"Kid, when are you going to uncover my eyes?"

"Right about… now!"

The blackness lifted from Liz' vision, and she saw a incredibly fancy French restaurant.

"You managed to get reservations at 'Mon Canard Est En Feu'? Kid, this is the fanciest restaurant in Death City!" gushed Liz.

"Well, I didn't really get a reservation, but all the booths at Mcdonalds were taken…" joked Kid. Liz threw her arms around him. "You're so SWEET!" she cried as she grabbed his hand and practically dragged him into the restaurant.

Inside, the waiting room was packed. "Aw, it's gonna take until dawn to get a table!" Liz moaned.

"Relax, Liz. Watch this." Kid strolled over to the receptionist, who was scribbling something down, and tapped him on the shoulder. The man looked up impatiently, glaring, but his glare turned into a slack-jawed expression of terror at the sight of Death's son. Immidiately, he forced a phony smile to his face, and gestured to the room of tables.

Kid and Liz followed the waiter past packed tables. He led them to a untaken booth, but before they sat down, Liz noticed him quickly whisk away a "reserved" sign. Apparently somebody wasn't getting their table tonight.

As the waiter scurried away, Liz relaxed in the cushy seat. Kid, of course, kept his posture flawless as he picked up his menu and perused it.

"So," said Kid, staring at the menu. "What would you like? They have lobster, caviar, endangered bird eggs…"

"What, we aren't going to make conversation first?" asked Liz, raising an eyebrow.

Kid looked up at her. "Um…" he thought for a second, before saying, "You look nice tonight."

"Aw, thanks! You look good, too!" Liz replied, smiling.

Kid was silent for another few seconds, before shrugging and saying, "That's my entire repertoire of conversation starters. I could ask you about the weather, but I have a feeling that that isn't a wise decision."

Liz laughed. "It's ok, Kid. I know you don't get out much." She said gently.

"So, um… what do YOU want to talk about?" asked Kid politely.

"Ooh, that's a toughie!" said Liz, putting a finger to her chin. "Well, there's this new lipstick from glamour girl which just came out, and it's supposed to make your lips garunteed match your eyes. Then there's this mascara which…"

xxxxxxxx

15 minutes later…

"Oh, and so Stacy says, 'oh no you di-int!', and Marie says, 'Oh yes I di-id!'" Liz continued to yammer on as Kid watched and listened politely, his head resting on his fists. This was only a shell, though. Inside his brain, he was banging his head on a wall from sheer boredom.

"Is monsieur ready to order?" asked a waiter, coming over to them.

"Um, yes, I'll have a bourbon '79 red wine, please." Said Kid.

"And mamousielle…" asked the waiter, turning to Liz.

"And Britney's like, 'she didn't!' and Michelle's like, 'she did, I swear!'" Liz continued to yammer, oblivious to the waiter.

"She'll have a lemonade." Said Kid, reciting Liz' favorite drink. "Oh, and if you will, waiter… be a good man and flavor my drink with a large dose of cyanide, will you?"

"Fresh out, monsieur."

"aw, $#it."

Xxxxxxxx

Another 40 minutes later…

"And so I decided to get the blue dress, not the red one! Isn't that CRAZY?" laughed Liz.

"It sure is, Liz!" replied Kid, laughing as well, even though he had no idea what the hell she was talking about.

"I know, right! And so – aw, geez." Liz cut herself off and put a hand on her stomach. "Kid, I've got to go powder my nose, if you don't mind."

"Why? You look absolutely beautiful just the way you are!" said Kid, smiling obliviously.

"Ok, first, I'm flattered. Second, 'powder my nose' is girl code for 'I need to poop really bad.' Just for future reference." Said Liz quickly.

"Ah, well why didn't you say so? Go right ahead!" said Kid. Liz scurried off, and Kid sighed. He missed her already.

"Here-a is-a your-a food-a! guten tach!" said a ridiculously accented voice as Liz's and Kid's food was set on the table. Liz had buttered lobster. Kid had roast duck.

"Thanks, I-" said Kid, turning to the waiter, then he froze. His eye twitched.

The waiter may have worn the same outfit as the rest, and had a hat and a big poofy white moustache, but there was no disguising that bouncy blonde hair, or those big blue eyes.

"PATRICIA!" Kid nearly screamed. "How did you- what are you-"

"Who eez thees Patreecia?" said Patty in a heavy French accent, looking around. "I am not of seeing zee Patreecia!" said Patty, turning back to Kid and shrugging.

"Oh really?" asked Kid, amused at this little charade. "See, I'm not really buying it, because before you spoke in a German accent, and now you speak with a French one.

"Crikey, you're a perceptive one, aint'cha?" said Patty. "I just so happen to come from exactly between the two, mate!"

"Mmm-hmm." Said Kid, his head on one fist. "See, now it's Australian, Patricia. Pick one and stick with it."

"Arr, but they all be so fun to speak in, matey!" said Patty. She began to sing "A pirate's life for me", but stopped when Kid reached out and plucked off her moustache. "Hey, gimme that back!" said Patty in her regular voice, reaching for the moustache.

"Dammit, Patty, how'd you even get here at all?" asked Kid as he put the moustache in his pocket, pulled a pen out, and began to scribble something on his napkin.

"Rule of funny." Replied Patty brightly.

"Rule of… what?" asked Kid as he finished scribbling and placed the written-on napkin in front of Liz' place. "That's it, I'm driving you home."

Kid then stood up and grabbed Patty's ear. He proceeded to drag her out the door. "Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!" griped Patty as she was dragged out the door.

Not a minute later, Liz had returned from the bathroom. "That's much better." She whispered to herself as she sat down. Then she looked around, and said out loud, "Hey, where's Kid?" Then she looked down and saw the napkin.

"Hey, Liz" it read.

"I believe I forgot to fold one of the toilet paper rolls at home. I'll be back in a few minutes. Thanks for understanding. Love, Kid."

Liz sighed as she pulled over her lobster and began to crack it open. "At least he restrained himself until I went to the bathroom." She thought to herself as she took a bite of lobster.