Chapter 36- Loneliness Banished.

Rosalie and I get back to the house before the boys do. Esme's face is creased with concern and there are many anxious questions as she sees our wet clothes and notes the fact that we're home early.

"There was an accident at school, "Rosalie says briefly. "We had to hide a body Esme, I'm sorry."

"Oh!" Esme's gentle face is distressed.

Rosalie sniffs at her long hair and makes a face. "That's not the nicest smelling lake in the world- I'm going to have a shower." She vanishes towards her bathroom, leaving me looking guiltily at Esme.

"It was Jasper," I tell her tremblingly. "He didn't mean it, but…"

"Oh Alice, don't worry!" Esme gives me a quick, hard hug. "Oh dear, you're all wet…you should get changed. But I understand how difficult it is. We can talk about it when the boys get back."

I follow Rosalie's lead and take a quick shower, shampooing my hair to get the smell of the lake out of it, scrubbing hard. In my heart I am sure of the Cullen's acceptance of Jasper and I, despite today's setback. What I am not sure about is Jasper- if he is going to be able to acknowledge his failures and accept forgiveness for them.

He is home, sitting on the bed when I return to our room after my shower. I stand in front of him and stroke his hair as he rests his face wearily against my breasts.

"I made a mess of it all today, darlin'," he says soberly.

I place my hands on either side of his face, turning it gently up so that I can look in to his eyes. I have become used to them gold and the red is startling against his pale face, but I don't flinch. "You made a mistake," I say softly. "That's all."

Jasper kisses me, his lips soft and questing against mine as I open my mouth to him. "I love you," I say passionately. "It doesn't matter Jasper, none of it matters, not here…"

He groans and pulls away from me. "Alice…"

I sigh. "Let me get dressed. I know you need to hear it from them, but it doesn't matter here. They're our family now Jasper." I pull on a dress and stockings and shoes while Jasper slumps on the bed. "Come downstairs with me."

Jasper holds my hand as we descend the stairs, moving towards the sound of Edward playing the piano in the living room. Carlisle and Esme are both in there with him, the three of them talking quietly over the light melody coming from the keys, although the conversation stops when we enter.

"Jasper dear, I am sorry," Esme says sympathetically. "I know you must be feeling terrible, but you mustn't be too hard on yourself."

"It's a sad facet of this difficult life we've chosen," Carlisle adds thoughtfully. "That there are times we stumble on the path, and at those times the consequences are profound. But you are trying Jasper, you've resisted countless temptations and you know you can do it, and now you just have to keep trying."

I sit on the sofa, pulling Jasper down beside me. His face is stiff as he listens to Carlisle's gentle words, but he doesn't say anything.

"You're not the only one who's done it." Emmett enters the room and throws himself down on the sofa beside me, reaching across me to cuff Jasper on the shoulder. Rosalie, smelling of expensive soap and hair products now, not lake water, follows him into the room and sits beside him. Emmett wraps a protective arm around and cradles her close.

"You're not the only one who's done it," Emmett repeats, more seriously this time. "Being surrounded by that temptation all the time…it happens. Trust me, I know and when it was me I felt like shit about it, but you have to let it go." He makes a face at Rosalie. "We just have to try and minimise the repercussions."

"We've done that," Rosalie adds practically. "Alice has seen it- the body will be found but there'll be no evidence of how he really died. It will be ruled a drowning." She looks at me with a wry smile.

Carlisle looks pained, and Esme pats his hand with a comforting look.

"I appreciate all you've done for me today," Jasper says, his southern accent very strong in his slow, considered words. "But I cannot allow you to take responsibility for my failings in this way again."

Rosalie raises her eyebrows at me, and I sigh and take Jasper's hand. "Jasper my darling, please don't do this."

He raises my hand to his mouth and places a kiss on the back of my hand. "Alice…"

"No." I say firmly, looking pleadingly around at everyone. "You have to understand Jasper, that this is our family now. What's done to help each other isn't done out of obligation, but out of love, because we belong together. All of us."

"Alice is right," Carlisle says in his measured way. "Jasper, you and Alice have added a breath of fresh air and a new layer of strength and caring to this family. We want you here because of who you are, whatever that takes."

Jasper shakes his head. "I'm not able to do what you all do, not yet. I should not have attended school when even I can tell my control is so tenuous. I cannot continue to put the safety and secrecy of the family at risk with my own unpredictability."

I can tell how much effort it takes him to get out these words, and I hate myself for pushing him beyond what he is really ready for. "I'm sorry," I say to him contritely. "This is all my fault. I should have known, and not been so wrapped up in doing what I wanted to do to think about you."

"So what are you saying Jasper?" Rosalie says directly, cutting across me. "You made a mistake…yes, we know. What would you have us do? Crucify you for it? It's not as though what's been done can be undone."

Emmett touches her mouth with his fingers. "Go easy baby."

She shakes him off. "I just want to get to the point! We can sit here navel gazing and introspective all night, or we can just deal with the facts." Rosalie looks at Jasper, half defiantly. "You killed someone. It was a mistake, you're sorry, and Alice and I have fixed it so it won't come back onto the family. Because you are part of the family now, and damned if I'll let you take yourself and my sister away just when we've found each other because you have some warped idea about responsibility."

The silence is broken by Edward playing a soft note on the piano and laughing gently. "Tell us how you really feel, Rosalie," he says teasingly, and his eyes on her are bright with affection.

Rosalie stiffens defensively at his words, but seeing the amusement in Edward's face she relaxes again, smiling at him angelically. "Not all of us like to wallow in inner torment Edward!"

Jasper raises his eyebrows at Rosalie, who meets his gaze frankly. "I mean it Jasper," she says. "You and Alice are Cullens and part of this family now."

"And we take care of our family," Esme puts in gently, her face soft as she looks around. "We've made a family from strangers, but the bonds are real Jasper."

"This isn't an easy life we've all chosen," Carlisle says thoughtfully. "Maintaining our essential humanity in the face of vampirism is a constant challenge, but I think that the family we've made together is key to our success. The love and support of a family…well, you've felt it Jasper. You told me how it feels to you here."

"I don't wish to go away," Jasper says. "You are right about the family Carlisle, and the way it feels to be part of this- I do want that." His eyes light on me, and he touches a fingertip to my nose with a loving smile. "And Alice wants this…you deserve everything, darlin', and I wouldn't take you away from anything that makes you so happy as you are here." He hesitates. "I need to be honest though, and I don't believe that school is possible for me. Not yet. It's too much, too constant…"

"That's my fault for pushing it," I say guiltily. "I forget that it really hasn't been so long for you. It's only been a year and a half of even trying to resist and abstain, coming after a long time of following your instincts every day. It took me longer than that."

"The more human blood you drink, the stronger the desire for it grows," Edward says. "I was vegetarian from the start with Carlisle, but then there came a time where I explored the darker side…it was harder to go back to denying myself after indulging than it was to go without at the start."

"Fuck," Emmett mutters irreverently. "I'd better never go feral…I'll never get control back if it's any harder than it was!"

Everyone laughs a little, and I can feel hope burgeoning in my heart. I look at Jasper, my eyes sparkling. "We don't have to go to school. We don't have to do anything you don't want to."

Jasper's beautiful crooked smile lights up his face as he looks at the family that surrounds us. "I do want to make this work," he admits.

"You just need time," Carlisle says with an encouraging smile. "And if there's one thing we have in abundance it's time!"

I giggle. "We won't go to school, you and I. We'll stay home and learn and play here."

"I can teach you to cook," Esme teases me. "I might be a little rusty after all this time, but I ran a human household once upon a time and I do know how to cook!"

I clap my hands. "See…who needs school?"

Jasper's grin is genuine, and it widens into a laugh as Edward plays a jaunty little tune on the piano and says to Emmett, "Don't worry Emmett…Rosalie and I can make you keep up your French lessons. It wouldn't do at all for you to miss out on something you're so passionately fond of."

Emmett growls in mock rage and dives for him, and then there's the crashing of vampire bodies as the two of them go rolling off the piano bench and Esme implores them to go outside before they break something. Jasper seizes them both by the scruffs of their necks and drags them through the French doors on to the porch and then down onto the lawn, where the three of them became nothing more than a blur of laughing, wrestling brotherhood.

I skip lightly out onto the porch after them, watching my beloved and my brothers play. Behind me I hear Carlisle's low chuckle and Esme's answering giggle, and Rosalie's amused snort as she watches the boys with me. My family,I think exultantly. My family…they're here, and I'm here with Jasper, and I am never going to be alone or lonely ever again. Finally, I'm here where I belong.

A moment later Jasper is standing in front of me, dirt on his clothes and his blonde hair dishevelled, smiling up at me with all the love in his heart glowing in his eyes. I trace my fingers across his face and gently press my lips against his. With you in waking and dream shall I be… The words echo in my head, as they have done for so many years, strengthening my faith in this man and his love and the life we will share together. Jasper has always been there, in my shadow world of visions and dreams and prophecy, and now he is here in the real world, and I am content. I am yours and you mine.

A/N- So that's the end of how I envision Alice's story- happy and content with her Jasper and a vital part of her Cullen family!

I want to say a big and genuine thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read, review or pmail me while I've been writing this story. I love talking about what I'm writing and it's truly flattering when someone reads and enjoys what I'm doing. I've also really appreciated the encouragement while I've been writing this one because it didn't always come easily. Alice's visions are hard to work with! And I admit, I've always been an Emmett-and-Rosalie kind of girl, lol….Alice and Jasper were a whole new territory for me.

I have just posted a one-off Jasper POV of his last days as a human (The Major's Last Ride), when he was a soldier in the Confederate army. It was an outtake for this story, since I originally had a different idea about what I was going to write. I've also started writing a new long fic, taking a big time jump from Alice's world to write about Renesmee in a post Breaking Dawn world- if you want to read about that you could put me on author alert so you'll get a note when I start posting that.

Once again, thank you to everyone who read, reviewed or pmailed. And of course, all honours to Stephenie Meyer who gave us the characters and the Twilight universe to play with in the first place!