Chapter 36: Love and Heartbreak

Sorry for the delay! I was busy and this chapter took me a long time, I had to make sure certain things were perfect.

I know I promised action but this chapter had to be written...first - its coming I promise!

Also I tried to incorporate two of my favourite songs into this chapter and the next, I thought they fit perfectly. I know a lot of people do it, I just wanted to give it a try myself. Bella's song for Edward in this story are her own words but in real life it is actually called "If I Didn't Have You" by Amanda Marshall (DL it kind of rules.)

Thanks for reading guys!

ANNNND Seriously Thank you so much - I dedicate this chapter to you Fo.2013

Edward:

Bella said yes.

Bella said she would marry me.

There was never a person on the planet as happy, euphoric and excited as I was right now. In the history of the Earth there had never been a person more thrilled with their life, not the cavemen discovering fire, not the invention of the telephone, colour TV, or automobiles. No one. EVER. Well except for maybe Bella, she has the exact same goofy grin on that I do. It was impossible to stop smiling.

I was so incredibly nervous when I was waiting outside the house. I listened to the finishing conversation between her Alice and Rose, glad that they managed to not ruin the surprise. When Bella exited the house and stood on the front porch my nerves calmed, I knew I was going to spend the rest of my life with her no matter what - I just preferred we we did it married.

She was stunningly beautiful. She always was, but tonight was special and Bella looked perfectly special. Her hair was more done up than I have ever seen and I enjoyed the change. I loved when Bella's hair curled, and cupped her face but the parts that were straight only proved helpful, accenting the auburn and golden hues in her curls. Dark jeans bringing out her pale skin and deep purple accenting her golden eyes. The heels were a very nice touch, accenting her thin legs and she almost looked extremely confident - I chalked that up to the fact that she could now walk in the heels without nosediving.

The entire day was special, well after the morning anyways. After Bella left that morning Jasper and Emmett went to do some detective work on the deaths in town. There had still been no key evidence that anything but an animal had committed the crime. We were still concerned, should it be an animal we could hunt it down and dispose of it for the town, but there was a chance it was werewolf or even vampire. The bodies had been ripped and shredded, no bite marks merely claws, and an extremely large amount of blood was always at the crime scenes. This made us believe it was not a vampire, how could they resist such a strong pull? When they got to the scene they couldn't even smell anything, no vampire scents, no wolf scents, nothing but bleach. Each crime scene was public and had to be cleaned up as soon as possible.

While they were gone I spent the morning with Alice. We had gone for a quick walk putting the final touches on my plan. She was a huge help. Alice kept tabs on Bella throughout the day, watching for visions and calling her to make sure she wouldn't be surprising us. Alice and Rose picked out my clothes for me after watching me struggle in the decision. They of course waited until I had put everything I own on... twice, making me even more nervous when I couldn't decide and commenting that I should just go naked - "Bella would definitely enjoy that." Rose had joked. I took her seriously and that only made her laugh harder. Finally, after tormenting me a bit, they stepped up and made the choice for me. I was so grateful, I promised them both diamond earrings.

The boys returned and it was time to tell the family the news. "I'm going to ask Bella to marry me." I told them all excitement dripping from my words. Shaking just a little. Alice had kept it a secret to everyone but Rose. Esme knew it was on my mind hearing from Alice that there was indeed a wedding in the future, but she didn't know how soon, it could be years away. She knocked me to the ground in her enthusiastic hug. Carlisle shook my hand and said that he'd love Bella to become a Cullen officially and when Emmett heard his words he made a sex joke playing on those words, twisting them for his sick ends. Jasper and Rose made him pay for his comment forcing him to the ground and making him eat an apple we had in the fridge. They were all extremely happy for me and wished me luck. Esme, Alice and Rose went to the meadow and placed the candles and the boys took me out for a 'pre-game meal'.

Everyone was giving me tips on what to do or how to act.

Emmett: "Don't go down on one knee it's too old fashioned."

Alice: "Go on one knee - you are old fashioned."

Emmett: "Kiss her to soften her up first."

Jasper: "Speak with your heart. It's all right there. I can feel it, you'll find the words."

Rose: "Buy her another car if she says no, then buy her another one and another one until she says yes."

Carlisle: "Relax."

Emmett: "Bring a blanket in case you need to..lie down...you know show her your commitment." (Emmett and his sex comments were starting to bother me.)

Esme: "Make her feel special."

I decided to go with the ideas that weren't ridiculous and I was so glad I did. I apologized as an opening, I felt compelled to do it, to make her understand that I would never make the mistake again. I wouldn't doubt us, I wanted to show her the level of commitment we had. It worked, Bella has said yes to me and only hesitated slightly thinking of her parents marriage. She amazed me further when she showed me her mind processing the request. She thought of the family, Alice and Jasper, Esme and Carlisle even Emmett and Rose. All marriages that worked, all devoted and complete together. Our love was like that and even non-comparible. As strong as ever and tough as nails. It could never end. Neither would let it.

When we were celebrating our engagement we had gone a little too far physically. It was something we both wanted to wait for. As special as our engagement was that level of intimacy was to be saved, preserved for our wedding night when we would belong to each other in every sense. I wasn't entirely sure how long the both of us could wait though.

We reluctantly disengaged and began to head home. I refused to let Bella out of my grasp the entire way home. The distance was already too much and she was only an arms length away.

Returning home we slowed before crossing the river. "Edward." Bella breathed looking at our entwined hands.

"Yes love?" I said watching her examine our touching skin. "Are you looking for the electricity?" I quipped.

She laughed lightly, "No, it is weird though, feeling it with every touch but not being able to see it." I pulled her closer, her chest against mine.

"I can see it. I see it every time I see your smiling face, every time your eyes grab mine, every time you speak my name."

She looked up as if on que, "You're really sure about this marriage thing. Attached in every way for the rest of eternity, stuck with me at your side."

I palmed her face with my right hand, "Bella you are impossibly insecure. Of course I want to be beside you, until the end of time. Mrs. Bella Cullen." And I kissed her again, forceful, passionately, hands tangled in each other's hair, desire spilling out of us.

Finally she pulled away after her hands found my button to my shirt again. She locked eyes with me coyly, "If you are going to keep kissing me like that Edward Cullen, I am only going to keep losing control, I'm already bordering the edge of insanity with my...passion for you."

I laughed and gave her her favourite smile. "I apologize, shall we be five feet a part until our wedding night?" I asked.

"Not unless you don't want me to live until our wedding night."

I hugged her, "I feel the same way."

She sighed, "You nearly gave me a heart attack with that distance talk mister."

I laughed, "Like I have the strength to do it!"

We walked at a slow and leisurely pace the rest of the way home. It was probably killing Alice. I smiled, this was all thanks to her. Bella and I found each other thanks to Alice's meddling. Bella's life was no longer as dismal as she found it when she first moved here. She had a best friend now, sisters, married parents, brothers and a fiance. I knew it, Bella was definitely as happy as I was right now.

"You ready to be introduced as my fiance?" I asked her.

"How weird is this going to be?" she asked nervously, the smile still plastered on her face.

"I have no clue, Alice is in there though so I wouldn't be surprised if there were decorations."

"But everyone else, they are okay with this, we have only known each other for like 7 monthes."

I leaned down and kissed her cheek, tightening my grip on her hand, "Bella I waited for you for a hundred years...it was more than enough time. And as for everyone else, why don't you just turn that knob and find out?"

She nodded, kissed me on the lips and did as I suggested.

Bella:

The house shook with all the noise coming from it when I opened the door. Sure enough there were gold and blue streamers hanging throughout the house, everyone had a party hat on and a noise maker in their mouths.

Esme was the first to greet us, "Congratulations!!" She blew on her noise maker before taking it out and pulling us both into a huge hug. "I am so happy for you two!" Her excitement rivaled my own.

Carlisle was next with congratulations, he shook hands with Edward and hugged me. "You'll have a wonderful wedding Bella, we'll be sure of that."

My attempts to tell him I didn't need a lavish wedding were quieted and cut off by Rose. She nudged Edward playfully in the ribs and kissed me on the lips quickly before crushing me against her. "I'm beyond thrilled that you said yes. I cannot wait until you marry this loser and become my sister officially....And you look fantastic by the way, this excitement has put a faint blush to your cheeks, you're glowing Bella."

"Thanks a lot Rose, for all your help." I turned to look at everyone in the room, "Seriously, thank you, it was a wonderful surprise and perfect night."

Jasper hugged me, joked with Edward about running away with me, and went back to his video game with Emmett. Emmett yelled his compliments, told me I looked hot, and asked if we 'got busy' in the meadow. Instead of being embarrassed I merely rolled my eyes, he had been making a lot of sexual innuendo's lately, I was getting used to it. As embarrassed as I was I knew Edward was just as uncomfortable and that soothed me a little. We were in this together. His response was not as calm as he then proceded to wrestle with Emmett until Esme told them to stop or take it outside.

They began to play halo as I searched the room. I had not seen her yet since I left, I would have thought she would be one of the first one's to jump on us. I walked further into the living room, Rose came with me. She pulled me to the couch. "So have you given any thought to what your dress will look like?" Rose asked me.

"Um, white?" I said distracted. My head was whirling, worried, where was Alice? I craned my neck to search the room, I was having a very hard time looking through the three male vampires jumping around while they were playing Halo.

"No silly, off the shoulder, backless, strapless? Hoop skirt, short skirt, floor length?"

I sighed, I was having no luck catching a glimpse of Alice, and these questions were not helping me. "Um, I don't know, it should be white. That's about as far as my thinking has gone, Rose. Look we have plenty of time to discuss the plans, let's just enjoy this party."

"Are you saying I get to plan the wedding!?" she asked me excitedly her hands landing on me.

I stopped looking for Alice, thinking, did I just ask Rose to plan my wedding to Edward? Her face was right close to mine, searching my eyes for the answer. "Um, yes, I think I'd like you to do it." She pulled me into a fierce huh, "BUT, I get ultimate veto power on the final decisions! If something is not me I get to say no." I cautioned.

"Oh yes of course! Don't worry I know you, this will be totally you and Edward!" She said hopping from my side and upstairs. I assumed she was going to get started. I rolled my eyes, she was becoming more and more like Alice everyday.

Esme came to sit at my side next. We watched the boys play their game for a little while before Edward was killed so many times he gave up. "Bella, would you accompany me somewhere, I have another surprise." he said holding out his hand.

"Another? Edward I have to warn you, after that one, I'm not sure any other surprise could top it." I said taking his hand.

He laughed, "Good. I'm glad, but I still have one more. I'm sure you're going to like it."

"Did you spend money?" I asked as he led me from the room, I quickly scanned it again...where was she?

He ignored my question. "Trust me okay."

"I do."

He was leading me towards his piano room. "Bella, I got you an engagement gift." He informed me kissing my wrist.

"No fair! I didn't know this was coming, I didn't get you anything!" I whined.

He chuckled softly and stepped into the room, as he stepped aside pulling me in he revealed two large black grande pianos. The one I expected, the second one however, blew me away.

"Edward." I breathed, this was so unexpected.

"Do you like it?"

I stepped closer to examine it pulling him with me. I ran my hand along its smooth lines. Walking around to the bench I pasued, studying the shape, texture, smell and location of the gift. It was across from Edward's, still on the raise platform facing the other. Excited I sat down, pulling Edward down beside me. He put his hand on the small of my back cupping my hip. The lid was open and I could see perfectly through to the other. If Edward was there I'd be able to watch him. I smiled widely.

"This is perfect. It's beautiful." I said.

"Good surprise?"

"Definitely, it's giving the proposal a run for it's money." I laughed joking with him.

He kissed my neck, then my cheek, I turned to face him. Smiling. "Thank you so much. This means the world to me." And it did. This was something we shared. I loved to play and I loved having him teach me. I knew how to play thanks to him. I was rubbish at everything I tried, never being good at anything but with him teaching me I began to do pretty well at it. With one look or touch, he was always giving me encouragement, motivating and inspiring me.

"I'm glad you like it Bella."

I shook my head, "No, I love it. I don't think you realize just how much this means to me. Edward I love to play the piano - something I never thought I would be able to do - not in a million years! And to actually be decent at it? Never."

I kissed him on the lips. Then I had an idea. I pulled back slightly to find his eyes that beautiful gold colour, deep and warm. "I do have a gift for you." I said smoothing out his collar and leaning forward to kiss his exposed neck quickly. I turned to face the keys again. His hand remained holding me close to him, hand on my hip. Secure. "Don't laugh, this is very rough. I only just finished it. Plus, I can't sing."

His eyes widened. "Bella...are you telling me you wrote me a song?"

I nodded slowly.

"In less than 4 days."

I nodded again.

His smile was huge now, it touched his eyes. He looked impressed, touched and excited. "Please, Bella please play for me. I would love to hear it and I'm positive your singing will be music to my ears. How could it not be, your voice sounds like singing even when you speak."

"No laughing." I told him.

"This is not a laughing matter."

I nodded. He'll see and then he'll have to bite his lips to prevent his laughs. I couldn't sing, I knew I couldn't, my mother told me all the time in the car to 'not quit my day job'. She found herself hilarious. I enjoyed singing, I loved to do it, even if I was no good I belted the tunes in the car. I knew I was no good, but I didn't care, with her I sang and sang and sang. She didn't judge me too much, usually she joined in. No one here had heard me sing before, I embarrassed myself daily in front of them, but this was different. Singing was something I did just for fun, if they laughed I would be self conscious about it forever...

"We won't laugh either!" I heard Rose call. Of course she knew why I was hesitating.

"Much!" Emmett added loudly, to which the response came a loud thwacking sound. Maybe a phonebook?

I rolled my eyes and smiled despite the situation. I was really nervous all of a sudden and Edward looked for damn excited, pleasantly waiting. I didn't want to disappoint him.

"Maybe we should wait. I should work on it some more."

"Bella." he said sternly. "Please play, I would love it even if it was one note, one word. The fact that you even wrote me a song means the world."

Then he did it. He dazzled me right out of my friggen mind. I felt my eyes glaze a bit as his breath hit me, I inhaled and swooned, his hand went from my hip slowly up my back, tingling the entire way. I leaned forward wanting to capture his lips, he leaned closer as well, an inch apart, "Play." he whispered, his cool breath entering my mouth.

Then he pulled back. I snapped out of it pouting. I leaned forward again. I wanted my kiss.

"Not until you play."

My mouth fell open. He was holding his lips hostage! Well I had to save them from himself. I turned my head back to the piano. "Okay." I took a deep breath.

I played the intro, hands gliding over the keys. I knew the notes, I let go of my inhibitions reveling in the fact this this was my piano and I was playing for him. I would play here everyday with Edward.

I began to sing his song, my voice quiet but sure, the world began to melt away for us,

I don't know what I was thinking

'Til I was thinking of you

I don't remember a thing before I opened my eyes

And you came into view

I don't know what I was doing

When there was nothing to do

Must've been waiting for someone, baby

Now I can see - I was waiting for you

I'd give up my sight just to see you

I'd beg, I would borrow and steal

I'd cut off my hands just to touch you

And tear out my heart so you'd know how I feel

There's nowhere that I wouldn't follow

There's nothing that I wouldn't do

'Cause I wouldn't wanna be me

If I didn't have you

Driving myself to distraction

Until you got in my way

I was just whistling Dixie 'til you struck up the band

And they started to play

I don't know how I was living

Until you came in my life

I always knew there was something wrong

Then you came along

Baby, you made it right

I'd give up my sight just to see you

I'd beg, I would borrow and steal

I'd cut off my hands just to touch you

And tear out my heart so you'd know how I feel

There's nowhere that I wouldn't follow

There's nothing that I wouldn't do

'Cause I wouldn't wanna be me

If I didn't have you

I was alone in the silence

'Til I was hearing your voice

I couldn't see my way clear until you parted the clouds

And you gave me a choice

I couldn't pick up the pieces

'Til I was falling apart

I didn't know I was bleeding

'Til your love fixed this hole, baby, here in my heart

I'd give up my sight just to see you

I'd beg, I would borrow and steal

I'd cut off my hands just to touch you

And tear out my heart so you'd know how I feel

There's nowhere that I wouldn't follow

There's no place that I'd rather be

This life without you would be hollow

This love is a gift, and you gave it to me

All that I am, you have made me

And baby, I know that it's true

I'd give it all up in a heartbeat

Just to spend every moment with you

There's no place that I wouldn't follow

There's nothing that I wouldn't do

'Cause I wouldn't wanna be me

If I didn't have you

I played the ending, every last key - just for him.

Right here in this moment I realized that that song really was me and every word was for him.

I turned to face him. He was staring at me. Eyes smoldering, mouth slightly open, hand on my hip. When he didn't say anything I started to panic. He hated it. I scared him off. Too much devotion maybe? Of course there was too much bloody emotion, you were bound to f*ck this up eventually! I turned back to look at the piano, this was it, the end to our story. I had screwed it up all with a song. Your terrible singing. Nail in the coffin...

"Edward," I whispered, "Please say something." I had to hear it, he had to tell me how bad it was. He still had nothing to say, I turned to face him again. I lifted my leg over the bench straddling it. He continued to stare at my face, following my movement with his eyes, but body never moving. I had to touch him, make sure he was still in there somewhere. I reach up and cupped his cheek, "Edward, what's wrong? Did you hate it? You can tell me."

He blinked a couple of times at the touch and the words from my mouth. His mouth still hanging open slightly he turned his head to the side like a puppy that didn't understand. He looked stunned.

His next move shocked me, it would continue to shock me until the end of time, I was sure. Out of nowhere his hands slid up my thighs, tightening their grip and lifting me, he pulled close, slipping in between my legs and standing up, he pushed against the piano and my butt crashed on the keys. A long resonating sound was emitted from the movement and I didn't have time to comment on it, my lips were busy. My head swooned Edward's tongue entered my mouth, he kept pushing up against me, hand roaming, fingers blazing a heated trail in their wake. As shocked as I originally was now I was into it, my hands found his body, curiously traveling and locking around his neck and in his bronze hair. The piano kept emitting sounds with every movement we made, keys were hit and I realized this was the most beautiful sound I would ever hear. A beautiful mess of notes. Describing our sexual frustration, need and want for each other. Our love confusing and rushed, forceful and passionate. Loud and unruly.

His lips disengaged from my mouth and moved to my neck, licking and nipping, teeth grazing across my marble skin.

My mouth free and my mind coming back to me I laughed, "Does that mean you liked it?"

"Mmm" his response against my skin leaving a wonderful sensation in the pit of my stomach. I had to stop him. I grabbed at his neck trying to push him back.

Finally using all of my force I got him to stop nibbling my neck, he looked at me curiously.

"Remember what I said before?"

He smiled remembering my comments about pushing me too far. He nearly had me ripping his clothes off then and there. With his parents and sisters a room away! I shouted at myself inwardly realizing just how far he almost pushed me over the edge. I would never live that down. Emmett would torture me every single day. I leaned my head on Edward's chest. My favourite pillow.

"Bella, that was amazing. Thank you." He said quietly, just for me.

"You liked it? You're not just saying that?"

He kissed my head still with me entangled around him, "Every part. I loved it. Bella I have never heard something so truthful, every word was our relationship. Every word was me to you and you to me. You have a gift sweetheart."

"The inspiration was there." I said aloofly, thrilled at his words. He caught my meaning in them and reciprocated the sentiments. "Best gift ever?" I asked.

He smiled against my hair, "Best Gift Ever." he agreed.

"Bella that was beautiful. You have a wonderful voice." Esme's voice drifted from the doorway.

Too comfortable I didn't even bother releasing from the compromising position he and I were in, I merely turned my head, "Thank you Esme." She liked my singing. Now that I thought about it, my voice did sound kind of good with the music, it didn't sound near as frail and weak as when I was human. I can sing now. Sweet. I might just have to do this more often...especially at the response I get from Edward.

She was beaming at us, not offended at our position at all, no she seemed thankful, glad and she kind of looked like she was admiring it. She thought we were bewitching together.

"Come on you two," she finally said, "Carlisle would like to toast you."

Edward lifted me up and place me on my feet. "I love you Bella." he told me.

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah I kind of like you too." I joked as I led him into the living room....

Arriving in the living room, everyone was in their positions smiling at us. At this point I didn't care that they heard me singing, Edward liked it, that's all that mattered.

"Who knew that you could sing?" Emmett commented.

I was smiling stupidly, not bothering to get embarrassed, Edward head me firm at his side now, his hand on my hip, his other twirling in my hair.

"Don't listen to him Bella, it was excellent. You really do have a talent." Rose complimented me. Everyone agreed as my eyes roamed the room.

"Alice." I breathed. I found her leaning against the threshold between the kitchen and the living room. I realized why I hadn't seen her earlier, if she had been there the entire time, every position I had been in was blocked by Esme's huge plant thing that took up half the room.

"Congratulations Bella, Edward." She said nodding and remaining against the wall. Her face masked. No excitement was there like I expected, no joy, nothing actually. I wondered what was wrong, concern filled me. I left Edward's side and headed over to her, before I could get there though Carlisle entered sliding passed her and forcing me back to Edward. He had a tray in his hand with crystal wine glasses. At first I thought they were filled with wine and then I realized they were filled with blood. Not a lot, just about two gulps full.

He and Esme handed out the glasses, a disgusting scent entered my nose and I grimaced before I realized what this was. "Human blood!?" I asked nervously.

"It's just the end of Carlisle's stockpile when you had first come here." Edward calmed me, "O negative, small enough amount that our eyes will not remain reddened and no frenzy will start. It's okay, pull down you barrier."

"Yes Bella, we are celebrating, and as no one died for this blood we can indulge." Carlisle added.

I lowered my shield. A wonderful bouqet of scents filled me, the blood was warm, thick and smelled delicious. Like raspberries and steak. It was an odd combination but wonderful.

Our heads turned to face Carlisle, I noticed Alice had still not moved from her spot. She had a glass though and appeared like she was going to join in on the toast. Still no usual spark of life on her tiny face. "We raise a glass tonight, to Edward and Bella. A romance for the ages. An unlikely pairing and a love leaps and bounds above loves that exist in this lifetime. To a love that has proved that even after death it can continue. Love is enough kids. Congratulations!"

Everyone raised there glasses and drank deeply. I thanked them and noticed Alice only sipped hers. I squeezed Edward's hand, and pulled him from the room. I stood on my tippy-toes to reach his ear, "What's wrong with Alice?" I whispered so only he would hear.

"I don't know. She is blocking me out with a Lonestar song."

"Can you do me a favour? Can you take everyone out hunting, I need to speak to Alice. I have to ask her something and find out if she's alright."

"Of course love." he wrapped me in a hug holding me close.

I put my head in the crook of his neck, "I'm sorry to do this on our engagement night, I would love nothing more but to spend the rest of tonight never leaving your sight until we have to go break it to Charlie....but I'm worried about her."

"I know, it's okay. You two have an adoration that I pity anyone who tries to get in the way of it." he said releasing me.

He kissed me before I led him back to the room, he squeezed my hand tightly before releasing it and I slowly crossed the room, weaving between the bodies over to Alice. She said nothing and only glanced at me.

Edward cleared his throat. "Everyone? I would like us to go out hunting as a family." Everyone cheered and began to head out behind him.

Alice made to move forward from her position, she took a step past me and I grabbed her hand to stop her, "Not us." I said.

A/N: Excitement begins next chapter, Im gonna grab some dinner and start working on it for you! Should be up late tonight or early tomorrow. This was supposed to be longer but I was switching to another POV so I thought it would be better if I split it. So some things got moved to the next chapter.