it if someone else gets on the wrong side of me. But just know that I'm not angry with you in those situations. There's no reason to be worried."
"Do you think I have a learning problem?" Harry asked worriedly.
If he had a disorder, he might as well head back to the clinic or St. Mungo's. None of the teachers would want him if he couldn't learn. Harry didn't realize that he was getting himself into a panic attack until he felt a vial being pressed to his lips. He swallowed and looked around. Professor McGonagall was kneeling down, looking concerned. She was holding the empty vial in her hand.
"Why did you have that potion?" Harry asked, surprised.
"Professor Snape gave each teacher some of the potion, just in case," she said. "Now, I sent Professor Snape a message explaining why you'll be missing class. Madam Pomfrey is waiting for you to arrive for your nap. Go. And Mr. Potter, I don't think you have a learning problem. I'll contact Albus to see if you can see your healer today."
Harry felt a lump in his throat. He must have a learning problem if he wasn't concentrating, so why was his head of house denying it? Harry dragged his feet to the infirmary and was bustled into a bed in a private room by Madam Pomfrey who promised to wake him for lunch. She kept her word and released Harry after he ate. Harry headed for the greenhouses. An afternoon of digging in the dirt was quite relaxing. After all his classes, he headed back to Albus' quarters. When he entered Albus' office, Albus stopped him from going to his room.
"Harry, Jeff will be here soon," he said. "We're going to be talking about what happened today."
"I swear I didn't mean to do so bad in classes!" Harry said.
"Harry, I do not think this is anything too serious," Albus said. "I think you merely have too many worries at the moment. It's hard to concentrate when you're worried."
"But I was fine with taking notes and everything before I left!" Harry exclaimed.
There was a knock at the door. Jeff came in and greeted both Albus and Harry.
"Harry, I heard about what happened today," he said. "I would like to talk to you about what might be bothering you. I hope you don't mind if Albus joins in on this subject, seeing as whatever you're worried about is affecting your education."
"I am just worried that I'll mess up here again," Harry said.
"Worried that you'll end up back around all of those annoying healers?" Jeff asked teasingly.
"I guess so," Harry said.
"There's no need to worry," Jeff said, taking Harry's hands in comfort. "Now that you're working with us, not against us, you're more open about the topics, it'll take you a lot more than just a little mess up to get you back into the clinic. You don't need to worry."
"But I freaked out this morning just because I think I have a learning disorder!" Harry said.
"You do not have a learning disorder," Jeff said. "If you did, Roes would have found it in her assessments, and I would have noticed something way before now."
"But how do we fix the problem?" Harry asked.
"Keep talking with me," Jeff said. "If you're worried about something, tell me or Albus."
"Do you think we need to shorten his schedule?" Albus asked.
Harry shook his head right away. No, not that!
"No, that won't be something to worry about," Jeff said. "If Harry has problems doing his homework and his level of stress increases just from school, then we'll consider it. But just for having trouble with taking notes because he's worried is not a reason to shorten his schedule."
Harry was relieved. He felt better now that he knew that there was nothing wrong with his learning.