Rifiuto: Non Miriena

Thanks to Reader for reviewing 35 and 36.

This loving was slow, gentle; it was a rejoining of two souls after a long absence apart. As they collapsed in each others' arms afterward, Ziva felt a contentment she hadn't felt in days, weeks. Glancing over at her husband, she felt her heart jump as she watched him catch his breath. Shifting onto his side, he tucked his arm under his head and watched her, drinking her in. Slowly, he reached out to trace her features, drinking in the mere fact that they were together again.

She glanced at the clock, but didn't register the time, though she knew it was before five in the morning. "We needed this, Tim. We both did." She moved closer, capturing his lips in a soft kiss. Tim's eyes snapped open midway through the kiss, and he pulled away, taking a deep breath. Her brow furrowed in confusion. "Tim?" But before she could ask again, he'd flipped them over, pushing her into the mattress, holding her arms above her head. "Tim, what are you doing?" Ziva didn't like not knowing where something was going, and this little impromptu surprise was starting to worry her. She loved when Tim took control, but this...

"Did you really think you could just take my children and leave without me coming after you, Ziva?" He growled, moving down to kiss her breasts. Her chest heaved slowly as she tilted her head back and let him take over. He nipped hard on the soft flesh of her breast, one hand sliding down her side to slip between her thighs. He played with the curls of her pubic hair for several seconds, fingers deliberately brushing over the sensitive skin between her thighs and making her jump every so often. She bit her lip, groaning in pleasure as his fingers slid over the sensitive skin before slipping into her.

"If... this is your... idea of torture..." She panted. "It's... working..." She swallowed. He kissed her deeply, enjoying the feel of her arching beneath him. "God, Tim..." He broke the contact, leaving her shaky and staring into his eyes with worry. Those beautiful green orbs of his had darkened to a smoky emerald green, and he leaned down, nipping gently at her ear.

"How dare you think leaving me was for my own good, Ziva." He growled, pushing her back onto the bed and getting up. She took a deep breath and sat up, watching the muscles in his back move as he got dressed. He was so beautiful, and she was so lucky, and she'd thrown it away in a moment of fear.

"Tim, you have to understand-" He turned to face her, pulling his shirt on. As he pulled on the over-shirt and began to button it, he waited, giving her the floor. She stopped, opening her mouth only to close it.

"Understand what, Ziva?" He asked, waiting. When she didn't speak, he continued, adjusting the collar on his shirt. "Understand that you took my children and fled? That you abandoned me? That you left without an explanation, without a reason, without giving me any kind of clue as to where you'd gone or why you'd left?" He made his way to the bed, leaning on it, until they were nose to nose. "That you've done what everyone in my life has done to me except for Penny and Sarah? I've been abandoned most of my life by people who I thought loved me. The last person I expected to be abandoned by was my wife."

Then, he stood, leaving the bedroom. She took a deep breath, realizing that he was right; she'd brought this on herself.

Tim looked up; he was sitting on the back porch, his laptop open in front of him, writing. It was the only thing he could do that he knew would keep him calm and keep him from going even further off the rail than he was. Ziva had left him alone, only stepping out to set a cup of coffee on the table beside him and press a kiss to his cheek with a whispered, 'I love you' that he didn't have the calmness to return just yet.

The sound of small footsteps brought him from his work, and he looked up as Zipporah rushed over to him. Her long black curls were pulled back into two pigtails, and she wore a pair of jeans and a pink top with flowers on it. He pushed his chair back and let her climb onto his lap. The child nuzzled into her father, burying her face in his chest. After a moment, she looked up at him, smiling. Tim's heart tugged; she had Ziva's smile, her beauty... she was innocent in this, like her brothers were. They probably hadn't wanted to leave without Tim, but it had been Ziva's motherly promises that had made them follow. He understood, he really did, he just...

A soft ping! announced someone trying to make a call, and Tim pressed a kiss to his daughter's head, before gently setting her back on her feet. "Go play with your brothers, sweetheart." With a sloppy kiss to her father's cheek, she did as told, and Tim made sure she was out of sight before he accepted. Gibbs and Tony stared back at him, from MTAC.

"Any luck, Tim?" Gibbs asked. Tim sighed, rubbing his face in exhaustion.

"Damn, you look like hell, McScruffy." Tony joked gently, trying to ease some of Tim's tension. He scoffed gently, sitting back in his chair.

"Good to see you too, DiNozzo." He replied. "And no, Boss, not yet. Every lead..." He let his gaze wander to the side, catching sight of someone leaning against the doorframe, one hand stretched out to rest against the other side. "Every lead only leads to a dead end."

"Come home then, Tim. We can restart the search from here and then-"

"No!" Tim's sharp bark cut the former Senior Agent off. "I'm not coming back to the States until I find my wife and children, Tony!" The other man shut up, holding out his hands in surrender. Gibbs just watched, understanding Tim's frustration.

"If Ziva doesn't want to be found, Tim, then you should let her go. Stop searching. But if she wants to be found, you'll find her. It just depends." He nodded, before canceling the call. Slowly shutting the laptop, he turned his gaze to the door.

"You know how hard that was?" He asked, meeting his wife's gaze. Asher clung to his mother's waist, head resting against her small body. The boy watched and listened to the interaction between his parents, sensing something very wrong between the couple, but he kept quiet. His brother and sister were inside, coloring. She reached down with her free hand, stroking her fingers through her son's soft black curls. The boy looked up at her, green eyes searching hers, before resting his head against her again, watching his father.

"Gibbs was wrong, Tim." She said; Asher could feel her words within her chest, could hear the deep, jagged breaths she took as she spoke. "I did not want you to find me, and yet you did." After a moment Asher pulled away and returned inside; he didn't want to see the argument between his parents, and so joined his brother and sister.

"I should have told him, Ziva." She shook her head, narrowing her eyes at him. Then, she let go of the doorframe, hand falling to her side with a soft slap, and headed into the house.

"You cannot beat down my door one minute and expect me to face my old life again the next, Timothy!" Tim got up and followed her, grabbing her by the elbow when he got close enough.

"Hey! Ziva!" She turned back to him, dark eyes narrowing at the feel of his grip on her elbow. "I had to take the call-"

"You did not have to do any of this!" She snapped back. "Why are you here?" He scoffed gently.

"You invited me." She studied his face, studied his eyes, whispering,

"That was before."

"Before what? Before you took my children and fled?" She swallowed, yanking away.

"You should not have come." Then, she turned and headed through the living room, slipping out a side door. Tim sighed, turning to find his children watching silently from the bedroom door.