Regina's hand trembled as she withdrew the dagger. She sank slowly down the tree trunk until she sat shaking on the ground. She held the blade to her wrist, and closed her eyes. There was no other choice, she had to do this. After everything that had happened, where did she have to turn now? Her mother had been banished for her treason, her father had fled the realm in fear for his life, and Daniel. . . she had left without saying goodbye. She couldn't look him in the eye. Not after the unspeakable crime her mother had committed. She was ashamed. So, so ashamed. She hated that she had come from Cora. And it scared her more than anything that she had her blood flowing through her veins. How much more of her mother was in her? Would she do the same and succumb to evil? No, she had to end this now, before she hurt anyone. How could she live like this?
Her breath became shallower and faster the harder she pressed the blade to her skin, but she didn't have the courage to push it any farther. Her hand began shaking so badly that she couldn't even hold the dagger steadily, and she threw it angrily aside. Why couldn't she do this? What in the world did she have to live for?
"Regina!" a voice came from the distance. "Regina!" it called louder.
Regina looked up sharply when she heard Daniel's voice. No, he couldn't be here. Why had he come? She snatched the dagger again and held it to her wrist. She had to do this before Daniel came. If not, he would find some way to convince her not to, and she didn't want to face him. She began sobbing quietly, still unable to do it.
"Regina!" he called when he saw her.
When he got to her, she had dropped the dagger again because she was crying so hard. She couldn't do it. She was weak. "Regina," he said as he knelt down next to her. "I've been searching for you all day. Why did you leave without telling me? Why would you do that to me? After everything we've been through, don't you think I deserved an explanation?"
Regina became angry, but didn't look at him. "Why did you come after me? I didn't want you to come. I don't want to see you."
"We both know that's a lie, Regina."
"Very well, it's a lie," she snapped. "I didn't want you to come because I can't look at you in the eye. What my mother did—"
"Your mother made her own decisions. Do you really think I would cast you away or think any less of you because of what she's done? Don't you realize that I love you?"
"Don't," she said, "It's too late. It's too late for us," she said, picking up the dagger again. "But I can make this right."
Daniel froze, now noticing the dagger in her hand. "Regina, don't. Don't even think about it. You are innocent of your mother's crimes. You have nothing to pay; nothing to prove. What will taking your own life solve?"
"This is the only way I can make sure that I don't turn out like her. That I don't hurt anyone."
He tried to snatch the dagger away, but she stood up and took a few steps back. "Regina, what are you thinking?! You are nothing like Cora. Nothing! You are just as horrified as I at what your mother has done, so much so that you want to take your own life to try and prevent yourself from becoming her. That alone shows that you are nothing like her. Please, don't do this. You have so much to live for."
"I have nothing!" she shrieked. She pressed the dagger to her veins.
"Regina, please!" he cried, falling to his knees. "You don't have nothing. Do you understand that? You have me. I will always be there for you. Regina, I love you, and if you do this, it will ruin me. I don't want to live without you."
She finally looked at him with tears falling freely from her eyes. "Do you really love me?" she asked, uncertainly.
Had she not heard anything he had told her? "I love you with everything I am," he said.
She lowered the blade slowly, and he stood up. He stepped forward and took the dagger away from her. "Regina, I love you. I love you so much. I don't want to lose you. I can't lose you."
"How could you love me after this?" she asked brokenly.
"You didn't do this. I will always love you Regina, always. No matter what happens, no matter what you do, I will always love you."
Without a word, she went into his arms and began sobbing. He held her closely and kissed her temple. "I love you, Regina."
Regina opened her eyes, and realized that she had been crying in her sleep. She wiped her eyes angrily. Ever since the night she had lost him, her dreams had been full of her husband. She looked over her shoulder at the Huntsman, who was staring at her smugly at seeing her cry. She sat up quickly and slapped him in the face. "Get out!" she shrieked.
Without a moment's hesitation, he got up and grabbed his clothes and left the room. Regina threw the blankets off and snatched her clothes from the ground. Every time she sent for the Huntsman, she did it out of anger and a desire to hurt him. But every morning when she woke up, she was filled with shame. Daniel had only been dead a few months, and here she was sleeping with another man. She justified it by telling herself that it wasn't because she had any love for the Huntsman, she did it because she knew he hated him and this would be a worse punishment than anything else. It hurt him in a way that no amount of bodily harm could. He had a hand in taking Daniel's life, and now she was going to take away his humanity.
It was justly done.
When she left her chambers, she saw the Genie of Agrabah waiting for her. "My lady," he said, bowing low. "I apologize for disturbing you, but it has been so long since I've seen you."
"Leave me alone, Genie," she said dryly, brushing past him.
"But my lady," he called after her. "You said we could be together now. You said when the task was done and you were queen, we could be together."
She spun around angrily. "Did you really believe that I loved you? Did you really think for one second that I actually cared? You had a job to do, and you couldn't even do it! You're worth nothing to me now. Just leave."
The genie was taken aback by her harsh words, and couldn't find any words for a long moment. "But you said. . ." he couldn't finish. "Regina, I love you."
Regina rolled her eyes. "I don't care about you. I never did! Do you really think I would ever have chosen you over my husband? You are nothing compared to him!" Her brow furrowed with pain as she thought of him. "All I wanted you for was to complete a job. I don't need you anymore," she said. She turned around to walk away.
"Regina, please, I never want to be parted from you," he called after her.
One more time, she faced him. She strode to him purposefully. "You never want to be parted from me? Very well," she said and lifted her hand toward him.
"What are you doing?" he asked, nearing on panic.
"What you wanted me to do," she said through her teeth. No coherent thoughts went through her mind as she through her hands toward him, but she could tell by the power she felt draining from her that she'd done something drastic. She watched as thick smoke enveloped him, and when it drew back, he was gone.
"No. No!" came a metallic sounding voice.
Regina looked around, not exactly sure what she had done. She hadn't been thinking, she was just so angry and acted on impulse. She spun around, searching for the genie, but she couldn't see him. When she heard a banging noise from the wall, she looked at it, and saw him in the mirror. She stepped closer in shock. He was literally, in the mirror. A cruel smile played on her lips. "Well, it seems you've gotten what you wanted," she said. "Now, you will never be parted from me."
The genie's eyes filled with tears, and he shook his head numbly.
"Like you always say, magic always comes with a price, doesn't it?"
ooOoo
Things were going more smoothly as time went on. It took a long time to get used to the silence caused by Danny's absence, but no one mentioned it. Snow seemed to be doing better, thankfully, but he wondered if she was just putting on a show for his sake. It wouldn't surprise him. When Danny had still been with them, she hadn't allowed herself to be weak because of the boy. Snow was, by nature, always thinking of others instead of tending to her own needs, and it worried him.
"Are you alright?" he asked when they were getting ready to set off.
"Yes, I'm alright," she said as she pulled her pack on.
"Are you sure?"
"David, I'm fine. I'm just done being the victim, alright? Nothing is going to change, so there is no point in moping about it; it's time to move on."
"Snow. . ."
"Really, David, I'm alright. If I wasn't, I would tell you."
"Would you?"
She frowned. "Maybe not. But right now, I'm fine. I promise. But I'm not going to cry about it. I'm done being a victim," she said again.
"Alright," he said, and kissed her forehead. "Let's go."
The day before, they had finally crossed the border. Thankfully, they passed without incident. David was grateful for that; the last thing any of them needed was another attack. Now that the border was behind them, he felt like he could breathe again. Maybe now, they could take an occasional rest in an inn instead of always camping in the middle of the forest. He and Lancelot were used to that well enough, but he knew it was probably hard on Snow. She had lived in comfort her entire life, and although she wasn't soft, she just wasn't used to this kind of lifestyle yet, and a rest would do her good. Especially with the increasingly cold weather.
The day passed in mostly silence and was largely uneventful. Maybe that was a good thing.
It was getting dark, and David kept his eyes open for a good place to settle for the night.
"Look," Snow said beside him, and gestured ahead of them. The forest ended abruptly a few yards away, and beyond that, they could see a small town, its lights glowing in the darkness. He saw the hope in her eyes as she gazed at it, yearning for civilization.
"Shall we stay a day or two?" he asked.
Snow looked at him, shocked. "Really?" she searched his eyes.
David couldn't hide the smile playing on his lips at how excited she was. He glanced at Lancelot. "What do you think?"
"I think a rest would do us all some good," the knight said.
"Well then let's not waste any time," she said, already starting forward.
"Wait," he said, grabbing her arm. "It still isn't safe for you to be out in the open. I don't doubt even here some might recognize you. Did you bring a cloak?"
"No," she said.
He shrugged out of his pack and opened it, fishing through the contents. He pulled out a long brown cloak and handed it to her. "Wear this, and try to hide your face as much as possible. I doubt people will be suspicious since it's been cold lately."
Snow took it eagerly and put it on, then brought the hood up. With that, they set off, and David could feel the excitement in her hand as he held it. It didn't take long to find the inn, since it was the largest building in the town.
"You both should wait here while I go inside to get our room," Lancelot said. "You are just as easily recognizable as is Snow, and I don't want to risk either of you being spotted."
"If you think that's necessary," he said, although he was fairly certain less people would know what he looked like. Lancelot nodded and went inside, and David waited with Snow by the door.
"I can't believe I'm going to stay in an actual room tonight," Snow sighed while leaning on the wall.
David smiled, glad that she was happy. "Once we get far enough away, we can find somewhere safe where we can stay without having to move around all the time."
"Do you know how much farther we're going to be traveling?"
"No," he said, rubbing the back of his neck. "I suppose that is something we can discuss during our stay here. Don't worry," he touched her cheek lightly. "We'll figure it out."
Lancelot came out a moment later. "I ordered two rooms for us," he said, satisfied with himself.
"Two rooms?" Snow repeated, and David could feel his face flushing at the implication.
"Yes," Lancelot said quickly. "So you can have your own," he said to Snow.
"Oh," she said, a bit too relieved. "Well, let's go, shall we?" she said uncomfortably, and went inside.
David cast Lancelot a wry look and smacked him on the arm as he followed.
ooOoo
They all walked up the stairs and found their rooms. Hers was right next to the other, probably because they wanted to stay close for safety. Lancelot opened the door to one of them, and they all walked inside. "This one is yours. It's bigger, and has a window."
"Thank you," she said, looking around. It wasn't anything special. In fact, the only stick of furniture in the room was the bed, along with a metal bathtub and a chamber pot, but she was so glad to be there. Something about being surrounded by four walls again was comforting.
"We can rest for the night now. Tomorrow we should get some supplies in the market. The way the weather is getting colder, we are going to have to buy some warmer clothes." the knight asked.
"Yes, of course," she said.
After they left, she ordered the bath filled, and a servant girl came to fill it with hot water. She tried as much as she could to keep her back turned to her so she couldn't see her face, but it was difficult. In any case, it was doubtful that a servant working in an inn, in another realm no less, would know what she looked like. When it was finally done, the servant brought a tray that held a small basin of water to wash her hair, a small flask of scented oil, and a robe. After she left, she drew the window curtains and pushed the bed in front of the door to keep any intruders out.
She removed her dirty clothes, and wondered if washing clothes was a service that the inn provided. After three weeks of being outside, she felt filthy, as did her clothes. When she stepped in the tub, she sighed in relief. She was never going to take a bath for granted again. When Red had still been with them, the two of them would leave the group for privacy to clean up, but even then, it was only a partial bath and she never felt clean.
She took her time, relaxing in the warmth. She wondered how Red was, and if she had made it back home safely. There was no way to communicate with her; letters wouldn't be safe, because she didn't doubt it that Regina was having all mail monitored by her men. She missed her friend. She loved David and Lancelot, but being with no one but men was a bit tiring after a while. Red was always able to make her laugh, and was always someone to talk to. But she was glad that she had left; this way, she would be safe and Regina wouldn't find her.
When the water started getting cold, she slipped out and wrapped the robe around herself and knelt in front of a basin. She bent forward and dipped her hair in, letting the water seep into it. Then she took the flask of oil and dabbed a bit on her palms and rubbed them together. She worked it into her scalp, massaging away all the filth. It was unnerving how dirty the water was after she was done, but at last, she felt clean. She didn't like the thought of putting her dirty clothes back on, but there was no other option. Perhaps she could get more at the market.
Finally, she went to bed. It was nothing compared to the bed she had in the castle, but even the thin pallet felt like heaven after weeks of the rough ground.
The next morning came all too soon. She was awake, but still lying in bed when someone knocked on the door. "It's me, David," he said.
Snow got up quickly and ran a hand over her hair before she opened the door. She smiled when she saw David and opened the door further to let him in.
"Lancelot will be here in a moment. How did you sleep last night?" he asked.
"Like a baby," she said and wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.
"What was that for?" he asked with a half-smile.
"Just because," she said and gave him another peck. "You know, I've always loved that."
"What?"
"That smile you just had where one side goes up higher than the other."
"Does it?" he asked, touching his mouth.
"Mhmm." In fact, his whole face wasn't symmetrical. His right eye was slightly thinner on one end, his nose was a bit crooked, and one corner of his mouth was slightly curved upward. But somehow his imperfections made him all the more beautiful. "You shaved."
His mouth tipped as he felt his smooth jaw. "I was getting shaggy. I've never liked beards."
"It made you look like a barbarian," she teased. She removed her arms when she heard Lancelot knock on the door. No doubt he felt uncomfortable walking in on them. "Come in," she called.
He gave them both an awkward glance as he came in, so she went to sit on her bed to put distance between herself and David. The knight didn't waste time on greetings and went right to the problem at hand. "We need to figure out what we're going to do. Now that we're out of the realm, we need to have a plan."
"Do you have anything in mind?" David asked.
"I was hoping one of you would," he said. "Given your royal experience."
David scoffed at that. "I hardly think you could count me as a royal. Even if I was, I want and value your opinion as well." He looked at her. "You're friends with Prince Thomas, are you not? Maybe he can help us."
"I don't want to bring him any trouble," she said uncertainly. "I know he'd be willing to help me, but I don't know about his father. In any case, even though Regina has no legal power in Serilia, I don't doubt for a moment she would retaliate if she found out that they were helping us. I don't want to bring any trouble on anyone if I can help it."
David nodded. "I've thought about asking Abigail, but I hesitate for the same reasons."
"We cannot do this on our own," Lancelot cautioned. "We need help, and can't be ashamed to ask of it."
"It isn't pride that holds us back," Snow said, "It's fear of what Regina will do if she finds out."
"Then what other options do we have?"
"Why can't we just find somewhere to stay that is out in the middle of nowhere?" Snow asked.
"To what end?"
"There is no end, Lancelot."
"Why don't you try to take the kingdom back?"
"Lancelot," David said warily. "Now isn't the time to talk about that."
"If I was ever in any sort of position to take it back, it won't be any time soon. Regina is too strong and I don't know how to go up against her. Right now, we just need to get somewhere where no one will find us. Then, maybe then, we can worry about that. But Lancelot, the odds are all against us. Regina has magic, and we don't. I don't even have an army. Regina singlehandedly managed to overthrow the kingdom in one night. How do you expect me to do it?"
"All I know is that you can't give up."
"Look at me! I am nothing," she stood up, temper rising. "Nothing, and no one. I don't want to hear anything more about me taking the kingdom back. My kingdom is gone, and in the hands of another. Until I have some sort of leverage against her, this discussion is closed," she snapped.
"Then what do you propose?" he asked, mouth firm.
"I don't know," she said, sitting down again.
David sighed. "Like you said, we can just find somewhere in the middle of nowhere to stay. There's no point in continuing all this travel if we don't have a destination in mind."
"In this realm?"
"I don't see why not. What do you think, Snow?"
She bit her lip, still slightly angry. "Unless you can think of a better place. I don't know."
"Lancelot?"
"I have no objections. But I think first we should cross the mountain pass."
David nodded slowly, thinking, but Snow didn't say anything. Lancelot was right; crossing the mountain first would be best. The further they were from Regina, the better off they would be, and she knew that barrier would greatly lessen the likelihood that they would be found, but she was tired of going. They had only spent a few months on the trail, but she was already weary. So much had happened since they'd been on their own, and now they were going to have to go up a mountain. But at least now, they had a destination.
"Snow?" David asked.
"Very well," she said softly. She didn't want to do it, but she held on to the knowledge that they were nearly done.
This was a bit of a slowish chapter, but I think you'll like the next one. Thanks for reading everyone, and lots of love!