Now that I'm done with Stevenbomb 3.0 and a birthday present one-shot, it's time to update!

I have to tell you guys that I had finished about half of this fanfiction and I am thinking of a sequel for this fanfiction where I can give some answers to some of the mysteries in here –especially with Jake. But for now, I need to finish this fanfiction.

And by the way, Elarel, yes there is a Steven Universe reference and please, take your time with translating.

Pro XI: Physical Training

"Fuck!"

"…Get up and hold your sword tighter." Bro said.

Dave wants to flip him off but he gets his sword and tries to stand up. There is no way he isn't going to give up! He will be stronger!

And he will stop having Bro smirking down at him!

Dave tries to ignore the annoying pain on his right foot. He leans on his left and glare at Bro. He tries to get a tight grip but his hands are shaking too much. Scheiße! He's going to get his ass beaten up again!

"Dude, don't look like you're in pain. The enemy and target will take on full advantage on that." Bro sighs and gets out of his battle stance. "Let's call it quits, I got a date anyway."

Dave stares at Bro. Did he really just do that?! He thought it was going to be over soon! Arschloch!

But Dave takes advantage of the whole Bro leaving him alone and takes a breath and lie down on the ground. Fuck, everything fucking hurts…

He will get a glass of apple juice after he gets up…

Dave takes a deep breath in and slowly gets up. His right foot still hurts like a bitch. Dave has to put his weight on his left foot and his sword to stand up. Fuck, he wants to get stronger sooner!

Dave breathes out a big sigh. He needs to get inside and walk–Verdammt! Scheiße! Scheiße! Scheiße!

…Dave needs to ironically limp to get inside…

Dave opens the door and takes the elevator. There is no way he's going to take the damn stairs. And thank fuck that there's no one but him and his sword in this elevator…

The elevator dings and Dave ironically limps out of the elevator and into their apartment. Dirk is busy with working on a homemade stun gun while ironically watching My Little Pony. Dave needs to go to the weight room…

"Sup, did Bro kick your ass already?" Dirk questions without looking away from the TV.

"…not really, he ditched me for some date. We might need to get some of that custom-made ear muffs… I call the pink Foxy Lady ones." Dave answers.

Dirk snorts, "Fine, the plaid faux is ironic too. Are you going to do weights again?"

Of course, his right foot had to hurt like a complete bitch near Dirk… And now Dirk takes his eyes away from the TV and actually looks at Dave. Great, now Dirk sees his right foot…

"…Der Verdammte Scheiße, Mann!" Dirk shouts out. "Your foot is fucked up!"

Huh? Dirk isn't poking fun at his failure?

"For fuck's sake, sit the fuck down now!"

Dave ironically limps to the couch. Luckily there are some weights near the couch. But they are training weights… They really don't have any… weight really…

But what the hell, Dave has nothing to do. He puts his sword on the ironic coffee table and does some weights. He needs to get stronger and definitely quicker next time. Maybe he should adjust his footings and learn some acrobatic skills. There's always ballet.

"How the fuck in all things shitty and ironic did you get your foot this messed up?"

Dave rolls his eyes and doesn't answer Dirk's angry question. Maybe he should steal some money and ironically take ballet class. The dudes and women are hot to look at. And what's more ironic than wearing tights and having a pretty frilly pink tutu on?

"Maybe that's why Bro left. He saw that fucked up foot of yours…" Dirk mumbles.

"Hey," Dave responds, "Maybe it's because Bro has his bedazzled thong on and is ready to be rejected by fedora man for the billionth time."

"Actually it's a billion and second time." Dirk says as he inspects the wound. "You need to learn how to count again…"

Dave does want to respond with the needed sass and irony but –FUCK A DUCKING FUCK! THAT SHIT HURTS! FUCK! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

"I swear, bro, you need to be more careful. You want to kill your enemy –not get killed by the enemy." Dirk says.

Dave rolls his eyes. He'll get them. He'll make sure no one messes with him.

Dave spits out the blood that's been clogging up his nose. Scheiße, this guy is tough! Of course the way over buff muscles aren't for show.

"You're the fucker that's gonna kill me?" The douche laughs out.

No, Dave's the fucker who's going to sell him Girl Scout cookies. And Dave seriously needs something sharp to shut this asshole up.

Dave dodges to the right, getting away from dickhead's beefy fist. Fuck! His right foot isn't fully recovered yet! But he won't show it.

Dave flash-steps behind the guy and attacks him from the back. Dave puts his arm around the guy's neck and tries to strangle him.

Of course, this isn't like the movies and the dude is trying to kill him. He easily removes Dave's unprepared one-arm strangle. Dave uses both of his arms to strangle him.

The fucker swiftly moves back and hits Dave with a damn wall.

Dave spits out a curse and tries to ignore the annoying ringing and pain in his head. He tries to hold on. But unfortunately this is reality.

The musclehead used both of his hands and threw Dave over and away from him. And Dave cursed as he crashes onto trash cans.

"You fucking shithead! The fuck does a little bitch like you come here and try to fuck me up?" Dave doesn't answer. "Did one of the bitches send you?"

Dave seriously wants to flip him off. But fuck! He damn hurts!

Dave tries to catch a breath but a foot is jabbed to his gut. And he repeatedly kicks in the gut.

Ugh! Motherfu–! Scheiße! Dave tries to cover his gut away from the kicking.

Dave feels like his eyes are bleeding and ready to pop out. Dave tries to blink. His sight blurring in and out…

He feels too lightheaded and his head ready to explode…!

Dave tries to move his other hand –tries to reach for something…

Dave flinched at the discovery of something sharp prick his finger. Dave forces himself to blink to have a clearer vision. It's… It's broken glass… It's good enough for a knife.

Dave doesn't think. He immediately tries to get up and ignores the stinging punch in his lungs as he stabs the man. There's a scorching stab on his hand as he keeps holding on the sharp broken glass.

Dave feels dizziness consuming him. The ringing is deafening him. But he sees red.

Dave doesn't think. He dodges the kick, the punch, and the tackle. Dave flash-steps and he jumps. The screaming is helping to quiet the screeching ringing. There are successful and weaker hits on Dave but Dave doesn't feel. He stabs. He bashes and slits and slashes and stabs!

The rush pumping through his entire body as Dave slices, cuts, and ends this fucker.

Dave immediately stops by a whistle. He blinks and smears off some blood off of him with his arm. He feels himself flinch and tense as he can feel both his hands bleeding and hurting. It feels like they're tearing and oozing out from their sliced and stabbed wounds from the glass.

Dave turns his head and sees Bro, amused.

"…So you cut him and yourself to overpower the guy? Risky but it's ironic." Bro says and then looks at Dave's hands. "Need to get them fixed though."

Dave just nods and stares down at his hands. He couldn't risk losing his weapon so he used both of his hands to hold the glass. He watches his blood get out of his hands, feeling the ripping sting as drops of blood get out. His hands tense and twitch at the pain but Dave doesn't cry.

He feels satisfaction that he killed the dude and annoyed at the pain on his hands.

Dave stands up and follows Bro to the car. Great, Dirk is going to panic a shit ton… He doesn't look weak but damn! His hands hurt like an asshole fucking bitch!

"Dave," Bro says. "You succeeded but be careful. Don't let looks fool you."

Dave rolls his eyes. "Really, you're giving me cheesy ironic advice to me now?"

But Bro just smirks, "You'll see."

…Was zum Teufel ist passiert?!

Seriously, what the hell happened?!

A big buff guy was chasing John and then Dave couldn't see what they were doing and –that musclehead asshole was thrown like he was nothing!

What the fuck?! Did Dave somehow have gotten high or shit?

This water pouring on him must be laced with something because–

"Thtrider! We got everything we need! What the hell are you thtaring at?"

"Dave! Bro! Seriously, what's going on?"

Dave turns his head and was about to say something but–

Bang! Bang!

Who the hell is shooting?!

"Jake?!"

"Englith?!"

Holy fuck, English came out where John and muscle-fuck were! Did English… do that to the guy…?

Was Ampora really telling them the truth about English being an actual soldier?!

Is what Bro meant when he gave that shitty and cheesy advice to Dave…?

Is English more than this psycho guy who is a good fighter and obsesses over his deceased niece…? And–

Whoa! English is moving! Quick and shooting with ease! Where is he going? What is he–?

"Wait! Where ith Ampora?!"

…Oh shit…

Oh Scheiße!

"E.D.!"

And the chase is on.

Next chapter is a Con with Jake. And let's just say that Jake doesn't exactly like Eridan –especially trying to have one of his goons harm the Striders only for Jake to stab the guy's neck and lose his glasses privilege.