Chapter Thirty Seven:
He opened the door on the first knock.
"He uhm left his blanket...at the house," she whispered.
"Come in. Mary is upstairs with Scotty. She's trying to get him to sleep. Why don't you go upstairs and rock him. He's missed you."
Sara climbed the stairs.
She knew the way.
She simply followed Scotty's cries.
She stepped into the room and Mary smiled. "I'm glad to see you. He's missed you."
Scotty turned and stared at Sara.
He fussed but then extended his hands and cried for Sara.
Sara quickly took him.
She held him tightly against her chest.
"Momma," he wailed. He grabbed fists of her hair and clung to her.
"So sorry Scotty. I'm not sure I can do this," she whispered. "I'm not sure I could live with it…do that to myself and…Gil."
Scotty snuggled into her as she sat there in the rocker.
She covered him with the blanket she brought and held him until he slept.
Sara held him tight against her.
David stood at the door and watched.
"He needs you," he said. "He only responds to you…isn't that right, Mary?"
"Yes, he does. He loves you very much," said Mary.
"Mary, why don't you put Scott to bed? Sit with him in case he wakes. Sara and I have some personal business to work out. Scotty is going to be living with Sara and Mr. Grissom. I just need
to sign the papers."
Mary glanced at Sara.
"This is the best thing for him. He's happy with you," Mary said quickly.
"Mary, I want you to get Scotty's things together while we complete the paperwork. Sara will come and get him when we're finished."
Sara watched as Mary lifted Scotty from her arms.
She smiled at Sara.
Grissom's words echoed again and again in her head.
I'm your last…
Mates for life…
I love you Sara…
She felt David's hand on hers.
She stared at the touch.
She felt nothing as he guided her out of the room.
She stood there now in his bedroom.
She watched as he shut the door.
He was there suddenly in front of her.
"Just let me love you," he whispered.
David's hand caressed her cheek.
"So soft," he murmured as he leaned in to kiss her.
"Don't! Don't touch me! I uhm can't do this. I can't…please David…please…I can't do this," she sobbed. "Not even for Scotty. I can't…I can't…my marriage vows…I could never let anyone
touch me except Gil…please!"
He cursed. "You just rocked your son to sleep…you could do that every night…your son, Sara. Scotty could be yours…just…"
She shook her head.
"Please let me take him," she begged. "You don't want him. He's just a baby. He deserves someone who will love him and protect him…Gil and I will do that. Please."
His hand swiped a tear from her face and she trembled.
David pulled her into an embrace.
She panicked, pushing him away as she ran out of the room.
"Sara!"
She ran down the stairs and out the door.
She did not stop until she was at her car.
A hand grabbed her arm and she jerked away from it.
She whirled around to face Grissom.
"Gil?"
"Warrick said you were coming here…to see Scotty. What's wrong?"
She swallowed hard as she tried to catch her breath.
"Sara, what happened?" he yelled.
"I'm sorry," she said. "I don't know what I was doing."
She leaned against the car and began to cry.
His stomach knotted as he glanced at her appearance.
Don't jump to conclusions…
Don't think she would…
"Want to tell me what happened?" he said in a low voice.
"He uhm…David agreed to give us custody of Scotty if…I uhm came here and slept with him. He would sign over custody after we…he would allow us to adopt Scotty."
Grissom glanced at Sara and then the hotel.
Hurt and betrayal crossed his face.
"I didn't," she said quickly.
"You came here, knowing that he wanted to…you were going to let him…" He stood there and stared at Sara.
"I just wanted to…"
"Sell yourself!"
"No! I uhm…" she gulped. "I'm sorry."
"You came here knowing that he wanted you in his bed! What were you thinking?" he yelled.
"I wasn't…I wasn't thinking about anything but Scotty. Gil, I'm sorry…"
"How far were you willing to go Sara? How far did you go? Did you let him touch you? Did you think you could just give yourself to him, get Scotty and then slide back into our bed as if
nothing had ever happened?" He yelled.
"I didn't…I couldn't…"
She stepped toward Grissom but he stepped back.
She swallowed the tears that erupted.
"Gil…say something."
"I can't be with you right now," he said between clenched teeth.
"I uhm so sorry," she said.
He stood there and stared as the tears dropped one by one.
This is exactly what he wanted…
Drive a wedge between us…
Grissom's phone went off.
His hand went up in the air to indicate he was not finished talking with her but he cursed when she got into her car and drove away.
"Grissom."
"She's fine, Warrick."
He closed the phone and stared at the car as it sped away.
He glanced at the hotel building as he cursed.
go after her...
I'm too angry...
how could she?
He sat there in his vehicle and fumed.
His phone went off and he stared at the caller ID.
It was Sara.
It was the other Grissom.
He threw the phone into the floor board.
She told herself to breathe when he did not answer.
She knew he was not answering his phone on purpose.
"I can't be with you right now."
His words cut like a knife.
No Grissom…
No Scotty…
What have I done?
I deserve this…
I betrayed his trust…
I couldn't help Scotty…
She sat in her car in the parking lot.
She had purposely parked in the far corner in hopes no one would see her.
It was a mistake.
She jumped at the tap on the door.
"Hey Kiddo. Want to tell me what you're doing here?" asked Brass.
"I was just…"
"First fight huh?"
She said nothing.
"Mind if I sit with you?" he asked.
She unlocked the door and he slid into the front passenger seat.
"I was wondering how long it would be before he did something…"
"He didn't do anything," she said swiping at her eyes.
"It takes two to fight," he said.
"We uhm didn't fight," she said.
"Then why is a newlywed sitting in her car, in tears when she should be at home with her husband who I know for a fact left here about an hour ago?"
Sara said nothing.
"I haven't had dinner…let's get something," he said.
She shook her head.
"Going home?" he asked.
She said nothing.
"Okay. You didn't fight but yet you're avoiding him. What did you do?" he asked.
"I uhm hurt him," she whispered.
"I don't believe that," he said. "Besides, if you did, it was not intentional."
She again said nothing and he frowned.
His radio went off.
There was another 419.
"Just when we were getting to the bottom of this," he said. "I should make sure Catherine has this covered. I think she and Nick are still here."
Brass was surprised when he walked out of Catherine's office and ran into Sara. She did not look at Brass but turned toward Catherine.
"Need some help?" asked Sara to Catherine.
"You volunteering? Griss left here about an hour ago. Wouldn't you rather be at home with your new hubby?"
"Need the help or not?" asked Sara.
"I'm not going to turn down help," said Catherine. "Get your kit and let's go."
"Meet you in the parking lot," said Sara as she walked out.
Brass stared at Catherine.
"Do I detect the end of the honeymoon so soon?" asked Catherine.
"Keep an eye on her," said Brass. "She's not herself."
"Think we should call Grissom?" asked Catherine.
"Let him find out for himself. If my wife didn't show at home, I would be concerned. He should too," said Brass.
"You think he screwed up already?" asked Catherine.
"Not yet…but I have a feeling he's about to," said Brass in a low voice.
"Then don't you think we should…"
"He needs to do some crawling…Sara waited five years."
"I see you've already chosen sides," said Catherine.
He said nothing but walked away.
Catherine handed Sara some fibers and she put it in an evidence bag.
"So…I remember my first fight with Eddie…but then again Eddie and I fought a lot. You know the best part about fighting, is the makeup sex. It was always good."
Sara said nothing as she turned and began searching for evidence across the room.
"Did you plan to have Lindsey?" asked Sara quietly.
"Yes and no. I remember having a discussion about kids and the next thing I know I'm pregnant. The timing sucked but we got through it."
Catherine stopped working and looked at Sara.
"You're not…"
"No."
Sara continued to work but glanced back at Catherine.
"Would you do anything for Lindsey?"
"Yeah…I would. I'd kick anyone's ass that hurt my daughter…there's no limit to what you'd do for your child. I'd even kill if necessary."
Sara's eyes dropped to the floor.
"How's Scotty?" asked Catherine.
"He uhm…" Sara did not finish but continued working.
"Warrick told us that you were going to see him tonight. I made Gil leave early so he could meet up with you. He did, didn't he?"
Sara sat down in the floor.
"I should finish this," she said.
"Sara, are you alright?" asked Catherine.
"I'm uhm fine," she whispered.
Catherine glanced at her but quickly turned away when she saw that Sara was crying. She knew the last thing Sara would want was an audience to her melt down.
"I'll get the next room done," called Catherine.
They finished the crime scene and headed back to the office.
Sara checked in the evidence.
"Go home," said Catherine. "You look beat."
She was tired.
Sara never felt so tired before.
She headed toward her car and she stopped when she saw him standing there in front of it.
"Ready for something to eat now?" asked Brass.
She stared at him.
She didn't like her options.
"I can't be with you right now."
I can't go home…
I don't want to go to my apartment…
There's not much left in it…
Just boxes and a few things waiting for storage…
He doesn't want to be with me…
I don't want to be alone…
God, the nightmares will come…
I'll be alone…
"Diner," she said softly.
"Best food in town," he said.
They sat there waiting for their order.
She sipped on the glass of water while he stared at her.
Her phone went off and she jumped.
She glanced down and saw that it was Grissom.
Nine hours later and he calls…
Probably wondering why I'm not at work…
Didn't care that I never came home…
Didn't care…
She sipped on the water as she ignored the phone.
"Aren't you going to answer that?" he asked.
Note from author:
Hold off with the hate emails...LOL Take a deep breath and continue.
Take care,
Penny