Chapter 35
Planet Essowyn
Padmé had spent almost an hour in the twins' room where she and Threepio were packing Luke and Leia's belongings. She was running through her head all the loose ends she'd need to attend to before leaving; finding a new doctor on Gallinore, finding a new school or tutors for the twins, transferring all the important and sensitive information she had in her computer. She didn't hear Obi-Wan enter the room, and jumped when he said her name.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," Obi-Wan said as he sat down on the edge of Luke's bed.
"It's okay," Padmé replied. "I was kind of lost in thought."
"Understandably," Obi-Wan said. He watched her for a moment. "Need some help?"
"Uh…no, not really," she said as she put the lid on another box. "We're almost finished in here."
Obi-Wan nodded. "I want to come with you, Padmé," he said finally.
Padmé looked up at him quickly.
"That is, if the offer is still open," he added.
Padmé smiled. "Yes, it most definitely is," she said. "I have to admit that I'm surprised," she told him.
Obi-Wan nodded. "I'm sure," he replied. "But I know in my heart that it's the right thing to do."
Padmé lifted her eyebrows. "Your heart?" she repeated. "Since when do the Jedi rely on their heart to make decisions?"
"Since your love brought Anakin back from the Dark Side," Obi-Wan replied. "I see now that we've been foolish to ignore the power of love, to try to inhibit the innate human need for love. Master Yoda, however, does not share my sentiment," he told her, casting his eyes downward. "He reminded me that it was my emotional attachment to Anakin that failed him," he added quietly.
Padmé frowned. "It was the Jedi's arrogant pride that failed Anakin," she stated. "You were like his brother, Obi-Wan. It's my hope that the two of you will be close again one day."
"Perhaps," Obi-Wan replied. "I really don't know what to expect, to tell you the truth," he told her. "He may be resentful," he added. "He may not want me staying with you."
"It was his idea," Padmé countered.
"It was?" Obi-Wan asked in surprise.
Padmé nodded. "I told him about what Yoda was saying, and he suggested I move to Gallinore with the twins and Beata," she told him. "And when I told him that you didn't agree with Yoda, he said that I ought to ask you to come along as well. He knows how you've been shielding us from the emperor; he's counting on you to continue doing so. So am I, Obi-Wan," she said. "We need your help."
Obi-Wan smiled, feeling brotherly feelings of protectiveness towards Padmé. "You'll have it," he told her. "For as long as you need or want it," he added.
"You mean you're willing to leave Yoda?" she asked. "Leave him here alone?"
"He's made his choices, and so must I," Obi-Wan replied. "Besides, he's more than capable of taking care of himself."
"Yes, I suppose he is," Padmé agreed. "Well in that case, you'd better get your things together," she told him. "I want to leave in the morning."
Obi-Wan stood up. "That won't take long," he quipped. "Let me know if there's anything I can to do help you, Padmé," he said.
"I will," she replied. "Thank you Obi-Wan. You're a good friend."
Obi-Wan smiled, and then left the room. He was astonished that Anakin had suggested that he live with Padmé and the twins; and it gave him hope that perhaps there was a chance that they could reconcile. He had never been able to forget what had happened on Mustafar; had never forgiven himself for leaving his one time best friend in agony. He'd devoted his life to protecting Anakin's family, and would continue to do so as long as he was needed.
Star Destroyer Exactor
Anakin went about his duties on board the Exactor, maintaining his command and demeanour as always. The officers and men could have no idea of the metamorphosis that had taken place within their commander; for to them the fearsome mask remained as ominous as ever. Behind the mask, however, Anakin was finding it more difficult each day to tolerate the claustrophobic hell he'd endured for the past four years. He had learned to draw upon the Dark side to deal with the pain, the discomfort and isolation; and it had served him well. But now that he had turned away from the Dark side, he was finding it a massive struggle not to lose his mind.
The men he commanded had noted that Lord Vader was far more impatient than usual, far more restless; but they thought nothing of it, for they were certainly used to his volatile mood swings. The fact that he spent more time than ever in his hyperbaric chamber was welcome to them, for it meant a little breathing room on the bridge without the fearsome Dark Lord watching their every move.
For Anakin, his hyperbaric chamber had become a refuge, the only place where he could feel remotely normal. He had become obsessive about checking his messages, hoping that there would be word from Vih'Torr, telling him that they were ready for the surgery. But there had been no word yet, and he knew that he had to be patient. I'll see Padmé and the children soon, he kept telling himself as he went through the motions of his weekly inspections; only a few more days and we'll be together.
"Lord Vader," Captain Ozzel said as Anakin stepped onto the bridge. "The emperor has sent priority orders, sir. We're to report to Kamino at once."
"Why? Is there a problem there?" Anakin asked.
"He said that he would be contacting you with the details in a few days, sir," Ozzel replied. "For now we're merely to go there and await orders."
Anakin frowned, but bit his tongue. "Very well," he said. "Set a course for Kamino at once."
"Right away sir," Ozzel replied, giving a nod to the navigator.
Anakin stood in front of the huge bridge window, folding his arms over his chest. To the outside he looked like he often did, his body language not giving a hint to the conflict that raged within him. To all intents and purposes he looked like the dutiful servant of the emperor, simply following orders unquestioningly as he always had. No one could see the anguish in his eyes as he realized that he would not be seeing his family soon, that he would have to tell his pregnant wife that he didn't know when he would see her, that he would have to hear the disappointment in her voice when he told her so.
"We're ready to make the jump to hyperspace, sir," Lieutenant Piett reported.
Ozzel glanced at Anakin briefly, and then spoke up. "Engage," he said.
Anakin waited for the ship to enter the hyperspace vortex, and then left the bridge to contact Padmé with the bad news.
Essowyn
Luke and Leia were so excited about the move they were up very early the next morning. Padmé had to fight her way through the morning sickness in preparation of the long voyage, relying heavily on Beata to help her with the children. Threepio had spent most of the early morning hours loading the ship, relieved that he and his buddy Artoo Detoo would be accompanying their mistress on the voyage.
Obi-Wan knew that he needed to speak to Yoda before leaving with Padmé and her family; and he was dreading it. He had not second guessed himself; he had not changed his mind. And yet, he simply could not leave Yoda, perhaps forever, without saying goodbye. Obi-Wan found Yoda in his room, meditating. He didn't want to interrupt, but Yoda opened his eyes when he sensed Obi-Wan's presence.
"Come in, Obi-Wan," Yoda said. If he didn't know better, Obi-Wan would have thought he'd heard a touch of sadness in his tone.
"I'll be leaving within the hour," Obi-Wan began. "And wanted to say goodbye."
Yoda nodded, his calm demeanour unperturbed. "A safe journey I wish you," he said.
"Thank you," Obi-Wan said. For the first time in the forty years that he'd known Yoda, Obi-Wan felt awkward with him. He deeply regretted that things had come to this; but perhaps this was the will of the Force. Obi-Wan had never questioned it before, and wasn't about to start now.
"Will you remain here?" Obi-Wan asked finally, unable to stand the silence any longer.
"Perhaps," Yoda replied. "Perhaps home I will go. Uncertain I am."
"I see," Obi-Wan replied. "You know Master, that I really do regret that things have ended up this way," he said. "But I don't feel that I have a choice."
"You must do what you feel is right, Obi-Wan," Yoda replied. "Just as I must. Our paths will cross again one day. I have foreseen it."
Obi-wan smiled. "Well then, I suppose it's not goodbye but…until we meet again," he said.
Yoda nodded slowly. "May the Force be with you, Obi-Wan Kenobi."
"And with you too, Master Yoda," Obi-Wan replied. Surprised that Yoda had not tried to talk him out of his decision, Obi-Wan left Yoda, prepared to follow whither the Force lead him.
Padmé stood in her bedroom, looking around the room for the last time for stray items that had escaped Threepio. It looked quite bare, and she decided that he hadn't missed anything. She thought back to the last four years, to the countless nights she'd cried herself to sleep in this room, to the many nightmares she'd had about Mustafar, and the just as numerous dreams she'd had of the wonderful times she'd shared with Anakin. But she also remembered having her babies in the room with her, waking up to nurse them in the night, cuddling with them in the large bed, and waking to their smiling faces each morning. Bittersweet were her memories of this place, just as the past four years had been. Today marked an end to that life, and the start of a new one; one that she hoped would include Anakin very soon.
Padmé was just about to leave the room when her comlink sounded. Activating the device, she sat down on the edge of the bed. It was Anakin.
"Hi," she said. "We're all set and are about to leave," she told him.
"Good," he replied. "Is Kenobi accompanying you?" he asked.
"Yes he is," she replied. "Will you be there when we arrive?"
"No, unfortunately not," he told her. "I have been unavoidably delayed."
"Oh," was Padmé's reply. He could hear the disappointment in her voice. "How long?"
"I can't say," he replied . "Hopefully only a few days, but it could be longer. I'm sorry, Padmé."
Padmé sighed. "It's not your fault," she replied. "You have to keep up appearances, after all. I understand that."
Of course you do, Anakin reflected; you're utter perfection. "Contact me when you arrive," he told her.
"I will," she replied. "I hope to see you soon."
"Yes, so do I," Anakin replied. "I love you. Have a safe voyage."
"I love you too," she replied. She then ended the transmission, and stood up. Swallowing the lump in her throat, Padmé left the room for the last time, determined not to look back.