Rifiuto: Non Miriena
A/N: Written: 2005, Found: 2018.- Licia
She felt him curl around her, burying his face in her hair.
Without a word, she reached up, stroking his cheek before allowing sleep to claim her once again. The fire in the fireplace still burning in the grate, warming the whole room, and yet she still burrowed further in the blankets, feeling him tighten his arms around her in his sleep. The season was just starting to slip into autumn, a time when all of Fliaan would burst into beautiful, warm colors, when marriages were at times taking place and the harvests were being stored away for winter.
A time when new life was forming for many women who found themselves in condition again.
After a moment, she slipped out of his arms, pulling her robe on over her pajamas and slipping out of the room. She made her way to the nursery to check on her son; her other children slept soundly, leaving the palace quiet. The nursery door shut softly behind her, and she made her way to the crib, to check on the little prince. The seven-month-old opened his eyes as his mother lifted him from the crib, before yawning and returning to sleep as she took a seat in the rocking chair.
"You will be a big brother, Kio." She whispered, watching her son sleep contentedly in her arms. "Daddy and I conceived in late August, so in seven months, your new little brother or sister will arrive. I pray to the Unnamed God I do not bear another son."
The little boy had shown that he also was afflicted with the disease his brother had- when he'd bumped into something while crawling a month ago, for he'd started crawling midway through six months- and had experienced the same symptoms his brother had. It had set both Elphaba and Trism on edge; clearly, none of her sons were immune to this disease, and all the young royal could do was pray that her sons would heal quickly and suffer little. She had spent her childhood listening to her brother's cries and screams from the pain, and the last thing she wanted was for her sons to experience the same pain as their uncle had.
"Trism doesn't mind that you're pregnant again?" She looked up, meeting Sophelia's gaze. "I'd be worried if I were him."
She chuckled softly. "We discussed it. If I'm willing, he's willing. Besides, he wants a big family."
"But eight children? Even Mama and Papa decided that five was enough."
"Because they finally had their son." Elphaba whispered, and after a moment, Sophelia nodded. "Once Shell was born, they stopped. They didn't need to try anymore."
"And you and Trism do? Fabala, you have already proven that you can conceive and bear children. And you have given birth to two sons. There is no need to try anymore."
"We're not trying, Elia. It just happens. Besides, I quite enjoy the act of making them." Her sister made a face, cringing.
"On all fours like a dog. Disgusting. Mama did not raise you to act like a mongrel off the street, Fabala. You're a princess." She watched her little sister's cheeks flush red.
"And an empress, as well as a queen, Elia. Or have you forgotten?" Her sister had the decency to look ashamed. "Had you lived, I think you would have enjoyed the act as well."
"Nessa was alive, and she did not enjoy it." Sophelia whispered, and Elphaba took a deep breath.
"Nessa was taken by a grown man against her will." Elphaba replied, her little sister's screaming ringing in her head. She'd known what was happening, even though she hadn't looked back. She would never forget her sister's screams as long as she lived.
"And you are different to Nessa." She nodded at her sister's glare. "Of course you are. You are doing this of your own will, becoming with child and then bearing them, like a-"
"A breeding cow." Both sisters turned to Oziandra, arms crossed over her chest. "Honestly Fabala, you are going to wear your body out-"
"All I ever wanted was to be a mother, Raina, you know that. I wanted thirty children. I may not become a mother to thirty, but I will become a mother to eight." She stood, returning her sleeping prince to his crib, a hand moving to caress her belly once she straightened. Already, she was starting to show. "I want these children, Raina. I want them more than I've ever wanted anything. I want to raise them differently to how we were raised, and watch them grow into their own personalities and their own minds. I want to watch them become men and women of their times, like we would have been, had we all survived. I will not make the same mistakes with my children that Mama made with us." She met her sister's gazes. "These are my children. This is my time. I..." She swallowed, tears in her eyes. "I will not allow myself to repeat Mama's mistakes." She felt her sisters' arms around her, holding her close.
She slowly cradled her belly, her sisters' words ringing in her head. Oziandra might be right; she might very well wear her body out, but she would wear her body out becoming what she had dreamed to be from the time she was a child- a mother. She would wear her body out growing and bearing the very things she had longed to have from age six. She loved her children- each with their own personality, including the twins- and she loved the baby growing within her.
"You are so loved, little one. Daddy and I, and your brothers and sisters, we all love you and we will always love you. You will never lack or want for love, not ever. I promise. We will love you forever. I will love you until I draw my last breath, and even after, I will love you. You will never lack for love in this home or this family."