Chapter 32: Blissful Death

Also known as: A Mother's Love

Takumi woke with a start, his nightmare shattering as he jolted back to reality, his lungs heaving for air. A hand went to his chest as the memory of that pain lingered, slowly fading as he began to wake. His heart thundered in his ears, in his chest, painfully fast. He sunk against the tree behind him, staring up at the fractured sky. The cold embrace of the chilly night air burned in his lungs as he stole deep breaths to calm himself.

It was a dream. A nightmare. Nothing more.

And yet, Takumi couldn't help but feel as if there was more to it than just that. There was such pain in Corrin's eyes, even as it was her sword that had pierced his chest.

It must have been brought on by that conversation he had with Corrin a few nights back. She'd shared her nightmare with his and it had bled into his own.

Takumi dragged his hand down his face with a heavy sigh. He couldn't escape his nightmares. Not even here, in the depths of the Bottomless Canyon. And now Corrin had become a fixture of them. Again and Again he'd see her die, see her turn into a dragon and be powerless against her. He'd see her fight Xander only to have the Nohrian prince cut her down or that bastard Iago turn him against her like he'd done before.

Those dreams were the hardest to wake from. His heart would race for minutes, cold sweat clinging to his skin as he told himself over and over again that it was just a dream. Just a nightmare. But they were so close to reality it was chilling. The feel of her blood, or his own depending on the dream, warm and slick on his fingers, dripping and soaking through his clothes, his chest, felt so real.

He'd woken up time and time again mistaking his sweat for blood and would tear himself from his bed in a tangle of sheets and flailing limbs in panic. There was no relief of it being a dream as his nightmares became realer still.

Takumi slowly caught his breath as the seconds ticked by. The cold air wrapped itself around him, stealing what precious heat the thin blanket over his legs brought. He hitched it up higher, tucked his legs closer to his body, and sighed again.

"At least nightmares are indiscriminate," a calm voice came from the darkness beside Takumi, and he jolted alert in a half-panic before he recognised the voice and, later still, his eyes adjusted to see Prince Leo resting against a tree. His long legs were sprawled out across the dirt, Princess Elise asleep with her head in his lap. Leo idly stroked her hair as the Princess' brow furrowed and she murmured something in her sleep.

Takumi watched for a moment, Leo smiling down at Elise, his eyes blanketed with hurt, his smile tinged with heartache. The Hoshidan Prince tore his eyes away. Even though it was Leo who spoke to him, he felt as if he'd intruded on an intimate moment between siblings.

Takumi wasn't sure what to do, or say, and opted for, "she gets nightmares often?"

"Most nights. They're rarely bad enough for her to wake, though."

Lucky, Takumi thought bitterly before he caught himself and quickly retracted that thought. He hated – absolutely hated – how coarse and bitter his thoughts turned towards these Nohrians. Towards any Nohrian. It was a hard habit to break; one he'd only noticed recently. If any of his siblings, or Corrin for that matter, knew how ugly his thoughts were, they would be horrified. Mortified.

Especially Corrin. He felt ashamed just acknowledging it. He felt on edge, tensed up completely, if one of his Nohrian allies even looked at him.

And now he didn't know what to say. The silence between Takumi and Leo hung in the air as biting as the cool air against their skin. Words climbed up Takumi's throat, churning in his mouth, over his tongue, but nothing seemed right. It became glaringly obvious that he knew nothing of the man sitting not a few metres beside him.

And that was of Takumi's doing. It was his own fault that he was now isolated, surrounded by many allies but not a single friend.

Princess Elise stirred, breaking the silence with a soft whimper. Takumi's heart sank and despite the nauseous anxiety swirling in his gut, he forced himself to take a long, sharp breath and face Leo.

"You're… not sleeping?" Takumi managed to force out. He hated the way his voice sounded, how he stumbled over his words in front of the Nohrian Prince. He swallowed, throat and mouth dry. Leo took a moment to study Elise and the seconds that past had Takumi burning with regret. With embarrassment.

For all he knew, it might've been him who woke Leo up from his sleep. Had he shouted in the midst of his nightmare? Cried out, even? At least he was still in the same spot he'd fallen asleep in. He had been known to sleepwalk.

"Bit hard to sleep with her wriggling all the time," Leo said finally, quirking a smile at his sister. Takumi let out a breath, slumping slightly against the tree. He forced down the tension building in his chest. Forced himself to relax just enough to breathe, just enough to calm the erratic pace of his heart.

"Don't expect me to comfort you if you cry," Leo quipped.

Takumi stiffened and hurriedly rubbed at his eyes. His heart leapt into his throat even as he found his eyes dry.

"Elise sometimes cries from her nightmares," Leo continued, and the smug grin on the Prince's face had Takumi aflame as if he'd been the one caught crying.

"I'm– I'm not going to cry," Takumi scoffed, folding his arms tightly across his chest. The burning mortification on his face spread to his ears and he was all too glad that it was dark.

"I wouldn't blame you if you did."

Leo's words fell over Takumi like a cold blanket of air, stealing away his mortification, his embarrassment, the heat on his cheeks. It fell heavy on his shoulders, on his heart. It was the acknowledgement of hardship, of grief, from Leo that had Takumi temporarily speechless.

Again, Takumi didn't know what to say. It felt so strange, numb even, to hear those words from Leo. From a Prince of Nohr. From someone that, not too long ago, they had been fighting against.

"It's not so simple to put the past aside," Leo said. "To forget everything you've been brought up thinking and fight as allies."

Takumi sighed, agreeing without a thought. "Yeah…" He clenched his jaw, sat up straighter. He wasn't going to let the opportunity to find some common ground between him and Leo slip from his grasp. Which meant he had to actually contribute to their conversation. He cleared his throat a little too loudly and said, "Sakura and Princess Elise make it look easy."

Leo breathed a laugh. "You wouldn't believe we'd been at war if you looked at those two. To think I'm actually envious of them…"

Takumi found himself smiling in a strange agreement with Leo. He hadn't thought that it wasn't just him who struggled with this. With fighting alongside a nation they'd been at war with.

"They've been teaching Corrin how to heal," Takumi said. With every passing second, every word they spoke, he found himself relaxing further. He no longer folded his arms. He settled against the tree as the tension in his body fled. "She's actually decent at it."

"Perhaps if we'd put them in charge the war would've ended months ago."

Takumi snorted. "Probably."

The two shared a brief moment of amicable silence before Takumi yawned. He stretched out his legs, rolled his shoulders. As the adrenalin from his nightmare wore off, the need for sleep crept back in.

"If everyone took them as an example… the future might not look so bad," Takumi said, shrugging.

"It's worth a shot," Leo said in agreement.

"Maybe… maybe getting to know you isn't so bad after all." The words struggled up his throat.

"I could say the same about you."

"I guess I… might've had the wrong impression about you," Takumi admitted. "You always seemed to act like you were better than everyone else because you're some kind of magic-prodigy or something…" he trailed off as he realised how petty he sounded. "You're the Prince of a foreign country; I didn't think we'd have anything in common."

"And here I thought you were just stubborn and annoying," Leo said in jest, which had Takumi scowling until he caught the twinkle of mirth in Leo's eyes. "Corrin seems to think we might share some common ground, though I must admit I had the same thought as you. Our cultures are quite different, I doubt there would be much overlap with our interests."

Takumi sighed. "The fact that we had the same idea makes me think Corrin might've been on to something."

Leo laughed in turn. "Maybe it's true. Either way, it'll take time. Time I'm more willing to invest now that you've come out of your shell."

"What shell?" Takumi scoffed. He folded his arms, rolled his eyes at Leo. "I'm always like this!"

"I know," Leo chuckled. "But Corrin did warn me it might take a few attempts to get anywhere."

Takumi sank a little against the tree. "She… spoke to you about me?" He wasn't sure whether to feel mortified or annoyed that Corrin had thought it important enough to speak to Leo about. He thought back to all the times he'd seen the two talking, smiling, laughing together… had she really spoken to Leo about him?

"Once or twice. I think our bickering got to her."

Takumi's stomach dropped. He hadn't realised their arguments affected her. But of course it would. Of course Corrin would be upset to see her two families fighting. She'd gone out of her way to speak to them both about it, to try and coax them into an uneasy friendship…

"She's so nosy," Takumi grumbled, though he had to admit, he didn't entirely dislike that part of her. In fact, he doubted there were many things that he didn't like about Corrin.

"And persistent," Leo added. He'd heard Takumi through the silence. "If it wasn't for her I would still be in Nohr. I can say the same for Xander. She trusted us even when we were at war. I doubt there are many like her in this world."

"I know what you mean," Takumi said, sighing with a long puff of air. She hadn't blamed him when he'd turned on his allies in the grips of a possession. She'd forgiven him for his biting words, his scathing looks, his dissent. She'd forgiven him for everything and took him on as an ally and friend. Even when he distrusted her, she stood by him.

If anything, he didn't deserve her trust. He didn't deserve her.

"It's almost strange, talking about Corrin like this," Leo said. "Not long ago we'd both thought she was our sister."

Takumi almost groaned in exasperation. He didn't want to remember that. He didn't want to remember what it was like thinking she was his sister. The turmoil, the disgust at his feelings, the regret and almost deciding to just not care about it all…

Not a day goes by where he doesn't thank the Gods for his Mother's letter.

Takumi managed to rein in his show of emotions and forced a tight smile and gave a dry laugh. "I guess that's one thing we have in common."

Takumi had said that lightly but Leo's comment brought back the memory of Corrin snapping at Ryoma and Xander. She'd felt betrayed by them. Finding out they weren't related had been a blessing for Takumi but it had put a fracture in Corrin's trust. She still wore a smile, still kept her head held high, but that outburst and the many that preceded it revealed that she wasn't as strong as she looked.

The war weighed heavily on Corrin more than most. She was their leader. She wielded the Divine Yato. Takumi had seen the effect the war had on her, and not just in her scars. The many scars that spread across her skin, from the one he'd given her to the horrendous scar that bloomed across her chest. No, Corrin had broken down in front of Takumi enough that he knew she carried the consequences of the war close to her heart.

She took responsibility for what happened, as any great leader should. He just didn't know how long she'd be able to cope like that.

The night dragged on. Each passing hour felt longer than all those that came before. Corrin stalked the length of their camp time and time again, her eyes searching the broken horizon for any sign of hope. Any sign of Kaze, of the allies she'd condemned when she sent them up on that ridge. She balled her hands into fists, drove her feet into the ground as she whirled and made her way back to the infirmary for the umpteenth time. She made the mistake of catching Oboro's eyes. The worry struck like a thin sliver of ice right into Corrin's heart. Takumi's retainers spoke in hushed whispers but there was no doubt what their conversation entailed.

The weight of the decision Corrin had made, the weight of the consequences they'd faced, pressed down on her heart. It was suffocating. Her lungs constantly fought for air. She sucked in a tight breath, forcing herself to breathe. In, out. In, out.

It didn't help.

The memories swirling in her mind didn't help. Memories she'd buried deep, squashed them down so far because if they surfaced, Corrin feared she would drown.

They suffocated her now.

Oboro's broken body. Tears filled her eyes, streaming down her cheeks to mingle with her blood. Her final words, choked as her lungs filled, as they heaved for air. And Corrin stared.

Horrified. Mortified. Breathless as if she'd been the one to take three arrows to the chest. Oboro's eyes glazed over, clouded, unseeing. Even in the midst of battle, those words she uttered with her final breath reached Corrin. They remained, even now, fresh in her mind.

"…but I wanted to protect you… my sweet Takumi…"

Corrin's hand had clenched tighter around her sword. She hadn't meant for this to happen.

She hadn't meant for this to happen.

Her heartbeat was dizzying in her ears. As loud as a scream, as blinding as the pain rearing up her throat as it tightened.

"…I should have told you… how I felt…"

She couldn't turn away. Her eyes remained transfixed, unable to blink, unable to tear away. Her hand trembled. The body of Hinata lay feet from her. He still clutched the blade given to him by Takumi to his chest.

Corrin felt Oboro's final breath as if it were her own. Fleeting. Unseen by the soldiers that clashed around them. Words that would be forgotten as quickly as her name.

"I have always… loved…"

She couldn't look away. The sight burned into her mind. Everything blurred; the sound of battle, the taste of blood and magic in the air, the brush of cold wind against her face. She became numb. She pushed it down. What she saw, what she felt, she buried it inside until she became numb.

She didn't want to feel anymore.

Corrin didn't deserve to have these thoughts. To know what she did. She had no right to hear those final words, that choked confession, that bled from Oboro as she lay dying. But she'd heard it and now it was all she could hear.

She felt violently sick. Acidic bile rose up her throat, clawing and burning at her flesh and she couldn't swallow it down. She spun on her heels, stopping so abruptly she almost tripped, staggering as she fled into the blanket of trees that surrounded their camp. The darkness of night swallowed her and she breathed in the silence.

She couldn't see. All she could feel was the biting chill of the air. The taste of blood and steel, the tang of magic on her tongue, fell away as she heaved in fresh air, full of earth and oak. She breathed in until her lungs hurt. Until she forgot the taste of war.

She stood there in the dark, in the creeping cold, until she stopped trembling.

Magic burned on her tongue, sharp and foreign and the burst of light that shot towards her seared with heat. She darted from its path, felt her skin prickle with heat, and darkness clouded her vision once more. Corrin tensed. Ripped her sword from her side, grip tight enough to hurt, and listened.

The air rippled with magic. This time, Corrin was ready when the ball of crimson fire came at her. She welcomed the heat, the light, and took a precious moment to look beyond it and found its caster. The fireball whirled past and figure shrouded in darkness was lost in the night.

"It's you–!" Corrin spat as rage flooded her veins. It was the same figure that attacked her when she was falling into the Bottomless Canyon. The one that killed Scarlet.

The desire to flee, to call for help, any instinct of self-preservation blurred into white hot hatred. Another wave of magic washed over Corrin and she lunged. The ball of fire banished the night for a split second – long enough for her to close that distance, to arch her sword towards the figure. She was a fraction too late. The figure's hand erupted in fire, a second spell cast but Corrin was too close, mid strike, she couldn't dodge.

White light blinded her. She skidded to a halt, kicking up twigs and leaves and dirt, bracing for the inevitable heat and searing pain but felt only the cold touch of the night. She opened her eyes to find the trees illuminated in a soft light. A figure stood before her; not the one cloaked in shadows but one she couldn't believe.

A sight she couldn't believe was real.

Queen Mikoto, as radiant and beautiful as she'd been in life, stood before Corrin.

All the rage, the violent hatred inside Corrin drained through her feet, along with everything else she could have felt at that moment. It sucked the air from her lungs. Stole the words from her lips. Her heart faltered, tripping over itself in shock, elation, panic, and finally fear.

"Corrin…"

It had her voice.

Queen Mikoto smiled. Softly, beautifully, perfectly.

Corrin wanted to scream.

It had her smile.

"No…" Corrin took a step back. She shook her head slowly, never taking her eyes off the figure who wore her mother's smile. "It can't be… I saw you die!"

She saw her mother take a final breath before falling silent. She saw the blood pooling through her gown, blooming like crimson flowers across her chest.

She'd seen it twice. She'd lived it twice. And she lived it over and over again in her dreams.

"My child… I'm so happy to see you again."

Corrin scoffed, the sound leaping from her throat halfway between a sob and a laugh. What kind of vision was this? Some form of punishment? It was so bizarre, so insane, it was laughable. As tears formed in her eyes, Corrin wanted to laugh.

She wanted to laugh and laugh and laugh because this couldn't be real. She had finally snapped. Or she'd died long ago and this was her torment.

"No," Corrin said again. She could barely form the word. "You're not– You're not my mother…" She couldn't breathe. Her lungs were heaving for air but she couldn't breathe.

"Please, Corrin… listen to me," Queen Mikoto spoke again. "I'm here to help you."

"No…" Corrin tightened her grip on her Yato, lifted it between them. She could hardly meet the figure's eyes. It looked so much like her mother, sounded so much like her… She shook her head again, swallowing down a sob.

"Corrin–"

"Stop it! Stop using my mother's voice!" The tears came now, streaming hot and fast down Corrin's cheeks. She cut forward with her sword raised high above her head, blinking through a haze of tears, and slashed at the figure.

Her sword stopped dead but an inch above the figure's shoulder. It trembled in her grip, the blade angled at the junction between her shoulder and neck, and Corrin stumbled back. Her sword fell limp in her hand.

"Why…?" She blinked through the tears, spoke through the lump in her throat. "Why didn't you move…?"

Queen Mikoto smiled. It was pained this time, her eyes glistening with unwept tears. "You're my child. Even if you don't believe me… I still love you, with all my heart."

"But… how? How can you be here, like this? I saw you die…"

"What you saw was real. Anankos has revived me as his puppet, though my spirit at least remains my own."

Corrin mind spun. This wasn't just possession but resurrection. Anankos had brought back her mother as a puppet. "If… if that's true then… what should I do? I can't leave you like this…"

"You must kill me."

Corrin couldn't breathe. Queen Mikoto was still smiling so serenely, however faint, that for a moment Corrin thought she'd misheard.

"Only in death can my spirit be saved from his control," Queen Mikoto said. "I know I am asking much from you…"

"I-I can't!" Corrin balked, choking on her words. "You can't ask me to do that. Maybe… maybe Azura could sing for you? And– And we have healers…"

"There is no magic that can free me from his control." Queen Mikoto's eyes fluttered shut, a flicker of pain washing over her features. "Even now, I wonder if a part of him still remains, that I am able to speak to you like this…" She sighed then, and when she opened her eyes they were calm and steeled. It was an image of a ruler, a Queen who stood firm and knew what must be done, that was before Corrin now.

And Corrin knew what was needed from her. What had to be done. What she hadn't been able to do before.

She squeezed her eyes shut and thought back to those final moments. Before the blinding arrow, the blinding pain. She saw him cloaked in a veil of purple fire. Eyes burning with rage, trained on her, a crimson so dark she'd never forget.

She hadn't been able to do it then. The regret had been too much. Seeing him like that, in pain, screaming for her death, tears trickling down his face…

Corrin stood taller and faced Queen Mikoto.

"I'll do it." Corrin raised her Yato, turned it in her hands. Even after making up her mind, her heart thundered in her ears. It crawled up her throat. "But I can't be the only one to see you. Ryoma and the others…"

The pain on Queen Mikoto's face said enough. "I'm afraid I won't have that much time. Anankos' hold wavers but grows stronger with every moment. You must do it now."

"But…"

"I long to see them smile again," she said wistfully. It was a sigh, a breath of longing that would never be fulfilled. "But knowing they are safe… is enough for me."

Corrin's heart ached. She wanted to tell her they were safe but she couldn't form the words. They caught in her throat, she swallowed them down until they churned in her stomach.

She wished, more than ever, that Takumi was safe.

Her eyes burned when she blinked. Every breath she took was shallow and sharp though her lungs heaved.

Queen Mikoto opened her arms, beckoning Corrin forward. "Come here, my dear Corrin. Let me see embrace you one last time…" She smiled softly, painfully.

And Corrin stepped forward. She almost ran. Almost stumbled over her feet to fall into her mother's arms. She was solid and warm and soft. Despite everything Corrin could hear a heart beating as she buried her face into her mother's chest. A steady beat.

Queen Mikoto wrapped her arms around Corrin, pulling her closer, tighter. It was everything Corrin wanted, everything she needed. She let the tears come, let them fall and blur her vision and burn in her eyes.

"I always wanted to get back the days we lost," Queen Mikoto said. Her voice was so familiar, so gentle, and sounded right by Corrin's ear. She struggled not to sob, not to gasp for air as she tried to reply but couldn't form any words. She nuzzled closer into her mother's embrace. She breathed in the heavenly scent of her mother that had her mind filled with the sights of Hoshido, of sakura blossoms and her mother's smile.

"…and now I can."

Corrin had only just registered her mother moving before a needle of searing cold pain shot through her stomach. The warmth was gone. Queen Mikoto stepped back, yanking the dagger from Corrin's stomach with a spray of blood. Blood that coated her hand when she pressed it to the wound, blood that dripped from the blade in her mother's hand. Her blood.

Corrin took a single, shaky step away. "Mother… why…?" The pain was numbing. It throbbed with every heartbeat but it was cold. She felt so cold. "Was… nothing you said… true…?"

Queen Mikoto held the blade higher and smiled softly. Her eyes glistened. "Now we can be together… forever…" She lunged, blade still dripping with blood. The steel flashed in an arch of crimson and silver towards Corrin.

The sickening sound of a sword digging into flesh tore a sob from Corrin's throat. Warm blood spilled over her hands as they trembled. She tightened her grip, hefted her Yato forward and sunk it deeper into her mother's gut. The dagger dropped to the dirt, the sound swallowed by Queen Mikoto's broken gasp. She fell against Corrin, held up by the sword in her gut.

Corrin sobbed. A sharp gasp of air. They fell, together, to their knees. Corrin could barely breathe, let alone speak. "I wanted to believe… I really did." The pain in her stomach faded to a dull throb, the wound barely a scratch. Her dragonstone, burning warm against her skin, began to cool. "I knew… it was too good to be true…"

The tears were coming now. Filling her eyes, blurring her vision. "Asking me to kill you like this…" Her voice broke. She blinked away a dream she had long ago that resurfaced; one of her mother, of Ryoma, of Takumi. She remembered the warmth of Takumi's embrace, the way he shook as he cried against her. "It was already too late…"

Her mother's voice was a whisper in her ear. "…Don't cry… my child…"

"Mother–" It came out broken, choked on a sob. She lay her mother on her back, hands shaking as she struggled with whether to remove her Yato or not. The jagged blade stuck out awkwardly from the deep wound, a crimson ring of blood growing around it.

"There are… so many things I want to tell you…" Queen Mikoto said, her voice faint, rasping. Her lungs heaved with every word, every breath. The light was back in her eyes, though it wouldn't last.

Corrin shook her head. "I'm sorry… I'm so sorry…" She took her mother's hand, held it tightly in her own. It was cold.

"You freed me… I knew you would…" She was smiling. Queen Mikoto was smiling. And Corrin couldn't breathe at the sight, she couldn't hold back the torrent of tears that followed. "I know… you have so many questions… about who you are…"

"Mother, that– that doesn't matter!" Corrin shook her head again, desperately, vehemently.

"It does… and I wanted to tell you who I am… the younger sister of Arete." She smiled now, brightly, as brightly as ever. "You're part of the Vallite royal line, Corrin… a child of Valla…" She stole a shaky breath. "And your father… I promised him I wouldn't tell you about him… He didn't want his sins to be put on you…" Even now, Queen Mikoto smiled. There was something wistful in her voice, in her eyes. "It's up to you, my child. I know… you can defeat him…"

"What…? You mean I'm– mother!"

Queen Mikoto's body washed over in a pale blue light. Her eyes fluttered shut, smile fading. Her body was fading.

"No! You can't go–!" Corrin cried. She fumbled with her mother's hand to hold it tighter, closer, trying to feel that warmth one last time. "Mother!"

"I'm so glad we could be together one last time…" Queen Mikoto breathed, so faintly her words were almost lost in Corrin's sobs. "Tell them… I love them…"

"I will, I promise," Corrin choked. Her mother's hand slipped from hers and she dissolved into swaths of pale light.

Corrin blinked and her mother was gone.

She was alone, her Yato lying on the dirt before her, not a sliver of blood on its entire length. It was as if her mother had never been here. There was no trace of her left. Not a mark on the dirt, not the dagger she left or the blood she'd shed.

Only the shallow wound Corrin carried remained. Only the tears spilling from her cheeks. She dug her hands into the dirt as a scream built and built in her chest. She doubled over and howled. The pain of her loss split her skull. Her scream cut through the silence. She cried until her throat was roar and even then.

Even when her allies raced into the forest upon hearing her scream, to find her there in a heap on the dirt, Corrin cried.

Through her wails, she apologised in broken sobs over and over again. She fell into Ryoma's arms when he helped her stand. Her knees buckled and all she could do was cry. She couldn't meet his eyes. Any of their eyes.

But she would have to tell him. She would have to tell Ryoma and Hinoka and Sakura what happened. What she'd done.

And, when he came back, She'd have to tell Takumi.

She'd have to tear her heart out all over again.

Did I say the last chapter killed me? I think this one resurrected me just to kill me again.

So, obviously, I'm changing revelations a bit.

A bit? I mean a lot.

Duh.

There are a few things that felt rushed with Revelations. A few things that felt out of place or weird. Like how you go from defeating Arete to Mikoto to Sumeragi it just feel like the angst is forced because of the dead parents being brought back thing... I'm not going to change it completely just... spread it out a bit... give them some time to properly grieve... or not.

We'll see.

Anyway,

Thanks for reading! I'm suprised there are people who have stuck with this for so long and read the whole thing. ITS INSANE.

to me, anyway.

See you next chapter!