Closer Reality

A/N: Thanks so much for all the reviews and alerts, and a special thank you to the guest reviews that I can't answer individually. Every one is appreciated. Huge hugs once again to Gibbsredhoodie and Kesterpan for keeping me knee deep in bunnies.

Chapter 37 – Reminders

Jackson was silent for a while longer, obviously deep in his thoughts, and Abby let him be. The evening had landed a great deal in Jackson's lap and it was a lot for him to take in. Abby was quite content to sit and take in the scene around her as the hall filled up, or watch Gibbs as he talked to his friends.

On the other side of Jackson, Carol smiled up at Tobias, looping her arm through his. "Everything okay?" she asked softly. "You gonna be able to enjoy the evening now or is a panic attack still imminent?"

Tobias nodded, smirking. "I'll let you know... sorry about earlier."

Carol shook her head. "No need... I understand, Tobias, really I do. Your situation can't be easy and I, er... I doubt I'm making it any easier."

As well as what Tobias had hinted at already, Carol could easily see how the wounds between Fornell and Diane would be fresher than those between Gibbs and Diane simply because it was more recent, and that was without factoring Emily into the equation.

Maybe a longer time span since they divorced and no kids had allowed Gibbs to cut the emotional rope to Diane more easily... or at least suppress the urge to strangle her with it?

"Easy's not a word that should ever be used in the same sentence as... her, no," Tobias admitted wryly. "And you don't make it more difficult, Caz... quite the opposite, although I don't like exposing you to it all though."

Carol nudged him. "Hey... I'm involved just by being with you."

"I know."

"And that's okay, really it is," Carol told him seriously, seeing the worry in his eyes.

Tobias gazed at her for a moment, lowering his voice. "Feel real guilty about that."

Carol smiled reassuringly. "Well, there's no need. I can't pretend I'm not apprehensive about meeting her because I am, and I'm nervous about what could happen in the weeks and months ahead... who wouldn't be? But I think it's worth it... as long as you don't think me being here, or being with you as in with you, is going to make things awkward for you?"

Carol eyed him somewhat anxiously. The question was whether Tobias thought it was worth the effort, and they were too 'new' together for her to be able to read him that easily.

"We went through this, Caz?" Tobias reminded her.

Carol nodded as she replied quietly, "Yeah, I know we did... but I don't underestimate how much trouble she could cause you over Emily, and I know you need to put your daughter first."

Tobias reached out to cup her face in his hand, emphasizing each word. "Not gonna let her ruin this."

Carol leaned into his palm. "Was hoping you'd say that," she murmured.

Tobias was the first man she'd been involved with for a while who didn't view Fisher as an inconvenience to be ignored or got out of the way, but as a person in his own right to be accepted into their relationship. Carol hoped she could do the same for him, with Emily.

Carol knew it wouldn't be easy, especially with them being a 'mixed' couple and with both the kids to take into consideration, and with her hovering over everything like some looming storm cloud.

But Carol was damned if she was going to fall at the first hurdle before they'd even tried to make this work... or be intimidated into giving up by some tall redhead.

Tobias pressed a kiss to her hair as he promised. "We'll figure it out."

When Gibbs returned to their seats, he settled in next to Abby at the end of the row, folding his coat on his lap and picked up her hand to lace their fingers together, gracing her with his half grin.

"That was cool to bump into friends like that," Abby observed. She noticed that even just those few minutes with his friends had eased a lot of the tension in Gibbs and he looked much more relaxed.

Gibbs nodded. "Sure was. Saw 'em last month at their son's football game."

"Is Tom still in the Corps?" Abby asked curiously.

"Nah, not any more. He runs a lumber yard on the edge of town. They put their savings into it. It's doing well."

Abby eyed him sideways. "A lumber yard, huh?"

Gibbs met her gaze and Abby could see the gleam of amusement deep in his blue eyes. "S'what I said. It's the one I use if I can."

"Wood, hmm." Abby mused, smiling. "I'm beginning to wonder if wood is a Marine thing too?"

Gibbs smirked. "Could be... another buddy's a sawyer."

Abby laughed. "Oh, this just gets better." She nudged him. "Tell me, do you all get together in a corner at the Marine Corps Ball and have a celebratory whittle... or, maybe a sanding competition, while downing shots of bourbon."

Gibbs snorted. "Don't tell Tom, you'll give him ideas." He shifted sideways to meet her gaze. "Margaret wants us over for dinner. Said I'd ask ya."

"I'd love to... if you want to," Abby added, hesitantly.

"Sure... Wanna show you off," said Gibbs simply.

Abby stared at him in surprise. "Oh... okay then."

"What?" Gibbs tilted his head, examining her eyes, his own shining with affection. "You didn't think I'd wanna?"

"No, it's not that... it's just..." Abby broke off, unsure how to express her thoughts without offending him. "You've always kept most of your personal life separate from work, right?"

"Yeah, guess I have," acknowledged Gibbs.

"So I guess I'm still getting used to being involved in that side of your life... getting used to it in a good way that is... I mean..." she trailed off lamely, biting her lip.

Gibbs smiled, squeezing her hand. "I get it, Abbs. Works the same for me too."

Abby nodded. "Maybe so, although you pretty much know everything I do... and a lot of my past, but yeah, you're right. There's lots of new things to learn and share about each other, and do together... kinda like the thought of that."

Gibbs looked down at their entwined hands, his ring glinting in the light as he told her quietly. "There's a whole part of my life, my past, you don't know about... the years with the Corps and before we met. Wanna share it, if I can."

"I'd like that," Abby told him softly, a smile spreading across her face.

Gibbs raised her hand to press a kiss to the palm before resting their joined hands on her lap, on top of her coat. "Good."

Abby smiled back, warmed by the affection she could see in his eyes and the half grin that tugged at his mouth. She leaned in to whisper in his ear. "Although I could be in trouble if all you Marines with a wood fetish are in the same room at the same time, given how much I get off on sawdust."

Gibbs raised an eyebrow, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. "Really?"

"Too much information?" she asked, tilting her head to one side to see his face more easily.

This time his grin was cocky. "No, just enough."

Abby giggled, nudging into his shoulder and Gibbs turned his head to press a kiss to her cheek, lips brushing the skin in front of her ear and making her shiver. She relaxed against him, enjoying the warmth of his hand and the feel of his solid bulk next to her.

Abby looked along the row of seats towards where Carol and Fornell were talking. Jackson was still silent, looking preoccupied as he gazed around the hall, and Abby reached out to squeeze his hand and Jackson turned his head to smile at her.

"I'm nervous, Jack. Are you nervous?" Abby bent forward to look beyond Jackson to Carol and Fornell. "Anybody else nervous down there coz I am and I don't remember being this nervous at my school concerts."

"Well, sheesh, Abbs," Carol rolled her eyes, smirking. "Tobias has just got a death grip on my hand, so I guess you could say one of us is... so thanks for the reminder. You are so not helping."

Fornell ran his hand over his head. "If I hadn't already lost my hair, I think this kinda thing would finish me off."

Jackson chuckled, raising Abby's hand to kiss the back of it. "You hang onto me, Abby. We'll tough it out together."

"I wonder what the collective blood pressure is in this room from all these anxious parents crammed in together like this," Carol wondered. "Pity we can't harness all that nervous energy before it lifts the roof off."

Abby chuckled. "A sort of collective blood pressure gestalt... powerful stuff."

"I swear I'm more nervous at one of these concerts than anything work throws at me," Fornell put in. "And it doesn't get any easier as the years go by."

"Is Emily nervous?" asked Jackson.

Fornell shook his head. "Amazingly enough, no. I spoke to her earlier and she was really looking forward to it... she ended up calming me down."

"What about Fisher?" asked Gibbs. "Did he have a school concert?"

Tobias answered. "He told me the other day he didn't have to be in one yet."

Carol laughed. "Fisher said concerts were only for girls. He wasn't too thrilled when I said his time would come."

They chatted for a while longer and when Carol leaned forward to ask Gibbs a question, he bent forward to reply, leaning an arm on Abby's leg and she rested a hand on his back as he talked to Carol. She was unable to resist smoothing her hand over his jacket, across the broad shoulders, her fingers just brushing the short hair on the back of his neck. As he felt the gesture, Gibbs turned his head to throw her a quick smile, blue eyes twinkling.

As Jackson turned to talk to Fornell, Abby's gaze was drawn to look beyond Tobias, only to see Diane standing on the other side of the hall, looking their way, a neutral expression on her face.

When Diane met Abby's gaze, she tilted her head, smiling briefly but politely before turning away to greet a couple who were being ushered into the row of seats next to her by Victor.

Abby dropped her eyes, feeling her face flush against her will and met Carol's gaze, who winked at her, gesturing as if pushing her chin up. As Gibbs sat back in his seat next to her, Abby felt him squeeze her hand and she turned to him.

Gibbs held her gaze, tilting his head. "Ignore her."

"I'll try. Easier said than done though." Abby smiled, nodding slowly, becoming lost in those blue eyes and the reassurance they always gave her, and almost didn't hear a male voice calling her name.

"Abby? Is that you?"

Abby turned to see one of the teachers approaching down the side of the hall. "David!" She waved excitedly as he approached and stood up, dumping her coat on the seat.

"I almost didn't recognize you without your pigtails," explained David with a wide smile.

Abby laughed self-consciously, gesturing vaguely at her hair. "Oh, yeah, I'd forgotten."

Abby glanced at Gibbs, who was also rising to his feet. "Jethro... this is David Rintle, Emily's chemistry teacher. David, this is Jethro Gibbs, my partner."

Gibbs nodded as he shook David's hand, eyes assessing the other man and Abby suppressed a chuckle at the hand which curled around her waist as he stood next to her.

"And this is Jackson, Jethro's father... and I guess, my father in law now," Abby went on and Jackson greeted the teacher, shaking his hand as he threw a wide grin at Abby.

Fornell waved from further down the row and David nodded back, moving down the partially empty row in front to shake his hand. Fornell gestured at Carol next to him. "This is Carol, my erm,... my girlfriend." He glanced at Carol. "Sorry Caz."

Abby surreptitiously elbowed Gibbs as she heard the quiet snort behind her at Fornell's verbal stutter and she felt him tug her ponytail. Carol rolled her eyes, holding her hand to David with a smile. "Hello, yes, I'm the 'erm' girlfriend. Emily's told me a lot about you... all good things."

"So you're Carol," answered David enthusiastically as he grasped her hand. "Emily's been telling me all about you this week and where you work. It'll be good to have another scientist out there in the real world who I can pester for things."

Abby laughed. "Oh, you're very good at that."

"I have a degree in it." David's grin was unrepentant. "Abby's been a big help on several school science projects. The kids listen to her in class far more than they do me."

Abby found herself blushing and felt Gibbs' hand tighten on her waist as she replied. "That's only because I usually end up blowing things up for them."

"Well, there is that," David smiled. "Actually I'm sorry to interrupt the party but do you have a minute, Abby? I wanted to ask you something... I've got an idea for a project and wanted to see if you could help, or make a few suggestions who else I can pester."

"Sure, David." Abby turned towards Carol. "And I have another volunteer right here, too."

"You do?" asked David eagerly.

Carol raised an eyebrow, smirking. "You do?"

Abby grinned. "I do... get your butt out here. You gotta sing for your supper, missy."

Carol turned to Fornell who was grinning and raising his hands. "Don't look at me. I'm not gonna argue with her."

Carol rolled her eyes. "Some help you are." She stood up and Jackson made to get up. "No, you don't need to move, Jack. I can squeeze past. It's more fun that way anyway."

Jackson grinned. "I'll not argue with that, Carol."

Abby turned to shuffle past Gibbs and rested her hands on his shoulders as he ushered her past, hands on her waist and she grinned at him, seeing the amused smirk on his face. Carol followed and the three of them disappeared down the side of the hall.

Gibbs met his dad's eye as he sat down again and Jackson smiled. "Don't know how she finds the time with the hours Abby works. Sounds like she does a fair bit outside of work for lots of folks?"

"She does a lot more than even I know about, dad."

Jackson looked as if he was about to say something else, staring at his son for a few moments. When Jackson eventually spoke, Gibbs got the feeling it wasn't what he'd set out to say. "Not gonna say anything to Diane you don't want me to, son," he told Gibbs softly.

Surprised, Gibbs stared back before nodding slowly, clearing his throat. "Thanks, dad. Just... just trying to protect Abby."

Jackson nodded. "I understand, son. And that's understandable. I wanna protect her too."

"We'll talk later... if you want?" offered Gibbs.

Gibbs didn't relish the third degree from his dad but he guessed he owed the guy some details, especially if Jackson was actually going to bump into the she-wolf tonight and end up drawing his own conclusions.

Jackson smiled, looking pleased. "Thanks, Leroy. Whenever we've got time... don't wanna ruin your evening. We've got all week."

Gibbs nodded. "Okay."

Jackson gestured with his head at the rapidly filling hall, the buzz of nervous excitement in the air and the preparations on stage. "D'ya remember the last time we were at one of these? That last Christmas... at Kelly's school. I remember us all laughing so much... especially when the scenery collapsed and the kids just kept right on singing. It was a great evening... if only I'd known..." Jackson trailed off, shaking his head.

Gibbs felt his throat close over and all he could was nod in reply, the pain in Jackson's eyes mirroring his own.

"Last time I... saw the girls, Leroy," Jackson went on softly, his gaze distant, obviously lost in his memories.

In a way, the girls were the only common ground he now had with his son, as well as memories of Leroy's mom. Jackson hoped he was building a new bridge between them with Abby's help but in the meantime, all Jackson had was his memories of those short years when his son was married and he had his precious granddaughter to spoil.

Gibbs reached out to place a hand on his arm, squeezing. "I know, dad."

Jackson patted his son's hand. Both men knowing there was nothing to say that would be even remotely adequate or ease the pain.

Gibbs knew the evening Jackson referred to.

How could he not?

It had been his last Christmas with his girls too.

Being here tonight was already a reminder of several of Kelly's school concerts which he'd managed to attend, and the conversation about being nervous had jostled quite a few memories loose.

And Jackson's all too vivid reminder just now only increased that overload of memories and it didn't take much effort for his mind to go back to a different time in a different school hall, a couple of years before he lost his girls.

"Did you bring your hip flask, Gibbs?"

Gibbs chuckled as he glanced at the redhead at his side. "Sounds like I should've."

Shannon rolled her eyes, a smile tugging at her lips. "No kidding. I'm sure this is going to send me grey sooner rather than later."

"I'll keep a lookout for the first grey hair." Gibbs grinned, his smile widening at the mock glare she sent his way.

"Oh, I bet you will," laughed Shannon. "Although there's more than one or two grey hairs in that high and tight, I noticed lately."

Gibbs ran his hand over his head. "Comes from all the nagging."

Shannon poked an elbow into his side. "Suck it up, Marine. Y'know, I remember being really nervous like this at school when I was in a concert."

"While Joann was biting her nails in the audience."

"Oh yeah," Shannon nodded, looping her arm through his and leaning into his side. "But Kelly told me this morning she wasn't nervous at all. Seemed quite proud of herself that she wasn't."

"That's my girl," said Gibbs smugly.

Shannon eyed him. "Mmm... more like she's trying not to show she's nervous in front of her dad."

Gibbs shrugged, smirking. "Same thing." He glanced at his wife, waiting till she met his gaze. "You spoke to her biology teacher yet?"

Shannon sighed. "Yeah... this morning. She wants to see us both after the concert for a brief word if we can."

"Kelz still not doing okay in that class?"

"Apparently not," Shannon answered, pursing her lips.

"Well, that's gonna be a problem if she still wants to be a vet." Gibbs paused. "She does still want that, right? I didn't miss a change of mind again while I was away?"

Shannon chuckled. "Nope... we're still on course for anything to do with horses. Although that'll probably change if we give it time."

"Long way to go yet," Gibbs reminded her and his wife nodded, resting her head briefly on his shoulder.

"Sure is... but gonna be so proud of her whatever she ends up doing," Shannon said softly and they exchanged smiles.

He turned to press a kiss to her hair, inhaling the sweet scent of her shampoo. "Me too, Shan."

A hand on his shoulder drew him out of his memories and Gibbs blinked up at Abby standing by his side, Carol behind her.

Gibbs moved hurriedly to stand up and let Carol and Abby through. As she settled in beside him, Abby gazed at him, looking concerned. "You okay?" she asked him softly.

Gibbs nodded, not quite able to banish the vivid memories from the front of his mind just yet. He settled for looping an arm around her shoulders and resting a hand on her hair, tangling his fingers in her ponytail, needing the physical contact to settle himself.

Abby continued to stare at him, obviously sensing something was hinky. Gibbs was grateful when she didn't press him, but merely leaned her head against his shoulder in an unconscious imitation of Shannon's actions in his memory just now, and he pushed down the wave of emotion which threatened to rise up and choke him.

Gibbs was thankful when the lights began to dim to hide his face and Abby straightened in her seat, facing front as the concert began.

TBC...