38: Honey Is For Bees, Silly Bear

Over the course of the month, you had become nearly inseparable from Patrick. For the most part, it felt as if nothing had ever happened between you, that you had been dating the entire time you knew each other. But try as hard as you both did, there was still something a little different between you and you knew that you were the one who caused it. Patrick had tried adamantly to convince you that he had completely forgiven you of anything you may have ever done, but you still caught him staring at you every now and then with an indiscernible look in his eye. You tried to ignore it, but you knew that that look meant that he was still hurt that, not only did you sleep with Alex, but you didn't wait until you were ready. You yourself hated this and it made you feel sick every time you thought of it. And yet, in spite of everything, one other aspect of your relationship with Patrick had changed. You two were closer than ever and he was all the more protective of you. If there was anything that you needed, he was right there to get it for you. If there was anything that you didn't need or want, he'd get it for you just in case. And he was insistent that you take your medication if you felt remotely in pain. He hardly let you do anything on your own, but you didn't mind. You were ecstatic that he was in your life at all, let alone openly in love with you. Most days, Patrick would work on writing new music while you listened. He loved hearing your advice, however unhelpful it was. Most of the time, you were incapable of saying anything other than how much you loved it. Then you'd argue lightly when he said that you were crazy because he wasn't very good. Those little arguments never lasted long and usually ended either when you punched him playfully in the arm or when Pete joined in and finally convinced him to admit that he had at least some talent. It drove both you and Pete absolutely insane that Patrick always thought so little of himself.

A few more weeks later, your cast had been taken off and you were supposed to go back to work the next day. "I'm going to miss just sitting with you all day," you said as you lay with your head on his stomach.

"So don't go," he answered.

You watched your hand in his as he played with your fingers. "I can't do that," you finally answered a minute later.

"Why not?"

"Because…I need a job. Life takes money and I don't have much," you said with a pout.

"You know, I wouldn't object to helping you out while you found a better job or something," he offered.

"I wouldn't dream of asking you to do something like that."

"But you don't mind if Pete helps pay the rent?"

You smiled. "That wasn't my idea."

"But you're still going along with it," he pointed out.

You sighed. "You and your logical reasoning."

"So does that mean you're going to take my offer?"

You frowned slightly. "It wouldn't feel right."

"Julie," he said firmly. "Take the offer."

"I doesn't matter what I say, does it? You're not going to leave me alone until I agree, are you?"

He laughed. "Not at all."

You smiled at him. "Has anyone ever told you that you're too good?"

"Um, guys?!" came a panicked call from Pete. "Guys! I-we need…help. We need…hospital!" he called over a muffled cry from Courtney. Both yours and Patrick's smiles faded and you rushed out of your room towards the living room. Pete was spinning in zigzag patterns through the living room as he rushed to find things he'd forgotten, like his phone, shoes, Courtney's emergency bags, and even Courtney.

"You go get Courtney, I'll calm Pete down," instructed Patrick. You rushed to Courtney and Pete's bedroom to find her holding on to the dresser for support. You pulled her arm over your shoulder to support her the best you could and the two of you made your way awkwardly towards the door.

"I don't know if I can get her to a car by myself," you told Patrick.

He nodded then turned towards Pete. "Just follow us to the car." Pete nodded and Patrick helped you support Courtney.

"Focus on your breathing," you told Courtney all the way to Patrick's car. She tried while nodding then shaking her head in pain.

"It's-not-working!" she said between gasps of breath. Patrick opened the door and you got in the backseat with Courtney while Pete and Patrick sat up front.

"Dude! You have to drive faster!" Pete yelled at Patrick.

"I'm driving as fast as I can, Pete!" he yelled over a scream from Courtney.

"It'll be ok; just focus on your breathing," you coached her.

"Aren't we there yet?" Pete asked. His face had been drained of color.

"We're almost there," Patrick assured him.

"We better-damnwell be-almost-there! This baby's-coming-either-way!" Courtney said through clenched teeth. And so the conversation went for the next few minutes until you had finally reached the hospital. Patrick opened the door and he and Pete helped Courtney out. Pete led her inside while you and Patrick followed. Courtney was seated immediately in a wheelchair and wheeled away by a nurse through a set of double doors. Pete followed closely behind.

You leaned against Patrick. "God, I'm so nervous for her. I can only imagine the amount of pain she must be in right now."

"She'll be fine." He led you to a set of chairs in the waiting room.

"I'm sure, but still…If you think about it, it's like shoving a watermelon through a straw."

Patrick laughed. "I think that's just a small reason why they call it a miracle." You smiled and laced your fingers with his.

"I just hope for everyone's safety that she's not in labor too long. She gets pretty violent when she's in pain, and this is by far the worst pain that she's ever felt." A nurse entered the area through the double doors and you heard yelling from somewhere close behind them.

"Goddamn you, Pete! I fucking hate you! No! Stay with me! I need you! I love you!"

You looked at Patrick with a look of amusement mixed with concern. "Poor Pete," you said. Patrick just nodded. After that, you both fell silent. For the next few hours, you waited anxiously in the waiting room. You rested your head on Patrick's shoulder while he played with your fingers or stroked your hair.

It was after 2 am and you were fighting to stay awake. You were now curled on two armless chairs with your head in Patrick's lap, using it as a pillow. His arm covered yours in attempts to keep you warm against the cool draft in the waiting room. He was running his thumb rhythmically back and forth over the area just above your elbow. Your breathing became shallow and you surrendered to sleep.

It's not what it seems in the land of dreams
Don't worry your head, just go to sleep

What felt like seconds later, you were awoken by the low, whispered sounds of Pete and Patrick's voices. You opened your eyes and sat up. "What's going on?" you mumbled as you stifled a yawn.

"I'm officially a daddy!" Pete announced. He sounded exhausted to the point of passing out, though he was genuinely beaming from ear to ear.

"When?" you asked.

"4:07 in the morning," he answered.

"4:07? What time is it now?"

Patrick looked at his watch. "Just about 5."

"How's Courtney?"

"She's sleeping," answered Pete. You just nodded. "Do you want to see the baby?" he asked with a toothy grin.

"Yeah, of course," answered Patrick. You both stood and followed Pete down a hall, stopping before a large picture window looking into a room with rows of newborn babies swathed in pink and blue blankets. "He's that one, there…farthest left in the row closest to us," Pete said as he pointed.

"You have a baby boy?" you asked.

Pete nodded. "Yeah. His name's Bronx." A nurse came up to the three of you and told Pete that Courtney was asking for him. "I'll be back," he said as he turned to leave.

You and Patrick stood in front of the window, looking at Pete and Courtney's newborn baby boy sleep. "He looks so little, so fragile," you marveled, leaning into Patrick.

He wrapped his arms around you. "But he's beautiful," he inputted softly.

Your heart skipped a few beats at his words. "Have you ever thought about wanting to be a dad?"

Patrick hesitated before finally answering. "I have."

"And?"

He huffed slightly. "If I ever am, I won't be disappointed about it." You said nothing but laced your fingers with his.