Author's Notes- I'm keeping this brief, as this chapter is kind of massive. Maybe I'll come back and split this into two chapters later on if it makes the final tally a prettier number, but as it stands, I don't think the second half quite has enough to justify a full chapter to itself. At least there's a lot here to help make up for the wait!

Durotos - No need to feel bad about showing interest in Ann/Jack! Like you said, some of Gray's concerns are legitimate, even if he's not coming from as pure of a place as he acts. Jack would probably be an... easier match, as we'll see. But I don't want to spoil too much!

Chapter Thirty-Five: The Chains

Eventually deciding that no route led to a clear moral high ground, Gray settled on a path of nonintervention with Ann's love life. It was a relapse into old habits, but habits were a familiar comfort when nothing else seemed to piece together. Gray would of course feel saddened for his sister whenever her relationship with Cliff inevitably imploded, but it would be her own undoing at the end of the day. Maybe then Ann would be ready to recognize that, even if his methods were imperfect, Gray had the best intentions for her.

Gray was eager to act like the confrontation with his sister never happened, but Ann had other plans. While headed out for Jack's two days later, Gray spotted Ann and Cliff once again in the pasture together looking after the animals. Not only was Cliff making his dramatic return- he was there early enough to ensure Gray witnessed it, which was something that had been avoided in the past. Gray knew it was Ann's idea since Cliff didn't have it in him to deliberately spite anyone. This pattern continued as Ann became progressively less secretive about Cliff's visits, and soon enough they were common knowledge to the whole town.

Of course, Gray wouldn't let Ann get inside his head, so he went about his normal schedule without interruption. Every day after returning from Jack's, Gray would briefly wave to Ann and Cliff as an acknowledgement before working off on his own.

When her efforts didn't engender the desired response, Ann pushed her luck even further by giving Cliff increasing responsibilities. This culminated with allowing Cliff to exercise and ride Cliffgard, who obviously needed someone to keep him in shape when it wasn't race day, even if it wasn't as intense of a job as training an inexperienced jockey and horse like Jack and Crutcher. Ann had covered this job herself ever since the accident, and Gray saw no need for a change. Gray's resolve almost broke the first time he witnessed Cliff riding their prized champion, but he gritted his teeth and adjusted. When Gray inquired why she ceded these duties to Cliff, Ann claimed that it would be appropriate since the jockey they now had contracted to ride Cliffgard was male. The thought was that Cliffgard might be more comfortable with the jockey if the horse spent more time around men. It wasn't a convincing argument, but Gray held his tongue.

Ann may have goaded Gray with these measures, but it did not develop into sweeping conflict she almost seemed to desire. The two of them were mannered in their conversations, even if they weren't exactly warm. Annoyed as Gray was that this was his sister's response to his concern about her future, it just wasn't worth stooping down to her level.

To Ann's credit, though, she seemed to have kept the conflict private. It was a fear of Gray's that she would start spieling all of her grievances against Gray to the likes of Popuri or Jack. Thankfully, no one seemed to act any differently after the confrontation. Presumably Ann refrained from doing so since interfering with her brother's relationships might come off as hypocritical, but Gray was thankful nonetheless.

This standoff was still ongoing when it came time for the Cow Festival a few weeks later, which was hosted on their property. Like so many of Flowerbud's other festivals, the Cow Festival was centered on a contest- in this case, judging the quality of processed milk. The same gourmet that decided the outcome of the Vegetable Festival acted as the host, but the proceedings here were far more egalitarian. Participants supplied large jugs of milk that could then be poured out into smaller cups that people were welcome to drink from. Unlike the Vegetable Festival, the owners of each jug were kept anonymous and instead assigned numbers. The guests would then be free to vote for the best-tasting milk without bias. According to Doug, the Cow Festival had been held long before the gourmet ever came into the picture, which is why its original traditions were maintained while the newer Vegetable Festival fell victim to his autocratic whims.

The only competitors from Flowerbud were, naturally, a cow from the Green Ranch and Jack's sole cow. The festival drew just enough attention, though, that people from out of town came to compete. Victory in the festival permitted the winner to advertise their victory, which was notable enough to moderately improve their milk brand's value. That winner was almost always the Green Ranch.

Normally, the festival was a high point for Ann and Gray to relish in their perennial victory, but the attitude that year could best be described as an uneasy alliance. They spoke little of the festival at all until that morning at breakfast. In honor of the event, Doug made bacon and scrambled eggs for the family. Everyone kept a steady eye on the window awaiting the arrival of Zack, who was expected at any moment to return with their milk that had been shipped off for pasteurization. Some other activity was already going on outside. The mayor's family was setting up tables and festive decorations, and the noise of an arriving boat ferrying visitors could be heard.

"So, remind me again which cow's milk we're using this year?" Doug asked his children.

"Astrid," Ann answered. "This will be her first time."

"Right. Always good to spread the success, assuming you're confident she will win."

"Oh, she'll win alright."

"What about the competition? Is Jack going to bring something good, Gray?"

Hearing his name, Gray looked up from his food. "Sure. He's asked me for advice on diet, meal times, when to milk and stuff. If he's followed that, he should do fine."

Doug cautioned, "I hope you didn't give too much advice. Nothing wrong with wanting to help a friend, but don't be creating your own competition, either. The bulk of your income comes from this ranch, not Jack's."

Gray grunted but left it at that. It was an obvious jab demonstrating Doug's disapproval of Gray's time spent with Jack, but that was old news. Gray had long since stopped worrying about his father's opinion. Even so, he wasn't eager to listen to it. It was like a housefly- harmless, but obnoxious and difficult to get rid of.

For that reason, Gray was thankful for the approaching sound of creaking wheels bearing a load that bounced with each bump in the road. "That's Zack," he said before bolting his last few bites and heading towards the door. "I'll take care of it."

Zack had already passed the house and was well into the pasture by the time Gray caught up to him. For that final leg of the journey, Gray offered to assist pulling the wooden cart that carried a large cooler, but Zack insisted he had it under control. It was only after reaching the judging table and finding a chance to rest that Zack complained, "People really need to easy up on how much they drink at this thing. I swear, the size of the jugs get larger every year. Getting these things here is gonna required a forklift if they keep it up."

"Maybe you're just getting old and weak," Gray theorized.

"And you'd better watch that tongue of yours," Zack warned menacingly before laughing. "No, the real problem is having to drag around an extra one now that Jack's entered," he explained as he briefly opened the lid on the cooler to reveal two metal vessels.

Gray and Zack then worked together to lift the cooler up onto the table. The milk would be left inside until it was time for the festival to start.

"Think you'll actually stay for the festival, or do you have work to get to?" Gray asked once that was accomplished.

"Well, there's probably other things I should be doing, but I'm stuck here for this one," Zack groaned as he reluctantly lifted the handle to the cart again. "The mayor says I have to help bring up all of the entries coming in from the dock today, and then back down once it's over. I'm not even sure how I'm supposed to get this thing up and down the hill, but I've gotta follow the boss. Apparently there were complaints that we didn't accommodate our guests enough last year."

Gray shook his head sympathetically. "Sorry about that. It's their business if people want to be lazy, but I have no tolerance when they feel the need to drag others into it."

"My thoughts exactly. See ya later, Gray."

With his friend gone and little else to do, Gray headed to the barn. He remained there working on various chores until the volume of voices from outside had grown loud enough that he assumed the event was near ready to start. When he slipped out the barn door, Gray found that festivities had actually already kicked off during his absence. The crowd was impressive; Gray even recognized some of the visitors, which included the likes of a couple of veteran jockeys and even the three women he angered the night before his final race. He made a mental note to avoid them.

Altogether there were seven entries, and no one outside of Zack, the mayor, and the gourmet knew whom each belonged to. People spent some time invested in debating which was the best and tossing votes into a bowl, but people inevitably began to discuss other topics as the festival dragged out. Jeff was the first person to entertain Gray, eager to tell his confidant a story about how he had spent an afternoon with Elli that somewhat resembled a date. The story was a bit of a bore in of itself, and Jeff tried to deduce too much of Elli's feelings based on trivial details. Even so, Gray listened patiently, and he did find some amusement in Jeff's earnestness.

After that, Gray spoke with a few others like Rick, who declared his refusal to drink any of the milk until vetting the pasteurization status of the milk brought by the town's visitors, and Harris, who wanted to give an update on their story and was curious as to whether Gray was interested in reviewing their most recent draft.

Finally he was approached by Jack, who made a motion for a handshake. "May the best rancher win?"

Gray complied. "That's how it should go. Hopefully it's one of us."

"I like the spirit!" Jack's expression then turned serious. "Hey, though... do you mind stepping aside with me, just for a moment? There's something I wanted to ask you about."

Gray nodded his acquiescence, so the two took seats on the pasture fence.

"It's about you and Ann," Jack explained. "I'd heard rumors that the two of you weren't on good terms. Based off what I've seen today, I assume they're true?"

"Why say that? Ann and I haven't even said anything to each other."

"Exactly. That's what is so unusual. I mean, I don't want to be intrusive, but if it's something you want to talk about, I'm here to listen."

Gray wasn't actually that interested in talking about it, but doing so would be a worthwhile gesture of friendship. "... Remember when I ran into you and Ann the day I had that date with Popuri's parents? After you left, Ann and I had an argument over her future with Cliff. She still hasn't gotten over it."

"What did you say to make her so upset?"

"The details don't matter," Gray curtly vocalized out of instinct.

"There's no reason to get defensive. Remember, you don't have to answer."

Gray sighed. "No... no, sorry... you have a right to know..." Though revealing what happened made him feel ill, he expounded, "Truth is, I was trying to set you two up. I said some things about your past that should have been kept private. I know you thought you and Ann was a bad idea. I'm sorry I didn't listen."

Jack shrugged indifferently. "You obviously feel bad about whatever it is you said, which is far more than enough of a punishment."

Sometimes Gray found himself concerned about how imperturbable Jack could be. It would undoubtedly led to him getting taken advantage of. Even so, Gray was thankful for that trait on this occasion. "It's too bad my sister doesn't prescribe to that philosophy."

"She'll come around eventually. You'll see."

Gray wasn't so sure, but he couldn't spell out his doubts before a bell rang to indicate that the festival's results were ready for presentation.

Before heading that way, Jack gave Gray a pat on the back. "We can talk about this more later, but there's no reason to worry about me, alright?" Gray nodded in gratitude.

Once everyone was gathered, the mayor cleared his throat and read out the tallied results.

"And this year's winner, by a margin of five votes, is... Entry 4! Which is, umm..." Mayor Thomas leaned over to the gourmet, who whispered something into his ear. "Astrid, from Green Ranch!" the mayor then finished with gusto.

Per usual, the local attendees cheered, and the visitors grumbled that the system was somehow rigged in favor of the host. Gray, along with his sister and father, had to endure ceaseless rounds of congratulations from the townsfolk, starting with Jack, who appeared genuinely glad for Gray. Seemingly everyone had something to say- all but one person. Popuri was alone walking along the edge of Gray's sunflower patch, running a hand along each stalk as she passed by. By this phase of the season, the flowers of Gray's pet project had fully grown and were in bloom. After finding an opportunity extricate himself from the crowd, Gray approached her.

"Congratulations on the win," Popuri said first. "Sorry if not saying that sooner came off wrong. I was a bit distracted looking at these."

It was obvious that Popuri wanted to talk to Gray alone, not that she forgot. "It's fine," Gray reassured. "I got so many congratulations back there that it's all a blur. I'll actually remember yours."

Popuri smiled and turned back to the sunflowers. "These really are beautiful. I've seen them in passing, of course, but I never got around to basking in them." She poked a finger against a disk of seeds and watched it sway. "I'm glad someone thought to plant them. They really do liven the place up."

There was a pause before Gray admitted, "I lied."

"Hmm?"

"Back when I got the seeds. I wasn't told to buy them. I wanted them, and I'm the one who's been taking care of them."

"I know." Smiling when she saw Gray's astonishment, Popuri explained, "Ann confessed everything a long time ago. But I already had my suspicions. Why are you suddenly so interested in flowers, and why make up a story about it?"

Gray looked at her intently but silently. He hoped that would be enough to convey the idea, but Popuri's body language suggested that she was still waiting for an answer.

"Because I wanted to impress you," Gray said with hesitation. "Ann thought something like this would… win your heart, or whatever. T-that's not the words, it sounds too-"

"- You already have my heart, Gray. But I do love them. So…" she trailed off.

Gray's muscles stiffened. It was just as Harris had described his proposal to Maria. Gray didn't plan for this to be the moment, but it had come all the same. But what would be the result? Things between Gray and Popuri seemed to have been moving along well, but what if Gray had misjudged the situation?

In that moment, though, no trepidation could hold back his words, "I think we should, uhh, get together... as an officially dating thing, you know."

Though visibly enlivened at Gray's suggestion, Popuri could not resist but dryly ask, "And you feel more strongly about it than 'I guess' this time?"

Incisive, but deserving. "Yeah, sorry for being a jerk back there. But I mean this… more than anything. Is… is that alright?"

"I already said you have my heart," Popuri giggled. "Wasn't that clear enough? I could give you a kiss on the check or something if you still need evidence, but I'd need to ask for permission first."

Gray let out a deep breath mixed in with a hint of a laugh. He even smiled. But it didn't take long before Gray was looking over his shoulder to determine if anyone was watching. "I wouldn't mind that, but maybe not here."

"Please don't tell me you want this to be a secret?" Popuri groaned.

"No! It's just… it would be overwhelming if the whole village found out right now. I'd die from embarrassment." He lowered his hat and crossed his arms to signify that he was already embarrassed enough as it stood.

Popuri bit her lip while evaluating whether Gray's excuse was within reason. "Well... I see your point. It would kind of upstage the festival, wouldn't it? Alright. I guess we have no choice but to go back and act normal. Think you'll manage?"

"Will you?"

"Hey!" Popuri objected as they strolled back to the crowd. "Say what you will about me, but I know how to keep a straight face when the time calls for it."

"Is that so? Remember that story about the time you left your garbage can on the mayor's porch instead of the compost he ordered?" When her parents had tried to scold her over the innocent mistake, Popuri only continued to laugh harder each time they insisted that she treat the situation seriously.

"One time, Gray! I was, like, twelve." she defended with a chuckle as she elbowed her companion.

It wasn't overtly romantic, but people already began to whisper amongst each other about the pair just seeing Gray openly laughing and smiling.

The news didn't break at the festival, but it didn't take long after. Gray had time to personally tell his father and sister that he and Popuri were officially dating, which was met with indifference by Ann and a pleased but subdued response from Doug. After that, however, everyone else congratulated Gray on the development before he even had the chance to share it. The transition was going smoother than expected, but if Gray had pictured dating to be dreamy experience, reality didn't wait long to reign his imagination in check. Emblematic of this was the fact that one of his first public appearances with his girlfriend came in the mundane form attending a chapel service together before Sunday brunch.

It was the same weekly ladies' brunch that Ann had dragged Gray into that spring. While Gray's attendance then was met with a sour reaction from Karen and ended rather embarrassingly, his presence this time brought advantages. After getting married, Maria began spending every other week with Harris instead of her friends. When Popuri then shoehorned Gray into this meal, it lost its status as a "girl activity", so Maria in turn felt comfortable bringing her husband as well. It wasn't what it was before, but it meant that Maria was back in full, so no one seemed to mind that much.

Gray sat with Popuri and spent most of the service engaged in intellectual pastimes like analyzing the number and pattern of wooden boards comprising the ceiling. His legs were stretched out and his head hung back slightly in visible boredom, which caught Popuri's disapproving eye on more than one occasion. Last time he was there, he acted a bit more presentable so he had the authority to mock Ann's lack of attention, but he had no such motivation this time. During the brief interlude between the conclusion of Pastor Brown's sermon and Maria's return to the organ for the closing song, Popuri finally whispered, "You could at least act like you are paying attention."

"I've heard of something like this before. It's called missionary dating, or something like that."

"I'm not trying to convert you to anything, Gray. I went to watch you and Jack practice at the track yesterday, but there's not much else for you to tag along with me for. Would you rather watch me water the sidewalk? This isn't that painful, is it?"

"Less painful, more boring."

Seeing that Popuri was a bit annoyed, Gray gave a reassuring smile and took her hand to show that despite his griping, he was still glad to be spending time with her.

Once the song was finished, all of the brunch attendees loitered around to provide Maria time to organize her belongings and talk for a few minutes, so Gray was forced to wait alongside them. While most others went home, Cliff remained sitting alone in the back corner. With little else to do, Gray took a seat next to him. Gray generally didn't talk to Cliff when he was with Ann, but the trainer had no trouble approaching him in private.

Cliff opened his eyes upon hearing Gray's arrival. "Most people don't stop to talk to me when I'm here."

"Guess you could say I'm a bit different from the regular churchgoer." The same could probably be said for Cliff. He attended consistently, but his rough attire and always messy appearance caused him to be rather conspicuous.

"What brings you here, then?"

"Popuri, obviously. You?"

Cliff was so still that it wasn't obvious if he heard the question. He eventually answered, "I don't know. A child's hope, I guess."

Gray could appreciate brevity, but his brief comments were direct, not nebulous like Cliff's. "You'll need to explain more than that."

"Sorry. I mean that maybe by coming to a place like this... I can find some small absolution."

"For what?" Gray hadn't expected this serious of a conversation, but it was the first thing said that morning to pique his interest.

"I... let's say there was someone who needed me, and I let them down. I can't say more. But... I was selfish, and it's too late to undo any of it. I don't know if it's forgivable."

Gray never considered himself much of a counselor, but it didn't take a doctorate to identify that Cliff was far too hung up over one decision. "A single mistake, if that's what it is, doesn't damn you for the rest of your life."

"Why shouldn't it? Look at that statue, Gray." He complied half-heartedly, looking to the statue of the Harvest Goddess that stood within an elevated alcove at the end of the nave. It was less than life-size, but its raised position still allowed it to dominate the space. "Do you think she's made a single mistake? Do you think she wants to be in the presence of anyone who has?"

Gray didn't have a particularly detailed theology organized, so he had no choice but to use arguments based on corporeal experience. "If Ann slights you… would you forgive her?"

"… Of course."

"I bet so. She's probably already done so more than once. And why do you forgive her?"

"... Because it's the right thing to do? Because I care?"

Gray clapped his hands together victoriously. "So you mean to tell me that you, who you believe is capable of horrible things, is able to forgive, but the goddess on that statue won't? They always say how much that thing loves… now you mean to say that she doesn't?"

Cliff's gaze fell the floor. "I know what you're trying to say. But I don't think I can see it like that. It's one thing for a sinner to forgive another sinner. Maybe, deep down, it makes you feel good to see someone else is just as bad as you. You can expect them to forgive your own shortcomings. She can't do that. There is no comparison."

"Sinner? That's not terminology I've heard Pastor Brown often use."

"It's not. Pastor Brown is a good man, and there's a lot to learn from him... but that doesn't mean I agree with everything he says. You can find a lot of different beliefs out there. I only refer to the Harvest Goddess since it's something you will understand."

Gray snorted. "I wouldn't say I understand even that much, so I don't think I can help... especially if you can't be convinced otherwise." Gray cleared his throat and began with a less dreary voice, "Anyways, are you going to join us for brunch? You should be welcome. Ann will be there, of course."

"And everyone else. No, we're avoiding acting, umm, like that for now. Thank you for asking, though." Cliff looked up worriedly at the others in the room. Perhaps in fear that one of them might ask the same question, Cliff hastily stood up and gathered his coat. "I should be going. I'm sorry about dampening the mood. See you later."

As Cliff slipped outside, Gray was left to ponder what had been said. What exactly was Cliff trying to say when he turned down the brunch? The best he could reason out was that he and Ann were trying to avoid looking like a couple. It could be them aiming to avoid going "official" too soon after Gray and Popuri, that one of them had reservations about doing so, or just about anything.

Gray didn't have time to finalize his leading hypothesis before being joined by Pastor Brown, who took a seat next to him without invitation. The pastor wiped his forehead with his sleeve, apparently sweaty and exhausted from preaching and interacting with the public afterwards.

"Sorry, I couldn't help but overhear some of your conversation with Cliff," the pastor said calmly after catching his breath. "I think those were wise words you gave, some that he's been needing to hear. I've tried to get him to see the same, but I haven't had any more success. I'm glad you came today so there is someone besides me repeating the same message... even if I got the impression that you weren't excited to be here yourself."

Gray chuckled. "Not your fault. Blame my nonexistent will whenever Popuri asks me to do something. There's nothing you did wrong, services like this just aren't my thing."

"Don't worry, you're certainly not the first person I've heard say that. If I may ask, though... regardless of your feelings towards me or this chapel, what do you think of the Goddess? Or any other higher being, for that matter?"

"I don't know. Indifferent, I guess."

"Interesting. Your sister mentioned you using less pleasant language about religion in the past."

"... When was this?"

"After your accident. Ann was worried about you, you see. She hardly ever comes to me for advice, but she did then. It might be difficult to appreciate just how much your injury weighed on her."

"I have an idea..." Gray felt a twinge of sorrow for failing to be a better brother time and time again. "I said a lot of stupid stuff then. Just ignore it. I mean what I say now. I'm indifferent."

Pastor Brown rubbed his chin. "I can understand skepticism towards the divine. Doubt it, believe it, be unsure of it... any opinion seems justifiable. But truth be told, if it's the purpose of life, or even eternity at stake, how could you be indifferent?"

The younger man smiled, a bit amused to find himself in another debate. "Alright, fine, you're right. Chalk me up as skeptical, then. But that's just me. I don't really care if anyone agrees or not. That's where I'm indifferent."

"And what has led to your disbelief? Does the divine seem unnecessary to you to explain the natural world?"

Gray shrugged. "Maybe in part, but it's not really that. You can't prove anything one way or the other that way. But it seems to me that if the Harvest Goddess is there, she hasn't done anything for me worth spending this much time showing devotion for."

"And if there was some kind of powerful protector or creator, what makes you think it has a responsibility to be beholden to you, and not the other way around?"

"Because I didn't ask to be made, nor do I claim to be some sort of 'mother of the harvest', or anything else..." Gray shook his head and said with somewhat less welcoming tone, "Sorry, but I don't think this conversation is going anywhere."

Thankfully, the pastor knew when a conversation was over. "No, it's quite alright. I'm sorry if I've asked too many questions. I just see it as my responsibility to try to understand everyone who lives here so I know how to best address these topics with them. Thank you for saying as much as you have. And again, thank you for speaking with Cliff. I hope you'll do so again."

With those final words, Pastor Brown stepped outside, perhaps for lunch or a walk. Even though Maria was ready, the ladies were still engaged in a conversation that Gray would have preferred they saved until after ordering food. Even Harris appeared worn out, who was now sitting alone reading a newspaper. Not wanting to distract Harris or get dragged into whatever discussion was going on, Gray instead wandered the aisles of the chapel alone. The building was old, and it both looked and smelt it, but there was a certain charm that not even Gray would deny. There was a musty smell in the air that Gray had an odd soft spot for, and on a chilly morning, the furnace in the corner radiated a pleasant warmth that felt like a blanket.

It all seemed homely, with a single exception- the statue of the Harvest Goddess that overlooked the entire hall. From a distance, its surface appeared to be solid gray stone, but at a closer inspection, Gray realized it was in fact comprised of countless small granules, each with a unique hue and shape. One could spend a lifetime studying its details.

Still, the overall product was a mimicry of a being that was cold, lifeless, and unmoving. Her frozen eyes never ceased their judging gaze upon those below her.

Despite trying to encourage Cliff, Gray could somewhat understand where he was coming from, even if his issues led to disbelief rather than despair. Gray attended church with his parents more regularly as a child, and he could recall that the old man who served as the pastor always focused on how the Harvest Goddess would bless their community and crop yield if they acted purely and always kept her in mind with praise and offerings. That all sounded nice, but it also left unspoken implications about what would happen if they failed to do so. Considering that the question of what counted as enough "good" was open-ended, Gray couldn't help but fear for the worst outcome. Who said the Harvest Goddess had the right to determine what was good, anyways?

And yet, he knew that in the eyes of another, that statue was resolute, graceful, and ever present, with vigilant eyes always receptive to those she watched over.

"Gray, we're ready to go!" Popuri called out, abruptly shaking him from his thoughts.

After being beckoned, Gray took one last glance at the statue. He then subtly shook his shoulders, put his hands in his pockets, and followed the others outside.