A/N: Argh...this chapter hated me, too. D: Not to mention I had a bunch of distractions getting in the way. I just got through some horrible final exams, which involved writing six essays in three days, so I kind of felt all written out. XD This chapter's a little shorter than usual, but I figured I'd post it instead of taking like three weeks just to get that extra thousand words. :P
Anyway! Time for moar Kratters. At least the beginning of this chapter was fun to write. :D
Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia or any of its awesome characters.
The auburn haired seraph seemed to take no real interest in us, instead turning to Yuan. His lips turned down in a slight frown, as Yuan crossed his arms with clear annoyance.
"What are you doing here?" the Renegade leader asked immediately.
"Lord Yggdrasill has summoned you, Yuan," Kratos replied, and then looked over to Pronyma. "Leave, both of you. There has been a change in plans."
"What about the Chosen, my lord?" Pronyma asked, sending a cold glance in our group's direction.
"Leave her for now," the seraph answered.
"Hmph...very well," Yuan said, swiftly concealing his irritation. He sent one final glance at Lloyd, before walking over to Pronyma and revealing his wings.
Holy crap...it just never got old, did it? Yuan and Kratos' wings were amazing. As Yuan stood there, a bright spot of light began to glow beneath him, and then he and Pronyma disappeared in a flash. I assumed that they had warped back to Derris-Kharlan. If Colette could learn that angelic warping ability at some point, it would be very useful. As I was busy mulling over that prospect, I saw the others exchange surprised looks at Yuan being an angel as well.
And so, it was down to just us and Kratos. To say that the atmosphere was tense would have been a severe understatement; what made it even worse was the fact that it all seemed to be one-sided. I wasn't sure if it was just acting, but Kratos was looking completely unfazed.
My stomach curled in on itself, and I clenched my fists. Why? Why did it have to be this way? I had known it was going to happen, but...but that didn't make it hurt any less! Kratos was supposed to be back on our side in the end; that was kind of hard to believe, though, when he was standing right there and giving us such an indifferent look despite what he had done to us. It was like telling a high schooler that none of their present problems would matter once they grew older. It made sense, but as human beings we only saw what was currently right in front of us. The future was never a certainty, so it was hard to place so much faith in it.
We wouldn't be getting Kratos back on our side until very far in the future...I hated this. If this was all a charade to keep Cruxis fooled, couldn't there be some sort of sign to reassure me that it was so? I saw that Cruxis uniform, and everything within me boiled with anger. It was the symbol of everything that stood between us, and Kratos knew it. That was why he was wearing it. He wanted us to hate him, didn't he?
Finally, the silence became too much. Lloyd stepped forward from his spot beside me, and I could tell he was trying not to tremble with rage.
"Kratos," he spat. Although he looked angry, I could see the bitterness behind it.
After a moment of thought, I understood that Lloyd felt exactly the same way I did. We were upset...but no matter what Kratos did, we were never going to hate him. Lloyd probably despised himself for that fact. It was just too hard, though. The image of the mercenary we had spent our days with was too ingrained in our heads. We hadn't known each other for that long, but Kratos had helped me through some of the most difficult times of my life. I was sure Lloyd could say the same.
He was a bastard...but at least back then, he had been our bastard. Now we couldn't even say that much.
"Hmph," was Kratos' grunted reply. "Lloyd. Why have you come to Tethe'alla?"
"I came here to save Colette," Lloyd replied defiantly. "Why else?"
"And what good do you believe saving the Chosen will do?" Kratos challenged. "The relation of the two worlds vying for each other's mana will not change."
"But leaving Colette as she was would have just made her a target for you and the asshole brigade," I said, speaking up.
A glare from Kratos suggested that he didn't appreciate my creative use of language, but I no longer cared. The wound he had given me in the Tower had left a permanent scar, one that I would carry with me back home to Earth; a scar that I would never, ever be able to explain even to my family. That scar was going to haunt me for the rest of my life. I had a feeling Kratos would live if I could no longer be silenced with his infamous glares.
"Besides," I continued, "just because we're here for Colette doesn't mean we've forgotten about everything else. We're not planning on just waltzing on home after this, you know. Something has to change or history will just repeat itself."
"Is that so?" Kratos watched me, his gaze scrutinizing as ever. "Changing a system that has been in place for thousands of years is no easy task. You may think that the Journey of Regeneration has prepared you for hardship, but I assure you, that was nothing compared to the difficulties that surely lie ahead."
I grimaced. Thanks a lot for telling me what I already know, Kratos. That nasty truth never got any easier to hear. Things only ever got worse on this goddamn journey.
"I don't care," Lloyd spoke up. "Brittany's right; something has to change. We'll do whatever it takes...even if it means we'll have to fight you again." He looked down, his face darkening at that thought. Then he met Kratos' eyes once more.
"I swear," he said, "we're going to change this twisted system!"
Kratos watched us for a moment, and I thought I saw the shadow of a smirk pass across his face. It was there, and then it was gone. He turned away from us, his wings bursting out from his back in a brilliant flare of sapphire.
"Heh...well, do your best."
Just as he was about to leave, Raine stepped forward.
"Kratos, one more thing."
He at least had the courtesy to pause, and looked over his shoulder at the Professor. Her stern blue eyes were calculating for a moment, and she watched him carefully.
"What does Cruxis want with Brittany?"
I jerked a little at that unexpected question, looking over at Raine in surprise. Then I looked over at Kratos, and saw with dismay that he had been watching my reaction more than he had been watching the Professor herself. What did he see in my expression? I remembered him telling me that my acting sucked, so I suspected that he could probably read me like a book by now.
The auburn haired seraph considered us for another moment, before turning to face us once more. Was he actually going to answer that question? I already had an idea of what was going on from Yuan, but I was curious to see what Kratos had to say on the subject. I was pretty sure he had been kept in the dark during the regeneration journey, but he was clearly educated on the topic now.
"I think that is something you should be able to piece together on your own, Miss Sage," he replied, his eyes moving over our group as he spoke. "I suggest you start your investigation at the source of the issue. Unless you truly believe that Brittany has not yet recovered from her amnesia?"
I saw Lloyd stiffen at that, but I was pretty sure I went paper white. This was bad...now I no longer had the option. I had to tell everyone the truth. Despite my exhaustion, I felt a fresh adrenaline rush, brought on by my sudden feeling of panic.
"What are you talking about?" Sheena's eyes narrowed. Zelos and Raine were both giving me similar looks, probably yelling "Ha! I was right!" in their heads right about now. Only Raine looked more disappointed in me than upset.
Kratos raised an eyebrow at that. "Hmph...I have nothing more to say. If you wish to know the truth...then you will have to sift through the lies beforehand."
And then, before we could say anything further, he took to the air. We watched in complete silence as he flew off, vanishing out of sight. I had a very distinct sinking feeling in my stomach. Sift through the lies...from the way Kratos spoke, I had a feeling he knew far more about me than I wanted him to know. I sincerely hoped he had kept that information to himself.
As for now...
"That guy..." Genis scowled, breaking the silence. "He was just trying to turn us against Brittany, wasn't he?"
I stared at the ground, silent. I could feel Lloyd's eyes on me; he knew that if I didn't come clean now, I never would.
"But what did he mean?" Colette wondered aloud, looking over at me. "Brittany, you haven't recovered from your amnesia, right?"
My uneasiness was actually starting to give me a sense of vertigo, reminiscent of that evening right before the fateful trip to the Tower. They had all helped me then, each offering their own comfort without prying too much. Even Colette had come to talk to me, even though she had been the one suffering most of all.
"...Ugh," I finally said. "Lloyd, help."
"Now?" he questioned me quietly, and I nodded.
"Kratos pretty much just blew my cover," I replied in a quiet groan. "I'd might as well tell the truth before everyone starts speculating." Even though a few of them had probably been speculating for a while now.
"Brittany?" Sheena watched me with wide eyes. "Hold on, what are you saying? You've been lying to us?"
I smiled thinly. They weren't going to be happy with me either way. "Oh, yeah. Big time."
Raine's eyes narrowed, as Genis looked at me with sudden suspicion. "Explain," she said.
"Well, make yourselves comfortable," I said with a sigh, taking a seat on the rocky mountaintop. "This might take a little while. Plus, you're going to want to either put me in a straitjacket or throw me off the mountain by the time I'm finished, so you might want to brace yourselves."
"They're going to believe you," Lloyd assured me in a quiet voice, gripping my shoulder.
"What part are you playing in this, Lloyd?" the Professor asked, frowning.
Lloyd winced for a moment, hearing her tone; that was the tone she used when he was about to get kicked. Then he seemed to gather his resolve, and looked around at everyone.
"Look, guys, I'm sorry...but I promised I wouldn't say anything until she was ready. We were going to tell you everything right after we got the Rheairds..."
"Like I said, get comfortable," I repeated myself. "I'm about to explain what I remembered when I recovered from my amnesia."
Everyone either took a seat or found a more comfortable position in some manner, all of them glancing between me and Lloyd with some form of curiosity or suspicion. They trusted Lloyd, but I guess some of them were kinda pissed at him for keeping my secret. Man...I hadn't meant to get everyone angry at him.
"When did this happen?" Raine asked me. Well, here we go again...
"Right after I became a prisoner at the Asgard Ranch," I replied. "Everything came back to me then."
"You've known all this time? That was months ago!" Genis exclaimed.
"Why didn't you tell us?" Colette asked, and I shook my head.
"Who I am and where I'm from...it's one hell of a story, and it's not exactly a believable one. I was scared you guys wouldn't believe me...no, I'm still scared."
"Brittany..." Lloyd murmured.
"I'm okay," I lied to him, and then turned to the others. "Look, just let me explain without interruption, all right? You can save all your questions and comments for afterwards."
"All right," the Professor said, "we're listening."
When I determined that everyone was in fact doing just that, I began. Though I still felt rather uneasy with Zelos there, I just made a point of not looking at him as I spoke.
And so I told them, with Lloyd filling in for me whenever I faltered or hesitated. I told them about how I was from Earth, a technologically advanced world that existed without mana or magitechnology. I explained what had happened the day I had been taken to Sylvarant, how I had fallen unconscious after nearly crashing my car. Then I recited everything that Yuan had told me about Cruxis' plans, about my Exsphere, and about the Angelus Project.
When I finished, it was uncomfortably silent. Everyone watched me with mostly unreadable expressions, which caused Lloyd and I to start fidgeting. Soon the quietness became too much for me to handle; I heaved a sigh.
"Well? If you don't believe me, you'd might as well break the bad news to me so we can move on with our lives," I said.
"You mentioned that this world of yours has no mana. How is such a thing possible?" Raine voiced the same question that Lloyd had, when I had first told him.
I shrugged. "Things just work a lot differently there. There's no magic, or summon spirits, or elves, or any of that."
"It's all humans?" Genis asked, his eyes widening.
"Mmhmm," I confirmed. "Over six billion of us."
Everyone visibly faltered at that, even Lloyd; that was information I hadn't told him before.
"Yup, Earth's kind of big," I said. "And a tad overpopulated in some places. We've pretty much dominated the environment."
"I'm still finding this difficult to believe," the Professor said, as I had expected her to.
"Then don't believe me," I replied. "Just don't expect me to give you another explanation, because I can't. I've told the truth, and you'll find that all the evidence supports it, no matter how crazy it all is."
"Professor..." Lloyd murmured.
"We believed Sheena because she had proof of her origins," Raine said. "Can you say the same for yourself?"
I shook my head. "No...I don't have anything convincing, anyway. I guess I could use my knowledge of computers and technology as proof, but then you guys could just say that I'm from Tethe'alla or something." I paused for a moment, thinking, and then let out a sigh. "Both the Renegades and Cruxis know about me, but we're not exactly on speaking terms with either of them, so I don't think we could waltz up to them and ask them to back up my story."
"Look, guys..." Lloyd spoke up, frowning. "Who cares if she has proof? She's been with us for long enough that we know we can trust her, right? Why would she lie about something like this?"
"You say we can trust her, and yet she has lied to all of us about her origins from the very beginning," Raine pointed out. Lloyd winced.
"I did the same thing," Sheena said. "I didn't tell you guys anything about my origins for a while, either. I know what it's like...I wasn't sure if you guys would believe me, either."
I sent Sheena a grateful look, but I still wasn't sure if she even bought my story. I still couldn't tell how everyone felt about what had been said; the only person I knew was on my side was Lloyd.
"Well, you said your world is different because it doesn't have mana, right?" Colette spoke up, looking thoughtful. "And you're different because you don't need mana. So all you'd have to do to prove it is release all of the mana in your body!"
"Colette..." Genis sighed. "I don't know if that's such a good idea. If she's lying, she'll die."
"I'm not lying, and I wouldn't die," I said. "But...Yuan said I'd live if I lost all the mana in my body, but he didn't say that I'd be perfectly fine, either. For all I know, I could get really sick or something."
"I know!" Colette brightened again. "We could get the Rheairds back, and-"
"No, apparently that doesn't work," Lloyd said glumly. "Something about mana links..."
"That's right," Sheena said. "The two worlds are connected by mana links, and the Rheairds use that connection to break through the dimensional fissure. If the mana links disappeared, we wouldn't be able to go between the worlds."
"Yeah," I added. "Earth's not connected the way Sylvarant and Tethe'alla are. It's a separate world entirely."
"How did Yggdrasill manage to get over to your world, then?" Genis brought up the question that had been asked before, and I shook my head.
"I asked Yuan, but he said it wasn't important. Even though it kind of was," I said, rolling my eyes. "He's still hiding some stuff from me, I think."
"Hmm...and we can't ask him, either. He's obviously not on our side," Sheena remarked. She looked thoughtful for a moment, and then shrugged. "Well...whatever. It doesn't really add up, but I trust you, Brit. If you say you're telling the truth, then I believe you."
I hesitated at that, my eyes widening a little. There it was again...that almost blind faith. What had I ever done to deserve such good friends? Sheena...actually trusted me. She trusted me enough to believe a story that my own parents would have laughed at, had they been in her position.
"Well..." Zelos spoke up for the first time, and everyone looked over at him. "There is one thing we could do."
"And what would that be?" Raine asked.
"My little spitfire here has knowledge of technology that doesn't even exist in Sylvarant, right?" Zelos said, giving me a sidelong glance. "If she's lying, then she's gotta be from Tethe'alla. Her birth records should be in the Meltokio Archives."
"The Meltokio what?" Lloyd asked, looking confused. I was wondering the same thing. Unless I had missed something in the game, I was pretty sure whatever Zelos was talking about had never been mentioned.
"The Meltokio Archives," Sheena said, her eyebrows raised. "That's not a bad idea, Zelos." She turned to us. "The Archives keep a copy of the birth certificate of every person in Tethe'alla, with the exception of Mizuho. It's for the census they do every ten years."
"What if she's from Mizuho?" Colette asked, tilting her head.
"No, I know for a fact that she's not," Sheena replied. "We're kind of a tight-knit community. Anyway, everyone in Tethe'alla has several copies of their birth certificate scattered around, and the Archives are heavily guarded; it's virtually impossible to completely erase the evidence of your existence. If Brittany's telling the truth, then we won't find her birth certificate anywhere."
"What if she was born in Sylvarant, but has been to Tethe'alla?" Genis spoke up.
Oh, man...this was starting to make my head hurt. Why couldn't they be like Lloyd and Sheena and just believe me? Well...okay, maybe after the whole Kratos thing, they were a little wary. Still...ugh.
"...I don't think that's the case," Raine said after a brief hesitation.
"Why not, Raine?" her brother asked.
The Professor frowned. "...Before I decided to take Brittany on as a student, I administered a quiz to test her general knowledge."
"Oh, I remember seeing her take that," Lloyd said. "But what does that have to do with anything?"
"She failed," Raine replied. "She did well on every section except for history. She couldn't answer questions about Sylvaranti history that even Lloyd would have known. I suspect that before she met us, she had never been to our world before."
"Nngh..." I let out a quiet groan, rubbing my forehead. "Can we just check the Archives, then, guys? All this discussion is giving me a headache..."
"Yeah," Lloyd added. "We should get off this mountain before it gets dark, anyway."
"Current time: 4:15 pm. Approximately four hours and thirty minutes until sundown," Presea suddenly spoke, startling me. "Descent will be hazardous in darkness."
"P-Presea's right," Genis agreed. "We sh-should worry about all of this later, right Presea?"
"...Yes."
"Very well," the Professor said. "Let's get moving, then."
We all stood up, and after a quick check to make sure no one was wounded from the fight we'd just been in, we started back down the mountain. I felt kind of awkward, because I wasn't sure who really believed my story or not, and it still looked like most of the group was mulling over it. Rather than walk in silence, I decided to bring up a new subject.
"Colette," I said, catching up with the blonde Chosen. "How are you feeling? Is everything back to normal?"
"That's right," Lloyd spoke up, remembering. He immediately moved to walk alongside us as well. "You've got your voice back, too. Does that mean you can feel again?"
Colette smiled, looking honestly happy for the first time in I don't know how long. "Uh huh! The wind's kind of chilly up here, isn't it? Hehe...I think I'm even hungry!"
"That's great!" Lloyd said, his eyes lighting up.
"What a relief..." Genis let out a contented sigh.
"Ooh, I was right," Zelos murmured, looking over his shoulder at us. "Colette really is cuter when she smiles~!"
"Zelos, right?" Colette said, her blue eyes meeting his. "It's nice to finally be able to talk to you!"
"You remembered my name!" The redhead grinned. "Us Chosen have to stick together, you know what I mean?"
Colette nodded cheerfully. "Okay!"
"Hey, Colette. Since you can finally eat again, why don't you pick what we have for dinner tonight?" Lloyd asked, but Raine immediately shook her head.
"I'm afraid that kind of luxury will have to wait...we're very low on rations."
"Oh, it's okay," Colette said. "I'm just happy I can finally eat."
"We'll have to buy some more supplies somehow," I said, frowning. "If we're gonna check the Archives, we'd might as well get some stuff while we're in Meltokio."
"We're fugitives, though," Genis reminded us. "Is it really a good idea to be sneaking into the city just to check something? Besides, this isn't fair to Presea! We said we'd bring her home, and we're still dragging her along!"
"Oh, that's right!" Zelos said. "We've gotta bring Presea to that Kate chick, too."
"Unfortunately, the Grand Tethe'alla bridge is most likely still unusable," Raine remarked.
"Hmm...I've got contacts in Meltokio," Sheena told us. "We can try asking them for help."
"Well, that's convenient," Zelos said with a smirk. "We can check the Archives and get supplies at the same time."
"But that doesn't change the fact that we're wanted traitors," Genis pointed out.
"Relax, brat," the redhead said happily. "I know Meltokio like the back of my hand. Trust me, I'll find us a way in."
"Okay," Lloyd said, smiling. "We're counting on you, Zelos."
"You got it! You can always count on me, bud!" Zelos said, ruffling Lloyd's hair and causing me to snort. "Now, my hunnies, we're off to Meltokio!" He pumped one fist in the air, taking the lead and marching on down the path. I knew he'd probably slink back to the middle of the group in about five minutes.
"Heh." I grinned. "It's good to be making some progress. And now we've got Colette back!"
"Welcome back, Colette," Lloyd added, grinning along with me.
She smiled happily. "I'm glad to be back!"
We managed to make it to the base of the mountain by nightfall, and set up camp in the same spot we had camped out at the night before. All in all, I'd say we had accomplished a good amount today. Still, I found myself remaining quiet through many of the others' conversations; I couldn't help but brood over what had transpired.
Now that we had gotten that unpleasant incident over with, we were heading to get the EC...and then we'd cross the ocean and head over to Sybak. Well, at least we wouldn't have to cross that stupid bridge again. Though I had a feeling I'd be getting seasick right along with Raine once we got on that stupid thing...I had never really crossed a large body of water before on a ship, so I wasn't too sure how well I'd deal with it. Especially when the vehicle in question was never meant to be used in that way.
Oh, but before all that, we'd get to stay in Zelos' house again! No more camping out, awesome!
...But I'd be in a house full of people who were probably questioning their trust in me. They apparently didn't think I was a lunatic, at least...but I didn't really want them thinking of me as a liar, either. Oh, man...what was I going to do? Even though these Archives or whatever wouldn't have records of me, that still wasn't exactly solid proof. I had a feeling Raine wouldn't fully believe me either way. And then she'd start asking more of those prying questions and trying to figure out what my secret was, which would suck because I was still hiding something, and it'd all just be one big disaster...
I heaved a sigh, rubbing my forehead. I was overthinking things again...and I had absolutely no control over the situation, anyway. Kratos had effectively screwed me over and now I had to deal with it. If I managed to stay with the group until we bumped into Yuan again, maybe he could give me a hand. He probably wouldn't, though, because he was a jerk.
"...So you were aware of everything, the whole time?" Lloyd's surprised voice derailed my train of thought, and I decided to listen in on the coversation rather than brood.
Colette nodded. "Well, mostly. It was a little strange..."
"I'm assuming that means we don't have to fill you in on what's happened, correct?" Raine spoke up, shifting a little from her spot near the campfire.
"Yes, Professor," Colette confirmed. She was eating some of Genis' cooking; though tonight's meal was relatively simple, she still seemed to be enjoying it a lot. I couldn't imagine what it must've been like to be incapable of eating.
"I mean, I think I remember everything," the blonde said, looking thoughtful. Then her face fell. "I kicked that poor doggie..."
"Don't go blaming yourself for that, Colette!" Genis quickly said. "You weren't really in control at that point, either."
"I guess you're right..." Colette murmured, sighing. "I can always apologize to him when we go back there."
"I don't know if we'll have time to search the city for a stray dog..." Raine remarked, as Sheena just looked confused. The matter wasn't terribly important, so I didn't bother to offer an explanation.
"So, my little angel!" Zelos interrupted the conversation, grinning. "You remember how valiantly I defended you from those Papal Knights back at the Academy, right?"
The blonde paused, honestly stopping to think about it. "Um..."
Lloyd and Presea both gave Zelos a deadpan stare, and the redhead pouted.
"Well, it was worth a shot..." he muttered. Sheena rolled her eyes.
After a few moments, Lloyd spoke up with a frown. "...Hey, guys, I was thinking about something."
"Hm? What is it, Lloyd?" Colette asked.
"It's that Yuan guy," he explained. "He said he was the leader of the Renegades, right? But now suddenly we find out he's an angel, too? It doesn't make sense...who is he really working for?"
"My first guess would be that he's a double agent," Raine remarked. "From the way that Pronyma woman spoke to him, he seems to be someone of high rank. Working for Cruxis would be an easy way for him to keep an eye on Yggdrasill."
"Not only that," Sheena added, "but if Cruxis did all the research on Brittany and brought her here, it would make sense that Yuan knew so much about it."
Some of the others frowned at that, but I didn't offer any input. I just pretended to think hard about the matter at hand.
"We still don't know why he's after Lloyd," Genis pointed out. Raine shook her head.
"That still puzzles me as well..."
"Maybe he just really likes Lloyd, if you know what I mean-agh! Sheenaaaa!" That was Zelos, whose own comments were apparently not appreciated by the majority of the group. I was attempting to hide a grin as Lloyd looked disturbed.
"Uh..." The brunette looked like he wanted to ask, but was afraid to.
"Ignore him!" Sheena ordered.
"What?" Zelos whimpered. "He said 'You're mine, Lloyd.' Am I the only one here who finds that just a little sketchy?"
I snorted, and my shoulders started to shake with barely suppressed laughter. Oh, God, Zelos was so awesome for pointing that out. It was like he had read my mind.
"Don't encourage him!" Sheena said to me, glaring.
"Ew..." Lloyd facepalmed, probably trying to ignore Zelos' words.
Raine let out a sigh, looking a bit exasperated. "There are still many things we don't know about the situation. Regardless, all we can do now is push forward. Let's just focus on getting to Meltokio."
"Sounds good to me," I said, sobering. Then I stood up, stretching.
"Where are you going?" Genis asked me, noticing how I had turned in the direction of the trees.
I shrugged. "Just for a walk. Be back in a minute or two."
Raine nodded, not bothering to question me. By now, most of them knew my code; whenever I said I was going on a walk, I was most likely about to run off and dunk my head in a stream or something. I didn't like attempting to bathe in freezing cold rivers and streams, but I didn't like feeling disgusting all the time, either.
Zelos looked a little puzzled, but he'd probably understand when he saw me come back with my hair wet...oh dear God. It occurred to me that I might have to be a lot more secretive about bathing from today onward, or I might end up getting some unwanted company. Hopefully Sheena would force the guy to stay put.
Trying to shake off the thought of how mortifying it would be to have a certain pervert spy on me, I headed away from the campsite and in the direction of the nearest mountain stream. I would stay close to the base of the mountain, where there were lots of trees...at least that would provide some cover.
Of course, half the time I went on walks, cleaning myself up wasn't the real reason behind it. Lloyd could always tell when I was brooding and he'd harrass me about it as a result. So, lately, I had been using bathing as an excuse; as long as I came back looking like I had gotten wet, no one would realize that I had actually run off to wallow in my own angst.
I frowned, continuing onward. Maybe Lloyd was right to get so pissed at me; all I ever did was brood, after all. Hey, it wasn't my fault so much horrible shit happened to this group.
After a few minutes, I emerged from the trees and found the place I had been looking for. It was dark, but there was just enough light from the stars for me to find my way. I paused and took a seat on the bank of the stream, pulling off my boots.
A rustling sound came from behind me, and I stopped as I heard a twig snap. When I looked over my shoulder, I was glad to see the color white instead of pink emerging from the trees. It was only Colette.
"Brittany?" She hesitated where she was, though I knew she could see me very clearly through the darkness.
I smiled, patting the ground next to me. The Chosen relaxed, smiling back as she trotted over and sat down.
"What's up, Colette?" I asked, staring out at the water. It was weird...we hadn't spoken like this since that night before we went to the Tower of Mana. It was still so strange hearing her voice.
"I just wanted to tell you something," she replied, and then stared at her lap as she fell silent for a moment. I waited patiently, wondering what she had to say.
"When I...wasn't myself," she continued, "it was really lonely. Thank you for always talking to me so much, even when I couldn't say anything back. I know it didn't look like it, but it made me so happy."
I blinked, watching her for a second, and then looked away. I wanted to reply, but it was suddenly difficult to form words. In this crazy reality, sometimes it felt like I could never make a difference no matter how much I tried...but hearing Colette tell me this made all my efforts worthwhile. At least something good came out of all this bullshit...
"I...I'm glad," I said quietly.
"You're a really good friend," she told me. "And I trust you. So...I believe you're telling the truth about Earth, too."
That caused me to falter again. I bit my lip, staring at my hands, which were clasped in my lap. "You...honestly do?"
"Uh huh!" She confirmed, becoming cheery again. "Besides...Lloyd and Sheena believe you, and I trust them, too."
"Thanks, Colette..." I murmured, smiling weakly. "But what about the others?"
"I'm sure Professor Sage and Genis will come around once they see that your records aren't in the archives," Colette said. "And Zelos, too! He seems to really like you."
I felt my face starting to turn pink. "...No, I think the only thing Zelos really likes about me is how easily he can make me blush..."
More rustling from the trees behind us. We both turned to look over one shoulder, and now a figure in red emerged.
"Hi, Lloyd!" Colette said, raising a hand in greeting. He smiled.
"Mind if I join you guys?"
The blonde looked over to me, and I just shrugged. "Be my guest." In any case, I highly doubted I'd be getting any bathing time in tonight.
Lloyd came over and sat down on the other side of me, forming some sort of Symphonia-wich. Or was it an Earthwich? You described sandwiches based on the meat and not the bread, so I guess it'd be an Earthwich...why was I thinking about this again?
"...So, what's up?" Lloyd said after a moment, looking over at the two of us.
"I wonder what an Earthwich would taste like..."
Lloyd gave me a deadpan stare; he was used to me making weird comments. "...What is it now?"
My head snapped up. "Uh, did I say that aloud?"
He smacked his forehead as Colette giggled. "You are such a weirdo."
"...Moving on," I said loudly, rubbing the back of my neck. "What brings you to this neck of the woods, Lloydie?"
Lloyd rolled his eyes. "I dunno, I figured you'd be out here brooding or something."
That nearly caused me to flinch. Ah, crap. He'd figured me out yet again. But I really had intended to bathe this time!
As Lloyd and I were bickering, Colette had removed her shoes and dipped her feet into the water. I reached out and mussed Lloyd's hair before pushing my boots aside, intending to copy the blonde.
Lloyd paused just long enough to grin at Colette. "Is the water cold?"
"Yeah! It's really cold," she confimed, smiling back at him.
"Why don't you test it out, Lloydie?" I asked, sticking my legs in the water and soaking my pants up to the knees. I tugged on one of his ribbons. "Go on, just fall right in, like you did at Lake Umacy."
Colette giggled. "We need a better spot, so he can make a big splash."
"Ha-ha," Lloyd said, poking me. "You fell in that day too, Brit. Why don't you go in first?"
"Oh, I'd love to," I said, and sighed. "But you fell in first last time, so we'd better keep up with that tradition."
Lloyd continued to grin for a moment, but then the look faltered. His shoulders slumped and he stared down at the water, his eyes downcast.
"What's wrong, Lloyd?" Colette asked, concerned.
He shook his head. "It's just...I can't look back on that day without remembering him."
That caused me to pause as well, and I stared at my lap. "Ah...sorry for bringing it up."
Now that I was thinking about it, I really missed those days...sometimes you never really learn to appreciate something until it's gone. Life back then didn't seem so bad now, in comparison to how things were now. There was less fighting, yeah, but there were more uncertainties and more things at stake...not to mention, we now lacked someone who had made up a very important part of our old group.
"Don't apologize," he said, sighing. "It's not your fault."
"I wonder why Kratos stopped Yuan and that lady earlier," Colette said, leaning back on her palms and looking up at the sky.
"Yeah...they probably could have beaten us, and you would've been captured," Lloyd said, clenching his fists. "That Pronyma lady is one thing, but Yuan is really tough..."
"Kratos mentioned a change in plans," I remarked. "So...for some reason, they don't need Colette for the time being."
"That means we have more time to travel around without worrying about Cruxis, right?" Colette spoke up, smiling.
"...I guess so," Lloyd muttered, looking troubled. "It still seems weird to me, though. And Kratos...what was he trying to pull? Sifting through the lies or whatever...he made Brittany sound a lot worse than she really is."
I shifted uncomfortably at that, mainly because I still was still keeping quite a few secrets from the group. Kratos' words had actually been spot on-but I wasn't about to tell them that.
"Well, if you think about it, it's kind of a good thing that Kratos told us," Colette said. "I mean, I'm really glad that Brittany told us the truth."
"We were going to tell everyone even before that, though," Lloyd said.
I didn't make any comment on that, though I knew I would have avoided telling the truth unless Lloyd had flat-out forced me to do it. In some ways, that kick in the ass from Kratos was a good thing; I wasn't about to thank him for it, though. There were still four members of the group that hadn't said whether they really believed me or not. I guess Presea's vote wouldn't count, though, since she couldn't really form an opinion until she regained her suppressed emotions.
The brunette heaved a sigh. "Either way...even if we can't convince the Professor, I'll still stick by you, Brit."
"Me, too," Colette added.
"Ah...thanks, guys," I said awkwardly, rubbing the back of my neck.
We fell silent for a few minutes after that, and the silence wasn't broken until Colette shifted to pull her feet out of the water. We both gave her a questioning look as she put on her shoes, and received a radiant smile in return.
"You know what? I can't remember the last time I felt this sleepy! I'm going to go to bed now, okay? Goodnight!"
The two of us couldn't help but grin back at her. "Goodnight, Colette!" we chorused.
I watched her form disappear into the shadows, and hoped that her sleep would be a peaceful one. After all she had been through, it would really suck if she started having crazy nightmares like I did every now and then. Hell, I hoped the Professor let her sleep in, though I doubted that would really happen.
"Dammit..." Lloyd murmured after a few seconds. I looked over at him.
"What is it now?"
"...I don't know," he said, shaking his head. "I just feel like something's still wrong."
Maybe it was the fact that Colette was still far from being cured? Or that Kratos was still a bastard, Presea was soulless, I was a liar, and Zelos was a triple agent?
"You shouldn't worry about things you can't control," I finally said, patting him on the shoulder and knowing I was a complete hypocrite.
"It's just...so frustrating!" he burst out all of a sudden, startling me. I drew my hand back, turning to face him.
"...What is?"
He ran a gloved hand through his hair, restless. "You saw Kratos today. He knows what he did to us, and yet he just looked at us like...like...!"
I turned my gaze back to the water, biting my lip. "I know...it's like he doesn't even remember who we are. It's almost as if the Kratos we knew never existed..."
"But he still exists!" Lloyd insisted. "The way he talks...and the way he acts, too...it's still him. He's on a different side, but he's still our Kratos! And I still feel like I have to prove myself to him!" He clutched his head in his hands, squeezing his eyes shut.
"He's our enemy...I know I shouldn't care what he thinks, but...what's wrong with me?"
"Lloyd..." I murmured, and then fell silent, watching him.
It hurt...it was all just one big mess. It hurt knowing Kratos wasn't on our side anymore, it hurt seeing that cold gaze turned on us, and it hurt seeing Lloyd look so tormented and being unable to do anything to help. More than anything, I wanted to tell him the truth...that Kratos would be doing his best to help us from behind the scenes. But I knew I couldn't. Even if I managed to explain the whole thing to Lloyd, and even if he managed to keep it to himself, I still had a feeling it wouldn't make a difference. I knew what was really supposed to happen, and Kratos' betrayal had still upset me a great deal. How would knowledge of the future do anything but torment Lloyd further?
"...There's nothing wrong with you, stupid," I finally said, putting an arm around him in a half-hug. It wasn't much for comfort, but it was the best I could do. "I know exactly how you feel, so...so don't hate yourself, okay? You're doing the best you can."
I felt Lloyd relax a little, but he still didn't look too happy. "...Thanks," he said in a distracted tone. "I guess I just need time to think."
Getting the hint, I pulled away from him and got to my feet. "...Well, I'm gonna go get some rest, then," I said, pulling on my boots. "We've got a lot of walking to do tomorrow, anyway. Goodnight, Lloyd."
"Night," came his reply, and then he fell silent once more.
I stood there for a second, frowning at his back, before turning towards the woods. There was no sense in sticking around when I really couldn't say anything to comfort him. So I headed back to camp, leaving a sullen Lloyd sitting quietly on the riverbank.
A/N: ...Bleh. Not a lot even happened in this chapter. Or maybe that's just me. Umm...now that I got all those random conversations over with, maybe I'll actually...I don't know, move on with the plot. XD
Review, and...uh...I'll probably update faster? Maybe? XD
Next time: A wild Regal appears! The wild Regal uses Stomp! It's super effective! Zelos fainted!