Disclaimer: I don't Own Death Note. Good talk.
Chapter Thirty-six What is a Salad?
A gentle hand was slowly running through my hair. Someone was nearby, in my room. I took a deep breath, of course there was. There's been someone there for the past few years. I relaxed with a small sigh, not even bothering opening my eyes. A heart beat was heard under my ear, I was lying on some one. A few years ago I would've freaked out, and I did multiple times. One would think over time this would've stopped, but it didn't. Over the years I have retrained myself, this was nice.
A small kiss was laid on the crown of my head. I smiled and finally opened my eyes and looked up at my person-pillow. A small giggle escaped my lips as another gentle kiss was placed on my forehead. He rested his head on mine. I nestled into his neck and whispered good morning, pausing unsure if it was still morning. When did I even go to sleep anyways? This was unlike me, sleeping two days in a row.
He chuckled lightly and hugged me slightly tighter, me just then realizing that he had been hugging me the entire time after he had finished brushing my hair. "Yeah, its morning, surprisingly," Matt whispered gently. I returned his statement with a slow thoughtful hum. It was surprising it was still morning, it's normally at least two in the afternoon when I wake up. Even then I shuffle around the rest of the day not being productive. I actually felt like doing things today, so that's always a plus.
I returned the hug and smiled. I liked waking up like this, it reminded the very important concept that I was human. I almost forget that sometimes, normally around day 5 without much sleep. Matt, even though neither one of us likes to admit it, had effectively taken Watari's role. It didn't surprise me too much, someone had to step up to that role, why not him? He made sure that eventually I get some sleep, whether it is a nap or laying down to actually sleep. That made a big deal.
I know from my lack of record of the past four years makes it seem like I haven't done anything, but that's because everything I did resulted in failure. Light had the power; he was now L in the eyes of the world. He took my title away from me. No matter what he did, he covered up his tracks even better than before. He was teasing me if anything. Making a showy death with subliminal messages to me telling me to give up, trying to intimidate me. I, in turn, would use the internet to send my "there's not a chance in hell you're getting away with this" message. It was really a vicious and pointless cycle.
"Matt…" I started trailing off, "we should probably get downstairs." He hummed in agreement, but made no move to let go of me. I lifted my head and smiled as I kissed him. "We need to get the SPK to trust me when I say I worked with L. I am about to do some pretty illegal shit, and having them behind my back is essential." I kissed Matt again after he chuckled slightly.
"It's bad enough I've wasted time sleeping," I said as I got out of bed and pulled my hair into a lose ponytail, not caring about showering. I walked to our suitcases and took out a pair of jeans, a half-sleeved t-shirt and put them on looking for my boots.
"No, you needed the sleep. You're eye bags aren't going to just get up and walk away." I looked up from the floor and smirked. He was right, but this case wasn't going to get solved while I take a trip to dreamland for the sake of getting these circles removed. They've grown on me anyways. I think I'd look weird without them now.
"They could. Ah-hah!" I said as I found my boots. I pulled a pair of socks from the pile of clothes in my suitcase and put them on with my boots, tucking the jeans inside the boot. "Now for the espresso!" I jumped up and frowned, too early for energy.
I heard Matt chuckled once again as I walked into the kitchen and made some strong ass coffee. The chances of someone pulling me aside for an interrogation were about 87%. I wanted to be ready to "baffle them with bullshit." That was the plan anyways. If this went where I thought it was going to with Linder leading the questions, there was not going to be any bullshit. I watched as what looked like to be pure caffeine drip into the cup.
"So what's your plan exactly?" Matt asked as he walked in handing me my flashdive that was on the same chain as the key to the old building L had built, the other necklace that Mello had given me with the white king chess piece from Near, and the goggles he had given me. I hadn't gone a day without wearing them though all these years. I put the two necklaces on and put the goggles on the crown of my head, my bangs falling into my left eye.
"Well, I am going to drink a lot of caffeine, and then…yeah see where that takes me. I am probably gonna be thrown into an interrogation room because Rester, Gevanni and Lidner aren't too happy about my decision to be so secretive. Planning on going all W.C. Fields on 'em." I pulled the espresso from the machine and chugged it down. Shaking my head from the bitterness of the drink, I normally make the black drink a nice cream color, but desperate times call for desperate measures I guess.
I walked out of the apartment like space and got into the elevator, Matt following close by. I crossed my arms and leaned against the back. This was going to be a long day. My only hope was that I could bring up the files that I sent to Near. The only problem was, I knew all the files like the back of my hand, but I didn't know if these guys had read them, or if anyone really paid attention to them for that matter, so resorting to those didn't sound like a good option. It was really the only one I had at the moment.
My stomach rumbled through the small space. "I knew I was forgetting something!" I yelled in the elevator. Matt looked at me like I was crazy. Well, he probably already knew that, but still the look was there. His eyebrow raised as he tilted his head in thought.
"Eb, you know every detail about this case down to the punctuation marks, and you forget normal things like eating. How does this make sense?" He asked. I shrugged as the doors opened. "You're incredible. L's chosen successor everyone!" I elbowed him as we walked into the conference room.
Once again all work stopped the second the doors opened. All worked stopped, people stared at the two of us and did their best to cover up the files they had lying around. I walked in and crossed my arms, looking into the corner of the room avoiding everyone's gaze. I rubbed under my nose with my index finger and sighed before lifting my head. "Alright, I know you guys don't trust me, I get it. I have a notebook and proved that I can easily beat Near at chess," I gestured as I talked, "but we're going to get nowhere if you continue to look into me, it's a waste of time. Near, choose some people and I'll be in an interrogation room. Someone bring me some food too, I'm starving."
I spun on my heel and walked down a hallway, leaving Matt behind. My shoes clicked against the floor as I lifted my head gravely and turned back slightly. I inwardly cursed, I should've requested that he be on the other side of the one-way mirror. Oh well, I am sure Near will be invited to look, and Near will invite Matt, or he should. That's typically how these things worked.
I came to a room with the "interrogation" plaque next to it and I opened the door. I paused, they didn't spare any expense I see. There was only one light, right in the middle of a metal desk, the chairs looked old, and were wooden. If I was right, the wood also looked like it was aged, like if I leaned back too far the legs would snap under me. I guess if I could make a comparison here it would be described as one of those interrogation rooms in bad cop-dramas where the entire room is pitch black minus the desk, like it belongs to some run-down town. That is this interrogation room, and I liked it.
I sat down in the chair and kicked my feet waiting for the first person to come to ask me questions. If I had to guess, Linder was going to pull every card she could to get into those doors before anyone else. That didn't really bug me or anything, she was a nice girl. That had me worried was, just the fact that she was so opinionated, like Mello. Unlike him, I didn't know how to crack her shell and that only annoyed me. I mean I could mess around and use the time we had together in this nice room to get close to her, know what buttons to push to get which reaction and so forth.
The door swung open quickly. The heady door slamming shut from its own weight making the walls shake. For a shady interrogation room, it sure was built to withstand a beating. Smart design really, the one getting interrogated would feel like it would be easy to get out of here, but the structure of the room was a lot tougher than what it seemed. I wouldn't be surprised if the table and chairs were reinforced. I looked up and smirked, and that was quickly gone after a clear plastic bowl was slid in front of me. I lifted it up and then looked at the person who gave it to me, my brow together in complete and utter confusion. "What is this?"
"It's a salad," Linder replied as she sat down opposite of me. She was sitting up straight, her hands folded neatly on the table, suggesting that she was open, but on closer observation I say just how close to the edge her hands were, ready to pounce and grab her gun. "Now my first question is, why can't you tell us –"
"I know it's a salad," I responded cutting her off midsentence, "but since when are salads food? It doesn't look tasty. I'm not a rabbit Linder, and I refuse to be treated as such!" I sat up and put my hands on my hips as she looked at me like she couldn't believe I was even human. She even had the disbelieving eye twitch down. It's been a while since I've seen it, it was actually quite refreshing.
"Ebony, this is people food. Just add the dressing to it, it'll be less bland." She rolled her eyes as I actually read the packaging and opened it. I sat back slightly as I saw that there was actually meat in it. What is this? Since when do rabbits eat meat? I was pretty sure they were on a strict herbivorous diet. "You're hopeless." She took the salad from me, dumped the meat and dressing into the salad and mixed it together.
"You're a wizard," I remarked in awe as she slid it in front of me. I took a bite and pushed it away in disgust. It wasn't sweet at all. It was leafy, and the only taste was from the dressing which was weird tasting. And that is my ignoring the weird tree-like flavor from the leaves. I mean, who eats this? "Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! What is this?"
"A salad," was all she replied with clearly fed up with me. I mouthed her words in a mocking fashion before crossing my arms, copying her stance.
"It's gross." I frowned as my stomach growled. I groaned and stabbed the salad venomously as I listened to my stomach's request. "I am only eating this because I am calling the mothership with my stomach."
"Back to my question," she started her voice still slightly edgy, "why won't you tell us who is Kira? We can catch him quicker if you did." I stopped eating and slowly lowered the plastic fork and chewed the bite I had in my mouth, taking a deep breath as I did so.
"You want to know why? Alright," I started as I leaned back, looking at the one way mirror and crossed my arms. "I am not telling you the key element on this case because I have interacted with Kira. I know how he works, who he is, and it's too dangerous. If he knows that I am working with you guys, he will have his guard up, and when that happens people die.
"L announced his involvement with the police, the police got involved with L, four months later Ukita dies. L himself, hell bent on stopping Kira dies himself November 5th of that very year. I almost died too, but it was sheer luck, nothing more, nothing less, that saved me. Kira is manipulative, cunning, he has everything working for him. We have shit working for us. Majority of the world is against us, not to mention that eventually someone besides me is going to sit down and crunch the numbers and see what Kira has done for the world.
"Also, the reason I haven't acted, and am so against action right now is because he has resources we simply don't have. Showing my face one time, being associated with me and showing your face, it will end in death. Like I said before Linder, no more death. We are going to stop Kira, and we are going to be sensible and we're going to cut down on the tragedies that effect us. This will raise our moral to fight. Should we lose a friend, a comrade, then we will be in a slump, our work ethic will drop in efficiency. I know this is horrible for me to say, but it's been 6 years, what's a little more time? A little more time to be used to plan out a sensible action that will cut down on the hits on our lives. Human self-preservation. End. Of. Story." I looked at her my head bowed grimly.
I couldn't handle another death, even though I just met all of these guys, I recognized the fire in their eyes, the want –no the need, to find and stop Kira no matter the cost, and as someone who knows how that ends up, I was forced to have to be the voice of reason, and I wasn't too reasonable so this is probably going to blow up in my face. My only hope at this point, was to talk sense into someone here, so that that person will keep everyone else grounded. Not only will the others trust this individual more, but it will lift a big weight off of my shoulders. I wouldn't have to worry so much that these guys will become another name on a stupid list.
"I've lost so much on this one case. Three people doesn't seem like much, but when you've lost everything every loss you take is like a giant stab in the heart, and the person who stuck it that knife in there is sadistically twisting it. It is horrible." I shook my hand and sighed. "Look, if you are on the right track, or my investigation is wrapping up, and just needs to have everyone standing together working under whatever plan I end up going with, I will tell you everything I know. I promise. Until then we're basically working completely separate going toward a common goal. I am sure this isn't too unreasonable, or far-fetched. When our information do converge, it will be the end of Kira. I swear on my life, no matter how much time I may, or may not have left. "
The room was quiet for a while. Linder didn't say a thing. I sighed and locked my jaw, letting us sit in silence for a few minutes. I needed this of these words to sink in before I summed everything up, and this didn't sound very humane of me to say, but it was something that given my situation made my stance seem like the reasonable one. I was just trying to get some empathy on a subject that everyone knows about, but few have felt on the same level as me.
"Look, I know people are dying, I get it. But when you've literally had almost every person that has ever mattered to you ripped from your hands, a sacrifice like what I am making makes complete sense. It's not because I am selfish, it's because if anymore of these people die on me, I will follow them. I will go off the deep end, I will end up dead, and Kira will win. I will die a coward should that happen, and that is the one thing I refuse to do."
Her expression didn't falter from the emotionless mask that she tried to wear the minute she walked into the interrogation room. I sat back and shook my head, she' d probably never understand, she was another Aizawa, hardened to solve this case whatever the cost, as long as it was legal and moral. I had one more trick up my sleeve, but I really didn't want to use it.
The air was heavy as neither of us knew where to go next, I sat back and hugged my knees to my chest and exhaled loudly. Linder then stood up. I lifted my head my eyes widening as I saw the resolve in her eyes. Her face was hardened still, but it wasn't a stone mask to hide everything and looking for anything to use as a weapon against me. This was progress.
"One more question, do you have a plan?" I looked up at her, my hair falling over my eye. I blinked a few times and nodded once. "Will it work?" I paused and sighed in thought, there were too many "what if's" not to mention I had to get Mello to cooperate, not much of a problem but it was a pain to deal with that kid sometimes. I shrugged.
"There's too many things I can't predict right now," I explained calm, monotone. "I will say that there is a 65% chance that the current plan I have will work. This plan probably won't work, and I have a back-up and that one has an 80% chance of working, but it means that I will have to tell you everything, making everyone here a giant target, but by that time it probably won't matter. " She dipped her head down and opened the door and calmly walked out.
I exhaled and put the palms of my hands over my eyes waiting or the click of the door, the shaking of the walls.. It was delayed significantly, and there was a slight breeze felt on my arms, as if someone tossed something on the table. My ears perked up, trying to gather my surroundings this way, trying to pick up on any movement, or even their breathing. Light quiet footsteps, whoever it was, he was used to sneaking around by my guess.
Lowering my head, I uncovered my eyes and as the sights settled in, my chin lifted slightly. Rester sat opposite of me, with a bowl of black grapes and a glass of apple juice. My eyes narrowed at him as I reached over and grabbed some of the fruit, chewing it thoughtfully. This was a classic interrogation technique. It wasn't going to work; I wasn't that trusting, or very trusting at all to be completely honest.
He didn't say anything, he merely sat across the desk with his hands neatly clasped together in front of him. Bowing his head, he gestured toward the file. I felt my eyebrows twitch as I stuck a grape between my teeth as I wiped my damp hands on my jeans and followed his instructions.
My eyes widened as I once again leaned against the back of my chair with a slight shake of my head. I didn't give this one to Near did I? I mean, there had to be a reason for it, unless wait that made sense. I planned for this distrust, so I added this file in to help gain the trust, knowing that L's word would reign overall. I really should've gotten more sleep before I sent those files, that way I would've been smart enough to make a list, so I could remember four years down the road.
"I was rereading some of the files we had on the case, and that one was in there. I have analyzed it, and asked N his opinion on it, and we both agree on who the subject of this file is," Rester explained as my eyes hungrily read over the words. How did I forget this file? I mean, I did know this file like all the others at some point this much is obvious, but somehow over the past four years, what I remembered about this file had been completely wiped from my memories simply by natural memory degradation.
I pressed my lips together and flipped back to the front, nodding slowly in response to what Rester said. It was pretty obvious on who the subject of this file was, but what was written here, it was a little hard to read. Not because the language was hard to understand, but because the sentiment that was within the words was unexpected due to the character writing them.
As a personal record, I would like to dedicate a small portion of my record of this case on the people who are actually working on it. I don't really suspect much of these files, mostly this will be a piece that will be handed to my successor as a guide to exemplify what kind of people should and shouldn't be allowed on a case. Either way, it is a habit I have gotten into, and I see no reason as to why I should stop. I suppose the first person this record is going to be on is the one I have the most contact with. For privacy reasons, I will only refer to this person as "E."
Upon our first meeting, I suspected E to be one of those people who were going to quit fairly recently on this case. This wasn't going to be caused by difficulty, but simply because the case was only going to really have movement once a week and they are the type of individual to always seek entertainment and will do anything to obtain this thrill. As the months progressed, this wasn't the case, E seemed immensely dedicated in this case, understanding exactly what was at stake, handling everything as a mature individual despite them not being one them self. This impressed me significantly, especially considering beforehand they dedicated their time trying to abstain from gaining my attention.
E is irrational, childish, yet brilliant. The way they work is similar to me, yet different and abstract enough that they pick up pieces I have some difficulty fitting in. That being said, she has problems with other areas of the puzzle that I pick up. If I had to rate their intelligence, I'd put them near my equal, and that worried me as much as it pleased me when I first found this out.
I scoffed and turned the page, skimming it to make sure there wasn't anything I didn't already know on his analysis of me. Rester was watching me as I skimmed through other pages, L describing his frustration when I stole his cake, going off the deep end with the sugar, how I was pretty much useless in the Yotsuba Kira branch of the investigation, his frustration with my open defiance when I told Task Force about the trust funds he had, and how I cussed him out. He even copied down what I said, keeping the German in there, how nice of him.
As I flipped to the last page, my nostalgic smile eventually melted off of my face. Pretty much everything as it got closer to the end took a melancholic tone. As much as I hated reading those entries, they were the ones that held most of the relevant data and theories for this case simply because it was him getting ready to leave. I sighed and forced myself to read this page, remembering then that this was the last document I read before he died, it's why I wanted to talk to him.
As this will probably be the last time that I will have a chance to update this log, I suppose now if any will be a good time to put closing thoughts on E. Despite being irrational, childish, quick to act, E has proved to be not only a valuable member of the team, but someone I have been pleased to call a friend.
Their background has given them the tools on how to react to a person like me, and she treated me as an equal, someone hasn't attempted before. While E and I were in a mutual depression, their constant need of entertainment, and general light-hearted character helped made this period of the case bearable. No, their involvement made the depression caused on my failure, our failure, completely dissipate while we interacted.
I am proud to call E my successor, even though they might not accept the title, and I understand their choice, this is no life. I see now that I have deprived myself from human interaction, the innocent things of life I haven't been acquainted with, I suppose it's too late. I hope this case doesn't consume E more than it already has, they are young, they deserve to live without fear, without the burdens of being L on their shoulders. However, even as I type that sentence, I know E is going to be dragged through the darkest pits humanity has to offer. With that said, seeing how they are going to read this file at some point, good luck E.
I pressed my lips into a fine line as I closed the file. I sat back and slowly shook my head, scratching my nose. He was right, of course he was. I have seen the worst in humans on this case, not personally, but I know it's out there. Between the internet hate I get for being I, and the news reports, I found myself wondering if I was doing the right thing.
"Yeah? It's a file on a person that was on the case," I finally responded with a shrug, my voice dead. I looked at Rester, knowing exactly why he had showed me this file, but I wanted him to ask, I wanted this on camera. So, I was playing the innocent card, it works a lot of times, and assuming he didn't remember my memory I would be good.
"You are the 'E' mentioned in the file aren't you? There was something about you, how you explained the case that seemed familiar, almost exactly as the other files," he said with a sigh as he leaned forward, his face softening. "Why didn't you tell us?"
I smirked and looked to the dark wall to my left, blinking rather quickly. "Because I forgot about it. Look I know how ridiculous that sounds, given that page 2 has an in-depth analysis on how my memory works based on his observation, but I haven't looked at this file since I retyped it. It...it was just too painful, it still is to a point"
Rester nodded and stood up, looking down at me. I watched as he held out my hand to me. I looked at it for a second before scrambling to my feet and shook it. "Welcome to the team E." My heart swelled up as I smiled in return. "If you need anything, let us know and you'll get it, no questions asked."
"Uhh," was all I could say, confused at this hospitality as well as the name. After the handshake I slowly said drawing out each word slightly. "What's with the name?" He shrugged. I mimicked it and picked up the fruit and apple juice as I started to walk outside, where Linder was standing, her eyes wide.
I stopped and let an emotionless mask take over. She was standing his her hands at her side, her right moved up to hold onto her own left forearm as she shifted her weight. My eyes narrowed at this display as I turned toward Rester slightly to ask him what he had to say on the situation. Her clearing her throat was what kept my mouth shut.
"Ebony I –" I held up my hand to cut her off, balancing the bowl on the glass. I smiled reassuringly as I shook my head.
"Don't, I understand. I would've done the same thing. You have nothing to apologize for," especially since I was planning on "borrowing" one of their helicopters at some point unannounced. I know he said I didn't have to worry about things like that, but I didn't want to be tracked or anything. That and I just wanted to see what their reaction would be when I pull stunts like that, because it wasn't going to be the only one.
I am sorry for the unexpected hiatus, and I don't really have a good excuse. Long story short, I got into Homestuck and it's one of those fandoms that consume you, so that's what I've been doing, as well as the typical "How do I college?" thing because I am having to do all of the applications and stuff, and I am the first one in my family to do so.
I really have nothing else to say here but I am sorry Guest, whoever you may be, you waited forever for this and the last chapter. So again, sorry. I'll try to be a little timelier on my updates. Seriously, bug me if I start to take too long, I won't mind.
Thanks for reading, reviewing, favoriting, and following, you guys are awesome.