NEW CHAPTER! NEW CHAPTER! To celebrate the coming Easter (and my holidays!) here's a new chapter! So sorry about this but like last time – at least 12 new reviews before I start thinking about updating!
There's an important information in the Author's note section so be sure to read that!
Disclaimer – Blah, blah – do you have to make me say it?
Across the Worlds
Chapter 38: Where it hurts
. . . . . . . . . . . .
"Peter, you can't," Susan said gently but with all the firmness of an unmoveable mountain.
"But…" the High King looked around desperately for support but he was backed into a corner all by himself, "You…"
"You're injured boy," Jason rumbled, "That makes you a liability."
"JASON!" Susan snapped furious.
The Seeker grunted and fell silent as Peter flinched, stung. Susan watched with bated breath waiting for him to explode, for him to yell and scream but his next move scared her more than anything else he could've possibly done.
"Oh."
An anguished look came over his face and the High King turned and walked slowly out of the room, shoulders slumped. His exit left a dead silence in the air. Susan watched him go, mouth agape as Zaru and Inara glared daggers at the Seeker.
"Remind me to never get you involved in any sort of hostage negotiation," the leopard spat.
"What? It's the truth!" Jason rumbled, "He's injured. He can't hold a sword or fight? What good is he to us?"
"Is that it huh?" Inara spat, "As soon as someone can't fight we just dump them on the curb?"
Jason blinked surprised at the vehemence in her words.
"No! That's not what I'm saying!" he protested.
"Well, what are you saying?" Inara snarled venomously, "That we all have to pull our fighting weight around here or it's bye, bye?"
Jason flushed and opened his mouth, an insult at tip of his tongue but Susan stepped in hurriedly.
"Not helping!" she snapped.
She threw one last worried glance at the open door and resolved to talk to her brother as soon as possible but first she had to be the leader.
"We need a plan and fast," Susan snapped," Bickering is not going to solve our problems!"
She glared at Jason and Inara until both of them closed their mouths and sat back down.
"Okay, we need a way to get in," Susan said quickly," Inara. How good are you at acting like a crazy person?"
Zaru laughed as Jason and Elias hid a snigger. Inara glared at them all as she jabbed Zaru in the side with her toe. She turned to Susan.
"I'm your girl," Inara promised.
"Okay, Jason you'll go with Inara… pretend you're a policeman or someone who's taking her into the asylum. That's our way in," Susan continued, "Professor?"
Professor Kirk looked at her.
"Can you write some sort of formal letter pretending to be a doctor admitting her?" she asked.
Professor Kirk nodded eagerly, a devilish grin on his face. Polly Plummer watched, fascinated and somewhat surprised to see Susan dealing with her people. The selfish brat that she gotten so used to was gone and a true Queen of Narnia had taken place in this self-assured woman with sparking blue eyes and firm voice. Polly smiled grateful that Susan had pulled herself out the dark hole she had been in before.
She had heard from Peter and Edmund and Lucy about Susan's second stay in Narnia and her… uhh… cavorting with a certain Prince. It didn't take a lot of brains or intuition to see that had been the source of all of Susan's troubles. And as Polly's eyes now settled on the handsome young man sitting across from her, the old woman felt a deep sense of unease at the brooding look in Caspian's eyes as he gazed upon the supposed love of his life.
"So, me and Cowboy huh?" Inara shot Jason a dirty look, "Think that's going to do it? I can't bring in a weapon and Cowboy can only carry so many daggers."
"I can join you…" Susan began.
"No, you're not," Elias cut in firmly, "There's a possibility the people going in might not get out. And we need you, you're staying here."
"I will go then," Caspian said quickly.
Susan looked to him surprised but Caspian looked squarely back at her, dark eyes unreadable.
"If you are to stay, I will go," he said bluntly.
Polly felt her breath left her lungs at the implication in those words. Susan started, a pain look crossing her face but she quickly covered it up, nodding, hiding behind her role as leader.
"If you want," Susan glanced at the trio, "I'll leave you three to sort out the finer details?"
They nodded as Susan carefully avoided Caspian's eyes, her heart clenching as she tried desperately to work out what was so very wrong between them. Tears threatened to fall but she did not let them spill, there was no time or luxury for crying that would come later in the privacy of her room and the night.
"Good," Susan said in a barely steady voice, "Now if you'll excuse me I have something I need to attend to."
. . . . . . . . . . . .
She found him in the tiny garden sitting on the damp grass and staring blankly at the rotting fence before him.
"Maybe he's right," Peter said in a voice that sounded alien to him.
Susan stopped, suddenly feeling very cold. During the golden years of their reign she had seen her brother at the height of his magnificence and at the darkest of his despairs. She had seen him after skirmishes and walls where many of his men had fallen, she had seen him after fires and disasters had laid waste to their people's homes and bodies littered the ground but never, even after the greatest of tragedies had she ever heard him sound so very defeated.
Her heart broke for him.
"He's not," Susan said softly.
Peter laughed bitterly.
"I think he is."
She noticed that he was gingerly massaging his arms, his useless almost-dead arms.
"Peter…"
"Don't say it Su," he said roughly still refusing to look at her, "Don't say it."
She said it anyway.
"It's going to be alright, you know that right?"
"How?"
He turned to her, eyes blazing.
"How?!" he barked.
He shoved her blackened, infected hands and arms towards her.
"Look at these!" he yelled, "Look at them! How can things be alright? I can't pick up a sword, I can't fight… by the Mane! Su I can barely pick up a cup of water without shrieking in agony!"
He slumped back, chest heaving, broken and lost.
"Su I used to be a warrior. I led men into wars and fought my way to victory. I was a knight… now I'm nothing."
A spark of fury leapt into Susan's chest and all her fears and doubts poured into it, feeding it as it sprung from a candle flame into an inferno. It leapt into her eyes and she screamed wordlessly to the world. If her brother the most strongest, stalwart, stubborn person she knew gave up hope… she just couldn't bear it.
"Stop it!" she screamed at her, "STOP IT! You think we followed you, we looked up to you as High King because you could swing a sword? Any brute could do that! We followed you because you were a leader! You never gave up! Even when everyone else was willing to throw their hands up in defeat you pressed on! That's why you were king because you made the rest of us strong!"
She grabbed him, shaking him, angry tears spilling down her face.
"Peter! Please…" she begged, "I need you."
He pushed her hands away and turned around staring at the wall.
"I… I don't know if I'm strong enough. Not for this," he looked down at his hands once more as they convulsed wildly beyond his control, "Not this."
"Peter… there's thousands of worlds. Surely one of them… we find a way. We will find a cure," Susan said desperately trying to break through to him.
His laugh was sad.
"Su. The Great Darkness did this. The one that's taking over all the worlds. I don't think there's anything strong enough to break the curse," he said flatly.
"Peter. Please don't give up," Susan begged, she needed her pillar, her rock.
He fell silent refusing to acknowledge her, still absently rubbing his arms.
"Peter…"
"Go. Just go," he said softly, "Please?"
She bit her lip drawing blood, torn, not sure if she should push or retreat, not sure if she could make him stronger or break him altogether.
"Okay," she whispered, "I'll –"
Her voice broke and she turned and ran just as lightning split the sky and rain began to fall. She dashed inside, tears and rain mixing on her face as Peter sat outside, drenched to the bone yet too numb to move.
Upstairs Inara stood at the window looking down at the broken High King with a terrified look on her face.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Lucy danced around her, her face wild with joy.
"Ring around the rosies," Lucy sang, echoing countless childhood moments when Susan had danced with her singing the same nonsense song, "A pocket full of posies."
She was standing in an open field, surrounded by frolicking satyrs and fauns, ribbons streaming in their wake in an ecstasy of colour.
"A ti-shoo!" Lucy laughed, boisterous and unrestrained, "A ti-shoo!"
The tableau froze and everyone seemed to swivel towards her, staring at her with wild open, terrified eyes.
"We all fall down."
Susan turned to look at her sister and screamed as she stared at the rotting face, maggot-ridden, black oozing dripping from empty eye sockets. Lucy reached towards her with a skeletal hand, her mouth opened as dirt and worms dribbled from her shrivelled lips. The voice that came from her was deep and guttural and shook the world.
"We all fall DOWN!"
Susan shot up in bed, a cry on her lips.
"ENEMIES!?" Zaru was on his feet and hissing violently, hackles raised, "WHERE?!"
"SHINK!"
Susan turned and Inara's sword was out, glistening in the gloomy light of dawn. The girl was trembling but her eyes blazed like embers in the darkness.
"Susan!?" Elias's concerned voice was at the closed door echoed closely by Professor Kirk's.
Susan flushed, embarrassed.
"Nothing!" she called, "Just a dream!"
She shuddered at the memory of her sister's rotting face and shoved it from her mind, warding it off with a quick whispered prayer to Aslan. Inara and Zaru watched her carefully like scientists peering at an experiment.
"What?" she asked uncomfortable.
"Is it… uh…" Zaru coughed delicately, "One of those dreams?"
"What does that mean?" Susan demanded.
"It means before we found Petey you were mumbling his name a lot in your sleep. And before we got Shaggy you kept waking up calling him," Inara said bluntly, "Those dreams."
"Oh," Susan swallowed thickly, "I don't know where they come from… but I see things."
A short silence descended onto the room as Susan carefully avoided their eyes, afraid of what they might say.
"So can you tell what we're having for lunch?" Zaru asked suddenly.
Susan stared at him.
"Idiot!" Inara scolded, "Don't waste her powers like that."
She turned to Susan smirking.
"So Queenie… what're the lottery numbers?" Inara asked.
Susan rolled her eyes as Inara and Zaru sniggered.
"Fools," Susan huffed as she laid back down throwing her blankets over her face.
She fell asleep to the sounds of laughter and with a smile on her face.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
"Wait! So if an atom was to split in the proper conditions…" Professor Kirk said excitedly.
"The energy released would be sufficient to power an entire city for a year," Elias nodded, "But the conditions at which it takes place must be incredibly precise. For example the element neptunium…"
"Nerds," Inara muttered disgusted.
"Oh hush!" Polly scolded.
Briskly she applied the make-up brush to Inara's face deliberately making her pale, streaks of darkness under her eyes to make her look haggard. Her hair was in a mess, a wild tangle that suited the derelict state of her clothes.
Susan watched Polly dab more white onto Inara's cheeks and couldn't help but shudder. Once she had lived and died by the make-up brush but now the very sight of it made her feel very small and ashamed.
She glanced across the room and hid a smile as Jason tugged uncomfortably at the rough white shirt he had on, a scowl firmly on his face. Out of his usual fedora and battered coat, the Seeker looked almost vulnerable in his new outfit. The fierce glare he sent her way as Susan smirked at him quickly reminded her he was as deadly and as gruff as ever.
Her eyes drifted to Caspian and even with all the confusion and hurt that swamped her every time she looked at him she couldn't help but admire the way he looked in clothes from her world. A hand swept through his wavy hair (a duel had almost sprung forth when Polly suggested cutting his hair to help him blend in) and Susan felt a rush of heat surge through her as she remembered the feeling of those rough palms on her bare skin. The hungry, adoring look in his eyes and the feel of his lips and teeth on her…
Susan shuddered as Zaru sneezed picking up on the complex bouquet of smells that flowed from her.
Caspian's eyes caught her own and a shutter fell over them. Ice pierced her and a wave of… wrongness swept through her. It was like an oil slick, dark and infectious. Susan felt like she was drowning, falling into a hole of utter darkness as she screamed silently for help but none would hear, none would come. Caspian sucked in a breath and turned away and the moment passed. Susan collapsed back into her chair, one hand over her racing heart as she gasped for breath frantically trying to figure out what had just happened.
A wet warmth touched her other hand and Susan looked down to see Zaru gently licking her finger. Susan smiled, love for the leopard surging through her.
"Zaru…" she whispered.
"It's okay," the leopard whispered back, "It's my duty… and pleasure."
Susan laughed and gently scratched his ears as the leopard purred.
"Where's Peter?" she asked.
Zaru opened one eye and sniffed the air.
"Upstairs… and he hasn't changed."
"I don't know how to pull him out," Susan confessed quietly as Elias and the Professor continued to natter at each other about equations and theories, "I don't know how to help him."
"I don't think you can," Zaru said gravely, "It's up to him now. He'll break or he'll strengthen and it'll be up to him."
Susan sighed sadly.
"Done!" Polly announced.
Elias and Professor Kirk ignored her.
"So the grand unification of all four forces that govern our physical world…" Kirk began.
"Cannot be completed until the fifth force has been uncovered and that cannot be done until the birth of particle accelerators. From the destruction of a single nucleus of…" Elias explained, his eyes ablaze as he found a kindred spirit in his search for knowledge.
"So have you simpletons got it?" Polly demanded.
Inara, Jason and Caspian all bobbed their head quickly. Susan watched, amused as Polly made them all repeat their instructions. The old woman with her prim hair and clothes was the image of a motherly matron but the look she bent upon the trio was almost draconian in nature, the fierce look on her face daring any of them to cross her. She even managed to keep Inara and Jason's mouths shut which was, Susan noted wryly, a Herculean task that almost deserved sainthood.
"So you two will lead her to the fronts door and announce you are transferring her from another institution," Polly continued, "Inara will be hand-cuffed…"
"WHAT?!" Inara squawked.
Jason barked with laughter as Inara glared at him.
"Pervert!" she snapped.
"You're a bit too young for my taste," Jason shot back, "And skinny."
"HEY!"
Caspian roared with laughter as Inara and Jason continued to bicker, the scowl on Polly's face deepening as her fingers twitched, ready to smack some sense into the two of them.
Watching Caspian's open, unburdened guffaws as he struggled with his laughter, Susan again felt a stab of fear and panic. She needed to know what was happening to him. She needed to know the truth… no matter what.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
The door opened and Inara slipped into the room.
"Hi," she said lightly.
Peter was lying in his bed, turned resolutely away from the door.
"Go away," he barked.
Inara ignored him and crossed the room, rounding the bed until she stood over him. Her face was strange, all her usual laugher and bluster gone revealing a nakedness that made her seem very young.
"What do you want?" Peter spat glaring venomously up at her, "Don't you have some world-saving mission to carry out?"
"Why are you acting like such an ass?" Inara demanded instead.
"Oh, I don't know," Peter growled up sarcastically, "I think I have two damn good reasons right here!"
He shoved his infected and deadened hands and arms at her. Inara rolled her eyes.
"Oh please, the whole sob, boo-hoo, poor me act is really wearing thin," Inara shot back, "Now Queenie and co might be slightly more sensitive to your whinging but I'm telling you to get your lazy behind out of bed and start getting over yourself!"
Peter stared at her for a few seconds genuinely taken aback. Then he flushed, anger seeping into his eyes.
"What the hell would you know about this?!" Peter growled, "Do you know what it feels like for me?"
All the hatred and fear burst out of him in a molten wave as words spilled from his lips, words that were designed to tear and hurt. He was shaken, shaken by his lack of control but he couldn't help it. Never in his life had he felt so helpless, nothing compared to this not even that sickening moment he had realised his brother had been taken by the White Witch or the powerless rage he had felt as he watched his people slaughtered as he rode for his life. He felt like a child and a beast, powerless and defenceless but filled with a rage that made him want to rend and break, to scream his pain to the world.
"I was a king! I was a knight! And now I'm nothing! Powerless! Useless!' Peter spat, "Do you know how it feels to have fallen so far? I can't help my sister! I can't help my family or my kingdom or my friends! Do you know how that feels?! Do you? How dare you judge me!"
He glared at her, sitting up in bed as his face contorted in a demonic mien of utter helpless hatred.
"You have no idea," his voice dropped to a deadly whisper, "You have no idea who helpless I feel. How broken I feel. I was a king… and now I'm just broken."
"SMACK!"
Peter's head snapped to the side, his eyes widening in shock as Inara slowly lowered her trembling hand.
"No idea?" she hissed, "No idea?!"
Peter turned and looked at her as Inara pulled her sword from her sheath. He watched, eyes bulging as Inara stepped deliberately towards him. With a cry, she sliced the air with her sword moving into a battle-dance, a series of movements designed to train her balance and flow of movements.
Peter watched her with an expert eye as she slashed and parried. Inara stumbled and the sword fell from her exhausted arms and she looked up at Peter. He stared at her, horrified.
"Now do you understand?" she demanded fiercely, hissing between her teeth, "Now do you see?"
Peter tried to speak but no words would spring forth. He licked his dry lips and tried again.
"How?" he asked faintly.
"How else?" Inara said bitterly as she sheathed her sword.
"Why –"
"Because they don't need to know," Inara said quietly, "I can still handle myself."
Peter looked at her, compassion in his eyes.
"Inara… I'm sorry," he whispered.
"Do you know why she went after you? Why the Great Darkness did this to you?" Inara said instead ignoring his words.
Peter looked at her silently as Inara continued.
"Because it was afraid of you. It knew how great a threat you really were and it deliberately disabled you. It hit you right where it would hurt," Inara looked at him squarely, "Think about that. The Darkness feared you."
Peter was speechless as Inara pressed on.
"Queenie was right. You're not just a fighter," Inara continued, "You have other skills. You are a veteran, you have experience and you have the knowledge and the tactics. Don't hide away. Don't falter because we need you, we need what you know."
She looked at him, tears in her eyes.
"And you're not alone."
"Ina–"
Before Peter could even get the words out of his dry mouth Inara was gone, the door closing behind her as Peter stared at the polished wood in utter disbelief.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Caspian turned and instantly looked away.
"You don't get to turn away from me. Look at me," Susan said calmly, a sea of emotions boiling under her bravado, "You owe me that at least."
Caspian sighed, his shoulders falling. Susan felt sick. She wanted to turn and run because she knew that at this moment something would change forever that something indescribably precious to her would be shattered and she would be left to hold the pieces.
"What is it, your majesty?" he said politely, his face disinterested as though he was talking to a stranger.
Needles stabbed her heart.
"Do you love me?" Susan asked in a broken, trembling voice.
She sucked in a breath, hating herself. She had rehearsed this so many times, the cool dry voice she'd used, the cold impersonal questions. She would try to distance herself, make herself stone and now… this… she was baring herself to him, opening herself up for more pain.
Oh how she hated herself at that very moment.
Caspian looked at her, eyes bleak.
"No."
That single word tore her apart.
"How?"
"You don't want to know," Caspian said.
"Was it…" she hated this, hated sounding so weak, "Was it something I did? Is it me?"
She remembered their one night together, the passion and the heat but most of all the love, the enduring unbroken love that had bound them together in body and heart and mind. She could hear his whispers and cries, the vows and promises he had made to her.
"You… you said you would love me forever," Susan repeated in a whisper.
"And I meant it…" Caspian trailed off, "Once."
"What happened? What?!" Susan became frantic.
She wanted to grab him, she wanted to shake him, she wanted to stab him and shot him full of arrows but most of all she wanted him just to hold her and tell her everything would be alright.
"How? You just can't wake up and decide you'd stop loving someone! WHAT HAPPENED?!"
She was trembling, pale, weeping and she knew her voice had woken the others but she didn't care, she needed to know. Needed to know what had gone so terribly wrong.
Caspian touched her tear-streaked face and the softness and warmth in his hands just made her weep harder.
"It was Siobhan."
"What?!"
"She did something to me. That spell that hit me," Caspian said speaking brokenly, in bits and pieces, his chest heaving as he fought to control himself, "It did something to me. It crawled inside of me."
He looked at her and she physically recoiled from the loathing and disgust that quavered in his dark eyes.
"It crawled inside of me and it violated me and it took something away," Caspian swallowed, "Everything I felt for you. All the love and adoration. It's all gone. There's nothing left."
"No," Susan begged to him, to Aslan, to the world, "No… please… you're lying. No."
"I don't know what love is anymore. The love I felt for you… it was glorious and unbreakable and it would've hold for all eternity. But now there's nothing, there's only a hole. A darkness," Caspian looked at her pain as if seeing it from long, long distance, as though it was something he could not truly understand, "And it's more than that. Every time I look at you…"
He touched the skin beneath her eyes and Susan let out a voiceless cry as that feeling of wrongness returned, sweeping through her and drowning her in utter darkness. He tore his hands away and Susan gasped for breath as though she'd been plunged underwater.
"Every time?" she whispered.
Caspian nodded.
"Sometimes I hate you and I don't even know why," Caspian continued in a flat toneless voice, "But mostly I just feel numb. I feel nothing."
Susan looked away, crying, wanting to stop and hold it all in but she couldn't.
"I've pained you," Caspian noted almost with clinical coldness, "I'm sorry your majesty but…"
"It's not your fault," Susan whispered, "It's not… I forgive you."
He bowed, a formal gesture that held nothing, meant nothing but a courtesy.
"Thank you."
They stared at each other, once lovers now nothing more than strangers. A car horn shattered their silence.
"I must go," Caspian said formally, "I…"
"Go," Susan whispered, "Just… go."
He nodded at her as though nothing more than a business transaction had passed between them and he left, left her alone in the hallway, wet and utterly alone.
"Susan…"
Polly stepped out of her room, aching for her. Susan turned to her, face crumpled and as Polly watched, a bleak serenity fell over the queen's face.
"I'm sorry Mrs. Plummer," Susan whispered, "But I must take leave."
Polly wanted to grab her, hold her and tell her that it was reasonable to break down and cry but she gave the queen her dignity.
"Be careful," Polly said instead.
Susan turned and ran out of the house, slamming the door behind her as she fled into the rain and the night, running from the house and from all the hurt that besieged her.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Caspian stepped into Professor Kirk's old and noisy car ignoring the light rain that fell over him in shimmering sheets. A frigid silence surrounded him as the king sat stiff in his seat staring resolutely ahead.
"Well, this is all buggered up to hell," Inara muttered.
Caspian refused to look at any of them.
"I guess you heard?" he asked quietly.
"Hard not to," Professor Kirk said almost apologetically looking at the young Telmarine with the most tragic of sympathies, "I'm…"
"So am I," Caspian said in the same soft, toneless voice.
He turned to Jason who was staring at the man belligerently, his hands tightened into white-knuckled fists.
"Do I need to sleep with one eye open?" Caspian asked wearily.
Jason grinded his teeth together, logic warring with passion. Finally he let out a long breath and his fists opened.
"It's not your fault," the Seeker growled out uncomfortably.
Jason practically squirmed in his chair as Caspian turned to Inara. The young king knew the Seeker would not kill him for hurting his queen but nor would he forgive him either. There was a rift between them now. Inara was looking at him with not sympathy in her eyes but sad empathy. She nodded slightly and it was enough.
"Thank you," Caspian said quietly.
"Save it," Jason growled, "We've got a boy to rescue."
Caspian smiled slightly as Jason glanced at Kirk. The venerated professor instantly got the message and started up his car. Inara stared out the window, a strange look in her eyes as she fidgeted anxiously, a sweat rolling down her face. The ride was completely silent as they meandered through the dark streets of London heading towards their destination.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Susan wandered the streets in a daze, uncaring of the rain that soaking her, uncaring of the shouts and cries as she pushed past bystanders and crossed roads without a care.
"He… he no longer…" the words choked in her throat.
She pressed on, chilled by the wind but still she walked on barely aware of where she was going. She just needed to get away from it all, get away from him.
A part of her, the detached side that viewed off all this with a clinical eye noted the delicious irony of it all. She had only just broken down the barriers and fears that had held them apart. She had given herself to him, wholly, completely and now this…
The other part of her wanted to howl and curl up into a corner and never wake again.
A shadow fell over her and rough hands grabbed arms. Susan instantly reacted, instincts and training coursing through her as she stomped on the foot of her attacker. The man yelped in pain as Susan twisted away and ripping her arms free from his grip.
Her hands instantly went for the dagger at her side and she cursed violently as she realised it wasn't there.
'Idiot!' she berated herself, wincing as she imagined what Jason would have to say at her walking around weapon-less.
Recovering quickly she dropped into a fighter's crouch, teeth bared daring a counter-attack.
"Susan… Butterfly?"
Susan's eyes bulged and her jaws dropped. She looked up and instantly ice froze her muscles.
"Da… dad?" she whispered.
Daniel Pevensie stared down at his oldest daughter, an astonished look on his face. For her part, Susan stared back at him, horrified at the haggard look on his face. Out of all the Pevensie siblings, Peter resembled their father the most. The same golden hair, the same crystal blue eyes, the same stubborn set of the chin and the same firmness of shoulder and character, it was all there mirrored in father and son.
But he had changed, he had (Susan's throat tightened painfully) aged. Lines streaked across his face, carving pits and gulches that stood out starkly in the wan light. Grey tainted his golden hair and he seemed just… less. Less tall, less strong, less like the overprotective father Susan had known all her life, the father who had spent hours reading to her, who had held her as she cried after nightmares and who had warned her time after time about the dangers of the opposite sex. In that single moment Susan felt very, very old.
"Butterfly?" Daniel asked, repeating the childhood nickname.
Tears came to his eyes, streaking down his face.
"What happened?" he asked throatily, "What happened to you? Are you okay? Where are your brothers and sister? What…"
It was too much. After all she had endured this night it was just too much. She did the only thing she could think of. She became a coward.
She whirled and ran, ran as fast as her legs could carry her as her heart burst inside her chest.
"SUSAN!" her father screamed after her, "WAIT! NO! SUSAN!"
He charged after her but the wounds he suffered in the Great War held him back, hampering his legs. He stumbled and fell, still screaming for her.
"SUSAN! BUTTERFLY!"
With his voice and words echoing in her ears, Susan ran pushing past crowds as she cried, great hiccoughing gulps that threatened to suffocate her. A wall of people barred her but she fought them, kicking and lashing out blindly before she was through. Blinded by tears, she stumbled over her own feet and pitched forwards. Sodden earth slammed into her face as she fell.
For a few seconds she laid there weakly, dirt and tears and rain on her face, her body heaving as sobs fought their way out of her. She quietened and stilled, bystanders walking past her without a glance. Slowly Susan pulled herself up and looked ahead, blinking at the sight that greeted her.
Cheery light winked at her, enticing her to enter the huge glade as laughter and the smell of sugar hung cloyingly in the air. Despite the rain Susan could see families, usually led by impatient children, weave amongst the stalls and tents. The powerfully loud trumpeting of an elephant boomed out of the largest tent at the centre of the sprawl as Susan climbed wearily to her feet.
Her front was soaked, streaked with dark mud, her hair a mess. She glanced at the street behind her, wondering if she should head back to Professor Kirk's house but the laughter and the lights lured her back. It called to her like a siren's song, the cheer and the sheer delight that showed on the people's face a panacea to all that she had endured.
Hesitantly she limped across the grass and towards the fairgrounds leaving the night behind.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
"And people come here to get better?" Inara demanded staring up at the forbidding building that sat squatly in front of them like a toad.
"It's more of a way-house to move them out of the way of the more gentile sectors of society," Professor Kirk said with rare venom, "It also does a stupendous job of crushing spirits so there is no trouble."
Inara shuddered.
"I'll bet," she muttered.
She turned to Jason and Caspian. Everything that had happened so far tonight. Everything that had been exposed, every ugly truth. It all faded away. This was no time for emotions and grudges and blame, they had to work together.
Jason and Caspian stepped out of the car, Jason slightly unsteady on his legs. They both turned to Inara who stared up at them, a defeated look on her face. The Seeker held out the crude handcuffs and grinned a wolfish smile at her.
Inara looked back at him and Jason blinked as he thought he saw a look of fear flash across her face. He started and the moment was gone as Inara sighed and held out her hands.
"Click. Click."
Thirty seconds later the two men were dragging a kicking and screaming girl up the front steps of the asylum house as Professor Kirk's car slid away into the night to wait for what would come.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
She meandered aimlessly just letting it all wash over her. Children rushed past her, laughing in open glee and it brought a smile to her face. Vendors called from their stalls tempting her with food and wares.
Susan walked, her mind numb, simply opening herself to the fair like flowers to the sun, simply taking it all in. But she couldn't help but feel angry. How dare they be happy? How dare people enjoy themselves while she was dying on the inside? Was the world so cruel as to mock her?
"My dear child."
Susan started. A tall woman bedecked with a bizarre assortment of shawls and scarfs was smiling serenely down at her. She was tall and so graceful that Susan felt like a clumsy child before hers. Skeins of dark hair, soft and silky hung from the woman's head, woven and braided into intricate patterns that seemed to squirm against the pins that bound them tight. Gold and gems winked at her from around fingers and neck, the brilliance of their glow matched by the mischievous twinkle in her eye. And strange eyes they were, shaped and aslant like that off a cat's.
"You look troubled," the woman said gently as though speaking to a frightened beast, "Would you like some help?"
Her skin was golden, her features Asiatic and there was something mesmerising about her, a power and a pull. The woman gestured and Susan followed her fingers to a damp-looking purple tent with a stylised sign at the front that proclaimed it was the lair of the Mysterious Lady Viola, Mistress of the Crystal Ball.
Susan smiled politely, wanting nothing more than to be alone.
"No thanks, mam," she said primly, her voice a veritable blizzard, "Now if you'll excuse – "
"I think you would want to talk to me," Viola's voice was deceptively soft but the tone made Susan shiver, "I think we should talk. The forces have ordained it."
"The forces?" Susan asked sceptically.
The woman nodded. Susan noticed for the first time that everything the woman wore was purple, the lightest lavenders darkening to the most royal of purples adorned the woman's frail form. It should've made her look comical but somehow it seemed to suit this mysterious figure making her seem regal and infinitely wise.
"The forces that control us and moves us like pawns on a chessboard," Viola clucked, "Come child. There is much to talk about and little time. This way! This way!"
Helplessly Susan allowed herself to be dragged towards the tent as the woman pulled at her with surprising strength that belied her slender form..
Susan was thrust through the tent flap and immediately assaulted by incense that burnt inside. A single table and two chairs stood inside, a round crystal small sitting in an iron-wrought holder at the centre of the table.
"I… I don't have any money!" Susan protested, "I can't…"
"Hush!" Viola shushed her as she pushed Susan into one of the chairs.
Susan watched, stunned and a little unnerved as the purple lady turned to the tent flap and closed it, weaving her hands around in the air in a complicated design before turning back to her.
"Tea?" Viola asked, head cocked to the side.
"No! I'm sorry mam but I've really got to be…" Susan tried again.
Viola ignored her and walked across the tent, taking her seat. She sat silently studying Susan with eyes that were coloured and glowed like polished amethysts.
"Hmm… interesting choice," the woman noted aloud.
She reached into her voluminous skirts and pulled out a deck of cards. She shuffled it briskly and held it up to Susan.
"Draw six cards," she demanded.
Susan opened her mouth to protested but the fiery look the woman sent her quickly made her reconsider. Sighing, Susan pulled out six cards and Viola took them off her.
"Letting the reading begin!" the woman announced dramatically as Susan rolled her eyes at the obvious melodramatics.
The amusement built as the woman made complex hand gestured over the first card before beginning to flip it over and show it to her. She had seen things like these before, Tarot cards, some of the girls at her old school had loved to dabble with them, giggling emptily as they grandly prophesised the coming of rich husbands and handsome princes.
Susan smiled wryly as she realised that for her had at least come true. The smile fled her face and she turned cold as she remembered what that situation was like now.
"Have no fear child," Viola remarked absently, "All things must end."
Susan blinked, staring at her in confusion and apprehension.
The first card was unlike any Tarot she had ever seen before. This was vivid and almost terrifying in its imagery. It showed a single bleeding heart wreathed in dark thorns and impaled on a single dark sword, ravens with eyes that seemed to glitter hovering ominously over the hideous tableau.
"Heartache," Viola looked at her shrewdly.
Her eyes glittered in the light and Susan suddenly felt very uncomfortable. Her gaze was intense and seemed to burn through air and flesh, revealing her heart for all the world to see.
"Oh yes, a crying young woman it doesn't take any gifts except for eyes and brains to see that it might be affairs of the heart," Susan shot back waspishly, taking refuge in anger.
Viola rolled her eyes and looked at her as though she was a simple child.
"More than simple heartache girl," Viola scolded, "More than that. A kindred spirit. A true soul-link. The serpents-that-intertwine. What you've lost isn't some paramour, it's true love."
Susan went white as a sheet, the hand she rested on the table trembling violently as Viola's words echoed in her ears.
"And it wasn't lost. It was taken," Viola was looking squarely at her, "By…"
The mysterious fortune-teller took the second card and flipped it over. Susan recoiled at the image that greeted her. A woman, a horrible abomination, a mix of both beast and human, glared up at her pure venom in her dark eyes. Behind her was utter darkness except for the thousands of tiny hungry eyes that seemed to pierce her soul.
"Enough said," Viola said gently, shuffling the card back into her deck.
Susan sat, statue still, her face completely devoid of colour.
"What are you?" she demanded of the woman.
Viola shrugged.
"A simple woman trying to make her way in this big strange world," she replied impishly already moving onto the third card.
Susan didn't know why but Aslan help her, she trusted this strange woman. She leaned forwards staring into the woman's purple eyes.
"Is… is there a way to… fix all this? Fix everything?" Susan begged, hating the weakness in her voice.
Viola looked at her shrewdly seemingly weighing up her next words carefully.
"Yes."
Hope blazed through Susan and a wide smile crossed her face as an exulted light entered her eyes.
"How?"
"Patience," Viola said mildly ignoring her question.
Susan was practically trembling, torn between frustration and anticipation as the third card was turned over. Susan sucked in an astonished breath at the woman in the picture. It had the same blue eyes and dark hair that greeted her every time she looked into a mirror or a crystal clear pool. Susan the Gentle, Queen of Narnia, stared back at her from the card, a golden lion by her side, guarding and watching over her. But behind the majestic two were three rings of light, intertwined and interlinked.
"The rings… what do they mean?"
Viola looked at her carefully.
"They're a gift and a curse," the woman said quietly.
"What?!"
When the woman spoke her voice was soft and toneless but yet it was filled with such power that it set Susan's teeth on edge.
"You have travelled far and there are still many leagues to go," Viola said, "And on your journeying you will meet three gods and be anointed by them. You my darling will be something that has no existed before, you will be thrice-blessed."
"Gods?" Susan looked faint, "Gods?!"
Relentlessly Viola took the last three cards and flipped them over briskly one by one.
"Three gifts you will receive," Viola's voice was so seductive, so utterly terrifying.
The first card was simple, stylised wisps of smoke wound themselves around pillars that framed a set of eyes so life-like that Susan wanted to flee from their intense gaze.
"The Sight."
The second card depicted an emerald clearing in a dark forest. Moonlight lay reflected in a pool of clear water as a stag, magnificent and filled with a wild nobility, drank delicately from it. Susan blinked as she realised its horns and its hooves glowered as though they were polished metals.
"The Hunt."
The third card made Susan recoil. The empty eyes of a bleached skull stared out at her, its mouth opened in a silent, endless scream. A dark bird, a devourer of carrion, perched on its ribs picking at the rotting flesh that still lingered there. Susan felt a malevolence peering out from the card, reaching out with invisible fingers to hold her and bind her.
"And Death."
Viola's eyes bore into Susan as the queen stared at her, breathless, captivated by the power that shone in the woman's gaze.
"And know this. When all three gifts are bestowed and you become thrice-blessed, a making that will shake the very foundations of reality itself, the curse that holds your lover will break."
"And…" Susan didn't want to finish the unspoken statement.
"And you will have him back once more."
. . . . . . . . . . . .
"She will be kept in here," the carer, a bored-looking you man said as he unlocked a door, "Until the doctors can assess her."
Caspian and Jason trailed after him, a writhing Inara held between the two men. She glared around at them all, Polly's make-up helping her look pale and frenetic.
"They're watching me!" Inara shrieked passionately at the man, "Their eyes. Always on me… they tell me things. They – OW!"
The carer reached out and with almost casual cruelly grabbed Inara by the hair and yanked her into the room, shoving her none too gently towards the hard pallet that served as a bed.
Inara hit the bed hard, wincing in pain as the carer studied her.
"She's nice looking," the carer noted, a hungry smile on his face, "Might brighten up the place a bit. The others aren't exactly works of arts."
He guffawed loudly as though it was the funniest joke ever told. Caspian and Jason's eyes flashed angrily, both of them longing to lunge at the man as Inara glared at him, hands twitching in their cuffs. The carer stopped and cocked his head at Jason and Caspian.
"By the way which nuthouse do you two work at?" he asked.
Caspian and Jason glanced at each other and turned back to the man, twin wicked smiles on their face.
The man blinked.
"BAM!"
He instantly crumpled as both men ploughed their fists into his face.
"Yeah, take that!" Inara muttered rubbing at her sore scalp.
Jason pulled out the keys to the handcuffs and freed her. Caspian relieved the carer of the loops of keys at his belt and the trio scurried out of the small cell. Caspian carefully locked the heavy metal door behind them, sealing the man in and turned to the others.
"What now?" Inara demanded.
"We find this Eustace fellow," Caspian said quickly, "Quietly."
They turned and stared at the labyrinth of twisting corridors and cell-lined walls that sprawled all around them.
"We'll split up," Jason said firmly, "Inara, you go with Pretty Boy. If anyone stumbles upon you pretend you're taking her to another cell. I'll go this way."
"Pretty Boy?" the king scowled, insulted.
"It's a nickname. It means we like you," Inara smirked.
Caspian raised an eyebrow but was mollified.
"If you found him get back to Kirk straight away," Jason ordered, "I'll make my own way out. Got it?"
Inara and Caspian nodded and hurried off to the left as Jason took the right, treading lightly down the corridor, his senses on high alert. Steadily he darted from hiding place to hiding place, moving in the dim lit with cat-like grace. Every time he passed a cell he peered into the pane of dirty glass set inside the heavy metal doors trying to make out the occupants within.
Some of them were sleeping, held helpless in drug-induced sleeps. Others paced their cells, eyes wide and haunted by the afflictions that tormented them. Jason kept a tight leash on his powers. With so many deranged thoughts and twisted minds around if he opened himself up they would flow into him with all the force of a tidal wave, sweeping his own mind aside before pitching him into dark pit of insanity. Even now with his barriers up the Seeker could feel some of the more darker and insane thoughts raving at him like beasts in a cage demanding entrance with a ferocity that deeply unnerved him.
Still he pressed on, eyes roving the bleached white surroundings. He was peering into another of the cells trying to make out the figure within when he suddenly froze.
"I know you're there," Jason called out fearlessly, straightening, "No point in hiding."
He turned and stared straight in the face of the carer they had knocked out before. The man's nose was broken, rivulets of blood streaming down his face. The carer glared at him, fury in his eyes.
"You shouldn't have done that," he growled pointing at his ruined nose.
Jason shrugged.
"Meh, there's a lot of things I shouldn't have done," the Seeker replied easily.
"You have no idea what you're messing with," the carer snarled.
The Seeker's hands dropped to the back of his belt.
"Really?" Jason raised his eyebrows, "Care to share?"
The carer blinked and the Seeker recoiled as twin pools of utter darkness stared back at him. The black-eyed carer smiled, a cool reptilian grin on his pale face as the white disappeared from his eyes inky darkness taking their place.
"You have no idea," the possessed man hissed.
"Son of a!" Jason swore violently.
His hand whipped up hurling the dagger he had retrieved. The blade spun through the air and the carer made no move to dodge it. It slammed into his shoulder knocking him back but the carer quickly straightened. Grinning, malicious joy in his completely black eyes the carer pulled the dagger free from his own flesh and hurled it aside.
"Anything else you want to throw at me?" the carer snarled.
The Seeker sighed and held out his hands.
"Oh nothing… just this."
"BAM!"
The carer slammed into the wall, crushed against the brick with deadly force as Jason staggered with groan. The miasma of madness hanging in the air instantly surged towards him like serpents to a mouse. Horrific images and disconnected chaotic thoughts slammed into his head almost frying his mind as Jason fought to throw his barriers back up.
The carer roared and fought, bucking against the invisible hands that held him prisoner as Jason slowly began to regain control. With a cry, the carer sprung free from Jason's power and flew at the Seeker. Jason slammed into the wall as the carer tackled him, brutally punishing him with a punch on the face.
Jason slid to the ground dazed as the carer lurched back, black eyes flashing.
"INTRUDERS!" he screamed, "INTRUDERS!"
He turned back to Jason and chuckled.
"As for you…" he began menacingly lacing his fingers into a single fist and raising it high above his head.
Jason glared up at him, still seeing double.
"Go to hell," the Seeker spat.
The fallen dagger flew into his hands, snatched by his power, and Jason instantly surged forwards, stabbing up. The carer screamed as blood splattered the walls. Jason ruthlessly ripped his dagger to the side, slicing skin, flesh and viscera apart.
The carer fell, screaming as he clutched at his stomach, organs threatening to spill out from the gaping wound in his gut. Almost as an act of mercy, Jason slit his throat ending it quickly.
The Seeker lurched to his foot, kicking the body aside as cries of alarm echoed throughout the asylum. Jason swore violently and rushed off ready to face the new crisis.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Inara's stared at the back of Caspian's head at they ran down the hallway, looking into each cell that passed.
She was conflicted. Torn between loyalty and sensibility. This man had hurt her friend, put his hands into her chest and tore out her heart and every instinct in her told her to hate him, to hurt him as bad as he had hurt Susan. But it wasn't his fault.
Inara stared at Caspian, remembering his tortured words to Susan and pity flooded through her. To live like that, to remember a love that once was and feel absolutely nothing? To live a life half-lived because something infinitely precious had been torn away? She couldn't even begin to imagine the hell that must be.
She had been the one to bring Susan and Caspian back together (and even though that scheme had gone to hell… hey, at least it had worked!) and guilt tore through her as she realised how much it must kill Susan, to have had him back, to have had loved him again and then have it all cruelly taken away once more.
She wanted to like Caspian, she really did but the pain in her friend's voice… that she could not forget. She trusted this man, would place her life in his hands but she couldn't bring herself to like him.
Both of them froze as the sound of conversation drifted around the corner. They instantly ducked into the shadows, watching with bated breath.
"Is it about to begin Keller?" one of the guards asked as they passed the hallway.
The man who answered was a head taller than the rest and had an arrogant bearing that immediately marked him out as leader. His head was shaved, his eyes burning with fanatical light.
"Almost," Keller growled back, "The timing has to be perfect. If we don't then the rit–"
"INTRUDERS!" a scream echoed down the hall, "INTRUDERS!"
Inara and Caspian stared at each other, white-faced.
"Jason!" Inara growled, "Moron!"
They tossed nervous looks over their shoulders but waited to see what the guards would do.
"Intruders!" one of the guards turned to Keller, obviously terrified, "If someone found out – "
Keller backhanded him, blood and teeth sprayed across the walls as the guard staggered. Keller icily glared at him, completely unfazed.
"Go the chamber," he ordered coolly, "I'll handle the rest."
The two guards instantly sprinted off down the hall as Keller turned and rubbed his hands together. Caspian and Inara quickly swallowed gasps as his eyes instantly went completely black. Ice swept down Caspian's spine as he slowly began to realise they were in for a whole world of trouble.
"Intruders huh?" Keller smiled cruelly and held out his hands.
He began chanting in a guttural voice, the foreign words harsh and cruel. They seemed to stab the ears and rend at the heart as a wild wind swept down the corridor.
The lights flickered and died plunging the room into utter darkness before they were suddenly ablaze again revealing two cloaked figures that now hovered before Keller.
Inara's eyes as she gasped but Caspian's instincts kicked in, overriding his own panic. All fear and alarm were neatly shunted aside as the keen-minded tactician and iron-willed warrior within took control. He grabbed onto Inara's arm. The girl whirled to look at him, eyes wild.
"Move!" Caspian hissed lowly, "We've got to go!"
Dragging Inara behind him, the two dashed down the hall as Keller, the dark-eyed guard grinned viciously.
"Ill-Winds," he commanded the ruby-eyed demons, "Find them and tear them apart."
The demonic elementals nodded and swept down the hall as Keller chuckled before casually continuing down the hall. All around him the inmates of the asylum seemed to sense something was wrong. They howled and pounded at the doors creating a primitive cacophony that drowned out the howl of the Ill-Winds.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
"GO!" Caspian roared as a vortex roared into life behind them, "RUN!"
An Ill-Wind sprung forth from the storm and lunged at them, talons outstretched. Caspian shoved Inara forwards and twisted himself, dodging the deadly claws.
"GO! I'll handle this thing!" he roared at Inara.
"But…" the girl began.
"GO! FIND EUSTACE!"
Inara nodded and darted off as Caspian turned to the Ill-Wind who watched him belligerently. Weapon-less, Caspian stilled grinned.
"Alright, before we fight I think its only fair to warn you I am one of the strongest warriors to have ever – "
Before he could even finish his sentence a powerful blast of wind slammed him into the wall engulfing him inside a broiling tempest.
AAAAAA
Inara ran, peering desperately into each cell she passed.
"Come on," she hissed, "Come on! Come on!"
She turned the corner.
"THERE!" a guard roared, "THERE!"
"DAMN IT!" Inara hissed as she whirled around and ran back the way she'd come.
She turned the corner and…
"CRACK!"
Keller lowered his fists and Inara hit the ground, a bruise blossoming on her cheek. She was out cold.
"Sir?" the guard turned the corner and instantly bowed submissively to the dark-eyed man.
"She'll do nicely," Keller looked at the guard, "Take her to the chamber. We'll use her as part of the sacrifice."
The guard nodded and dragged Inara's prone body away as Keller smiled, triumph in his cold dark eyes.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Author's notes: First of all... I love you guys! Your reviews were very much welcomed! I love them all even if you have negative things to say as it points out weaknesses in my writing so I can work to improve them!
Anywho... for the people who were confused about Caspian's behaviour from last chapter, he's not acting strange because he was scared of Susan's powers... his feelings were ripped from him. And the name of this chapter explains it all, the Great Darkness is hitting them where it hurts – denying Peter his ability to fight, stripping Caspian and Susan of their love. As for why and what exactly the Darkness is up to... there's a world coming up where we explore the history of the Darkness and hopefully it'll fill in some gaps.
And I had a comment about how some characters are placed into the background and yes I've noted that and yes I'm so sorry for that but trying to juggle so many characters, so many storylines inevitably some would receive more attention in some worlds over others but I'm trying to keep them as balanced as possible. Hopefully it doesn't get too skewed.
So what new twists have we learned from this chapter? First of all Susan and the mysterious fortune teller and the so-called blessings she's to receive. What does it all mean? Siobhan's spell on Caspian and Peter – how is it going to affect all of them? And finally of course Jason and his enigmatic past and the spell that took him in Persephone – why?
Finally and here's the important bit – just to clear things up the whole summing up, flash-back look thing at this fic so far is going to be like a DVD special entitled 'ACROSS THE WORLDS – BETWEEN THE WORLDS' – it will be like any DVD extra with the director/writer (me!), the actors (Anna Popplewell, Gerard Butler – Jason, Ron Glass – Elias, Emily Browning – Inara, William Moseley, Ben Barnes and some other guest actors) looking at what's happened and commenting on it and their own (imagined) thoughts on playing these characters - what makes them tick, what makes them work as characters. There will be behind-the-scenes look at some worlds, writer/actor thoughts, some deleted scenes etc.
So what can you do to help? (Cause I need some help on this!)
First of all, I NEED A VOICE ACTOR FOR ZARU (I can't for the life of me think of a decent voice actor – I envision Zaru as sounding like a young teenager who's a bit comedic, a bit dorky, a softie at heart but a bit snarky all at the same time – any suggestions would help! But please, please stay away from any Harry Potter actors or god forbid anything like HSM or Twilight – you say Zac Efron or Robert Pattison and innocent puppies would get hurt! A friendly warning - :) )
Second, I NEED YOU – MY BELOVED FANS TO ASK QUESTIONS! Obviously how is this story going to end, spoiler-related questions will be largely ignored but I could provide cryptic clues for future happenings. But any questions – such as clarification, behind-the-scene questions or anything like that I'll be more than happy to answer!
Wow, this makes this project seem so immense and important but I'm really glad you love my fic – that makes me love you!
Cheers!