When her boys were in high school Anna and Acnologia traveled often. Usually the trips were business related for him and she just tagged along to get away. The expensive hotels and add-ons he made sure she had access to were, in her opinion, his way of trying to make up for traveling so often when the boys were smaller. She'd never considered one trip every few months to be excessive but if he wanted to upgrade the plane tickets or hotels, Anna wouldn't complain.

Once Sofia came along, Anna hesitated to confirm plans so easily. She worried about Siegrain and Jenny. Of course they had everything they needed, including a list of qualified sitters on standby - but she still worried. Her middle son had taken a lot on his own shoulders and carried the weight of it all with a charming sort of grace. Anna wondered how much of it was a front. Despite her concerns, Siegrain proved himself a capable parent. Sofia was a delightful baby, and Jenny was a wonderful and attentive mother. Anna didn't think the situation could've turned out any better if they'd planned it. This was the only reason she consented to travel with her husband when a toddler lived in her house sixty percent of the time.

Anna still worried, though. She worried about all her boys and tried to keep up via text message. Were they eating properly? Mystogan sometimes forgot to eat. Jellal would live on cheese crackers if Erza didn't collect him for meals. Siegrain had been caught more than once eating baby food over his laptop while Sofia slept. Group chats were a mistake. Her boys fed off one another so she'd taken to keeping separate threads. Siegrain usually took the longest to respond so she texted him first, then Mystogan, and finally Jellal.

Jellal responded right away with a picture of a takeout spread. Erza's socks were visible on the edge of the photo so Anna was grateful.

Mystogan responded with a photo of what looked very much like ramen noodles with… a slice of processed cheese on top?

'What's that?'

'Ramen with cheese. It's not really nutritionally viable but it's what I have.'

'Mystogan, we send you money for food. Why are you eating ramen with plastic cheese? Do you need more money?'

Before Mystogan responded Siegrain sent a photo of himself with no shirt on, maybe ten strings of party beads around his neck and a bottle of what looked like malt liquor.

'What am I looking at, Siegrain?'

'P4r7y 7ym3'

'What? Are you drinking? Where's Sofia?'

'No clue. Swimming maybe.'

'Siegrain this isn't funny. Why do you and your brothers want to scare me?'

'I'm kidding mom. Sofia's in bed. I'm living it up in my Minecraft strip club.'

'Jellal would never say these things to me.'

Mystogan finally responded and Anna felt her face twist into a scowl.

'I spent all my money on uppers. I've been awake for three days.'

'You and Siegrain are horrible children.'

'I'm fine, mom. I swear I'm sleeping and I pulled the ramen pic off Google.'

'You boys are getting bags of charcoal for Christmas. Store brand.'

Anna switched her phone off and tossed it aside. How had she managed to raise such smart ass children? She needed a drink.