Chapter Thirty Seven.

Jasper

I left with Peter as soon as the funeral was over, I needed to see Bella. She had to be told about Leah although I thought she might find some consolation at the way it ended. There was also our conversation to finish, I wasn't sure I was up for that but I guess I couldn't put it off. I didn't know what I would do when she went. My life would be over but I'd take it on the chin and let her walk away so she'd have no regrets. I was a nervous wreck on our way, I couldn't shake the feeling that Jacob had beaten me, that she would be gone, a werewolf's mate and not mine. I couldn't bear the thought that he had got to her before I could tell her how I felt. I didn't think I could live without her in my life. If she was gone I would be lost. I couldn't go on knowing I'd lost her, lost my one and only chance at a life with my one true love. As we arrived at the lodge I knew I was too late, I could smell the dog in the air, he had been here. He'd come straight from killing Leah to whispering thoughts of love into Bella's ear. Had she believed him? Had she gone off with him to the Reservation? Was she about to become his wife? I couldn't cope with that, I would have to follow her, kill him and try to win her back. I had lost the battle but not the war. She was mine and I would get her back. I was out of the Cat as Peter pulled up, and through the door. Peter followed me almost immediately, taking Charlotte in his arms and holding her tightly. I looked at her with a hopeless feeling but she smiled at me.

"Your lady is in the bedroom Major".

I could hardly believe her but I rushed into the room and saw Bella laying there on the bed. I thought at first that she was asleep, until I saw her smile at me and hold her arms out. I couldn't believe it, she was still here, she hadn't gone or been spirited away by the dog. Not only that but she was holding her arms out for me, I was nervous but I wasn't going to refuse her.

Bella

He rushed to me and fell into my arms. I held him as tight as I could, running my hands over him to make sure he wasn't hurt. I grabbed his head and pulled it to my own, smelling his amazing scent and holding him against my lips so he couldn't escape. He was my Major, he was mine and I loved him with all my heart. I knew he was the one, Edward had been but a pale imitation of Jasper. He was my knight in shining armour, the one who would love me and protect me till the end of time. Oh God I hoped he felt the same way, if not, I was in a whole heap of trouble.

Jasper

I felt her love washing over me, or was it mine that I was projecting? I was so confused I didn't know what to think. She held me and whispered in my ear.

"Jazz, don't think, just feel. I need you to stop concentrating and just feel what is incoming. Block your emotions, I know you can do that. I need you to feel what I am feeling."

I didn't know if I could do it, my feelings were so intense I wasn't sure I could block them out but I had to try. If I wanted to know what was going on in Bella's heart I had to block my feelings out and feel only hers. I stopped and took a deep breath then locked my feelings behind a solid wall. I felt so I knew it would be only her feelings that entered me. I slowly opened my mind and was knocked backwards by the feelings that flooded in. She was as deeply in love with me as I was with her. There was a hollow ache mixed in with it though and I was confused by that.

"What are you worried about Bella? I can feel it."

She thought for a second.

"I guess I still think that Alice might turn up at any moment and whisk you away from me. Charlotte said that it was over between the two of you

but I don't understand. You've been together for so long and you looked so happy together. What went wrong Jasper? Was it me? Did you fall out over my birthday party? Am I responsible for what happened between you two?"

I looked deep into her eyes and answered as honestly as I could.

"Alice and I were having problems long before you came on the scene. She admitted to me just before you moved to Forks that she'd lied about us. That there was someone coming who would mean the end for us. I always thought what she and I had was true, the real thing. It didn't seem as strong as Carlisle and Esme or Rose and Emmett but I thought that was my fault. That I wasn't capable of the same deep feelings and she let me believe that. I think she genuinely felt something for me and I will always be thankful for the new life she showed me. I was a monster before I met her Bella. Now I really feel I have changed, I'm not the bloodthirsty war monger that I was for so long."

Bella pulled me close again and whispered in my ear.

"You will never be that man again. I won't let you. You'll always be my shining Knight. The one who saved me and showed me what real friendship is. Now I want to show you real..."

Her sentence was cut short as Peter rushed over

"Incoming bogeys" he shouted

and pulled Bella from my side, placing her behind himself and Charlotte. I looked out and grunted.

"Very funny Peter. Alice is not the enemy."

He grunted

"Oh yeah? I'm not protecting Bella from her, I'm standing here to stop Bella ripping her throat out any second."

Bella looked up at him.

"Mind, explaining?"

She seemed to have no fear standing so close to two blood drinkers with bright red eyes.

"Nah, Think I'll just kick back and watch the fun."

Charlotte hit him across the back of the head.

"Stop being a troublemaker. I think we should go for a walk while Bella and her f...Well until things are settled."

Saying that she kissed Bella on the cheek and pulled my friend out the back door, him still complaining about missing the pixie get her comeuppance.

I hadn't had time to let Bella know about Charlie and Alice and it looked like I was too late now. Alice walked through the front door followed by Carlisle, Emmett and Charlie. Bella smiled to see them all, although she was a little annoyed at my standing in her direct line of sight. She peered round me as she cried

"Dad. I've missed you so much."

She opened her arms and he ran to her and pulled her into a hug. Very unusual for the normally stoical Charlie. Carlisle walked over next and smiled down at her.

"Hello Bella."

She gave him a wan smile but shook his hand hesitantly before looking back at her father. Next minute she was swinging around the room in Emmett's signature bear hug. She smiled faintly then asked him to put her down before she was sick, she did look a little green. He was hurt by the cool reception she gave him and looked at me but I just shrugged. Alice came forward, very soberly for her.

"Hello Bella. I'm really sorry I left and I wish I could have seen your accident so I could have warned you."

Bella put her hand up.

"Thanks Alice but what's done is done."

She looked at all three of them then at Charlie.

"Dad could I have a few minutes please?"

He looked at her face then at Alice. At her slight nod he got up and walked back outside. Bella then looked at me.

"Jasper I'll be fine. Why don't you go talk to Charlie for a minute."

I wasn't happy, but I couldn't refuse her so I followed Charlie out. He was sitting on a fallen log looking out across the snow but moved up to make room for me to join him.

"Do you have a problem with Alice and me?" he asked.

I shook my head and laughed.

"Hardly seeing as I'm going to be asking you for your daughter's hand."

He laughed and shrugged.

"Guess I can hardly say no son."

That would take a bit of getting used to and my ex would be my mother in law. Whoa!