A/N
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Not a lot of Chad POV for a reason… Kind of suckish...
SONNY POV
Waking up in a hospital put everything in a reality. The sheets were cold and starched, the pillow was flat, the room was fluorescent and the blinds barely blocked the sun. I was in a backless gown, not one of his shirts. I wasn't at home in Chad's bed. If I turn around, I'm not gonna hit his warm arm. This sucks. I'm gonna be in here for a week just so my stomach ulcer can heal up. Don't get me wrong, I want it to heal but can't I get it to heal in my own house?
I took a look at my hospital bracelet and sighed. Then I looked at the empty room in front of me. There were three chairs and a tiny two cushion couch. This is all so bleak. I searched for the nurses' button on the side of my bed and pressed it. After, I found the TV remote and turned it on, flipping channels until I found something I could watch. "She's the Man" with Amanda Bynes and Channing Tatum. I just mindlessly stared at the television. I was so bored.
"Good morning, Sonny," The nurse came in with a cart that had a food cover on it. I furrowed my brows and watched her situate it in front of me. "I'm Janet."
"Hi," I said back.
"Well, since you have a stomach ulcer, we have meals that'll help rebuild the stomach lining. For breakfast: whole grain pancakes, with fat free syrup and scrambled eggs with a side of toast."
"Two breads?" Janet had dark brown hair and brown eyes. She was chubby, but pretty. She seemed very happy about her job.
"Carbohydrates help with the healing." She smiled. I picked up the fork and took two bites of the eggs, feeling it drop in my stomach.
"I'm finished,"
"No, you're not." She giggled. "The doctors told me that you had an eating disorder. I'm here to help. This meal won't make you full and because it's natural and healthy, it won't pack on any pounds. Plus, it'll provide plenty of vitamins for the baby." She walked around the bed and sat in one of the chairs near the window.
"You're going to stay?"
"You're going to finish that." She stated. "That's what I'm here for,"
"But I... I'm not hungry."
"You don't have to lie to me, Sonny. The floor you're on is basically for eating disorders. You're bulimic and you gave yourself a stomach ulcer." She turned and explained to me. "You're hurting your body and putting it at risk of miscarrying." She motioned to the fork in my hand and poked it into the pancake. I picked the disc up and brought it to my mouth, taking a test bite. It was bland. "It isn't so bad."
"There's no flavor,"
"If you put syrup on it, it'll taste better..." She replied. I didn't want to eat. I just wanted my mom... and Chad.
"I have to eat all of it?"
"Ninety percent of it, yes."
"Are you like a therapist?"
"No, I'm a nutritionist." She answered. "I know what will help you gain your health back,"
"But I'm healthy."
"No, Sonny, you're not. You have an eating disorder. It's an emotional and mental disorder," I took another small bite. "Not much is going to happen in a week but hopefully, we can try to help you as much as we can, okay? A beautiful girl like you shouldn't have to go through this." She's just saying that because she has to. I hesitantly ate everything on the plate over the course of half an hour, feeling my stomach fill up. It was weird, it was uncomfortable, and I felt nasty. I took a few sips of the water that she gave me and sighed. I wanted to throw up. I felt fat.
"See? Think of how happy your baby is," Janet coaxed and stood up from her chair. "He's going to grow happy and healthy."
"Mm," As soon as she leaves... she started moving the tray out of the room but stopped in front of the bathroom.
"Just so you don't," She took out her keys from her pocket and closed the bathroom door. She locked it and walked over to the trash can. She put it on top of the tray and looked at me. "If you have to use the bathroom, press the button, sweetheart."
Damnit.
CHAD POV
I inhaled from my cigarette deeply and exhaled slowly. I watched the cars pass by in front of my office building as I inhaled again. I didn't sleep at all last night; I had a headache that kept me up. I was worried about Sonny and I felt like shit. My body just wouldn't let me sleep. I stayed up, researching ways to help someone with bulimia, how to get them to cope without purging. I don't understand why she would resort to that; even if she did tell me how she felt. I inhaled again.
"I thought you quit smoking." Hanna said, walking up to me with her Wendy's cup in her hand. I exhaled heavily away from her and sighed.
"I'm stressed,"
"Oh, Sonny's got you stressed out, huh? What happened? What'd she do?"
"She... didn't do anything. Don't worry about it, Hanna," Is it weird that I'm uncomfortable around her?
"Oh..." She breathed out. "Is she having school problems?"
"No,"
"Family problems?"
"No, Hanna. Stop being so fucking nosy." I snapped at her. "It's none of your damn business,"
"Damn, you must be really stressed..." She chuckled. "Want a massage?" I glared at her while she laughed. I took a long drag, "I was kidding, Chad. Why don't you eat some lunch? Take a breather," She patted my arm and shrugged.
"I'm fine."
"No, you're obviously angry about something," I inhaled again, breathing out my nose "Did you guys have dinner, okay? Was something wrong with the dress? She didn't like it?"
"She wasn't feeling well. We didn't make it to dinner last night."
"I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?"
"No, you've done enough. Just leave me alone," I said deeply, pushing a free hand in my pocket. She switched her weight to her left foot.
"Chad, I'm just tryi-"
"Don't try. Don't do anything." I tossed the small stick on the ground and stepped on it. "Just do your fucking job and take my fucking phone calls." Hanna scoffed and stepped back.
"Why are you being such an ass? Just because you're stressed out, doesn't mean you have to be a jerk,"
"Shut up, Hanna..." I groaned and rolled my eyes.
"Fuck you..." She sneered and pushed past me. I snorted out of annoyance and took my car keys out of my pocket.
I pulled into a spot at the hospital and cut off the car, getting out and closing the door behind me. I walked into the main entrance. I didn't know what room they moved her to so I walked up to the desk and waited for the woman to acknowledge me.
"Yes?"
"I'm here to see Sonny Monroe. I brought her last night." She typed into the computer and stared at it for a few minutes.
"She's in room 731." I nodded, walking away and heading towards the elevator.
I took it all the way up to the seventh floor with two other people and went my separate way to where the numbers increased. When I reached her room, I knocked on the door shortly and pushed it open. I saw Sonny sitting on the bed with a nurse, setting up a tray in front of her. I wasn't close enough to hear what she was saying but I could see Sonny shake her head and pushed it away. It was heart breaking. She refuses to eat. When she knows that her health isn't that great already. When I actually see what I was doing to her, it made a lump form in my throat. I'm a terrible person. I closed the door and put my keys in my pockets. Both their heads turned and Sonny gave a small smile.
"Hey," She said. "Why aren't you at work?"
"I'm on break." I responded.
"Is this family?" The nurse asked.
"He's my boyfriend and the baby's father..."
"Oh..." She drawled out, giving me a weird look. Yes, there is an age difference and she really shouldn't worry about it. "I'm Janet, her nurse slash nutritionist for the week."
I shook her hand shortly. "Chad,"
"Well Chad, she's refusing to eat again. There's chicken, rice and beans. Sonny won't eat it."
"That's because... she's a vegetarian," I smirked and made my way around the bed. "She doesn't eat meat."
"I'm sorry but... it's a part of her diet." Janet shrugged and clasped her hands on her lap. "Do you want me to leave you two alone so you can... talk her into it?"
"That'd be best," She nodded and went out of the room with her bubbly personality. When she closed the door, I sat in one of the chairs next to her bed and watched her fiddle her thumbs. Sonny looked a little nervous, a little sick and scared. I put my arms on the arm rest and tilted my head. Come on, Sonshine. She chewed on her bottom lip gently when her eyes met mine and sighed. "Eat," I told her.
"I'm not hungry."
"Sonny, eat the food." I stated. She exhaled once more before shaking her head.
"I'm still full from breakfast..." I dragged a hand down my face and groaned.
"I know you don't eat meat. I know you don't want to eat it but it's for your health so you have no choice,"
"I've been a vegetarian for seven years. I'm not all of a sudden going to eat chicken." She spat out. "It doesn't work like that."
"Yeah well when you're carrying a baby and you already deprived him of nutrients, you make sacrifices. When you have an ulcer and you're trying to heal it, you eat what they tell you for your health." I responded, getting up from the chair and putting myself on the end of her bed. "Eat. The food." She hesitantly picked up the fork and plastic knife, cutting the chicken breast and using the fork to hold it. She put it in her mouth silently, chewing like it was disgusting. Like she was repulsed by it. She took another bite and I relaxed, she was eating. That's good. That's all I wanted. I moved back over to my chair, she was still eating, putting a forkful of rice into her mouth. I focused my eyes on what she was watching, "Law and Order: SVU" I won't lie. I've watched a marathon of these once because it was interesting. "How's your stomach feeling? Did they give you any medicine?"
"Just a lot of liquids," She replied. "And... foods with bread in it." She then said lowly. "My stomach only hurts when I move too much,"
"Did you have the urge to... get rid of it?" She nodded. "Why?"
"It made my stomach stretch... it was uncomfortable," Sonny muttered, pushing beans around her plate with her fork and swallowing. "I'm full..."
"You barely ate."
"But I'm not hungry anymore," She pushed the tray away from her and leaned back.
"Come on, baby, you can eat a little more." I encouraged. "It's healthy food also..."
"Chad, I'm not hungry,"
"Or you just don't want to eat."
"I'm actually not hungry," She shook her head and closed her eyes. "Do um... all of the guys know? They'll probably think I'm crazy."
"No, I told Grady not to tell anyone."
"What about Hanna? Does she know since she's your temp?" I shook my head. "Do you want her to know?"
"Not really, no. She'll just harass me about it."
"Oh,"
"Why didn't you just tell me how you felt about Hanna?"
"I didn't want to be one of those girls that... complained whenever the guy she was interested in was with another girl. Plus, technically... you weren't my boyfriend until a week before my birthday. You were available all that time before then. I didn't know what to think."
"So, you kept it to yourself and let it eat away at you," I chuckled. "That wasn't a good way to cope. Wh-When and how did this start?"
"The day she came to your house the first time. I felt bad and I just went home and ate and ate and ate. Then I... purged," Her voice shook a little. "Then on top of that, I had those problems with Tawni and she had everyone calling me fat. I was just... messed up." She put her hands over her face and inhaled before dropping them. "It wasn't just Hanna. It was my own mind screwing me over. I figured if I stopped eating all together, I'll stay the way I am. Then I'd start feeling really bad about myself and I'd eat whatever I can get my hands on. Then I'd throw up. It fell into a pattern," She looked out the window and puffed her cheeks up. I absolutely hate myself. "I'd swear to myself that... I wouldn't purge anymore but I couldn't help it. When I'm with you... or anyone else... I'm afraid to eat. I'd just say I wasn't hungry but when I was alone, I was pigging out. And then I was in the bathroom,"
"Sonny, I'm sorry." I said sincerely and lowly. She just shook her head with a small laugh. I wanted to scream. I wanted to yell that what she was doing was stupid. But it'd only upset her and... possibly hurt her more than she already is.
"It's not your fault. My insecurities took over. My mind was making up things about... my body. It got worse after I got pregnant. I was going to get big and... I wouldn't be the Sonny that you first met or... fell I love with for that matter." She chuckled and turned her head back to me.
"Honestly?" She nodded. "I'm going to be horny all the time for three reasons," She started laughing automatically. "I won't tell you because it's very dirty and… I'm not going to get myself worked up. But I can say that… we'll be having sex at least ten times I week."
"Wow!" She laughed loudly and covered her mouth. I'm happy she's laughing, she needed a good laugh.
"I'm just saying..."
"That was funny..." She giggled.
"I was being serious though."
SONNY POV
I was happy Chad is here. He can keep my mind off the fact that I just ate chicken and it was making my stomach feel weird. I haven't had actual meat in a long time. I ate meat substitute that they sell at Vegan shops. Other than the fact that he practically made me eat the food, I was okay, I guess. I wasn't dying from eating an animal but I wanted to throw it up. I wasn't lying when I said I was full. I was full in a nasty way and I wanted it out of me. Ugh... this sucks because the bathroom door is locked. You know, there's still that voice in my head telling me that Chad is just saying things to make me feel better. I'm trying my hardest to ignore it.
"Hey um... did Jake say anything to you last night?"
"Your brother? Oh, he hates me," I snickered. "He dislikes me with a passion." He said.
"Hm."
"I'm gonna come back tonight since my break is almost over. I'll bring clothes and a pillow and your phone. Call and let me know if you want me to bring anything else."
"A warmer blanket would be nice." I nodded when he stood and slide toward me. He leaned down and cupped my face, pecking my lips leisurely. I kissed him back and let my eyes fall shut.
"Bye..."
"See you later." I waved shortly as he walked out of the room. Then I was alone... And I became sad again. I didn't like being alone. Especially after I just ate chicken because the sickness came back. It wasn't nasty, I just wasn't used to eat and the fact that I was eating a dead animal got to me. Ugh, I'm disgusting. I pressed the nurse button and waited for Janet to come. It only took her a few minutes to come in with a smile on her face.
"How do you feel?"
"Horrible."
"The chicken was bad?"
"No, I just... ate chicken. I feel horrible. My stomach feels weird and... the taste was weirder."
"It'll be okay." She chuckled and moved the tray out of my way. "Do you have that urge to...?" I nodded. "Talk to me, what's wrong?" Skeptically, I opened my mouth.
I was woken up from my nap by two voices, two male voices. I knew who they were and a tired grin just plastered on my face. I rolled onto my back and saw Derek holding like seven balloons and Jake holding a large brown bear. I started laughing when they smiled and pressed the button for the bed to go in the up position.
"Hey," Derek stated. I just kept laughing.
"What are you idiots doing?" I giggled and pushed my hair behind my ear.
"We brought get well soon presents," Jake said with the bear in front of his face. I giggled and shook my head. "You still laugh when I talk through stuffed animals. You're such a kid," He teased, throwing the bear at me with a laugh and sitting in one of the chairs. Whenever I was sad, he'd take a stuffed animal and talk through it in a weird voice. He's done it ever since I was a baby. It's kinda sad that it still works on me. "How ya feeling?"
"They gave me stuff to stop the pain but I feel a little okay."
"What'd you eat today?" Derek tied the balloons on the bed before taking a seat next to Jake.
"Chicken."
"What?" Jake's smirk dropped. "You ate meat?"
"I had to. It was part of the diet."
"Did you cry?" Derek poked. "You big baby."
"Yes, Derek... I balled my eyes out," I chuckled and played with the bears arms in my lap. "Where are Nicole and Ariana?"
"Work..." They responded.
"Why aren't you at your jobs?"
"There was a little... mishap in the sauna. No one is allowed in until they fix it,"
"Did you two have anything to do with it?" I narrowed my eyes at them.
"No, the door got stuck and locked about... six women inside. They were dehydrated so... they're trying to figure out the problem." Derek stated. "Are they treating you okay here?"
"Yeah... when Chad left and the nurse did what she had to do, a therapist came in about an hour later and reduced me to tears. I cried and she told me it was going to be okay." I stated, watching Jake's jaw clench.
"What'd you tell her?"
"Some stuff that... was going on between Chad and me."
"What'd you say?"
"I can't tell you. It's private," I shrugged, poking the bears black, marble eyes. "How was mom after she left last night?"
"Emotional. Since she doesn't sleep in the same room as dad, she sleeps in your room. She was crying all night. I got her to calm down with a glass of wine. It put her right to sleep," Jake ran a hand through his cut hair. Nicole did a good job.
"Mm..." I hope my mother doesn't start drinking. She doesn't even like alcohol that much. That's why a glass of wine knocked her out. "And dad? Has he um... said anything or calmed down?"
"Nah." Derek stated. "We just stay out his way and let him do him,"
"Do you try talking to him?"
"Yeah, but it doesn't work. He's too belligerent to care." My brows rose. This really sucks. I can honestly say that all I want is my father and he's not there for me. It's like he gave up or lost all hope for me. Derek and Jake haven't said anything about my disorder; I know they're thinking about it.
"Penelope's funny. When I called her last night to ask if she wanted to go to the hospital with us, she answered the phone and instantly started cursing me out.
"What the fuck, Derek! It's two in the damn morning! What the hell is wrong with you?" I didn't know what to say."
"Yeah... she's very religious about her sleep." I chortled.
"Obviously," He grumbled. "I got cursed out by a seventeen year old."
"Hola, amiga!" A girly voice came into the room. "Were you guys talking about me?"
"Maybe," I smiled. "Hola, Pen."
"Sup, girly..." She took the heart shaped chocolate lollipop out of her mouth and jumped on Derek's lap. "Hey, Derek…" She drawled out and patted his chest.
"Why are you sitting on me?" He groaned and put his hands on top of his head. She loves messing with him because they hate each other. Not really. "You're seventeen,"
"It bugs you. That's why." She smiled. "I'm sorry for cursing you out. I had a bad night." She pinched his cheek and got off his lap. She kicked off her shoes and climbed on the bed, sitting next to me and biting a piece of the lollipop.
"Why?" I asked.
"Nico snuck into my room... my mother caught him in my closet. She hit him with her belt and then she hit me with it and kicked him out," She said like it was no big deal. We all laughed as she ate her candy in silence.
"How'd he take it?"
"I made it up to him but he doesn't care. That's nothing compared to what would've happened if Jake or Derek found out about Chad sne-" I clamped my hand over her moth quickly and pushed back until her back was on the bed.
"What?" Derek snickered.
"She's rambling." I replied, snatching my hand away from her mouth when she licked it. I shot her a lot and she closed her mouth. They know we were having sex but they don't need to know anything.
"So... what did Chad get you for your birthday?" Jake questioned, pouring a small cup of water for himself.
"A necklace."
"From where?" Penelope grinned and nudged my shoulder.
"Why are you so giddy today?" I looked at her and shook my head. I grabbed her face, opening her eyes so I can look at them. "You're high... your pupils are huge."
"It was a contact high. I didn't actually smoke. Daniel, Travis and Seth were high. I... was just in that vicinity," She explained.
"Your friends smoke weed?" Jake asked in a disapproving tone. "What has society come to?" He exclaimed. "No wonder Sonny's fucked up in the head."
"Nah, Sonny never smoked." Penelope lied, kind of. I always had a contact because of Travis, Daniel and Seth. "Even when every one of us did, she'd leave. She's a good kid,"
"Is it bad that I'd rather you smoked than get pregnant?" Derek threw his hands up. I smirked and folded my legs pretzel style.
"She drank though..."
"Yeah, we knew that Sonny drank. We didn't care about that." Jake waved off. "My sister. California corrupted you." He got up and wrapped his arms around my head. "It's okay, we'll get you away from these stoners."
"Jake... you're a stoner," Derek pointed out. I laughed softly, pushing Jake away from me and hearing him plop in the chair.
"He got her a Tiffany's necklace," Penelope blurted out. I slapped the back of her head and groaned.
"Like a Tiffany & Co, blue box, white ribbon Tiffany's?"
"Mhm."
"Well, Chad has money to blow. At least he's showing you... decent gifts," Jake forced out.
"You don't have to pretend you like him, Jake."
"I hate him but I guess as long as he's treating you like you deserved to be treated, I'll put up with it,"
"I'm so hungry..." Penelope groaned lightly. "I think I saw an Au Bon Pain downstairs, I'll be back." She jumped off the bed, put her shoes on and left the room quickly.
"There's something wrong with her." Derek scoffed. "She's mental..."
"When she's high, she's hyper and giddy."
"But she's like that when she's not high,"
"It enhances everything on her." I shook my head and pressed the nurse button. I had to use the bathroom and needed her to unlock the door.
"Why'd you press the button?" Jake stated.
"I have to pee," I jumped off the bed and went in the direction of the bathroom.
"You need help peeing?"
"I need her to unlock the door. She locks it so I can't..." They nodded because they understood.
"What's up, Sonny?"
"I have to use the bathroom."
"You have a minute... and that's it," I nodded when she unlocked it and closed the door behind me. It would only take me thirty seconds to throw up my food. But she's outside the door and she would hear it. I waited for a moment and actually contemplated on doing it. "I don't hear water hitting the toilet," I rolled my eyes and did what I have to do. I emptied my bladder, washing my hands when I was completely done and shutting off the light. I refuse to look in the mirror. I walked out and heard the door lock behind me. I feel like I'm in jail.
"Wow, she's strict." Jake deadpanned when she left.
"Yeah... where's mom?"
"She had a meeting with the real-estate guy about the house on the beach. She's coming tomorrow morning though,"
"Oh," I sighed. She's not breaking about this divorce thing.
"Did you know that Au Bon Pain has jalapeño corn bread?" Penelope said when she came back in the room with a paper bag and a cup. "It's so good."
"You're so happy for no reason," Jake chuckled.
"I'm happy my best friends okay." She took off her shoes again and jumped on the bed. "Sonny changed my life."
"Aw..." I drawled out.
"The first time I knew that Sonny was a real friend was... when Tawni spilled food on my uniform. She let me take mine off and wear hers while she wore my dirty one." Penelope opened up the bag and took out a load of small bread. She bit into it sighed.
"You're so fucked up." Jake snorted a laugh and shook his head. "You're gonna eat a whole loaf of bread."
"Yes, I am. I'm hungry,"
"She has the munchies..." Derek stated with a laugh.
DEREK POV
I watched Chad walk into the hotel room with a small duffle bag, a pillow and his car keys in his hands. It was getting dark outside and I knew visiting hours were going to be over soon. How do I feel about Sonny dating or sleeping with a older guy? It isn't right. I wish she didn't do it because nothing is going to be the same anymore. She's going to be a mom at seventeen. I think she's too young. Sonny likes playing around and you can't do that with a baby. I just think that she could've waited longer to... lose her virginity. Especially since it was to Chad.
She says she loves him and that he loves her but it's a dangerous romance. Sonny's hurting herself over him. That's beyond dangerous. I don't even know what to say. Life has been turned upside down and inside out. Things will never be the same. He put the bag next to her and exhaled. He looked stressed. Like he was dead tired. I kinda felt for the kid. He found out that Sonny was hurting herself mostly because of him and it looked like it was tearing him up.
"There's just underwear and a few pairs of shorts and a t shirt. There's a blanket folded in there and here's the pillow." He handed it to her.
"Thanks..." She replied, putting the pillow in her lap. It was awkward with Jake and Chad sitting feet away from each other. Jake was tense and Chad was... silent. Sonny just narrowed her eyes at them both.
"Look guys," Sonny started calmly. "If you're going to act like this... then you might as well leave. I need my brother and I need my boyfriend so... you can't hate like this."
"No one's hating. It's Chad giving me the death stare."
"No, I'm fucking not. You're staring me down like a bitch. Say something if you feel that way, Jake."
"You're a fucking rapist." Jake spat out.
"I didn't rape your sister," Chad spat back.
"It wasn't even legal when it first happened, you ass."
"It's legal now. That's all that matters," Sonny pointed out.
"You're a grown man. You couldn't keep your dick in your pants instead of putting it in my sister?" Jake exclaimed but not so loud so the nurses and doctors heard.
"Jake, it happened. Let it go." Sonny stated loudly.
"I'm not going to let it go. It counts as statutory rape,"
Chad stood up and threw his hands up. "I didn't rape your sister. Why don't you fucking get that?"
"Because you're a fucking bastard."
"Guys, stop..." I announced.
"You're a fucking pervert. A cradle robber."
"Shut the fuck up, Jake. I'm not a pervert. And I'm not a fucking pothead like you are." It was so fast how they got in each other's faces. I tried getting between them but they're both like bricks. I couldn't really move them. I just held Jake back by his chest.
"You fucked a sixteen year old. Get the fuck out of my face." Jake growled at him, pushing his chest. Chad pushed him back, grabbing his shirt and pushing him into the wall roughly.
"Guys, stop it!" Sonny jumped off the bed and pushed between them. Jake grabbed Chad's shirt, yanking him to the side also. "Stop!" Sonny was just in the middle; getting pushed around. "Chad, stop..." She groaned, stretching her arms out to get them apart. "Stop it, Jake." Then she just stopped, putting her hands on her stomach and moaning like she was in pain. "Ah… guy's stop," She whimpered, grabbing Chad's shirt and breathing heavy. "Ow," Chad let go of Jake instantly, stepping back like he wasn't just about to fight her brother and lifting Sonny off the ground.
It was inconceivable. It's like he forgot everything and just catered to her. Chad put her on the bed, pressing the nurse button and poured her a cup of water. Penelope just rubbed her arm, soothingly. Jake must've noticed it also because he just watched. It was surreal. It really isn't like Chad to just drop everything and cater to a girl. I've never seen him so careful and attentive to a girl.
He really loves her.
A/N
So… like, love, hate, bored? Review! Tell me what you thought about this chapter! I hope you liked it :) 20 reviews=update. I tried hard to capture the… feelings that a bulimic young woman can feel. Please be honest and tell me. SO yeah… review please and thank you… Chapter 39 coming soon…
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