- canceroGeneticist [CG] began pestering temporallyCapricious [TC] -
CG: GAMZEE, I'VE BEEN MEANING TO TALK TO YOU
CG: BUT REALLY, THAT IS ONLY BECAUSE I'VE BEEN MEANING TO TALK TO EVERYONE.
TC: SuP My mOtHeRfUcKiN InVeRtEbRoThEr
TC: i sUpPoSe tHaT SoMe pReTtY ImPoRtAnT MoThErFuCkIn sHiT MuSt bE SmOkIn uP In yOuR PoT?
CG: FOR THE LAST TIME, I AM NOT YOUR INVERTEBROTHER
CG: THE ROLE OF MY INVERTEBROTHER, OR, TO USE AN OLD ALTERNIAN TERM, MY MOIRAIL, HAS BEEN TAKEN OVER BY KANAYA SINCE, LIKE, FOREVER AGO.
CG: LET'S JUST FACE IT, SHE IS MUCH MORE TOLERABLE THAN YOU ARE.
CG: NOT TO MENTION THAT NOTHING CAN BE EXPLAINED TO YOU WHILE YOU'RE STONED
CG: AND NOTHING CAN BE EXPLAINED TO YOU WHILE YOU'RE NOT STONED BECAUSE THEN YOU'RE BATSHIT INSANE.
TC: Oh cOmE On
TC: a sToNeD JuGgAlO LiKe mYsElF AiNt nEeD No eXpLaNaTiOn fOr aNyThIn
TC: It jUsT RuInS ThE MaGiC Y'KnOw?
CG: AND THAT IS THE PRECISE REASON WHY YOU CAN'T GET A JOB AND MAKE SOME MONEY THAT ISN'T THROWN ONTO YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE A HUGE CLOWN BEGGAR.
CG: IN FACT, I'M CRINGING AT THE VERY THOUGHT OF A CLOWN BEGGAR.
CG: LIKE, A CLOWN THAT CANNOT PERFORM IN A CIRCUS BECAUSE THEY'RE SO WORTHLESS AT ACTING, BUT WHO WANTS TO BE A CLOWN ANYWAY.
CG: SO THEY STEP UP IN THE STREETS AND BEGIN CLOWNING AROUND THERE.
CG: BUT THE POLICE CATCHES THEM, SO THEY CAN'T REALLY CLOWN AND THEY ARE REDUCED TO BEGGING.
TC: oH CoMe oN YoU ReAlLy hAd tO ExPlAiN ThE ShIt i'm iNtO
TC: WeLl iN ThE LeAsT I'Ve nO MoThErFuCkIn cLuE WhAt a cLoWn iS
TC: cLoWnS ArE JuSt tOo mAiNsTrEaM So nO OnE WaNtS To bE ThEm oR KnOw aNyThInG BoUt tHeIr mOtHeRfUcKiN BuSiNeSs
TC: So tHeY BeCoMe jUgGaLoS
CG: AND YOUR JUGGALOS WORSHIP TWO PEOPLE NAMED INSANE *CLOWN* POSSE.
CG: SO MAYBE CLOWNS ARE RELEVANT AFTER ALL.
CG: HAVEN'T YOU THOUGHT OF THAT?
CG: OR IS YOUR SHELL OF POT SIMPLY IMPENETRABLE?
TC: tHeRe iS No sHeLl tHoUgH
TC: ThErE Is oNlY MoThErFuCkIn pOt
TC: sO I'M StOnEd lIkE AlL ThE TiMe
TC: CoUlDn't iMaGiNe iT AnY OtHeR WaY ThOuGh
CG: NO, I'M PRETTY SURE THERE IS A SHELL.
CG: WHERE DO YOU THINK INSANE SOBER GAMZEE COMES FROM?
TC: dOn't rUiN ThE MaGiC So qUiCkLy
TC: I AiN'T InSaNe lIkE YoU PuRpOrT ThAt i aM SoMeTiMeS
TC: cOuLd a gUy lIkE Me rEaLlY TrAnSfOrM So mUcH As tO Go oN A MuRdEr sPrEe lIkE YoU ClAiM I Do?
CG: YES.
CG: AS A MATTER OF FACT, YES, HE CAN.
CG: I MEAN YOU CAN.
CG: YOU GUYS REALLY NEED TO STOP REFERRING TO YOURSELVES IN THE THIRD PERSON.
CG: YOU REALIZE THAT'S WHAT THE FIRST PERSON IS FOR, RIGHT?
CG: I MEAN, SERIOUSLY.
CG: LET'S TAKE EVERYTHING FROM THIS CONVERSATION AND YOUR SURROUNDINGS AWAY, AND NAME THE THINGS ALL ANEW.
CG: WHO'S THE FIRST PERSON THAT YOU CAN THINK OF?
TC: UhHhHhH
TC: yOuR MeTaPhOr iS JuSt a lItTlE BiT CoNfUsInG
TC: CoUlD YoU LiKe eXpLaIn iN NoRmAl wOrDs?
CG: THE ANSWER IS YOURSELF.
CG: YOU ARE THE FIRST PERSON IN YOUR PERCEPTIONAL BUBBLE.
CG: YOU ARE SIMPLY "YOU", RATHER THAN "A GUY LIKE YOU" OR WHATEVER.
TC: bUt i tHoUgHt i wAs mOtHeRfUcKiN GaMzEe
CG: THAT NAME IS ONLY RESERVED FOR THE TIMES WHEN WE'RE DISCUSSING SOMEONE OTHER THAN ME OR YOU.
CG: FOR EXAMPLE, "INSANE SOBER GAMZEE" THAT I MENTIONED PREVIOUSLY.
CG: YOU DON'T RECOGNIZE HIM, AND WHEN YOU'RE IN THAT FORM YOU DON'T RECOGNIZE YOU.
CG: YOURSELF...
CG: FUCK IT.
CG: YOU THINK THERE WOULD BE A GOOD GRAMMAR BOOK ON ALTERNIA SO I WOULD KNOW THIS SHIT EVER SINCE I WAS A GRUB, BUT NO.
CG: ALL THE GOOD GRAMMAR BOOKS HAVE TO RESIDE ON THE EARTH AND BE NAMED AFTER AN EARTH NATION NAMED ENGLAND.
CG: WHAT DID ENGLAND DO TO BECOME THIS HUGE ASSHOLE OF THE WORLD WHO GETS DIBS ON THE FUCKING LANGUAGE NAME OF THE ENTIRE PLANET?
TC: SeE ThIs iS WhAt hApPeNs wHeN YoU MoThErFuCkIn oVeRtHiNk sHiT
TC: yOu bEcOmE AlL WoRkEd uP AnD AnGrY FoR No mOtHeRfUcKiN ReAsOn
TC: So jUsT ChIlLaX, sToP OvErThInKiN MoThErFuCkIn sHiT, sToP YoUr tHoUgHtS RiGhT In tHeIr aSsEs, AnD GeT To tHe iMpOrTaNt sHiT
CG: NO, I AM NOT GOING TO STOP THAT.
CG: YOU KNOW WHY?
CG: BECAUSE OVERTHINKING SHIT MAKES ME A FUCKING INTELLIGENT PERSON.
CG: WHICH YOU SHOULD WISH TO BE, BECAUSE THEN I CAN USE MY AMAZING WITS TO GET GOOD AT SCHOOL.
CG: IF I GET GOOD AT SCHOOL I WILL KNOW HOW TO GET GOOD AT COLLEGE.
CG: AND IF I GET GOOD AT COLLEGE I WILL KNOW HOW TO GET GOOD AT THE JOB I'M DOING AND EARN FUCKING MONEY THAT YOU COULDN'T EVEN HAVE DREAMT OF! ! ! ! !
CG: I REST MY CASE.
CG: THOUGH, YEAH, I HAVE THE IMPORTANT SHIT RIGHT HERE, JUST WAITING FOR YOU IN PLAIN SIGHT.
CG: http / www. mspaintadventures. com ?s=6&p=003892
TC: wHoA, wHo hAd tHe bRiGhT IdEa tHaT WiThOuT ArMs pEoPlE LoOk a wHoLe lOt bEtTeR?
TC: ThOuGh wHy wOuLd i wAnT To eNtEr yOuR NaMe?
CG: BECAUSE THE ANDREW GUY IS A DOUCHEBAG.
CG: HE'S A DOUCHEBAG WITH NO SENSE OF PRIVACY.
TC: yOu'rE StIlL GeTtInG WoRkEd uP FoR AlL ThE IrReLeVaNt sHiT
TC: So rEaLlY YoU NeEd tO ChIlLaX AnD QuIt bEiNg aNgRy aLl tHe tImE
CG: WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
CG: YOU NEED TO QUIT BEING STONED ALL THE TIME.
CG: PERHAPS, IF YOU'RE NOT STONED ANYMORE, YOU WILL ONLY WANT TO GO ON A MURDER SPREE VERY BRIEFLY.
CG: THEN THE ENTIRE WORLD WILL OPEN UP IN NEW COLORS AND YOU WILL BE ABLE TO JUDGE STUFF LIKE A NORMAL FUCKING TROLL.
CG: OF COURSE, YOU WON'T GET ANYTHING FROM THIS, SO WHY AM I EVEN TRYING.
TC: rEmEmBeRiN OuR OlD MoIrAiL DaYs i sEe?
TC: It's nIcE AnD AlL ThAt yOu aRe sTiLl wIlLiNg tO ReCoNcIlE EvEn aFtEr aLl tHe bAd sHiT ThAt hApPeNeD To uS So fAr
CG: OH YEAH OH FUCK I FORGOT
CG: YOU'RE NOT MY MOIRAIL ANYMORE, ARE YOU.
CG: AND I JUST OPENED UP TO YOU LIKE A HUGE DOUCHEBAG WHO HAS NO IDEA HOW LIFE WORKS.
CG: I GUESS I WILL WEEP IN A CORNER UNTIL THEN.
CG: EXCEPT I WON'T WEEP IN A CORNER BECAUSE I STILL HAVE TWO MORE TROLLS TO PESTER.
CG: THE ARROGANT FISH FREAK AND THE ONE WHO'S CONSTANTLY HITTING ON ME.
TC: gO FoR ThE OnE WhO'S CoNsTaNtLy hItTiNg oN YoU ThEn
TC: MaYbE YoU DoN'T KnOw tHaT YoU TwO ArE DeStInEd fOr a wOnDeRfUl mOtHeRfUcKiN MaTeSpRiTsHiP
CG: WE ARE NOT DESTINED FOR A WONDERFUL MOTHERFUCKING...
CG: I MEAN A WONDERFUL MATESPRITSHIP, BUT YOU KNOW, WHATEVER THE HELL.
CG: NEPETA IT IS.
CG: I'M NOT TOO SURE IF I SHOULD MESSAGE YOU AT OTHER TIMES, BUT I SUPPOSE TIME WILL TELL.
TC: wElL ThEn mOtHeRfUcKiN ByE I SuPpOsE
CG: MOTHER-
CG: I MEAN BYE.
- canceroGeneticist [CG] ceased pestering temporallyCapricious [TC] -
Yup, down to the two worst trolls that I ever knew. Well, let's get this thing over with, shall we?
10. Nepeta, Karkat scribbled, took a deep breath, and went on to message the one who was constantly hitting on him.