Cearbhail: Ok, it's been a while. I took a small exodus...or however it's spelled. I was taking a break, ok? Well, anyway. The new chapter's out. Hope you enjoy and stuff.

Dear journal,

Where to begin? Oh… well… today's been something. Asger is meeting with Ulfric right now, both of them are talking it up with Cecilie over something. Well, they're waiting for me, but I'm stuck having lunch with Maleek and Babette. They're acting and talking like buddies who haven't seen each other in a long time and are having some sort of catch-up date. Ruby is stalking nearby, trying to keep more or less hidden from us. To her credit, she's not just hiding behind a building and glaring around the corner like she used to. No, she's walking around in circles, finding stuff near us to do while appearing bored. I can tell she's trying to keep her eyes on Maleek. I'm beginning to think that she has some sort of crush on Maleek and can't stand to see him with another girl. It's weird.

Speaking of which, this girl is weird. I wanted to squirm out of the little lunch date, but she insisted that I joined them. She won't take her eyes off me. It's like she's planning on killing me or something. I can't stand it. If that's not enough, listening to them talk about their job is bothersome.

Lydia…

…

"What are you writing?" Babette asked as she looked up at me.

I closed my journal and glanced around the tavern. The tavern was pretty empty, but the bartender was just around the corner. Not surprisingly enough, the two assassins chose a corner table where they could put their backs to the walls so they could watch everything. They also chose the darkest corner where no one would look and where no one could really hear them while they talked quietly about their business.

We had been here for a couple minutes already. Babette ordered water and Maleek ordered some sort of tree sap juice. I ordered mead. I feel like I'm going to want to forget everything that happens today. The last thing I want is to remember two assassins talking, especially two kids.

I looked down at Babette, who glanced up at me with the most serious set of eyes I've ever seen. She looked down at my closed journal. "What did you write? Am I mentioned?"

I nodded and pulled my journal closer to me. "Yes. Why?"

She smiled thinly as she said, "Well…you know my profession. You also know that in my profession…no one can know who I am or what I do. So…for you to mention me in your journal…and make any sort of clue as to what I do for a living…you would have to die."

The area grew cold and silent as we sat there, waiting for our waiter to approach us with our drinks. Babette continued to glare at me, leaning towards me with a nasty glare. "I can smell your fear, Lydia. Hand me your journal, please. I wish to read your current entry."

I quietly handed my journal over to her as the waiter walked up with our drinks. He handed us our drinks. He looked us over for a second before asking, "So, have you decided what you want to eat?"

Babette had not even looked at a menu since coming here. "Steak."

"And how would you…"

"Rare…very rare." She said, looking up at him.

The waiter stood there for a second before nodding and looking away. "Ok, and for you, sir?"

Maleek shrugged. "I'll take the juniper soup. And maybe a small salad."

The waiter tilted his head to the side. "What's a salad?" He shrugged before looking over at me. "Whatever. And you, ma'am?"

I sighed as I looked at the menu. Let's see. There was: wolf patties, steak, regular meat patties, leafy appetizers assembled in a bowl…whatever that was. Honestly, who in Skyrim would order a bowl of leafy appetizers? I shook my head, considering how on Nirn we could even grow anything leafy in our frigid temperatures. Once I saw the baked potato as one of their recommended dishes, I pointed at the picture and said, "Loaded potato."

"Loaded with what, ma'am?" He asked, preparing to write my precise instructions.

"Wolf bacon bits, goat cheese, and some sort of hot saucy substance juice, preferably from some sort of hot spicy plant or seed." I said.

He looked at me in surprise. "It's called a pepper, ma'am. Imported from Black Marsh. It's called the 'Novapenyo'. Hottest pepper ever concocted. Said to have been made in an alchemist lab in the hidden lands of Black Marsh, under the orders of a spiteful king of who wanted his warriors to have a eye-burning blinding dust and stomach-turning hot-fast-crapping poison for not only incapacitating assassination targets but also for quick escapes. Every shadowscale in Black Marsh was supposedly fed this pepper since the day of their birth to become immune to the hotness, the dust, and the poison. The juice is said to burn through the hardest of souls…leaving the consumer an empty husk of their old selves, crying every day, waking up in attempted cold-sweats from screaming nightmares of the day they even smelled the pepper, let alone consume it."

The waiter finally finished his hushed monologue. I looked around the table, half expecting Asger to walk in from around the corner, playing some sort of soft dark tune that hinted to some sort of back story or very dramatic moment. The waiter himself leaned towards the only lit lantern, lighting up his face enough to outline his features and his glare as he looked down at me. "So…do you want to try the novapenyo sauce?"

I nodded and shrugged. "Eh…you only live once. Sure." I said as deadpanned as I could. Although I was both eager and excited over trying something so hot that I could blind someone, I was dead terrified of what could happen to me if I did try to consume such a thing. Curiosity kills the Khajiit in the dark alley of Windhelm…so they say. Even though I was pretty scared and excited, I managed to hold my impassive face as I looked up at the waiter with my signature dead eyes. I could see that he was buying my act and started writing it down in his list of things. He nodded as he walked away, leaving us alone again.

Maleek only chuckled before he said, "Wow…he was entertaining."

Babette could only smile. "Yes, I did enjoy his historically accurate tale of the novapenyo."

Maleek only chuckled before saying, "What? No, not that. I mean…he doesn't know what a salad is. Some Wood Elf." He scoffed and shook his head.

Babette only shook her head in amusement. "Maleek…they're cannibals. They eat less lettuce than you eat your own scales." She finally looked over at me and snatched my journal away from me. Damn, I was hoping that she would have forgotten about that. She opened it up and started reading. I could see her smiling as she did so. "Hmm…I do not know this 'Dragonborn Thane' but by the way you describe him, he sounds yummy."

My face started burning as I hid my face. Was she going through the whole thing? I watched in partial horror as she continued reading my entries. "He also seems very relaxed and chilled, while you also portray him as a bit of a badass. In a way, he disgusts you, humiliates you, and yet, you are strangely attracted to his stronger side." She tossed the journal back at me and glared at Maleek. "And you have not killed him yet? By the way the journal describes you as an inadequate bumbling assassin-wannabe clumsy screw-up; I would have to kill you now for endangering our brotherhood and giving us an overall bad image of who we accept as assassins."

She looked over at me and noticed that I was beginning to stretch for my sword. "You, cheerleader. I thought I made it very clear about what would happen if you reached for that weapon around me."

"Cheerleader?" I asked.

She nodded and turned back to Maleek. "Maleek, not only did you accidentally cause your father to trip and break his leg, but you stole his contract. If Veezara had not already shared with me his contract information as his second…I think no one would know that the Dragonborn is even a hit." She stopped talking and started looking innocent just as the waiter came up to us with our food.

He set our dishes down, one at a time. In that few seconds of minor relief, I started looking around. I could see Ruby already sitting on the other side of the room, glancing at us while she ate some type of giant insect. She noticed me and smiled weakly, looking embarrassed at being noticed.

Babette noticed her as well, even if she didn't look at her at all. "That cat has been following us all day long. If I did not catch the smell of your scent on her fur…I would have killed her by now for compromising me."

I sighed as I finally leaned back in my chair. "Oh…my….gods. Stop it with the 'I'm a tough bitch' act." I looked down at her, surprised that I drew any reaction from her. "If you're friends with Maleek, you're good enough for me…even though you're trying to kill my thane…and husband. In fact, you could even say to my thane that you're going to kill him for the Dark Brotherhood and yet…he still would find a place for you in our little group because he's just that stupid and loves dramatic tension. Even though you seem more competent of a killer than anyone else I've ever seen." I finally caught my breath and said, "I bet deep down there is some type of child just screaming to be a child again."

She looked taken aback for a second before flipping her hair back. "Hold that thought." She said as she grabbed the bloody raw steak and shoved her face into it.

I froze as I watched the small girl making love to the large piece of raw meat on the table. Then she picked it up and started shaking it above her head, her teeth still stuck inside the meat. She made a very loud slurping sound as she squeezed the steak, blood dripping down like a waterfall onto the table. When she supposedly finished, she tossed the steak aside and started licking the table.

I turned my face away and looked over at Maleek. "Oh…Maleek. This is disgusting. Does she do this to prove some sort of point? What is she some sort of blood drinker?" That's when the world stopped for me. I felt something very cold come over my shoulder and just over the right side of my neck. I felt very exposed all the sudden. I glanced over at Babette, who was looking up at me with black eyes with yellow irises, her mouth covered in blood. I glanced inside her mouth to see two very pointy teeth. Oh…

..

Crap.

Babette only smiled as she climbed onto the table and grabbed me by my throat. I was suddenly pinned against the wall and my body refused to move. Babette pushed harder and I could feel my throat collapse. "Tell anyone and you're deader than I am."

The sudden illusion in my mind shattered and I found myself still frozen in my seat. Babette was talking mildly to Maleek but took a second to glance up at me. She winked and returned to her conversation with Maleek. Silently, I started eating my loaded potato, already forgetting about the novapenyo sauce. I took my first bite and my tongue cried out in instant horror. I took a deep breath as I tried to cool off my tongue while I reached for my glass of mead. I brought the glass of mead up to my lips and then the whole bottle exploded. Hot shards of glass and ignited alcohol rained across the table, setting the table on fire. Babette was already standing up, blasting Frost magic at the table, killing the alcohol induced fire.

Both Maleek and Babette looked up at me as I tried to fight the hot sauce that had crept down into my lungs. Somehow by just breathing in the fumes of the sauce I was writhing on the ground, trying to cough it out. After a minute of struggling, I finally found myself calming down. My head was spinning, my entire body was sweating coldly, and I was crying over just trying it in the first place. This pepper was going to haunt my dreams for the rest of my life…I already knew it.

Babette looked up at Maleek and said, "Jeez, and here I thought you were stupid." She looked down at me and said, "Come up, Lydia. You're embarrassing yourself."

I slowly slid myself up and sat down in the chair. I finally looked around the table. "Why did my bottle of mead explode?"

Babette only shrugged. "I know that the pepper is sometimes used as an igniting substance in bombs. I'm guessing breathing the fumes of that pepper into that bottle you caused some sort of chain explosion because of the flammability of the alcohol. By the way…just by smelling your breath I picked up the slightest hints of pig urine…why?"

Maleek burst out laughing as he fell to the ground. "Because she and half of the Stormcloak army subjected themselves of Wood Elf abuse!"

I groaned as I looked over at Maleek. "Maleek, stop it. I doubt that the Bosmer found us and purposely gave us pig urine just because the Stormcloaks were nearby."

"Oh…I wouldn't be too surprised by that, ma'am." Our Bosmer waiter said as he walked up with a mop. "You find that the Bosmer around these parts are very hateful of the Stormcloaks. Sure, these Stormcloaks are fighting for their land…but they don't care about us elves. Some of us have decided to fight back a bit. I did hear about a pig farmer who lost his family in a Stormcloak raid so I would guess he just felt like feeding them piss as subtle punishment."

Babette only smiled as she looked up at me. "So…you drank piss water?"

I shook my head. "No…I drank piss wine. You know…alcohol. It's a thing that kills all germs…like anything in piss. Therefore, it was clean wine." Boy, sure that sounded like good logic, but face it…I still drank piss.

Her face said it all, too. "Uh-huh." She said, very deadpanned and disinterested, not to mention a little sarcastic. She crossed her arms and waved at the waiter. "Either way, our meal is over. I'm glad I at least got to eat." She stood up and looked over at me. "Now, I have to meet your meaty boy-toy. Like I said earlier 'he sounds yummy'."

I stood up and followed her out, Maleek right behind me. As soon as he exited the tavern, I looked around for any guards or anyone who could overhear us. I didn't see anyone, so I didn't feel bad when I walked up to her and grabbed her by the shoulder, pulling her towards me. "Now…hold on. Do you even care about who he is or why you're being sent to kill him, let alone who set up the contract in the first place?"

Babette tossed her hair to the side. "Hmm…let me think about it." She stuck her hand out and said, "Paralyze." A green mist flew out of her palm, covering me instantly. She pushed gently on me, knocking me over. "You have thirty seconds to not follow me. Think it over."

Maleek shrugged as he stepped over my frozen body. "Sorry, Lydia. Just be glad she isn't killing you as well. She usually doesn't leave any loose ends."

Babette stopped and turned around. "Hmm, good point, Maleek. Oh well, I still have the element of time. Let's move."

They ran off and I was stuck lying on the ground. Then I saw Ruby glancing down at me from the rooftops. She bounded down, landing next to me. She slid an amethyst ring over my finger and I felt the spell slip away. I stood up and said, "Come, Ruby. We have a meeting to crash." We started running through the streets and said, "Look, I know you like Maleek, sort of, but…you may have to kill him. They're going after Asger."

Ruby only nodded, keeping up with me easily. "Yeah, I figured that. It will be nice to see that we can finally finish our fight. If you want, I can fight the vamp girl and you can do away with Maleek. I kinda want to take her head off anyway."

Thinking of how easily Babette continued to get inside my head, I calculated the possibility that Ruby would not be affected because of her shamanistic training. "Yeah, I'm fine with that. Come now, Asger needs us." I said as we approached the great hall of Windhelm, where Asger and Ulfric were currently having their meeting.

I busted through the doors as the downed guards started standing back up. I had only seconds to take in what I was seeing. There, sitting against a wall, was Babette. Beside her was Asger. They were calmly talking as though they were good buddies. I let out a disbelieving laugh/sigh of relief as I grabbed my head in frustration. Of course…he had to know her. He knew everyone… Stupid Dragonborn curse of being a main character of every subplot.

I caught my breath as I walked up to them, looking down at Babette. "So, change your mind?"

She looked up at me with mild surprise. "What? Oh…that. Um…" She looked away. "Did I mention that he looked tasty? You were right, he's tasty."

I looked over at Ulfric and said, "What did I just miss?"

He barely blinked as he looked down at me. "That little girl just bested my guards and interrupted our war meeting that was put on hold because the Dragonborn would not begin without you. Then, as she lifted him up and threw him around like a rag doll, I bravely wrestled her to the ground, where I would have spanked her for being a disruptive child…had she not bitten me. Then, she flew over to the Dragonborn with wings that sprouted out of her back, screaming like a banshee. Then, the weirdest thing I've even seen happened. Instead of reaching for the bow to his right, or the silver sword behind him, he grabbed a flute and started playing. The girl stopped and just…listened. Then, the Dragonborn gave some type of uplifting empowering speech about why she should not conform to society's standards of vampires and she just…melted in his arms."

I couldn't stop myself from grabbing my head in both amusement and frustration. He won her over by giving her one of his bardic speeches? When was that going to stop? Well, this time it ended up being a good thing. I looked down at Babette and said, "So, are you going to try killing him again?"

Babette only smiled. "Kill who? If I recall correctly, I'm the only person outside Maleek and Veezara who know about this contract. Veezara doesn't even really know who he's after; just that he received a contract. When he broke his foot, since I was his second…he gave it to me. Then, the next day, the contract was gone and so was Maleek. The two of us are the only ones who know who's really on death hunt right now. And it's not like we have a Listener who can listen to the Night Mother anyway. No one will find out that he's still alive anyway."

I could tell by the amount of her babbling that she was trying to explain herself. It wasn't working. I looked over at Ulfric and said, "Sir…you should get yourself looked at. You were just bitten by a vampire."

He nodded and started for the door. "Right, but when I come back, we're having our talk. And…even though I hate vampires, I will let her stay because she did the right thing when she could have done her job instead." He walked through the door, leaving us alone.

I allowed my breath to escape as I looked down at Babette. "See? I knew you'd join us. Somehow…"

Cearbhail: Hmm, next chapter might be more intersting than this one. Don't know yet. One thing's for sure. I may be a good writer or a bad one... but I will never ever... EVER... have an ending as bad as Mass Effect 3... ever.. I wont' allow it.