AN: Thanks to Iluvdolphins for generously posting this idea on the IPS forum's fanfic thread. It really fit here and I hope I've done it justice.

Albuquerque, we have a problem

Chapter 38 – Thongs Get Complicated

They made a strange group wandering around the mall; Mary, Carol and Marshall.

Mary and Carol were of an age so could easily be accepted as friends despite their differences in physical appearance. Carol barely reached Mary's shoulder when they stood together and her diminutive stature was even more apparent when she stood next to Marshall. Her attitude to shopping was evident in the way she practically bounded around the stores, touching every item regardless of whether she intended to buy it or not. Mary kept up with her frantic shopping style, vicariously enjoying the pleasure the other woman got out of having someone shop with her, even if she didn't enjoy the experience itself.

Marshall trailed behind the two women unenthusiastically. He was bored. Every so often Mary would shoot him a look and he'd either reward her with a patient smile if she was being good or an encouraging nod if that seemed to be required. They asked his opinion and rolled their eyes when he failed to provide a satisfactory answer. Mary's eye roll always included a glimmer of amusement at his discomfort. His payback came in the form of Mary's slightly panicked glances as she struggled to play the role of Carol's supportive girl-friend, a role she had never been comfortable with or had much experience at.

For his own part, he played the part of a dutiful partner, but he couldn't relax in such a crowded environment, the constant threat of danger didn't let him. He was alert for potential trouble from several directions; from Mary as she interacted with the world, from the world if it decided to attack their witness or from overeager sales assistants trying to sell him the world.

The third time the assistant brought into their play acting and assumed he was married to one of the women he accompanied, he decided to have a little fun and rather than correcting him simply said, "Wives, actually," with a self satisfied grin.

The second time he amended in the plural, Carol caught him and stared at him in horror.

Marshall just shrugged and told her with a small smile, "What? I'm a guy. We're genetically programmed not to like shopping. I have to get my kicks somehow."

Carol looked surprised. The WITSEC inspectors in charge of her case in Rhode Island wouldn't have recognised a joke if it jumped out and attacked them. And if it had, they would likely have shot it where it stood rather than let it get away and risk it causing someone, somewhere to laugh. She had assumed all US Marshals were the same so was pleasantly surprised that Mary was smiling wryly at her partner as he stood there with an evil gleam in his eye.

"I don't think you can blame your genes for the fact you're not having fun. It's more likely to be the fault of the alcohol from last night," Carol told him, having caught him taking painkillers for his hangover.

"Actually, studies have shown that men and woman have different physiological responses to shopping. In women, the act of purchasing an item stimulates the pleasure centres of the brain in much the same way sex does..."

"Typical man, always got sex on the mind..." Carol laughed.

Mary tried not to blush as the concepts of Marshall and sex were linked in her brain causing a sudden flood of images from the previous night. She turned away and looked at the display before her as something caught Carol's eye across the other side of the store making her hurry off. Mary regained her composure and followed.

As she passed Marshall leaning casually on a shelf she couldn't resist asking, "What did I do to get upgraded to a pretend wife?"

Marshall fell into step a pace behind her and leant down to whisper in her ear, "I can think of a couple of things last night."

xxx

By lunch time Carol had completed most of her shopping, much to the relief of Mary and Marshall.

They were making their way to the food court when Carol stopped suddenly, causing the marshals to do a double take and a quick survey of the crowd, checking for potential threats.

"Can we just stop in there?" Carol asked, indicating the shop she had come to an abrupt halt outside of.

"Do we have to?" Marshall all but whined.

"Dan's been so down lately, I'd really like to get a little something for him. You know, to cheer him up."

"That's nice of you," Mary said as she eyed the store warily.

Carol took that for consent and boldly lead the way, not hearing Marshall's muttered protest of "Oh, God."

Carol stopped at the main display in the doorway, giving her protectors a chance to catch up with her and so that she could get her bearings. Disregarding the sections for everyday day underwear she homed in on the fancy lingerie then wove her way deeper into Victoria's Secret.

Mary's eyes boggled at the selection of sexy lingerie available.

She had a few pairs of lace panties left over from her dating days, but hadn't felt the need to buy anything other than comfortable and functional since she had got serious with Raph. He hadn't seemed to care what she wore, but then she had never kept them on long once things got going between them. Now she could attest to the fact underwear design had come a long way since she had last seduced someone.

She picked up a particularly flimsy set thrown carelessly on the display table and turned them around in her hands, trying to work out which way was 'up'. She looked at Marshall, her usual source of support and help in these situations, but was surprised to find him deliberately avoiding eye contact with her, anyone else in the store and any item on display.

Carol came to her rescue, "They're crotchless," she said as she turned them to their correct orientation.

"Why?" Mary asked, puzzled by the entire concept.

Carol shrugged, "Ask him," she said nodding in Marshall's direction to where he was trying not to get caught looking at a black lace thong.

Mary considered this a moment.

"Hey, Marshall, crotchless panties. Yes or no?" she called across the shop.

Marshall turned a very satisfying shade of red as he pretended not to know her, although his reaction clearly identified him as Marshall to the few women in earshot of Mary's question.

Carol laughed and continued searching for something her husband would like. Mary also continued viewing the items, occasionally giving Carol an opinion on a set she held up or asking for one herself as she discovered that not all sets were horrendous.

She kept half an eye on Marshall, amused by his reactions to the underwear and her thoughts turned to a conversation from long ago. Something about an invitation to a fantasy, she couldn't remember exactly what he had said other than he had indicated his approval of this particular use of lace and elastic. She watched him move around the store, trying not to get in the way of the women unashamedly holding panties against themselves and seeking others thoughts on design and material. She noticed him not looking at several pairs of panties and that he seemed to return to one pair and not look at them more than the others.

She made her way over to the panties he was being so careful not to show any interest in, meandering through the shelves to make it look like coincidence that she ended up there. Her nearing presence drove him away from the stand so she could look unhindered at whatever had caught his attention.

They were tiny.

The merest sliver of black lace in the shape of a thong.

She mentally prepared ways in which to mock him mercilessly about his taste in underwear when something caught her eye. She looked at them more closely, there was silver thread running through the lace, so that it almost sparkled in the right light.

She turned them over in her hands. Actually, they weren't bad. They were really quiet pretty, but not in an overly girly way. The more she looked, the more she could see herself wearing these and feeling sexy and elegant in them. She found herself digging through the pile to find a pair in her size. She glanced at Marshall before pulling out the correct pair and was relieved to find him being distracted by Carol as she solicited a man's opinion from him. Mary grabbed the panties and randomly selected a few others from the table so she could disguise her purchase and headed over to Carol to see if she had found what she wanted.

Marshall raised an eyebrow as he saw Mary carrying a selection of panties.

"What?" she demanded, "I need new underwear. It seems stupid not to get it while I'm here!"

"Did I say anything?" he asked when she had finished defending her right to shop.

Carol broke into their bickering to show Mary her choices and they made their way to the checkout.

As their purchases were rung up, Marshall tried to get a look at what Mary had chosen. He had seen her near the panties he'd been trying so desperately not to imaging Mary in, at least not until he was alone and could give his imagination free reign. He knew she would never wear something like that and if she did, the chances of him seeing her in them were slim, even after last night.

His view was obstructed by Mary and his attempts at clearing his line of sight were beginning to draw attention from the girl at the till.

He persisted and finally managed to catch sight of a flash of silver as the girl scanned the barcode.

He stared at Mary.

Had she really bought them?

Had she just taken a liking to them?

Or had she known that he'd been looking at them?

If she had seen him looking, that opened up the startling possibility she had bought them for him.

Marshall quickly crushed that hope. Her fiancé had just left her. She had probably brought them just to feel sexy. If she had given it that much thought. He wouldn't be surprised if she had just grabbed several pairs of panties without really looking at them. There was no way she could have known his preference and there was even less chance his opinion would have affected her choice.

He'd just managed to convince himself of this when Mary turned and saw him watching as the girl packed her choices. She glanced at the bag just as the thong was going in and turned back to Marshall making sure she caught his eye.

She gave him a shrug and half smile, a sentiment of what's a girl to do? with a hint of I couldn't resist being conveyed silently between the partners, leaving Marshall wondering if his initial assessment was more accurate than his subsequent rationalisation.

xxx

It was as they were unloading Carol's purchases from the back of Marshall's car that two things happened.

The first was that Marshall's phone rang and he moved away to answer it meaning he didn't hear the conversation between the two women, which was the second thing.

Mary was dragging one of the fold up chairs out the trunk when her curiosity got the better of her and she asked, "What are the chairs for? I thought you had some."

Carol pulled the other chair out the trunk and leant it against the car.

"I do. There are four for the dinner table, but I'll need six tomorrow," she told Mary.

"Who else have you invited?" Mary enquired, surprised that Carol would have made friends in Albuquerque quickly enough to be comfortable inviting them over for Thanksgiving and concerned she may have asked someone from her former life.

Carol looked at her puzzled, "You and Marshall, of course."

"Huh?"

"I'm sure I mentioned it. I wanted to thank you for taking me out today. You didn't have to do that and I know neither of your really enjoyed it, but I had great fun. It's so nice to go out without the kids for a while and have some grown up company. So I wanted to thank you and what better way than to invite you to Thanksgiving? I know there are rules about accepting gifts etc, but surely a home cooked meal isn't prohibited?"

Mary couldn't recall any rule about not accepting invitations to dinner other than those concerning who paid. She was forced to concede that it probably wasn't against WITSEC regulations.

"Good!" Carol exclaimed, "So, you'll come then?"

Mary nodded reluctantly, unable to think of a reason not to go, then picked up the chairs and carried them into the Lerner's apartment.

When she returned, Marshall was just hanging up the phone.

"How'd you get out of carrying anything?" she called to him as she opened the car door.

"Are we done?"

His phone call must have lasted longer than he thought if Mary and Carol had carried all the goods into the apartment and said goodbye.

"Yeah," Mary confirmed, waiting for him to get in the car.

"Who was on the phone?" she asked as he pulled his door closed and reached for his seatbelt.

"Brandi," he said, then waited for the fallout.

"What did she want?" Mary was immediately wary.

"She wanted to know if you were ever going to go home and more specifically if you'd be home tomorrow."

"What did you tell her?"

"That I'd make sure you were there for dinner!" he told her with a smug grin.

"Holy hell, Marshall, tell me you are joking!"

"Nope."

"I've just agreed to have Thanksgiving with the Lerners. There's no way I can manage two family get togethers."

"Three, actually," he reminded her.

"What?" she squeaked.

"We agreed to go to Darren's as well," he said, flinching slightly as he prepared to hit with something.

"Why the hell did we agree to that?"

Marshall just grinned and turned the car toward their next destination...