Lily was worried, no she wasn't sure if that was the right word. Maybe something like anxious, or annoyed, or pissed, of freaked out would be more appropriate for how she was feeling at the moment.
Either way she wasn't feeling great at the moment.
It had been an hour since Gemma had left with Tig in search of Jax. Lily was beyond worried. Jax disappearing and not answering his cell at a time like this was unbelievable.
She kept telling herself that there had to be a reasonable explanation for what had happened with him, but she was having a hard time both believing and accepting that excuse.
It was hard for her to feel hopeful or even sympathetic for whatever was going on with Jax when her old man had been the one busting his ass and stressing himself trying to keep Cameron Hayes alive all night whilst waiting for Jax to get his ass here with proper medical supplies.
What in the hell could have caused Jax to just drop the ball like this and fuck off to God only knows where?
Whatever the answer was Lily didn't like it.
She was aware enough of club ranks and club history to know that Jax was more than likely next in line to take over the presidency of the Sons of Anarchy. It was his destiny after all. He was the golden boy of SAMCRO.
Lily knew that if Jax was going to be any sort of halfway decent club pres, then he had to have his head totally 100 percent in the club. Nothing could get in his way at fullfilling his obligations to SAMCRO. If anything else got into his head lives could be the cost.
His brothers would be counting on him to take care of shit and keep them alive. He couldn't just run off and pull shit like this once he had the gavel.
Lily knew that those thoughts made her sound a hell of a lot like Gemma; thinking that she knew what was best for Jax. Saying that she knew what he did and didn't need to do. Maybe that wasn't such a bad thing though.
It wasn't a bad thing if her old man could be put at risk by Jax's shit. Chibs would follow his club pres into whatever hell lie in front of him. Lily knew that. It was just part of who Chibs was; loyal to the bone.
She wanted that loyalty to be place in a club pres that cared enough to keep his obligations. She wanted to be sure that Jax kept to his responsibilities.
Lily wasn't quite sure what was going on in Jax's head. Was it this shit with Abel and Wendy? Did his kid and his estranged wife have his head so twisted up that he had abandoned his responsibilities to the club?
God she hoped that was it. She prayed that it wasn't what a little voice in the back of head kept on squaking at her; that Dr. Tara Knowles was to blame for Jax's behavior.
She hadn't backed down from her position of not trusting the bitch. Overhearing Tara talk to Hale about her little stalker problem had only strengthened that dislike.
Lily hadn't had the chance to even broach that subject with Jax. It was mostly because she knew how that conversation would go. If Jax didn't know about Tara's problem he'd speed of to fix it for her. If Jax did know about it and had already fixed the problem then it'd just cause an argument.
Lily loved Jax like a brother, but she didn't understand him when it came to Tara.
She knew Jax would claim it was just first love shit, but to Lily it felt more like Tara having a problem and knowing that she could manipulate Jax into getting rid of that problem.
If Jax wanted to be manipulated by his ex then that was his mistake to make. Lily didn't like it, but she'd put up with it. She would only put up with it when he dealt with Tara on his own time though, not times that club needed him.
Given all these thoughts rolling around in Lily's brain it was no shock that her first instinct as Jax entered the clubhouse was to rush towards him her eyes narrowed and her temper running hot.
"Where in the hell have you been?"
Tig was quick to answer that question apparently just as pissed. "He was at Tara Knowles place."
"What the fuck Jax? We've been waiting on that medical supplies." Lily spat out not backing down for a second.
Jax might be the big bad biker that scared everyone, but that didn't stop her from putting him in his place. He was her brother after all; her stupid older brother.
Piney, nor Opie, nor Chibs, nor Juice, nor the prospect dared to step between Lily and Jax. Lily might just be an old lady but they knew that she could be just as venomous as Gemma when it came to shit like this.
"I know." Jax replied trying his best to back away having already put up with his mother's reaction this morning.
He knew that Lily's reaction would turn out to be just as vicious. She really did take after Gemma.
"You know? Oh you know." Lily snapped unsure if she was ready to scream and explode or just burst into tears and attempt to slap her brother into next week.
Chibs stepped in placing a gentle hand on his old lady's back giving her the gentle push she needed to step back before she did something she might regret.
He stroked Lily's back for a brief moment doing his best to calm his old lady. He was a bit taken back by the way she'd jumped onto scolding Jax the second he'd burst through the door, but Chibs couldn't deny the fact that he was tempted to say all of the things Lily had just said.
Chibs made a silent note to himself to never piss his old lady off enough that she let that kind of fury out on him.
Chibs didn't voice his own annoyance with Jax, choosing instead to update Jax on the Irishman's condition. "The bullet in this guy's arse has hit a major femoral artery. There's nothin else I can do fer him. He needs a doctor and he needs one now."
Jax cringed at this as he replied. "Alright...alright."
He frowned noticing someone was missing from the situation. "Where's Clay?"
"Unser took him in for questioning. The Mayans tried to hit Darby too." Opie answered.
Tig spoke up nodding his head at Jax. "The other charters are headed in. Clay wants to bounce out this Mayan problem with them., before we decide on any retaliation."
"Okay makes sense. Let me know if anything breaks." Jax stated as he began to make his way towards the clubhouse entrance clearly planning on leaving again.
Gemma was quick to step in front of her son speaking before Lily had a chance to. "Where are you going?"
His answer made Lily's skin crawl. "To Find a doctor."
Gemma tried not to flinch at this comment knowing just who this doctor would turn out to be. She maintained her cool as she spoke patting her son's chest. "Okay. Don't ride alone."
"I'll go with him." Opie offered.
Lily did her best not to let out a frustrated groan as Jax and Opie left shutting the door behind them. She was apparently going to have to put up with one of her least favorite people on the planet.
This day couldn't get any worse could it? Unfortunately she had the faintest feeling that it probably would get much worse.
Lily did her best not to pay any attention as Jax returned a few hours later with Dr. Tara Knowles in tow.
Lily sat on a sofa her arms crossed her jaw set tight. She kept her gaze set straight ahead focusing on a fine scratch along the clubhouse's concrete floors.
The other charters had already arrived filling the clubhouse with chatter as the presidents and vps of the other Sons charters visited with one another.
Through the noise Lily heard Tara speak as Gemma opened the clubhouse doors. "Jesus Christ."
Gemma spoke nodding to Juice who had been given the unfortunate task of plugging up one of Cameron's bullet wounds by Chibs. "Little Dutch Boy's keeping the blood dike from bursting."
"Here's some Vancomcylin this'll kill Anything.. Give him two now and then one every four hours." Tara remarked reaching into her med kit and retrieving a large pill bottle before handing it over to Gemma.
Chibs let out a heavy sigh leaving the chapel and shutting the doors behind him.
He glanced over at his old lady able to see that she was beyond livid. He was relieved to see that Jax had made himself scarce. Chibs had a feeling that his old lady wouldn't hold back on taking her rage out on Jax once again if she was given the chance.
Chibs was tempted to go to her, but quickly decided that she might appreciate it if he cleaned himself up a bit first.
He made his way to his dorm going to the bathroom sink. He washed the blood off his hands before ditching the black shirt he'd been wearing into the little plastic laundry basket Lily had given him.
He guessed she'd gotten sick of dodging the dirty laundry that wound up on the floor of his dorm.
He took his kutte off momentarily before sliding on a pale tan hoodie he'd gotten last Christmas. It was something Gemma had made for all the guys. It had the reaper symbol on it along with the words Sons of Anarchy.
Chibs rarely found the need to wear it given Charming's mild weather. He had however found that it was pretty comfortable when he was suffering from a bad headache or a particularly shitty hangover.
At the moment he felt as though he'd been hit hard by a steam roller. So the hangover hoodie would serve him well.
He slid his kutte back on over the hoodie before he made his way back out to the main area of the clubhouse.
He made quick work of sitting beside his old lady burying his face against the nape of her neck.
He spoke his voice slightly muffled his breath hitting her neck. "Please don't wake me till Clay get's back lass."
Lily felt a smile sneak into her stony expression despite her irritation. She wrapped an arm around him resting it against his back as her other hand came up to stroke his messy hair. "Wouldn't your bed be more comfortable and less noisy?"
"If ya get me into bed ya aint getting me back up fer anything love." Chibs remarked lifting his head only slightly so that his words rang a bit clearer.
Lily shook her head continuing to stroke his hair as he spoke again making an attempt to lighten her bad mood. "Thanks fer helpin me out earlier love."
"I didn't do much, just opened gauze packets." Lily remarked choosing to put her focus on straightening his hair instead of thinking about Tara being here.
"Aye it still helped though Snow. Although if anyone told me we were goin to be playin doctor and nurse I would have thought that we'd be alone and we'd be wearin less clothing." Chibs replied still trying his best to cheer her up.
He suceeded this comment causing Lily to let out a small tired laugh. She nodded her head as he rested his face back against the nape of her neck. "We can do that when we get home...once all this shit has calmed down a bit."
She chuckled again as she felt Chibs nip at her neck. It didn't take long for Chibs to fall asleep his body relaxing against her touch his breathing evening out.
Lily continued to hold on to him the hand that had been stroking his hair beginning to stroke his still tense back.
She sighed saying a silent prayer that this shit all calmed down sooner than later.
Apparently someone had been listening to her prayers because Clay had managed to make some sort of deal with Alvarez while he'd been stuck in one of Lily's father's jail cells.
Lily didn't know all the details of this deal, but whatever it was it was apparently good news. Or at least she was guessing it was since a raging party started up the second the Sons and the visiting Sons charters had left the chapel.
Chibs had gone off to talk more business with the Charming Sons which left Lily standing by Gemma by the clubhouse entrance watching the chaos of a Sons party take place in front of them.
Someone had already started a cage match which of course had attracted a huge crowd. Croweaters were everywhere looking to entertain a visiting Sons a few of them probably hoping to land a Son in the process.
One person stuck out like a sort thumb though. Lily tried not to stiffen as she spotted Tara Knowles in the crowd the woman having ditched her bloody scrubs for a pair of jeans and one of Jax's hoodies.
Gemma noticed the tightness in her goddaughter's jaw as she spotted the good doctor and couldn't resist the urge to speak. "What do you think about that shit? Her showing back up in town."
"I don't like it. I don't trust the bitch." Lily remarked unable to stop herself from voicing the truth.
Gemma tried not to grin at this relieved to know that she'd at least taught her goddaughter the common sense her son seemed to lack when it came to Tara Knowles.
Lily spoke again shaking her head. "I don't like her being here one bit at all. I'm thankful for what she did for the club, but like I said I still don't trust her."
Gemma nodded her head in agreement as she spoke. "Couldn't say it better myself sweetheart."
Lily didn't have a chance to reply as Chibs made his way to her his arms wrapping around her waist and his lips sliding along hers.
He spoke only one thing on his mind; sleep. "Come on lass let's go to bed."
Lily raised an eyebrow at this nodding her head towards the raging party. "And miss all this?"
"Aye I can give ya all this any Friday of the week. Righ now I just wanna close my eyes and sleep fer as long as I can with ya by my side." Chibs remarked nodding to Gemma as he drug Lily off towards the clubhouse enterance.
Gemma smiled nodding her head. "Good night sweethearts."
"Night Mom." Chibs replied not giving Lily a chance to respond as he pulled her into the clubhouse.
Right now his bed was calling his name and no one was getting between him and it.
Gemma turned back to keep an eye on Tara as Jax approached her. She had to agree with Lily; she didn't like the bitch and she didn't trust her.
…...
Lily let out a tired giggle as Chibs used what little strength he still had left in him to push her down onto the bed.
She shook her head as he stepped back ditching his clothes and his kutte. He changed into a fresh pair of boxers before he hopped into bed patting the empty side for her.
Lily stripped down to her panties too tired to care about searching for her pjs. She climbed in beside Chibs settling down beside him.
He opened his arms for her allowing her to rest her head against his chest as he spoke. "That's more like it. Way better than a party any day a the week."
Lily let out a sleepy chuckle sighing. "I think I've finally tamed you."
Chibs shook his head his hand beginning to stroke her bare back. "Never could tame me love. I'm jus smart enough to know that laying beside a beautiful woman who's wearin nothin but a thong is better than a party with a bunch of drunk idiots any day of the week."
"You love those drunk idiots though." Lily replied a laugh escaping her lips as Chibs pressed his lips to hers.
He pulled back from the kiss nodding his head. "Aye I do and so do ya."
The couple laid in silence for a short moment before Chibs spoke unable to stop himself. "I gotta ask ya somethin love."
"Okay shoot." Lily remarked doing her best ot keep her eyes open and not give into the temptation of sleep.
Chibs swallowed the lump in his throat trying to think of the best way to bring this up. He'd been bouncing it around in his mind since Lily had gotten the tattoo on her ankle.
Everytime he wanted to bring it up something happened and he never quite got the words out.
Tonight seemed like a good a night as any to finally ask the question though.
"What would ya say if I asked ya to get my crow on ya? I know ya already have the heart on yer ankle, but I want the crow more than ya can imagine." Chibs blurted out shocked as Lily pressed her lips to his.
She spoke a smile crossing her lips as she pulled away from the kiss. "I'd say yes. I absolutely would love to have a crow for you."
He grinned his heart feeling as though it was skipping a beat as he pressed his lips back to hers.
Lily pulled away speaking again. "Where do you want me to get it?"
"Where ever ya want love. I'll jus be happy that ya have it." Chibs replied.
Lily nodded her head already having a place in mind. She spoke a smile still fixed onto her features. "Okay I'll talk to Happy as soon as possible and get this done."
"Why Happy?" Chibs asked a small frown crossing his features. Happy wasn't the only one who did tattoos. In fact some of the guys in the club used a guy downtown that was pretty decent.
Wouldn't it just be easier to book an appointment with that guy?
Lily let out a small chuckle shaking her head. "Happy clearly told me that when I get my crow he's the one doing it. I don't know about you but I wouldn't want to disobey him."
Chibs chuckled nodding his head in agreement. "Aye good point love."
He pressed his lips back to hers his heart not having felt this full in so long. Soon everyone would see that she was all his.
Tara almost jumped out of her skin as she approached the clubhouse's kitchen area the next morning only to hear Gemma's voice sound out. "Good Morning."
Tara turned to face Gemma a coffee cup in hand. She wasn't shocked to see that Gemma looked as put together as she always did even with the mess of last night's party around her.
She was wearing a silky white kimono over her clothing from the day before, sitting back on a stool a cigarette in hand as she watched Tara.
"Good morning." Tara replied turning away from Gemma as she readied her coffee.
Gemma watched her for a few moments before speaking. "Thanks for saving the Irishman. He'd be dead if it wasn't for you."
Tara dared to take a glance at Gemma as Gemma put her cigarette out in the sink. "You're welcome."
Gemma stood from the stool making her way towards Tara. "Can I ask you a question?"
Tara sighed looking up from her coffee. "I'm tired. I'm not really up for a fight right now."
"Not a fight." Gemma replied raising an eyebrow a bit amused that she'd already gotten to Tara without even being slightly unfriendly.
She spoke again a small sigh leaving her lips. "I'm just trying to figure out what's going on. You and Jax are obviously reconnected."
Tara sighed finishing prepping her coffee before she turned to face Gemma. "Honestly I don't know what we are."
Gemma nodded her head a cool smile crossing her lips. "That's what concerns me."
She paused pointing off to the passed out party goers in the main area of the clubhouse. "You're clearly not one of them."
"Glad that's clear." Tara replied turning to face the passed out bodies spread out amongst the room.
She reluctantly turned back to face Gemma as she shrugged her shoulders this entire conversation unnerving her. "I don't know."
Gemma spoke not showing just how pleased she was with this response. "You become his old lady, What's that going to look like? Operating on kids during the day, patching up bullet wounds at night."
Tara let out a huff slamming her coffee cup down. "Okay I get it."
Gemma spoke making her way towards Tara as she turned to leave. "I know you hate me, but this isn't just me being some annoying overbearing bitch. This is someone telling you the truth. You and Jax is a bad idea. And someone better start thinking clearly before both of you get hurt."
Tara felt the stress of what had happened with Kohn the night before last hit her hard with Gemma's words.
She leaned back against the plate glass window separating the kitchen from the main area of the clubhouse as she spoke. "Well it wouldn't be my first bad idea. Shit seems to follow me wherever I go."
Gemma let out a soft sigh before speaking. "You know you are smarter and more strong willed than anyone I've ever met. You need to shine some of that on this situation with Jax and you. He's not smart enough right now to do what's right. He's got too much shit on his plate. You have to be the one to break this off."
She paused nodding her head trying to set this idea into Tara's mind. "You need to save the both of you from something bad"
Tara felt her eyes begin to water Gemma's words setting in.
She didn't have time to reply as they were joined by a third person. It was almost funny Tara had spent all these years thinking of Lily Unser as an awkward thirteen year old girl.
The woman standing before them in One of Chibs' shirts and a pair of jeans along with blue faded house-shoes clearly wasn't that little girl any more. She'd grown into her curves and had grown taller of course. But seeing her stand there with a pack of cigarettes in hand and a hickie clearly visable on her neck made it all too clear just how much she'd grown up to Tara.
Tara couldn't help but to envy Lily looking so at home amongst all of this. Lily pressed a kiss to Gemma's cheek a cheerful smile on her lips. "Morning mom."
"Morning baby." Gemma replied giving Tara a pointed look before leaving the room.
Lily did her best to ignore Tara as he began to prepare herself a cup of coffee.
She tried not to cringe as Tara spoke the woman shaking her head slightly. "I don't get how you can be so...normal in all of this?"
Lily shrugged her shoulders trying her best not to snap at Tara. "How else am I supposed to act?"
Tara sighed unable to stop herself from speaking. "I always envied that about you, you know? You can walk through here with your head held high when total chaos is all around you. It's like this is all just a normal day for you. It's always been like that, you sitting around the clubhouse and the guys not a care in the world."
Lily tightened her shoulders clearly able to see Tara's attempts to bond with her.
She resisted instead just choosing to make a simple statement. "You know what they say what's normal to the spider is chaos to the fly."
Tara shook her head as she watched Lily continue to prepare her coffee and continue to avoid her gaze.
She spoke sighing. "You grew up so much. You've changed so much since the last time I saw you."
"That happens." Lily spat out as she poured her coffee.
Tara flinched at this unable to stop herself from just pulling from this situation. "Why do you hate me so much Lily? We used to be so close."
Lily resisted the urge to slam the coffee pot down as she turned to Tara her gaze darkening. "I hate you for leaving. Did you ever stop to think that when you left Charming that maybe Jax wasn't the only one you abandoned. I don't give a shit that you were just nineteen. You knew what he was back then and you still ran off like a weak little traitor."
She paused glaring at Tara before speaking again her voice venomous. "You destroyed Jax. I love him just like a brother. I sat back and watched him destroy himself for a long time. He's just finally got his shit together. I'm not going to sit back and watch you destroy him again. Once you're weak you'll always be weak."
And with that she left the room leaving a stunned Tara behind.
Tara frowned as she allowed Lily's words to set in. Lily really had changed since she'd last saw her.
She was just like Gemma in all the worst ways possible.
Hey guys I know this chapter was a little shorter than my usual chapters, but I thought it'd be a good way to sink back into the fic for me. I'm sorry about the wait I've been super busy unsuccessfully job hunting and dealing with some other real life stuff. I'm back though a bit slow. I'm going to try to be better about speeding up my updates though.
Anyway I hope you enjoyed this.